by K J Carr
I sat back thinking. “So, if the female lycanthrope shifts while pregnant, it impacts the pup?”
Everyone around me nodded, their faces a variety of solemnness and sadness. These were wolves where miscarriage was common, all because of something that came naturally to them. Perhaps that is something I can research more.
Baron blew out air, standing and jostling Miranda out of his lap. She landed on her feet, turning to glower at her mate. He smiled and took her hand, walking to the door.
“Miranda and I have always wanted to explore the northern woods so we will take the rest of our Pack and head up there and establish a territory. Shane, you will take over this area in the south. Mercer wants to take Tessa and move to somewhere in between our Packs. He wouldn’t tell me where, but with him between us, that should work fine. If needed, we can work together to deal with larger issues, such as if Edward shows his face again.”
“Sounds good.” Shane waved at the Alpha, before turning to Max. “Welcome to the Pack. It surprised me you wanted to come.”
Max shrugged, standing. “It would be best for the baby. Besides that, I enjoy working with you.” He gave Shane a mischievous grin. “So, who will be your Beta? Or Betas?”
Shane groaned. “Splinter. But I think Shaz may have a chance. Boomer hates being responsible for others. That is why he works so well with Splinter. Boomer likes to work in the shadows.”
Max nodded. He turned to me.
“Now, about shifting…”
I shuddered. “I know nothing about that, Max.”
Shane lifted my hand and kissed it. “Have you ever felt like there is someone inside you? Something more than just you? Something that just wanted to get out?”
I thought back to when Edward had me chained down. “Yes, when Edward had me in his lab.”
Shane grimaced, before looking up at Max. “Do you think I should try to force her shift? Would it hurt her?”
I studied the doctor, his face pensive as he thought.
“I would say that if there isn’t a wolf there, it shouldn’t hurt her much. If there is, the first shift will be painful since she is so much older now than a typical first shift.”
He turned back to me. “Holden?”
I nodded. “Let’s try. I am not sure what you can do, but I would like to see if I can become a wolf.” The excitement caused butterflies to flutter in my stomach.
Shane
I reached down my mate bond, searching for my mate’s wolf. My wolf traveled with me, darting ahead and sniffing out corners in her mind. My wolf was eager to meet his wolf counterpart, her wolf self. I wasn’t certain Holden even had a wolf. Nothing so far showed that she did.
My wolf leaped forward and rushed to a dark area deep in her core, startling me. I followed behind, my pace more hesitant.
There, in the darkness, a small reddish wolf cowered. My wolf whined, scratching at the darkness as if it was a solid wall, trying to get to his mate. I studied it. I wasn’t sure what to do, but I didn’t want to leave her wolf there, in the dark. Not if she could shift. I just didn’t know what that darkness was or represented. Or where it came from.
I tried to reach in to grab the small wolf, but the gloom hid my hands. Nor could I feel her. I pulled back. I needed light. What was light?
Love.
I pushed my love and admiration of Holden towards the dark wall, trying to reach the wolf. I told her how much she meant to me – how much she had always meant to me since the first time I had met her. I showed her memories of when we had worked together, both in the distant past and now, letting her feel what I felt.
All the while, my wolf scratched and scrabbled, digging a hole in the darkness.
I wrapped her in love, talked to her about my wishes for our future, how we would live and grow together. About Lexi, Soren and Betta. About the new Pack, and our new life.
I felt the pups join with me in my mind, via the Pack bonds, and Maggie and Max, all sending their love to her. Lexi’s light was so bright it outshone us all, but still the darkness caged the small wolf.
As my thoughts trailed off, uncertain what else to do, my wolf broke through enough that the small red wolf could push its head through. Both of us grabbed her and pulled.
Holden’s mind threw me out as she shifted for the first time, her body changing into the reddish wolf. Her shift was swift, completing in minutes.
