Bobbi and Soul

by J. B. Marsden

  Chapter Twenty-five

  “Come in, Mother Erin.” Bishop Margaret Stanhope’s aide led Erin into the bishop’s swank office overlooking a busy street in Denver a few blocks from Colfax. “The bishop is still in her meeting but will be here shortly. Can I get you something? Coffee? Soda?”

  “Diet pop, please. Thanks, Brett.” Erin exhaled. Brett brought her a Diet Pepsi and a glass of ice. She sipped her drink and prayed silently, breathing deeply. It wasn’t that she was nervous as much as uncertain about how the meeting would help her.

  She looked over the books on the bishop’s shelf, the usual theology books and references. The bishop’s icon collection crowded the entire wall opposite the large windows looking down on the street. Erin walked around, checking the different saints and styles of icons on the wall, enrapt by the bishop’s treasures.

  “Sorry, Erin. Meeting ran late.” The bishop, a medium-height woman in her late fifties, with silver and brown short hair, rushed in with a breezy greeting and hugged her. “How you doing?” she asked as she and Erin took chairs directly across from each other.

  “I think you can guess why I’m here.” Erin went right into the discussion, hoping it was the right tactic with her busy bishop.

  Bishop Stanhope grinned. “Let’s start with a short prayer, huh?” The bishop reached out and grabbed Erin’s hand. “Gracious and loving God, we thank you for the faithful witness of all our gay, lesbian, trans, and bi priests in this diocese, but especially for the ministry of your servant Erin. May you continue the good work you have begun in her. Amen.”

  Margaret sat back and said straightforwardly, “Now, how can we get this parish to treat you with respect? How can we get them to recognize you as a person in your own right, whose love counts just as much as your parishioners’ do?”

  Erin, taken aback by the bishop’s quick assessment of her problem, said, “Thank you, Bishop. That’s my problem exactly. How? Those three parishioners are the leaders of the parish. Have been for decades.” Erin conjured up in her mind the images of steely faced Walter.

  “But who are the new leaders?”

  “The new leaders?”

  “The ones who are coming up the leadership ranks, who know you and like you just the way you are. Those are the ones you need in your corner. They will help put the others in their place.” The bishop raised her hand. “Don’t look at me like that. Your parish system contains progressive genes. I’ve known Holy Spirit parish for many years. They’ve led the diocese in refugee ministry since the 1990s. They’ve done many ministries with children of addicts in the past and are working now with other youth. You’ve got good underpinnings at Holy Spirit.”

  This news surprised Erin. “I didn’t know.”

  “Oh, yes.” Margaret smiled wisely. “They need only to remember who they are to come around, my friend.”

  They talked of tactics, of meetings Erin could convene, with the new leaders in control. The bishop gave her ideas for going forward with a plan, and by the end of the half-hour meeting, Erin felt buoyed and energized. She had a plan, with the bishop’s blessing.

  When Erin arrived home, she immediately called her parish leader, Charlotte Stephens, to meet her for coffee the next morning.

  ****

  “Hi, cutie,” Bobbi entered Erin’s house the next evening, tossed her coat on the sofa, and kissed and hugged her.

  “Hey, yourself.” Erin giggled. “You look like a drowned puppy.”

  “I forgot my umbrella this morning. It was bright and sunny. Who thought I would need one this evening?”

  “You’re on call at eight?” Erin brought a pot of hot tea to the living room with two cups. “Sugar and milk, right?”

  Bobbi sat and stirred her tea. “I assume I’m here because you have news.”

  “I do.” Erin smiled enigmatically. “I met with the bishop. I’ve begun my campaign against the homophobes in my parish.”

  “Wow. That’s fast work. I knew you were a Mighty Mouse.” Bobbi grinned wickedly.

  “Shush, now. The bishop advised me to get the good guys from Holy Spirit solidly in my corner, so I’m having a meeting tomorrow night with the leaders of my parish, some of whom have been in Arizona for the winter. They’re all back home now and I have enough support to remove the stipulation on my contract.”

