“Honestly, it’s fine,” Jordyn said. “Things are complicated. A mess, actually.”
“Jordyn works her ass off for that boy,” I said. “She works two jobs. She has her own place. Sam has a great life because of her.”
“Well, any man that would take advantage of your love deserves a kick to the ass,” Uncle Tom said.
Jordyn’s cheeks turned red. “Thank you.”
“You’re a strong woman,” Aunt Millie said. “And believe me, I get how things are now. I don’t know what makes it happen the way it does. But you are very strong.”
Jordyn shifted in her chair. Sam let out a playful yell and commanded some guy named Johnny to drive faster to escape the bad guy.
“He’s a great kid,” I said.
“Seems that way,” Uncle Tom said. “Usually kids his age are little shitheads.”
“Tom!” Aunt Millie yelled.
“What? They are. Parents letting kids run their lives. Never. Not in my day.”
“To be fair, in your day, I’m pretty sure kids were worried about dinosaurs attacking them.”
“Smart ass,” Uncle Tom said.
“Where do you work?” Aunt Millie asked Jordyn.
“Bicker’s. The real estate company…”
“I told you this already, Millie,” Uncle Tom said. “The pretty girl at the desk.”
“That’s you?” Aunt Millie asked. “I think my husband likes you.”
“Do we have a problem here?” I asked, looking at Uncle Tom.
It took a lot for him to get flustered, but he quickly pushed back in his chair and stood up. “Oh, to hell with all of you.”
We all started to laugh, and Uncle Tom went into the so-called study with Sam.
“Don’t mind him,” Aunt Millie said. “He’s like a big teddy bear.”
“I can see that,” Jordyn said.
“What does that make me then?” I asked.
“You’re still a nasty grizzly bear, Ramsey,” Aunt Millie said. “Never could shake your attitude.”
“I learned from the best,” I said.
“I think I learned it from you,” Aunt Millie said.
“Thank you for this dinner,” Jordyn said. “This has been amazing.”
“What’s your plan for Thanksgiving this year?” Aunt Millie asked.
“Uh…”
“Why are you making plans now?” I asked.
“You realize how close it is, right?” Aunt Millie asked. “I want Jordyn and Sam to be here.”
“That’s so nice of you,” Jordyn said. “But that’s a family day. I couldn’t…”
“You’ve seen this table,” Aunt Millie said. “Family isn’t just by blood. Plus, I can see things.”
“See things?” I asked.
“The way you look at her,” Aunt Millie said. She smiled and stood up. “I normally wouldn’t like that look. But I like you, Jordyn. And if he’s giving you that look, then you’re going to need all the family you can get. These men are hardened. But if you get to their hearts, they’re as soft as butter on a warm stove.”
I watched Aunt Millie walk to the kitchen.
Jordyn turned her head and looked at me.
“Calling base, calling base,” Uncle Tom’s voice said. “I need help.”
We both looked into the so-called study.
Uncle Tom was on his knees, playing cars and trucks with Sam.
“I’ve never seen him do that,” I said to Jordyn. “By the time I got here I was a miserable asshole of a teenager.”
“Now you’re the same, just an adult,” Jordyn teased.
“Very funny.”
“It’s good to see,” she said. “He’s never had that before. Any of this, Rams. It’s almost too much to comprehend.”
I touched her hand. “You should embrace it a little, darling.”
She looked at me and looked almost ready to cry.
I leaned in to kiss her just as Aunt Millie announced that dessert was ready.
I had to laugh.
This was the closest to a real family I had ever experienced in my life.
I kissed Jordyn like we were saying goodbye for a year. Her back was against a pillar at the edge of the back patio. A strand of white lights was the only light we had. My hand cupped her face as I tasted her lips, flirted with her tongue, and had to show restraint as the need to take her was growing by the second.
I broke the kiss and let out a deep breath.
The door behind us opened and Aunt Millie came outside to join us.
“Nice night out here,” she said, looking around.
