Encouraged by such an unequivocal confirmation of how much Mila deserved this freedom, Yara moved her mind to Mila’s forehead marking. She felt the le-feer gently removing the locks of darkness that burdened the Photaks, the ones that caused their severe reaction to prolonged darkness. She then traveled, marking after marking, along her spine, chest, arms, legs until every one of Mila’s body markings was free. Yara chose to leave the little Photak with a bit of Skotad sight, to enable her to see as clearly in darkness as she would in light.
By the time the freedom ceremony was over, Yara felt intimately close with her le-feer in a way that even Nox knew no amount of training could have ever facilitated. Opening her eyes, she saw Mila’s face shining with joy.
“You can open your eyes now, MilaStar.” Yara said softly.
“How do you feel, young Mila?” Nox asked as her excited eyes popped open.
Mila looked around strangely within the shadowed Greens, her face growing with ecstasy.
“Things… look different!” she exclaimed. “I can see all the colors and they seem so much brighter…and everything, everything looks so clear. OH MY! EVERYTHING IS CLEAR! Yara, I can see! I can see in the shadows of the Greens! I can see everything!!”
Yara laughed at Mila’s glee, feeling her heartstar burst wide open to bring such freedom to the girl who had saved her life.
“Yara,” Mila gushed, “is this how the world looks to you, and to Toler?”
“Yes, my sweet child, my MilaStar, this is what I see when I look around.”
Mila pointed at everything, wanting to know what each thing was, including the Saptrees nearby. Squealing, she rushed over to take a drink, squishing her face into the tree in the exact way Yara had back when she was unmarked. Yara grinned in recollection of how much Toler had laughed at her rudimentary manner.
“And how do you feel, my Queen?” Nox asked as Mila sprinted from rocks to plants to trees.
Yara took a moment to consider his question. She was stunned by how much energy she had. Unlike when she had used her Spreuken side, she didn’t feel drained at all. In fact, Yara felt completely refreshed in an inexplicable way. She felt so refreshed, in fact, that it was almost as though the experience had even healed her soul of the pain from using her powers against Malek.
“I feel better than I’ve felt in a very long time, Master Nox. Thank you for this teaching. Thank you for trusting me with this knowledge.”
Nox smiled widely as Mila ran back to them, pleased that he had served his Queen and Sunstar. Seeing Mila changed had secretly confirmed to Nox that he too was walking his true path.
“MilaStar,” Yara said with a glint in her eyes. “How do you feel about surprising Toler with your newfound freedom, and perhaps being there when I gift him with his?”
Mila looked like she was ready to explode.
“YESSSSSS!”
Chapter Twelve
Toler, in his room in the Skotad tunnels, jumped as a loud knock interrupted his concentration. He leaned back from the Eld scrolls he had been diligently translating for Yara, hoping that the knocker would go away.
But the knocking continued. He sighed and pushed himself up, mentally grumbling as he had asked not to be disturbed. But he had never been happier, or more relieved, by a disturbance when he saw who was standing on the other side of his door.
“TolerStar,” Yara said grinning widely, “I have a surprise for you!”
Toler’s blush at her second use of Star in his name was hard to hide. He cleared his throat and tried to compose himself.
“Okay, I’m game. What is it?” he said, trying to retain some measure of manliness in his voice.
“It’s MEEEE!” squealed Mila, bursting from around the corner and rushing into Toler’s arms.
“Mila?! MILA!” Toler exclaimed hugging her tightly. “It is sooo good to see you again, brave little Photak warrior! How are you here? Yara and I once spoke of showing you this place but…but bringing you here would mean…”
Toler’s expression went from joyful to broken in a second.
“How… are you here, Mila? Yara, how is she here? Oh no, little one, have you been Light Blinded? I’m so sorry…I know how much you loved the rays of Sunstar.”
“Nope… I haven’t!” Mila responded, grinning mischievously.
Toler’s eyes raced back and forth between an amused Yara and a very thrilled Mila.