  “You do? That’s great.” Bobbi took Erin’s hand and stroked her knuckles.

  Erin could barely keep her energy in. “Yeah. I want you to come to the meeting.”

  Bobbi gulped the hot tea and coughed.

  Erin patted her back. “You all right?”

  Bobbi rasped out, “I’m fine. Whew. Better.” She finally caught her breath. “Geez, Erin. Do you think that’s wise? What do you want to accomplish by me being there?”

  “I thought it would be easier if there were a name and face of the person I’m dating. It’s harder to reject a real person than an idea.”

  “Oh.” Bobbi looked skeptical.

  Erin didn’t expect this reaction from her. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to come. I’d understand. It’s a lot to ask. You’ll be outed to my whole parish.”

  “That doesn’t bother me. I think by now lots of folks know who I am. Some little kid pointed me out to her mother at the clinic the other day and asked if I was the gay doctor.” Bobbi chuckled.

  “Oh, God, no.” Erin covered her mouth with her hands. She grinned but said, “I’m so sorry, sweetie.” She took Bobbi into her arms. “We’re surrounded by stupid, straight people.”

  Bobbi drew back from a hug and kissed Erin tenderly. “I’ll do whatever you think is best, Mother Erin.”

  “Okay, tomorrow night at six. Be here or be…queer.” They both laughed, but Erin couldn’t tell if Bobbi laughed from amusement or from nerves. She realized it was a lot to ask of the church-phobic doctor.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  “Welcome, everybody,” Erin said to the assembled group of seven sitting on the couch and dining room chairs gathered in the living room at the vicarage.

  Charlotte, the same woman she’d spent time with in the hospital when she’d had pneumonia several weeks ago, sat the closest to her, as the parish’s leader. On Charlotte’s right were the two negative parishioners, Helen and Walter, whose stipulations the rest of the vestry had agreed to for Erin’s contract. Allies of Erin’s, Mike and Jennifer, sat across from them. The group rounded out with two people Erin considered neutral, Clarice and Tom. She wished she knew them better; nevertheless, her interactions with them in the year since she’d been hired had been positive. She just wasn’t sure where they stood on the issue of her sexuality.

  Bobbi sat with a stoic face on Erin’s left, looking definitely outside her comfort zone. Erin squeezed her hand.

  “I’ve called this meeting because I want to be up front with you about my personal life. I’d like to introduce my girlfriend, Dr. Roberta Webster.” Erin watched carefully as everyone reacted.

  Helen and Walter gasped.

  Mike smiled at Erin, then at Bobbi, and said, “Welcome to our meeting, Dr. Webster.”

  Clarice smiled, but Tom’s smile was tight and didn’t reach his eyes.

  Jennifer, however, rose from her chair, clasped Bobbi’s hand, and said warmly, “Great to meet you, Dr. Webster.”

  Charlotte took over the meeting. “We’re here tonight to discuss the special clause in Mother Erin’s contract that we signed one year ago. I want us to decide tonight whether to retain it or strike it and sign another contract.” Charlotte sat primly and looked each person in the eye. “Everyone will have a turn to express their stance. I, for one, am against the current contract we negotiated about Mother Erin remaining celibate. I don’t believe we should treat any class of person with a different set of rules. I abide by my baptismal covenant to respect the dignity of every human being and I don’t believe it is respectful to treat Mother Erin’s love as less than anyone else’s.”

  Walter shook his head. “Her lifestyle is an ab
omination to God and I’ll show you right in the bible where it says that. We hired this young woman, thinking her behavior would remain chaste. That she would not practice her deviant lifestyle while a priest in our midst. I don’t think we need to change one damn thing. I abide by Jesus’s stance of loving the sinner but hating the sin and she should remain celibate. She owes us that, since we were open enough to hire her in the first place.” He puffed out his cheeks, which had turned red, and crossed his arms on his chest. Next to him, Helen’s face remained a mask of distaste.