“It’s perfect,” I said.
“What are you two doing out here?” Aunt Millie asked.
“Jordyn was having a cigarette,” I said.
“What? No.” She slapped my arm. “Jerk.”
“I’m only kidding,” I said.
Aunt Millie shook her head. “I’m sorry about him. I tried my best with what I had to work with.”
“Then I feel sorry for you,” Jordyn said. “And yet, you pulled off a miracle.”
“I always tell her she’s a saint,” I said.
Aunt Millie laughed. “I don’t know how I did. And still do it with your uncle, Ramsey. But I did it. I’m just happy you’re happy. After everything that happened…”
“Don’t talk about the past,” I said, feeling a slight bit of unease go through my body.
“I’m going to go check on Sam,” Jordyn said. “Start to pack him up.”
“Hope you’ll be back again,” Aunt Millie said. “Thanksgiving is creeping close.”
“Give it a rest,” I said.
“You can go somewhere else, Ramsey,” Aunt Millie said. “I want Jordyn and Sam here.”
“Replaced,” Jordyn said with a sly grin.
“Wow, she fell for you faster than I did,” I said with a wink.
Jordyn gasped and smiled as she walked toward the house.
I couldn’t take my eyes off her.
Not until she shut the door.
That’s when I exhaled a long breath.
“You’re in love with that one, aren’t you?” Aunt Millie asked.
“Trying to figure it out,” I said. “It’s a tough situation.”
“You’ve been in tough situations before,” she said. “You usually cause them.”
“Thanks for that,” I said.
Aunt Millie touched my back. “Just don’t hurt her. Especially her. She has a son.”
“I know that, Aunt Millie. That’s why we’ve been taking it slow.”
“Slow? Since when do you do slow?”
I looked at her, ready to defend myself. Tell her that Jordyn and I were only together on the weekends Sam was gone with his father. But then everything started to hit me hard. I had spent how many days bringing her coffee during the week… just to see her, even for five minutes. And going to meet Sam. Helping her when her car wouldn’t start when Sam needed to go to the hospital. Then sleeping at her place. Waking up that next morning and making breakfast with Sam. And now spending the weekend with Jordyn when Sam was home.
“Wow, you’re speechless,” Aunt Millie said. “Have you met a woman that can finally shut you up?”
“Maybe I have,” I said.
“Well, I think she’s perfect. She’s probably too good for you. And I swear, Ramsey, if you do anything to hurt that little boy’s heart…”
“I would never do that,” I said. “I’ve done some crappy things, but I would never do that. Not after seeing what his father does.”
“Is it bad?”
“It’s not good. It’s hard to stay out of it. But it’s not my place.”
“Just don’t go punching him or anything,” she said.
“Me? Punch someone?”
She swatted my arm. “Smart mouth.”
“See where I get it from then?” I asked, laughing. “Thank you for dinner. And thank you for letting Jordyn and Sam in. They don’t have anyone. Family, I mean.”
“They’re always welcome here.”
“You say that to everyone.”
“Everyone is welcome here,” she said. “Life isn’t supposed to be easy or fun all the time, Ramsey. You’ve been through a lot in your life. So have I. Your uncle. Everyone that sits at our table. Jordyn. Sam. Even Sam’s father, I bet. Sometimes we do dumb stuff.” She raised an eyebrow and looked right at me. “But if we can sit at the table and forget about our troubles and just be there, over a hot plate of food, and laugh, then it’s worth everything in life.”
I smiled. “You’re too good for everyone.”
“Face it, Ramsey, the ones worth keeping are usually too good for yourself.”
Aunt Millie walked to the door and left me hanging with those last words. Which she was famous for doing.
She opened the door and I saw Sam standing there. Aunt Millie squealed his name and my heart tightened a little bit more.
Jordyn appeared in the doorway and stared at me.
We didn’t need to say a word to each other.
Yet at some point we had to say it. We had to say what we were both thinking. The one thing that would change our relationship even more. Something I hadn’t said in a long time. Something I swore I’d never say again.