“Well, that was exciting.” Max gave me an exhausted smile, as he knelt beside her, his hands traveling over the panting wolf. He would make sure we had done no damage to her by forcing her into a shift this first time.
I sighed, tired, my eyes running over my mate. She was beautiful. Smaller than she should have been, but that may have been because Holden’s mind had somehow locked her in. I doubted she would ever had shifted if she hadn’t had a mate and a Pack supporting her.
Her coat was a mix of thick red and brown fur, making her almost look like an older puppy puffball, or an older but less red version of Lexi. Her eyes were no longer just gray, but a green-gray color that stood out with her coat. She had points of black on her ears and her four paws were black. And there was a small, heart-shaped bit of white fur on her chest. To me, she looked almost like a fox, except bigger and leggier.
I smiled.
Holden, my mate, you are gorgeous. I sent my love down our bond.
Holden
I turned to look at Shane, my eyes glazed, but excited.
I am a wolf! Shane, I am a wolf! I turned my head this way and that, forcing Max to move to keep from bumping me.
You are. His grin got bigger.
All the smells! I didn’t know there were so many smells. You smell great, like pine trees and… I stopped and gave a little sniff in his direction. And spice!
I turned and sniffed Max, yipping when he tapped me on the nose.
“Let me finish my examination, Holden.”
Ha! He smells like grass and roses. I sneezed. I think I am allergic to grass and flowers. I grinned.
“You know I can hear you, Holden, right? You are not talking to Shane on the mate bond, but on the general Pack ones.” Max’s voice was absentminded, as he checked out my paws and then shone a light into my eyes. He sat back, looking up at Shane. “Perfect. Small, but perfect.”
Shane chuckled. “And now we will never hear the end of this. The wolf biologist who is a wolf.”
I got up and took a few steps before tripping and falling on my face.
Oomph! Walking with four legs is hard!
The men laughed.
A young girl’s voice responded in my head. Mama Holden! Let your wolf walk for you. Give her reign over your body because she knows what to do.
Lexi? Is that you? I can talk to you even when I am a wolf?
You are Uncle Shane’s mate now, part of the Pack. You can talk to all of us – Betta, Soren and Maggie — at all times.
I stood up and danced around, my wolf keeping me on my feet as I moved about the room, ending up next to Shane, who was leaning forward, watching me, a huge grin on his face.
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you, Shane! But let’s go for a run. I want to run! I want to…
I sat down and lifted my muzzle and howled, the sound a little weak at first but gaining in volume. A faint response came from the pups in the distance.
Shane couldn’t resist. He shifted, his silver wolf rubbing up against me, his tail wagging.
You are huge! I looked at him, my eyes wide.
He laughed, giving me a playful nip on the ear. That’s what they all say.
Huffing, I turned away. You know what I meant.
I watched as Max opened the cabin door before shifting himself. I approached the brown and gray wolf. Hey, Max!
Holden. I thought you wanted to run. The mirth in Max’s tone came through on the bond.
I could hear Shane groan behind me as I moved out onto the porch. Yes, let’s run.
I went to leap off the porch, but Shane was faster. He moved in front o
f me, stopping me from jumping and landing on my face again. He took the lead, nudging me into the direction he thought was best. We entered the woods and ran straight towards the compound, meeting the pups and Maggie about half way there. Then our Pack ran deeper into the trees to show me what it was like to hunt and play in the woods as a wolf.
Hours later, Max peeled off to return to his mate and the rest of us headed back to the compound. The pups shifted and dressed. Shane shifted back, pulling on sweats before strolling into the kitchen to make dinner, while I waited impatiently, realizing that I had no clue how to shift back.
Lexi ran her hands through my fur. “Think of your human self, Mama. Imagine yourself as you always have been.”
Shane turned as I started to shift back, the shift going slower this time because I was building the image of myself in my mind. He reached down the mate bond and gave me a little push back into my human self, helping to speed up the shift.
Lexi got a blanket and threw it over me as I finished.