  Jennifer spoke up, “But, how can you be a Christian and say those things? Jesus never said anything at all about homosexuals. Mostly he preached for compassion, for not accumulating wealth, and for forgiveness. Love God, love your neighbor. That’s the message he taught. How can we treat Mother Erin with less respect?”

  “I agree with Jennifer,” Clarice said. Walter looked daggers at her. She ignored him. “I’ve been studying on this issue. Mother Erin is our first gay priest, but she’s not likely to be our last. I believe God made her just the way she is and God loves her, and we should, too.” Clarice returned Walter’s pointed stare.

  “Why, Clarice, how can you say that?” Helen said, her mouth looking like she’d sucked a lemon. “You know the bible says the homosexual lifestyle is an abomination before God. It’s not natural. God did not make people who love the same sex.”

  “I’ll tell you how I can say what I said, Helen. My own son came to out Stewart and me about three weeks ago. To tell us he was gay. He waited until college to act on his feelings and he’s dating now. I’ve never seen him happier, and Stewart and I are both happy for him. That’s how I can say what I said. Because I love my son no less than when he kept his secret. The poor guy had known all through high school he was gay and was afraid to tell us.” Clarice looked at each person pointedly. “How can I treat Mother Erin with disrespect when I love my own son, no matter what?”

  “I knew that boy was weird.” Walter pointed his finger at Clarice.

  Erin gasped, eyeing Walter in a new, less flattering light. Tonight, he was showing his true colors as a worse bigot than she’d thought.

  “Walter, I don’t care what you think. You’re stuck back in the ‘50s when all priests were men. It’s a new day. Get with the program.” Clarice’s face got red. She frowned at him. “Psychiatrists today say that being gay is not a mental illness. It’s not a lifestyle. It’s not something people choose.” She looked around the ring of people. “Who in God’s name would choose to be ostracized? To be an outcast to a whole group of bigots like you, Walter? Kip’s life was miserable until he could be himself. I’m just sorry it took him so long to tell us. Now Mother Erin just wants to love another person. I don’t think we should stand in her way. Jesus’s commandment at the Last Supper was to love others as he had loved us.”

  “I’ll tell you right now. If y’all change her contract, I’ll take my pledge and leave this church in a heartbeat.” Walter stood, his face scrunched with hate.

  “Please remain calm and seated, Walter,” Charlotte said.

  He lowered himself to the couch, but his pouting face made his point.

  “Blackmail is not pretty,” Mike said. “No one should get their way because they threaten to take away their pledge. I don’t believe that’s how churches are supposed to work. As the leaders of Holy Spirit parish, we should be listening to one another, not coming to snap judgements and pontificating our position as gospel truth.”

  “No one person rules our vestry.” Charlotte glared at Walter.

  The room got quiet. Walter’s cheeks still spouted red spots. Helen fidgeted with a hanky in her lap.

  Witnessing the conflict swirling around her, Erin breathed deeply, then spoke evenly and calmly. “I know this is a difficult issue for some of you. Please know that I will abide by whatever contract terms you decide upon. If you decide tonight not to change the contract, I will accept it. But, truthfully, I ask you to consider my situation as a human being who wants to love and be loved just like anyone else.”

  Helen puffed out her chest. “I do not believe in gay priests, to begin with. But two different gay priests applied for our position. There was nothing we could do. I’ve been heartsick from the beginning, I can tell you.” She sniffed into an embroidered hanky, then sat very straight, even regally.

  As Helen reminded Erin of Maggie Smith as the Dowager of Downton Abbey, she struggled to contain a grin.

  Helen continued in a huffy tone, with measured speech, “I’ve been a communicant of Holy Spirit church since the day I was born. I was baptized here. My parents were staunch members and generous supporters for forty years. My father was senior warden several times. My mother chaired the altar guild. I’ve chaired every committee at one time or another. You know I give more than most.” She looked smugly at Erin. “I don’t think I can continue to support you, Mother Erin, should you go against our policy. As I say, I have never believed in gay priests to begin with.”

