by E M Lindsey
“Jonas?”
He scoffed and laid back, taking another drink. “This is a good place, like you said, and I don’t want to be here like some TV movie villain coming to ruin Christmas or whatever. You know? Today, I went out to see the property with that park ranger…”
“Ronan.”
Jonas closed his eyes and failed at not thinking about Ronan’s soft eyes, or the way he was careful with Jonas even when he didn’t need to be. Ronan was married to a man Jonas couldn’t begin to understand, but he did know that he wanted, and that was a problem. “I saw how much this town means to him. I saw how much it means to everyone, and I don’t want to ruin that.”
Brad sighed and sat up, setting his half-gone beer down by his feet. “You do what you gotta do, Jonas. People get that.”
“I don’t want everyone to hate me.” His voice was small, and it was a ridiculous thing to say because he was going to be gone in a few weeks, and their opinion of him shouldn’t matter.
Brad was silent for a long time, then he shook his head and reached out to touch Jonas’ knee. “I bet you need sleep.”
And that was the truth, but Jonas wasn’t sure he’d manage it. All the same, he let Brad help him off the bench, and he let himself feel the faint, simmering buzz under his skin as he took a few steps toward the pool gate.
“Are you going to be okay?” Brad asked.
Jonas let out a small laugh and shrugged. “Probably.”
Brad got him to the path which led toward the suites, then stopped him with a hand on his arm. “How about a little hike tomorrow? Get your mind off things.”
Jonas wasn’t quite sure how he deserved a friend like Brad, but he was going to take it where it was offered. “Meet you after breakfast.”
“Perfect,” Brad said with a smile and let Jonas go.
The walk back to his room was quiet, the sounds of the late night forest a little bit alien, but he felt something comforting in the darkness as he slipped into his room and began to undress. He was buzzing from the beer, but more than that he felt a little off kilter still from being utterly consumed by Parker and Ronan, and he laid on the bed and tried not to remember the way they’d stared at him just before he left.
He could still feel the echo of Ronan’s body against his, as the ATV rumbled across the gravel toward the lake. The area was gorgeous, but as much as Jonas had tried to pay attention, he couldn’t stop staring at the ranger. Ronan’s feet dragged when he walked, and his grip lacked strength, but there was an overwhelming power that poured out of him, and Jonas wanted to lean in and taste it.
He had never felt this way before. Married men, straight men, curious men—they’d always been off limits to him, because although he had never considered relationships to be for him, he still needed to protect his heart as best as he could.
But he also recognized that look of simmering want in their eyes—like he was something forbidden and wrong, but they wanted him anyway. It was just a flash, just a second, but he was no fool. His inexperience didn’t prevent him from knowing when someone might have been willing.
Jonas was an unwilling town-wrecker, but he wasn’t a home-wrecker. He allowed himself this moment of fantasy as he lay there on the bed, but that was all. It wouldn’t hurt anyone now, when he pictured Ronan’s full lips pressing against his, a hot tongue invading his mouth as Parker dragged slender fingers along his spine.
Jonas reached beneath the waistband of his boxers and curled his hand around his cock as he pictured Parker pressing up behind him, sharp teeth at his pulse point. “You like that?” he’d ask, the lilt in his accent soft in his ear. “You want more? You want my husband to suck you?”
Jonas let out a moan, the sound of it so loud, it nearly startled him out of the fantasy, but the Parker and Ronan in his head were too strong to let go so easily. He began to stroke, holding tight, twisting at the head, letting his foreskin do most of the work as it slid with his fist. His body shuddered as Ronan’s face appeared, his eyes heavy-lidded and peering up at him as his mouth swallowed Jonas down to the base of his dick.
Parker’s deep voice rumbled a laugh against the back of his shoulder, and he imagined the thick head of his cock nudging at his opening. “You want us, don’t you, Jonas?”