“Oh!” “That must mean you were brave enough to go through the Blurry and travel the Greens, at such a young age! Did you really put yourself through that to come see me?”
“Nope, not the Blurry either,” Mila retorted, barely holding in what she wanted to say.
Toler looked up at Yara with complete bewilderment filling his face. Neither Yara nor Mila had stopped smiling. In fact, Yara hadn’t looked so happy in a very long time.
Yara nodded toward the door and he allowed them both to enter his room, shutting the door behind him.
“I have something to tell you, Toler,” she whispered, “but I can’t have many people knowing about it just yet. You have to promise to not tell anyone. Not even your father. Only you and Grandam can know of this. Promise me, Toler!”
“Okay! I promise! I do…” he responded with desperation. He needed to understand what was happening.
“Master Nox revealed something to me yesterday, something that changes everything.” Yara said in even more hushed tones. “My royal marking has the power to…remove the curse of the Blurry, and of Light Blindness. And I can enhance a Photak’s sight as well. I was able to take away Mila’s inability to see in darkness, forever! She can see in darkness, Toler! She will never suffer from the curse of the Photaks!”
“Never ever!” Mila squealed as Yara implored her to be quieter.
Toler’s face was the epitome of disbelief. To him, there was no possible way that the genetic makeup of the Tribes could be changed. Yet here was Mila, standing in front of him, not looking even remotely unable to see.
Another thought followed immediately as his belief began to take root. What Yara was saying, he realized, meant that the Photaks could be free of the one defense that the Skotads had against them. Nothing would stop the Photaks from attacking the Skotads in the mountains if they were free from their curse.
Fear filled his face.
“This is dangerous, Yara. Freeing the Photaks...” he said unsteadily. “This means they can come from us while we sleep here… I don’t think I understand what you have done for them…”
“No, no, Toler, I have only freed Mila,” Yara said, empathetic to his concern. She admired that the first thing he thought of was the safety of his people. He was going to make a great Chief one day.
“The Photaks aren’t free of their curse, then.”
“No, and they don’t deserve to be…not at this time.”
“So then, Mila…Mila, this is your blessing! You are completely free!” Toler said, finally understanding the extent of the good news they had come to share. “I am so happy that you will get to come see me whenever you want, MilaStar!”
Mila giggled in response and looked at Yara, bursting to tell him more. Yara nodded, giving her permission to share the fantastic news.
“Don’t you want to come see me whenever you want too?” Mila asked sweetly.
“What…?” Toler questioned softly, afraid to even imagine that it could be possible.
“Don’t you?!” Mila pressed.
“Well, of course I would, little one—”
“Good! Because Yara’s going to remove your curse too, Toler! She’s going to change you, too, but in a different way, so that you can withstand Sunstar’s rays like I can. She is going to free you from the Skotad curse, from the shadows and the mountain!”
Toler gaped at Mila then slowly turned to Yara.
“Is what Mila is saying… is it true?”
“Yes. I am going to free all of you, Toler… all of the Skotads,” Yara responded warmly. “For your service, protection, and loyalty
to me even before we knew that I was the Eld Queen, I am going to break the curse of the Skotads.”
Toler fell back into his chair, speechless, staring wide-eyed at Yara.
“What are you saying? What are you saying?” he whispered when he finally found his voice. “You mean, we can dwell out there? Outside of these mountains. Walk in Sunstar’s rays…we can actually be free of this torture, find a new home, never be at war with the Photaks ever again over land or fruit or mushrooms or…”
“Yes! Yes! Yes!” Mila squealed.
“Yes, TolerStar…” Yara confirmed, “that’s what I’m saying. And you’re the first Skotad that I will free, as soon as you’re ready. And then Grandam, as my gesture of gratitude for all you have both done for me. But…you can’t tell anyone about this just yet. I don’t want to cause a stir before the council formally votes on the freedom of all of the Skotads. Informally though, no one has opposed the idea. Master Nox says the vote will likely be unanimous, as the Eld also feel a need to reward the Skotads for their loyalty even after four thousand years. I think they know that Skotads no longer need to be slaves to Sunstar’s rays to control your submission to Sunstar. Your beliefs already drive that. I think they also know that times have changed, so perhaps they should as well.”