I love you.
“Are you sure it’s not too late?” I asked Jordyn.
“It’s the weekend,” she said. “You have a couch, right?”
“Of course I do.”
“Pillows? Blankets?”
“Yes,” I said.
“Then we’re fine,” she said.
We held hands. Sam sat in the back seat of my truck, holding a couple of cars in his hand. He had his bag of toys next to him on the seat.
Jordyn wanted to see my house. And I couldn’t say no to that or to her.
Aunt Millie and Uncle Tom sugared up Sam and left him to us, which was to be expected. Aunt Millie gave out a hundred hugs and a hundred and one kisses. Uncle Tom pulled me in tight for a hug and told me not to fuck things up with Jordyn.
When they said that kind of stuff, I just had to take it on the chin. Because my track record wasn’t exactly clean.
As I turned into the driveway to the old country style house, I felt my heart jump a little. There was a romantic notion buried in the back of my mind about this house. What I intended to do to it and with it.
“It’s a dump,” I said to Jordyn.
“No, it’s not,” she said.
“It’s dark out. You can’t see it.”
“I can see it,” she said.
“It was a fixer upper project,” I said. “I thought it was good for me at the time. But that didn’t work out.”
“At the time?” Jordyn asked, looking at me.
“Let’s get inside first,” I said.
I led the way to the house. I had to warn them to watch their step on the third step up on the porch. It was old and rotted and wobbly. Every time I stepped on the step and it moved, I reminded myself to fix it. I never fixed it.
The entrance to the house had a large foyer with the main steps off to the right. They turned three times to get upstairs and the woodwork along the railing and the landing was all custom. It just needed to be touched up with fresh stain. Along the steps were stained glass windows. At first, they seemed dated and ugly, but whoever built the house knew what they were doing.
I pointed to the windows and said, “They look ugly, but the sun in the morning hits them. And it spreads color across the foyer and into the living room.”
“That must look beautiful,” Jordyn said. “This house is gorgeous.”
I laughed.
Some of the walls still had old wallpaper on them, with the corners slightly curled. There were pocket doors from the living room into the formal dining room. The archways were all custom wood, again, just needing touch-up work.
I gave the two-minute tour of the downstairs and watched the way Jordyn’s eyes lit up with each room. Everything I saw that was shit, she saw as beauty. Every flaw I pointed out that needed work, she saw something that needed just a little attention.
The most important room to Sam was the living room. I got him set up on the couch with a blanket and a pillow. With his favorite stuffed animal tucked under his left arm and the remote to the TV in his right hand, he was the king of the house.
Jordyn kissed the top of his head and told him to close his eyes if he got tired.
I motioned for the kitchen and there, I opened the fridge. “I’ve got milk, beer, and water. Possibly some orange juice, but I’m not exactly sure how old that is.”
Jordyn laughed. “How about water?”
“I can make that happen,” I said.
I got us each a glass of water and took Jordyn to the back deck.
It was chilly outside, but the air had a crispness to it that reeked of fall. It amazed me how in fall everything was about death and dying, yet so many people enjoyed it. The smell of the wet ground, wet leaves, dead leaves.
“This is amazing out here,” Jordyn said. “I mean this house…”
“In the summer you can stand here and watch fireflies,” I said. “It’s like the entire backyard lights up. Just flickering lights. Over and over.”
“So, dare I ask the million-dollar question?” Jordyn asked.
“What’s that?”
“Why did you buy this house if you’re…”
“Alone?” I asked.
“Yeah,” she said.
That was my moment to confess everything to Jordyn.
I left my glass on the railing and walked to her. I took her glass out of her hand and placed it on the table. The back porch light was off. The only light was coming from inside the house. My hands touched her face and I swallowed hard.
“Darling… I love you,” I said. “I’m not sure if that’s the right thing to say right now. I don’t know what we are. Or what we’re doing. Or where this is going. But I can’t help how I feel and I can’t hold it back any longer. I love you. And everything in your life.”
