by Tammi Lynn
Contents
Description
Dedication
Acknowledgements
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
*Bonus Scene*
Tammi Lynn
Copyright © Tammi Lynn, 2019. All rights reserved.
No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, events or locales is purely coincidental. The characters are products of the author’s imagination and used fictitiously.
Description
Contemporary RH
What do you get when you write up a Harem Wanted ad as a joke? Add in a crazy best friend at work who decides to submit, said ad, behind your back?
You get me, Sydney Wade. Almost thirty, single, and now the owner of a phone that has gotten over fifty messages from random guys in the span of twenty-four hours. I’m going to kill Jade. That ad was never supposed to get published.
Did I mention I work at the Helena Herald? That’s right, Assistant Editor to the Chief Editor and owner of the paper, my boss Bose, at the very newspaper my wanted ad was published. Let’s just say the boss man isn’t too happy about it.
Anyways, even with my already busy life, I decided to go ahead and go on a few dates. What could it hurt, right? We’ll see how they go. Who knows, maybe I’ll have someone in time to take home for Christmas dinner? Maybe a whole harem of men? A girl can dream.
Dedication
Dedication of this Holiday book goes to my Grandma Arlene Cloud in Heaven. I’m not positive if you’d like my books, mom says you’d be flabbergasted, but I say since you had nine kids I think I’m okay. Living in the house now, that I grew up visiting you in for Christmas has me missing you more than ever. Your laugh and the smell of your baking cookies and making peanut butter balls no longer comes from the kitchen, and you’re not kicking my ass at yahtzee. I love you Grandma, and I hope you get to dance in the daisies with Grandpa for your 71st anniversary on the 27th.
Acknowledgements
This book was thought up on a whim after a conversation with my PA Sarah, on how I need to find my very own Harem. I mean wouldn’t it be funny to put out an ad? See how many bites you get? Yeah, in book land it could work. Real life? Not so much. Thank you Sarah for keeping my mind running and dreaming and pushing me to stay positive and focused when my mind goes from one fantasy land to the next.
A big thank you to all my Queens and Kings in Tammi’s Tiaras, you guys have been amazing, your positivity and response has me wanting to write more and more to come. To Jennifer Perkins, Marjolein Van Laere, and Rebecca Cardenas-Cook, thank you for telling me your own ‘date gone bad’ stories. You had me cracking up and even though I changed things around you guys were a huge inspiration in the process of writing this book.
Once again my Bish, Morgan, gets a huge thank you! You’re an amazing mentor and are always there when I need any help or do sprints with me to get more words written. Not to mention another huge thank you for creating the amazing cover for Harem Wanted. I gave you the ideas of what I wanted and you fucking rocked it!
Chapter One
Thanksgiving...
“So, Sydney.” My bitch of a step mom dabs at her lips with a cloth napkin. “You’re going to be turning thirty here in a few months and still showing up to the holidays without a man. My girls are barely twenty-three and have already found husbands.” She gestures to the twins sitting across the table from me, not even trying to hide their giggles. Bitches. “When are you going to bring someone home for the holidays?” When I damn well feel like it. Or manage to get a boyfriend, but whatever, I’m tired of this question. “It’s Thanksgiving now, maybe by Christmas?” Damn she’s pushy. You would think her comments were attempts at misplaced concern and affection. They weren’t. She was just mean.
Every single time I come home for a holiday or sit down for a family dinner, my step mom always throws it in my face that I’m single. So I’m almost thirty and single, who cares?! I just haven’t found a guy yet that has all of what I’m looking for. I’ve told her this but she still persists in trying to drive me up a wall.
“Patricia, let her be, I’m sure that she will bring someone around when it is the right person.” My dad gives me a small smile from his seat at the head of the table and it calms the temper that was starting to rise inside me. I love my dad, and he has to be the sweetest guy alive. It’s not his fault that after my mom died when I was sixteen, the equivalent of a disney villain or wicked witch, decided to ensnare him in one of her evil spells.
“I’ve been busy with work. Remember I got that promotion from copy editor to personal assistant to the Chief Editor and owner of the newspaper? It’s been a lot more work and hours than I’m used too.” Why did I feel like I was making excuses to this woman? It’s been more hours, but I’ve also been keeping myself busy, working out, hanging out with friends, and doing anything and everything I can outdoors. I don’t like being alone, but also being a dating pariah, I never get asked out. I tried to not take it personally but maybe I just didn’t give off the right ‘vibe’? I didn’t think I had a resting bitch face… did I?
“That’s nice dear, but you know if you found a nice husband you wouldn’t have to work anymore. You could settle down and have us a few grandchildren.” My dad’s eyes light up at the mention of grand children and it breaks my heart. I don’t even know if I want kids, they’ve just never been a thought into my future. And what if I don’t want a ‘nice’ husband? I don’t want vanilla, I prefer rocky road, something a little more daring, a little more pleasing to my tongue.