Toler shook for a few moments, unable to wrap his mind around what this would mean for his people. He kept shaking his head and then looking at Mila, as if he were reaffirming his belief in the impossible becoming possible.
Then, when he seemed to finally accept the miracle of freedom, he stood up and walked over to Yara, bringing her into his arms and squeezing her so tightly she couldn’t breathe. Toler didn’t let her go. Not until he whispered.
“I have so much love for you, YaraStar…This is the greatest gift I have ever been given. Thank you.”
A part of her wanted to pull away, a little scared of his boldness, but instead Yara closed her eyes and felt herself absorbed into Toler’s body. She understood that, in a moment like this, she couldn’t censor him or push him away. His endearing words and actions also made her feel loved in a way that birthed a desire for a different kind of existence. This was the kind of Queen she wanted to be, one who could grant this kind of freedom to all of her people.
As Toler eventually let her go, there were tears streaming down his face.
“I am grateful to Sunstar for the day I stumbled upon you in the Greens. I want you to know you have my loyalty for the rest of my days,” he said, formally bowing as a Skotad before her.
“That’s not necessary!” she pushed back.
“It is!” he said gravely, still bowing.
Mila walked over to where he stood and followed suit, bowing as she had seen the Eld do in the Photak village.
“Like thissss, Toler!” she hissed at him as he rearranged his hands. Mila then made a soft, meaningful statement. “You’re our Queen, YaraStar.”
It was Yara’s turn for tears to fill her eyes. She reached over to them both, raising them up from their bows, and then embracing them together.
“We are in this together, not as Queen and subjects, but as friends. Thank you for the blessing of your friendship.”
After some moments of nostalgia, recounting all they had been through together, Yara pulled away from the group hold.
“Okay, enough of this! We need to focus on the very important thing we came here to do! I long to walk with you in Sunstar’s rays, Toler. Let’s arrange the appropriate time for your curse’s removal.”
As they discussed the process and what it would take, confirming a location and a time to perform the next freedom ceremony, Mila soon grew restless and longed to move around again.
“Are you going to show me all your spots in here?” She pointedly asked Toler.
“Certainly, young MilaStar,” he responded, chuckling. “Follow me!”
***
As Yara, Toler, and Mila walked through the Skotad territory, they came upon the communal area where the Skotads shared their meals. A few Skotad children were laying there, and among them were two Light Blinded Photak children. Mila stared wide-eyed for a few seconds before looking toward Yara. Upon getting a nod of approval, Mila flew toward them with a happy skip, excited to join their game.
“It is so good to see her like this…” Toler said, a surreal tone still in his voice.
“That day, when we spoke about wishing Mila could see this place,” Yara replied softly, “I didn’t think it could ever happen. Yet, here she is…”
“I didn’t think it could either, not unless she was Light Blinded and I would have never wished that upon her. It is still incredible to me that any of this is possible.”
“Well,” Yara said, laughing, “there was no way I would have thought when we set out for the Photak village yesterday, that I would be bringing back our darling Mila!”
“You know,” Toler said with a touch of seriousness, “you haven’t told me what happened when you went there. How did they react when they saw you? I am sure they regretted ever mistreating you for all those years!”
Yara looked down, smile vanishing, as she remembered the traumatic events of the day. She had gotten so caught up in the joy that freeing Mila had brought that she hadn’t faced the true extent of her dark rage… her inner destroyer.
“I haven’t told you…because I don’t think you’d be proud of me if you knew, Toler. In fact, you may not see me the same anymore…”
“I don’t think there is anything you can do to make me any less proud of you or to see you differently. I don’t expect you to be perfect, Yara. No one is, not even an Eld Queen.”
“I know you may feel that way now…but you don’t know what I did, what’s inside of me…”
“Then tell me, Yara. Allow me to show you how much I believe in you, no matter what.”