I gently kissed her lips and backed away. Jordyn quickly dug her nails into my forearms.
“Rams…”
“Yeah?”
“I’m in love with you, too.”
23
We Forgot the Ending
Jordyn
I would sometimes watch Sam sleep and wonder if I’d ever fall in love with another man again. And if I did, what it would be like for Sam. How he’d take it. Or how he’d understand that. The cruel reality that he would always bear the scar of a broken family.
But as I stood there on the back porch of Ramsey’s house, knowing my son was safe on the couch, that Sam trusted Ramsey and I trusted Ramsey, and that Ramsey’s aunt and uncle took me and Sam in as though they’d known us for years…
“I love you,” I said. “I mean it, Rams. I love you.”
It was scary to be in love with someone new. It was scarier to have to protect my heart and Sam’s heart.
“You don’t know what you mean to me, Jordyn,” Ramsey said. “This has been building inside me for a while. The every-other-weekend thing was fun… but I want more than that. And I have to answer the question you asked.”
“About the house?”
“Yeah.”
“Rams, I don’t care why you bought this house,” I said.
“I was engaged once before,” he said.
That sort of surprised me. “Oh?”
“After Brian was killed, everything else in the world just fell apart. I know I told you about this already, but it was the moment where it all just collapsed. Aunt Millie and Uncle Tom took me in and you know what happened from there. I bounced around schools and towns, running from them, coming back, until I finally had to smarten up a little. I had to finish high school and I had to do something with myself. I met someone at my lowest point. She didn’t save me, Jordyn, but she was there for me. We were there for each other, you know? We were young. We fell in love. And we were just… there.”
“Tha
t’s okay, Rams. You know my situation with Keith. High school bad boy sweetheart that never went away. I never escaped to experience anything in life. It was all just laid out for me. I kind of counted on Keith to be my family. To replace the family I either never had or lost. I forced myself to overlook all the red flags. And the rest is history.”
“It’s not that simple for me, darling,” Ramsey said. “It was comfortable, but I wasn’t sure what that meant. I went to work for Uncle Tom and did all I could to save the company with him. And we did a good job. Guys like Matt became something like best friends to me. I was the best man at his wedding. His marriage right now is a mess, but that’s not part of this story. What I’m trying to say is that we… no, I let a moment dictate an entire relationship. Aunt Millie forever wanted a big family. She wanted kids. She wanted grandkids. What you gave her tonight was something you can’t imagine.”
I suddenly felt flustered. “So, they never had…”
“Never worked out,” he said. “Their families were a mess too. That’s what always gave me hope. Seeing those two together. And Aunt Millie fell in love with Sarah.”
“That was your…”
“Yeah,” he said. “She was my…” He looked away for a second. “The entire thing just grew. I never reeled it in. I never took the time to figure it out. It’s such a cheap excuse to say I was suddenly engaged.”
“You can tell me anything, Rams. Whatever happened. Or why. If you were just trying to make your aunt happy. There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“That feels like a worse excuse, Jordyn. But what happened after that… that’s the worst. And the reason why it all happened. That’s why I ended up buying this house. I wanted to fix it up. I had plans made to take down walls, add windows, turn it into this beautiful home for a family. The family I would never have. Maybe to punish myself for everything that happened. Or maybe to flip the house and make some money.”
I swallowed hard. I saw the look on his face.
“The family you would never have?” I asked. “What does that mean?”
“Exactly what I said. Uncle Tom had me so involved in the business, I didn’t know what day of the damn week it was. Everywhere I turned, Sarah was doing something and planning something. Aunt Millie was loving her life, cooking big meals, talking about the future in a way that made me wonder if I was just there as a figure or to have a purpose. And it all fell apart. Because of me. I… I ruin things, darling. Telling you I love you just now? That was probably bad. Because I ruin things.”
Every Other Weekend Page 23