“That was hard!” I laid out flat on the deck, my lungs straining to get enough oxygen.
Betta, eating an apple, came and sat near me. “It will get easier, Mama.” The little girl leaned against me, as if she needed the touch. Lexi leaned against my other side.
Soren, though, held himself apart from his sisters, watching us. Shane started to speak, but I beat him to it.
“Soren.” I sat up and my arms opened wide. The little boy jumped onto my lap, flinging his arms around my neck. “Don’t become a serious Alpha too soon. I want to enjoy you as a little boy.” I nuzzled his hair.
Chapter 22
Holden
The pups were sleeping when I walked out onto the back deck, looking up at the night sky. We had put them in the second bedroom, in the queen-size bed, for the night. Shane was on his computer in the living room, but I was feeling restless. I had come outside to breathe in the night air and observe the night.
Everything seemed more alive now. Now that I had the senses of a wolf. I could hear the smaller animals in the surrounding forest, burrowing in for the night or going out foraging for food. I could smell the trees and the flowers that were blooming nearby. And of the people living in my house.
This was different. This was new. But I was at peace.
A hand came around my waist, a blade held close to my neck. I breathed in, smelling nothing. Except someone held me immobile.
“Don’t move, Holden. Not until I tell you to.” The words slithered through the night air.
Edward.
How had he been able to mask his scent? How had he been able to hide his footsteps? Or had he been hiding here while we had been playing in the woods?
My panic flared and traveled down my Pack bond, alerting Shane and waking the pups, before I sent out an image of the knife at my neck.
“What are you doing here, Edward?” I tried to keep my voice calm, but a little wobble came through.
“Getting you back. Those wolves stole you from me. But you are mine. I saw you turn. You can become a wolf like they can. And yet, you are not a full lycanthrope. I will figure out your secret and I will sell it to the military. I will use it on myself. Perhaps then you will mate with me. Once I have killed that obnoxious male you have been hanging around with, you will have little option.”
His voice was quiet, a hiss in my ear, as he pulled me back into the shadows on the deck.
I realized then that Edward knew nothing about wolves. Or at least none of the important things. Like how bonded mates would not have sex with anyone except their mate. Or how Packs could talk to each other without words, the communication effortless. He also didn’t take into consideration that a Pack would protect all members, and that I was now part of a Pack.
“How do you expect to kill him? He is both a wolf and a military man. He has more skills as a human than you do.” I wanted to keep him from looking for Shane, who had glided back towards the bedroom. I wanted to keep him from noticing the smaller black shadow that was Soren, creeping around the outside of the deck. The pup must have gone out the front door and then came back into the compound somehow, to circle around his prey like this.
Hunting wolves made no sound.
Warning ones growled, though.
A faint growl came from the house. Betta, in wolf form, and Lexi, as a little girl, moved into the living room.
“Damn it, those brats are up! I thought you put them to sleep.”
“We did.”
He swung me around, pushing me up against the railing, looking for the steps. Seeing them, he pulled me towards them. I tried to keep my balance, knowing my Pack was getting into place, that he wouldn’t take me away from here. In fact, I wasn’t sure he would survive tonight.
“Let’s go. I don’t need those brats anymore.” Shadows crossed Edward’s face. I could hear the ugliness in his voice as his greed for what the wolves had eluded him.
He had taken the first step down on the stairs when Soren flew out of the shadows and latched onto his upper thigh, very close to the man’s genitals.
Edward screamed. He didn’t let go of me, in fact he pulled me in tighter, while he grabbed the small wolf by the neck and tried to pull him off. The arm around my neck, which had been holding the knife, lowered. That was enough to change the balance of power.
“Let go, you fucking little rat!”
“Don’t call my brother a rat.” Lexi’s voice was firm. Betta, beside her, growled. The two girls had slipped out the doors, onto the deck. Betta darted forward and bit Edward from behind, her teeth digging into his ass.