The part of what she said that bothered me the most though was not working. I love my job and could never quit. I swear it doesn’t have anything to do with my hot as fuck boss either. I sincerely love my job and seeing the words we print coming alive on the Helena Herald’s daily paper was unbelievably satisfying. “I’m not interested in leaving my job.”
She’s about to come back with a retort when my dad takes pity on me and butts in. “So, what have you been up to lately, Syd? I saw those pictures you posted on facegram the other day. The ones of you skiing? I liked all of them.” My sweet old’ dad just started getting into the tech and social media world, and his posts and replies have been comical lately in their innocence. Also, I wasn’t going to correct him about the ‘facegram’ term, I actually felt like it really encompassed Facebook and Instagram nicely.
“Yep, that was last weekend. Jade, Knox, and I went up to Great Divide, and had a blast. We’re planning on going again soon and have a cabin trip planned too.”
“You still see Knoxley? That’s who was in the pictures? He’s changed.” He has changed. I’ve known Knox the longest out of all my friends, having met in the third grade and my dad probably hasn’t seen him since we graduated high school. That lanky teen has turned into a built, blonde, curly, and shaggy haired, pothead of a hot as fuck man. Don’t ask me how he got the body with his extracurricular activities, I mean he’s the laziest fucker I know unless we drag him out, but damn. He has to be hitting the gym sometimes. My childhood friend has turned into someone I dream about and I can’t even tell him or act on it. I don’t want to lose the friendship we have.
<
br /> “That was him, I see him all the time. I’ll have to bring him over someday.”
“You do that baby, It would be nice to see the troublemaker again.” Yeah, so we got into a lot of trouble in our teen years. Knox was always trying to get me to sneak out and go to parties. Me being the dutiful friend, I always followed. So many good memories. Even though we’ve kept our relationship purely to friends, he was still my first kiss. I’ll always remember that kiss but I would love like a million more to see him naked. Well there was that one time I accidently walked in on him coming out of the shower, but you know just saying, wouldn’t mind seeing more..
After dinner I say my goodbyes to my family and head out, opting to not sit and watch football with my dad and brothers in law or sit and talk with my step mom and twin step sisters. They’re evil I tell you! The twins, Mercedes and Portia, used to always pull pranks on me. They hate me. The hate is mutually reciprocated though, the brats have been a thorn in my side since they were married into the family. The worst was when they put bleach in my shampoo, tie dying my long and wavy brown locks with a rusty orange color, when I was seventeen. They were only eleven then and already being molded to perfection in their mother’s image. I cried until my dad took me to the salon to dye it back.
The bitch did have me thinking on the drive home. In all reality I do want to find someone. I’m surrounded by hot guys all the time, and sure I really like all of them, but I’m not sure if they’re all of what I’m looking for. Plus none of them have bothered to ask me out. Yet. I’m working on that. Greedy and spoiled rotten by my daddy, I want more. If I could just find a guy that is everything I’m looking for in one man. I want a guy who’s loving, caring, protective, and yes, a little rough around the edges too, a freak in the sheets, and a little dom. I want someone who won’t try and tame me but will love me and let me be myself.
Shit, if I can’t find all of that in one guy, I’m down for having a few men, each with a trait I crave. I need a harem of guys. Wouldn’t that be the life? My cousin in Washington found herself a harem of men, fucking hot ones too. Even though I say I want a guy, I still never really pictured myself getting married. So that could be perfect for me. My mind is going crazy with images of that future.
I do work at a newspaper. Wouldn’t that be funny if I put out an ad? Harem Wanted. I could list everything I’m looking for in a guy. Sounds like a good idea but I could never do it. No way.
Pulling up to my house, I still can’t get the images of a life with multiple men out of my head. I know a few guys I wish could be in that picture.
I love my house. I actually make really good money at the Herald, and when I got the promotion six months ago, it only took me a month to buy my dream house and move out of the crappy apartment I’d been living in since I graduated college. The house was a big purchase for me, I’m big on saving and having a substantial amount in the bank to keep me living the life I love. I’m actually proud of myself for finishing college and becoming as successful as I am, I don’t really need anyone but myself and can support myself financially. What I want is a whole different conversation.
When I walk inside I’m greeted by my three year old Siamese cat, Panda. She rubs against my jeans doing figure eights around my legs and meowing. Panda loves to talk, a lot. When I saw her in an ad for the local shelter I fell in love and went and adopted her. She makes things a lot less lonely in this big house.
I had actually had my eye on this house for a year. It had been for sale for a little more than that and I had been warring with myself on whether or not to buy it. I could have the moment it went on the market but I have a hard time spending so much money at once. A lot of people thought I would just live off my dad’s money, he’s a pretty popular defense lawyer, and has always given me everything I ever wanted. Instead it made me want to be able to do all that for myself, to get anything I want under my own name and money. I haven’t asked him for anything since I graduated college and started my job at the Herald. I was mainly a clerk back then, answering phones and filing.