And god, he did. More than he had ever wanted anything. His mouth parted on a sharp gasp as he thought about how wide he’d stretch on Parker’s cock, how slick it would be with too much lube, how he’d dig his fingers into Jonas’ hip and thrust up into him, rocking his entire body.
And Ronan would move with it, his mouth still sucking, his nails drawing faint lines up his thighs. Jonas knew Parker’s strength would hold him and bounce him on his lap and drag out the most vicious, wild orgasm he’d ever experience in his life.
If only he could have it.
If only this could be real.
He came with a shout, his hips stuttering up as the fabric of his boxers caught most of his release. It smeared along his hand, and his breathing hitched sharply in his chest as he started to come down, and he blinked up at the ceiling. He was surrounded again, by emptiness, by darkness. Ronan and Parker were in their home, probably wrapped around each other, loving each other more than Jonas would probably ever know.
He was torn between vicious envy and gratitude because men like them deserved it. He had been nothing but a shy coward who had never had the strength to stand up for himself. His accomplishments were overshadowed and secret, and it was hard to feel like he deserved anything at all when he could never find the ability to speak up for what was right.
So he had this—this fantasy, and it would have to be enough.
Jonas was halfway through his coffee when he heard a soft groan and a man joined him at the table. He glanced over to see Brad, who looked exhausted but was smiling as he set his coffee down and winked at Jonas. “Hung over?”
Jonas almost laughed. “Two beers? I’m not that bad.”
Brad shrugged. “I never drink, so two beers would do me in. Did you eat?”
Gesturing at the empty plate at the edge of the table, he nodded. He’d gotten up early to have some fruit and a bagel, and then had worked a little bit on his action plan so Peter wouldn’t blow up his phone with angry calls about how long he was taking. It didn’t seem to matter how quickly Jonas worked though, Peter would never be satisfied.
“I wasn’t very hungry. I had a ton of work this morning, and it’s only going to get worse.” He stopped, feeling bad for complaining to a man who was going to be directly impacted by Peter’s presence in Cherry Creek if he was unsuccessful at getting the man to re-sell, but Brad didn’t look angry.
Instead, he offered Jonas a sympathetic smile, then slapped his thighs and stood. “You ready to get out of here?”
“Yeah. I mean, if you’re not too busy.”
“Nah. My boyfriend’s going to be busy with stuff all day, and Charlie kicked me out of the office.” Brad waited for Jonas to swallow the last of his coffee, then he led him through a long corridor and out a side door that was marked Emergency Exit with a broken alarm.
The door opened immediately to a concrete path which ended a few steps ahead at a rocky trail, and Brad led the way under a small canopy of trees. The morning sun was warm, promising heat to the summer day, but it was a welcome change from the oppressive, choking heat of the Arizona desert.
“It’s gorgeous out here,” Jonas breathed out as he looked through the flecks of light that winked through the leaves. “This is all the hotel property?”
“Here it is, yeah,” Brad told him. “This leads to the small lake, and I think there was a dam here like way before my dad bought this place. Whatever it was, it was torn down, but some natural springs feed it now. It’s really peaceful. I sit out there when I’m having bad nights.”
Jonas knew all about those and all about those quiet, safe spaces that made him feel like the world wasn’t falling apart under his feet. “Well, it’s a lot fucking nicer than where I live.”
&n
bsp; “Where’s that?” Brad asked, pulling back a tree branch and letting Jonas pass him on the narrow path. It didn’t look deliberate, more like a place that had been formed by people walking over the years.
“Scottsdale. Arizona,” he clarified when Brad frowned. “Well, my offices are there. My house is just outside the city in the middle of nowhere. I love having no neighbors, but the place is still a hellish desert where nothing grows green except plants covered in thorns that want to kill you.”
Brad laughed with his whole body, and Jonas loved that about him. He was a reserved sort of man, but he was also a genuine one, and those were damn rare in his life. “Sounds terrible.”
“I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone. I’d love to get the hell out one day. I was supposed to go to the University of Washington when I graduated high school, but staying there was easier.”