Yara sighed, gazing at Toler’s innocent, earnest eyes. Somehow in that moment, all she could think of was Kristos’ reaction toward her when she first discovered that she could see in the shadows.
She took a deep breath as she looked away, preparing herself for his reaction.
“I almost killed Malek, Toler…” she whispered.
Toler looked at her wide-eyed, but instead of the rejection she expected, compassion flooded his face.
“Oh Yara, I am so sorry. I can’t imagine what it must have felt like, facing the Photak who was so merciless to your Tribe parents. How can you say that I wouldn’t be proud of you? You said almost! I am sooo proud that you were strong enough to resist the urge.”
“Except I didn’t resist it,” Yara responded bluntly. “Honestly, everything in me wanted him dead…and my Spreuken power rose in response. It fueled me so much that I destroyed many areas of the village, and many were injured. The only reason Malek isn’t dead is that Mila rushed in, risking her life, to embrace me in the midst of it all. If Mila hadn’t stopped me, I am sure that he would be dead. I wanted him dead…”
Yara glanced at Toler as he stared at her with grave concern.
“And I still want him dead, Toler. That’s the truth,” she finished with brows furrowed in anguish.
Toler was silent for a minute, pensively considering what she had said. Eventually, he turned toward her and rested his hands upon her shoulders.
“Listen, YaraStar. You have every right to feel how you feel. If that had happened to my father and mother, I cannot pretend I wouldn’t feel the same, or perhaps even worse. I do not see you any differently. You were always quick to point out that you were not sure where you stood on all of these matters yet. But I think that is the real source of your inner torture.”
“Inner torture?” Yara asked, puzzled.
“Yes. You spoke of your Spreuken power rising within you, responding to your desire to seek vengeance for the deaths of your Tribe parents. But when you told me of the freedom ceremony, you spoke exclusively about your Agarb power, and you never looked happier. It is clear that there is some conflict as both desires are very real but they are fueled
from two very different places within you. And I think they will continue to be at war until you get to know both sides intimately, and then decide who you are going to be…and in so doing, you will decide what kind of Queen you want to be. Perhaps the fundamental question is, are you going to be a Spreuken, or an Agarb…”
Yara gawked at him, baffled by his very insightful, balanced reaction to what she had just confessed. Skotads were exceedingly loving creatures. They believed that the pursuit of revenge for any reason was to wrongfully decide the will of Sunstar. Toler had previously discouraged her from pursuing vengeance against Malek, despite witnessing the evil he had done when he killed Yara’s Tribe mother.
“Where did your change of heart on this matter come from?” Yara asked suspiciously.
“Oh, no, I don’t have a change of heart. I see it as my people see it–it is not the Skotad way, and I don’t think it ever will be. However, in reading these scrolls from the lines of your ancestors, I can see where they had to make very hard decisions for the greater good of the Eld. I am not in your position, YaraStar, so I can never know what it would be like to have all of this upon my shoulders. At the end of it all, if you feel guided that Mira would be a better planet without Malek, then I will stand by your side. I would only advise that you give him a chance to speak his piece to you if that be your decision, so that he may find his peace before departing this world.”
As Yara gazed upon Toler, she was overcome with respect for the wisdom of his words. She also felt exceptionally touched by his acceptance of what seemed to be her darker, Spreuken side. While she knew that there was something undeniably pure and divine when she channeled her Agarb power, she also felt that there was a freedom in the Spreuken power that was a big part of her. And if she was committing to get to know herself, and then to make a decision as to the kind of Queen she wanted to be, she needed to get to know all of who she was.
She smiled gratefully.
“Thank you, Toler. I will heed your advice. And in so doing, I should take my leave. I have accepted a celebratory dinner invitation with Master Lucerne and his family on this first night of Mira, so I need to get ready. We will be joining the rest of the Eld thereafter, and I hope you will join us to see the coming of the night. I’ve heard it’s a sight to behold!”
The Eld Queen (The YaraStar Trilogy Book 2) Page 11