Even then I loved my job, and it has been the best experience growing and moving up the ranks. I even met my new best and crazy bish there, Jade. Jade, who just happens to be laying on my couch snuggled in a blanket with duck slippers sticking out and off the end of the couch. Her hair is done up in two mickey mouse buns and her yellow glasses are faced towards the TV. She looks like she lives here. She doesn’t by the way. I have this two story, four bedroom victorian all to myself.
“Jade, what are you doing here?” I gave her one of my extra keys for emergencies, but this is the first time she’s used it to my knowledge. I don’t mind, I trust her, but I’m still curious as to why she’s here.
“Internet’s out at my house and I need my flix. You don’t mind if I stay right? She puts on a pitiful look and I laugh.
“That’s fine. I’m beat though so going to head up to bed.” It’s been a long day. Even with it being Thanksgiving I still had to go into work for a few hours to help out my boss on some last minute black friday ads that needed to be featured in tomorrows friday paper. That man can call me into work anytime, day or not.
Two years ago Bose Grady took over the paper for his father and I’ve had a secret crush on him ever since. Tall dark and broody he always has a scowl on his face. It doesn’t take away any beauty from the man, if anything it makes my blood boil and my thighs clench everytime he calls me into his office. This promotion and getting to be his assistant has been the highlight of my year. Getting to see his face and toned body in his black suits everyday is something I look forward too.
“Night Syd.” Jade goes back to watching her shows, and after grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge I head upstairs.
There’s foor rooms upstairs and they’re all pretty large but my master suite is my favorite. It’s huge, and my queen sized bed with a satin red comforter looks small in the open space. There’s a fireplace in one corner where I installed my tv above and an alcove with huge bay windows that reach from the ceiling down to the cushioned window seat that curves around the space. I have a walk in closet, and my bathroom is to die for. A standing shower encased with glass and is tiled all in black, is in one corner, I may have done a few remodels when I first bought the place, and added a bench seat too. I didn’t touch the detached tub. Antique and deep enough for the water to cover my tits and knees, the gold footed tub is one of my favorite parts of the house and I’m almost tempted to take a bath now. Something to soothe my mind.
I don’t though, instead I remove my jeans and throw them into the hamper and crawl into bed in just my shirt and underwear. Grabbing my notebook and favorite pen I open it up to where I last left off. I love writing, and hope to someday have my very own story printed in the paper. I’ll get there. Every night I open up this regular old black and white composition notebook and enter my thoughts or stories for the day, and sometimes in my downtime at work. I know writing on my laptop would be easier but I love how it feels to put pen on paper, must be all those years growing up keeping a journal.
I’m at a blank tonight on what I should write. Images of a harem still dancing through my mind, I write down only four names. My imaginary harem, that I would love to have if I could. What the heck, I’m going to write up a fake ad for fun.
Tearing a page from the back of the notebook, I close it and place the paper on top to write. This isn’t something I want saved inside.
Harem Wanted:
I’m looking for a few guys that don’t mind sharing and who each have a quality in what I’m looking for in a man.
1. Like I said before, must be willing to share, and be okay with other guys around. Sharing is caring!
2. I need a sweetheart, someone to cuddle up on the couch with and will listen to everything I have to say.
3. Someone who is caring, who wants to take care of me even though I’m fully capable of taking care of myself.
4. I need a funny guy, someone who can make me laugh and make ba
d days go away with a smile.
5. A freak in the sheets, someone who can boss me around a little and play rough. I love to play.
6. Take me out on dates and woo me, a girl needs a little romance in her life.
If you possess any of these qualities and want to join my love harem of men send me a text and tell me a little about yourself. The number is 406-555-4936 and I’ll be waiting for your response.
Looking down at the paper and reading my notes, I can’t help but laugh. If I could only actually submit it to the wanted ads I’d be set and could maybe find a few guys to keep me home more and, fully, entertained.
Panda comes through my slightly open door and jumps up on the bed with me to curl on the pillow beside mine. I add one more number to my list.
7. Must love cats.
Chapter Two
I’m never late for work, have always been at least twenty minutes early every day since I’ve started working. Punctual and bright eyed, I am not today. I forgot to plug my phone in last night before going to bed so it died and I had no alarm to wake me up. Already ten minutes late, I jump out of bed and take a quick shower. Throwing on a tight black pencil skirt I add a white short sleeved button up shirt with a black and red striped tie, I throw the ridiculous ad back in between the pages of my notebook and cram it into my leather shoulder satchel.
Rushing out the door I’m now forty minutes late and it’ll take me at least fifteen minutes to drive to work. Fuck. I really hate being late and after I plugged in my phone while I was in the shower, I turn it on now to find six text messages and numerous missed calls making me cringe. Four texts are from Bose, wondering where I am and telling me to get the fuck into work, and two from Jade, who come to think of it could have woken me up before she left this morning. Her texts have me worried.
Queen Jade: You done fucked up girl. You have awaken the beast! Get here, Now!