Brad paused in his step and gave Jonas a careful look. “Not your choice, I’m guessing?”
Jonas bit his lip and shook his head. “I tried, but getting Peter to be reasonable is like trying to move a mountain.”
“Your dad?” Brad asked, and Jonas nodded. “I’m sorry. I hate that feeling of no control.”
That sounded raw—maybe not fresh, but like a wound that hadn’t healed properly. A bone that never quite set right. “Me too. Anyway, I don’t always get to travel to places I like with this job, so this is nice.”
He fell quiet when the path opened up to the shores of a small lake. The water was clear, the stones shining bright under the shallow waters. It looked cold and inviting, and he wanted to dive in.
“It’s amazing,” he breathed.
“Yeah. It’s not the same as the big lake.” Brad said as he led Jonas over to a collection of boulders.
Jonas grunted softly as he pulled himself up to sit, and his gaze trailed lazily along the tree line. “It doesn’t have the same feeling as here,” he admitted. “But it was nice. It might have partly been the company though.”
“Ronan?” Brad asked, blinking in surprise.
Jonas felt his cheeks flush from his fantasy the night before, but he didn’t think Brad would be able to read that quiet, simmering guilt from his expression. “Yeah. He was nice.”
Brad chuckled and raised a brow at him. “I’ve heard him called a lot of things. Nice usually isn’t one of them.”
Jonas bristled then, though he didn’t know why because it was true. Ronan hadn’t gone out of his way to be cruel, but there was nothing friendly about their meeting. Jonas was an imposition—he was the rich man without a heart coming to ruin everything. But he felt protective anyway. He felt like Ronan deserved more credit.
“You should meet his husband,” Brad said when Jonas didn’t respond. “Parker? He’s the only doctor here in town.”
Jonas laughed softly, feeling his body rise with a blush. “Yeah. I ran into them at dinner at No Cilantro. He and Ronan are showing me around the Farmer’s Market.”
Brad looked started. “Seriously?”
“I think they’re trying to…size me up? Intimidate me?”
“If it was just Ronan,” Brad said, “I’d say there’s no way. But Parker’s…” Brad trailed off with a faint hum.
“Yeah.” Jonas shrugged. “He was charismatic.”
“That’s one word for it. He volunteered to help with the Easter Egg Hunt this year and hid the golden egg,” Brad closed his eyes like the story pained him. “He put his arm between two tree branches and stuck the egg in the palm.”
“His…” and then Jonas realized what he was talking about. “Oh my god, like his…”
“Prosthetic arm,” Brad said flatly. “Yeah. All the kids are used to him by now, so they thought it was great fun, but the parents weren’t super thrilled and asked us to universally ban him from being able to help out with public events.”
Jonas tried not to laugh, but he couldn’t help it, and he covered his face with both hands. “Why is that the worst thing I’ve ever heard?”
“Because he’s the worst,” Brad said, and when Jonas looked up, he was grinning softly. “He’s a good guy though, and they have good instincts.”
Jonas couldn’t help a soft shudder. “That’s what I’m worried about. I’m not the good guy here.”
Brad shook his head, his eyes soft. “Just let them get to know you.”
Jonas licked his lips, then sighed and stared out across the lake. “Why are you so nice to me?”
Brad grinned and nudged him with his knee. “I spent a lot of my life being hyper vigilant—paying really close attention to people. I don’t like not knowing who people are, so I got really good at being able to read strangers.” He fell quiet a moment, and Jonas waited for him. “You’re a good guy. I don’t think this land deal has to be a disaster, and I don’t think it’ll be bad for the town. I’m hoping they get the chance to realize that.”
“That’s my goal, but I can’t guarantee that,” Jonas admitted softly. “I always do my best, but it’s out of my hands once my dad signs those papers.” He curled his knees up toward his chest and hugged them. “I wish you and your brothers had out bid him. I wish anyone had outbid him.”
“We didn’t try,” Brad told him. “None of us even considered it. We weren’t ready to expand, and your dad moved fast and quiet.”