I wondered where Shane was, but perhaps we didn’t need him. The pups were taking their revenge on Edward, which they needed. In fact, there were a few things I wanted to do to him for kidnapping me. Particularly now that the knife rested on my collarbone instead of my neck.
This idiot had killed Thomas. As the thought rose in my mind, I growled and shoved an elbow back into Edward’s torso, my other hand coming up to hold the hand with the knife still. It slipped a little and cut me, but I didn’t feel it. I felt Betta pulling the man off balance from behind and Soren readjusting his mouth in front.
Someone grabbed the knife from his loose grip, as I whirled around and jabbed my fist into Edward’s face, breaking his nose.
“You killed Thomas! There was no reason for you to kill Thomas, you asshat! He was your brother! He loved you!” Tears flowed down my face as I hit him again, his arms flying up to cover his face from the worst of my blows.
I didn’t notice the pups drop off and move away, sitting to watch me, their eyes wide with amazement. I didn’t notice that Shane was here, holding a gun pointed at Edward’s back. I just released my anger, hitting the object of so much pain and mental anguish over and over, the sounds of my fists hitting his flesh loud in the night.
The man dropped to the deck, but I followed him down, straddling him, my fists flying.
Shane caught me around the middle, lifting me off the man, the gun still trained on him. Edward just laid on the deck, his hands over his head, his face bloody.
“Holden. Ease up, love. Those hands will hurt in the morning.”
“He killed him, Shane. He killed him.” I turned and buried my face in his shoulder.
Edward rolled over onto his front, his head in his hands. Shane tracked his movements with the gun.
“I know, love. I know.”
Shane
Car doors shut and footsteps rushed through the house.
“Out here, Baron.” I didn’t raise my voice, my eyes glued to the man who was now bleeding from bites to his leg and ass, as well as his battered face.
Baron showed up and slowed. “Whoa. Who beat the crap out of him?”
I nodded at the two men with him. Splinter and Boomer each grabbed an arm and dragged Edward up between them. He swayed but somehow stayed standing, glowering at all of us as best he could with one eye swollen shut.
“Holden.” I lowered the gun, putting the safety o
n and shoving it into my jeans at the small of my back, before wrapping both arms around Holden. “She needed to take out some of her anger on him. The pups got to have a taste.”
Lexi giggled, while Soren turned his head away, huffing.
Baron just shook his head. “Don’t get her mad, Shane. It looks like she hits hard.” He jerked his head, and the two men started to drag Edward off.
“She is mine!” He screamed at us. Splinter and Boomer stopped. I looked at him, my face void of emotion.
“She was never yours, Edward. She had been your brother’s wife, but you killed him. She now is my mate. And you will never, ever get this close to her again. You have stolen and tortured my nieces and nephew. You have murdered my brother and his mate. You had taken and tortured my mate. You will not get your day in court. You will not get a judge and jury. Instead, we will try you based on Pack Law. I am Alpha and I decree it. Take him.”
Edward opened his mouth to scream out again, but Boomer turned into him and gave him a quick neck chop, catching him as the man went down, unconscious.
“One way to get him to shut the fuck up.” Splinter chuckled. The two men then dragged him out of the compound.
Baron looked at me.
“Coming?”
I nodded, putting up a hand with five fingers up. Baron nodded and left, following the other two. Soon after, car doors shut, and the car started up.
“Come on, pups. Back to bed.”
“Can we sleep with you?” Lexi moved towards me, patting Holden’s leg. Holden’s sobs had eased, but tears were still falling down her face. I rubbed her back, my nose dipping into her hair.
“I have to go out, Lexi, but you can sleep with Holden until I get back, okay? Protect her for me?”
All three of the pups nodded. Soren and Betta shifted back into kids and ran inside to get back into their pajamas, while Lexi followed me as I walked my mate to our bed. I took off her shoes and pulled off her jeans, tucking her under the covers. Lexi jumped up to cuddle on one side of her.