Jonas bowed his head and tried not to look as defeated as he felt. “I really am sorry. For, you know, whatever happens.”
Brad reached over and squeezed his shoulder. “It’s not you. So…forgiven.”
Chapter Fourteen
Jonas was nervous—like, on a date sort of nervous. He spent too long in front of his mirror and left a massive pile of rejected outfits on his bed. He wanted to impress both Parker and Ronan, to show the best side of himself so he had at least some chance at winning them over to his side, because he couldn’t undermine Peter without help. Right now, he was short of ideas, but he wasn’t out of hope. Yet.
The first thing he needed to do was to tell them that he wasn’t the one running the company, and that everything he did was an attempt to stop Peter from bulldozing all the trees and throwing up an outdoor mall or expensive townhomes to fuck over property values. Peter did know enough Hamptons assholes to buy up the property and then throw it on vacation rental websites. He knew exactly how the market inflated and made it difficult—if not impossible—for people to afford their own property taxes. He’d spent years watching Peter do it to town after town.
Peter had driven people to sell, then swooped on the listings, and turned small towns inside out. He’d do it again here, if Jonas couldn’t stop him, and the thought made his stomach twist on itself.
The thought of causing Ronan and Parker that kind of pain was almost too much, and it was not a great place for him to be in. He’d never gotten attached before, so it was a new feeling, and he wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. He’d let himself fantasize outside of his own self-created hell, and he didn’t know how to go back. He wasn’t sure he wanted to. He finished getting ready, staring at his reflection, which is the best it would ever really be, and then he grabbed his things and headed out the door.
Brad told him the Farmer’s Market was within walking distance, but he took his car anyway and found parking near the small City Hall offices. When he stepped out, he could smell kettle corn and fried sweets and faint music from around the corner. The sun had just begun to set over the horizon, and the walkway was lit with yellow lamps, a faint glow painting the sidewalk with glowing haze.
Making his way around the corner, Jonas saw the market come into view just as he passed the firehouse, and he stopped to take it in. He was met with a sea of white tents open in the front to reveal tables and banners, each spread lined with hand-crafted food and trinkets. It was like every citizen in Cherry Creek had a stake there at the market, and yet the paths were teeming with people who had to be from places far outside of the small town.
Jonas itched to look around, to get lost in the quiet vibe of relaxed people, but he
kept his focus on the task at hand. Ronan had sent a text the night before to let him know he and Parker would be waiting for him at the frozen lemonade stand. Jonas had been too shaken to reply with anything other than a quick ‘okay’ because he feared somehow they would know what he’d thought of when he touched himself. Somehow, they’d be able to read between the lines and be able to tell that their names had been on his lips when he spilled all over his hand.
It was an absurd thought, but Jonas wasn’t sure his brain was getting along very well with logic at the moment. His hands had a faint tremble he was barely able to control, but he breathed through the anxiety and scanned the crowd until he found a small stand with a giant lemon sign boasting a long line of people waiting for drinks.
Jonas’ heart hammered in his chest as he saw the pair waiting for him. Ronan was seated on the bench with a set of crutches on either side of him, and Parker was behind on the tabletop, bracketing Ronan’s shoulders with his thighs. Ronan had slushy lemonade in his hand, and every so often, he’d lift the spoon over his head and feed his husband.
Jonas took a moment—a selfish, envious moment—to watch them. They were gorgeous together, nothing alike and yet moving as if they had been together for every second of their lives. His heart twisted when Ronan leaned back and rested his head in the crook of Parker’s hip, and Parker’s hand drifted to his hair.
After a beat, he took a breath and forced himself to keep going until he reached the edge of where they were sitting. Ronan’s eyes were on him first, narrowed and suspicious, Parker looking a little bit easier, but Jonas knew he was being sized up. He felt young and childish in his ripped jeans and t-shirt, his hair a mess, his shoes scuffed. But he needed that, needed to peel away the layers of suits and button-ups that weren’t him at all.