  Tom spoke for the first time in the meeting. “What do you mean, you don’t believe in gay priests? They’re not unicorns, Helen! Mother Erin’s one of the best priests we’ve ever had. I’ve heard nothing but good feedback from other parishioners. Her sermons have lots of meat in ‘em. I hear her pastoral visits really help people, although I can’t speak from my own experience ‘cause I’ve not been in the hospital, knock on wood. She knows her stuff better than the last joker who was here, who read his sermons like they was a boring story. And they were. If you’re that unhappy, Helen, why’re ya still here?” Tom politely looked at Helen.

  “Well,” Helen huffed. She turned her head away from Tom.

  Tom added, looking at the group, “Not only is Mother Erin a great priest, she’s got us doing the things we used to do. Working with the children in the low-income housing across the street. Giving help to refugees and immigrants. Giving baskets to poor families at Christmas and Easter. I’m happy with her, and don’t care if she’s gay, or straight, or what.”

  “The poor should be working instead of sponging off churches. That’s another mark against her, as far as I’m concerned.” Walter pointed his finger at Tom.

  Tom shook his head. “I go with treating her like any other priest. I didn’t like the special clause in the first place. Any other priest would’ve just done their thing, whether married or not. I don’t think it’s right to treat Mother Erin any different.” Tom looked around and sat back in the walnut dining chair. “That’s all I have to say.”

  “I agree,” Clarice and Jennifer both spoke at once, then laughed lightly at the gaff.

  Mike added, “You can count me in as well. I voted ‘no’ on any special contract clause for that reason. Granted, single priests should show an example in their lives, but gay priests have only received the ability to marry in the last couple of years. I think as long as Mother Erin’s discreet, she should date like any other single priest. And Dr. Webster isn’t a parishioner, so Mother Erin isn’t doing anything wrong.”

  All but Helen and Walter were nodding their agreement with Mike.

  No one said anything more for some moments.

  Finally, Charlotte said, “Do any of you have any more comments about changing the contract?” She waited. “We’re going to take some moments of silence, to pray about this decision.”

  The room fell silent; they could only hear Walter’s heavy smokers’ wheeze.

  After three minutes, Charlotte broke the silence. “Are we ready?” She looked for confirmation to each person. “Then, as senior warden, I call the question. Should we change Mother Erin’s contract to exclude behavioral stipulations of celibacy?” Charlotte paused. “Those in favor, say aye.”

  Erin held her breath.

  “Aye,” all but Walter and Helen said.

  “Those opposed, nay.”

  Walter and Helen, together, said, “Nay.”

  “Are there any abstentions?”

  Silence.

  “It passes. We will o
fficially, as of today, remove the celibacy stipulation on Mother Erin’s contract. I will visit the attorney tomorrow and see to it.” Charlotte smiled and winked at Erin. “We love you, lady priest.” She patted Erin’s hand.

  Erin’s shoulders relaxed in relief. She hadn’t realized the depth of the parish’s caring for her.

  “Now, is there any other business?” Charlotte asked, looking around. Walter and Helen looked as if they had swallowed poison. “No? I declare this meeting adjourned.”

  Everyone rose from their chairs. Walter, stormy faced, walked directly up to Charlotte. “You’ll receive my written resignation tomorrow.” He huffed out the door.

  Helen, with pursed lips, grabbed her coat and slinked out after him.

  Clarice stepped to Erin. “You didn’t know about Kip’s coming out, did you?”

  “I didn’t. That was a brave thing you did tonight, Clarice. Thank you.” Erin hugged her.

  Clarice, with tears swimming in her eyes, replied, “I had no choice. I love you both.” She picked up her coat and put it on. Tom waved, said good-bye, and walked into the spring night behind Clarice.

  Jennifer, Mike, and Charlotte remained. They gathered around Erin and Bobbi.

  “I can’t thank you all enough for your support. I’m sorry about Walter’s resignation,” Erin said.

  “He’ll be back,” Mike said.

  “How can you be sure?” Jennifer asked.

  “Where else will he go? He loves all the rituals of the church. He’s been at Holy Spirit church since his family moved to Colorado in the 1960s. He won’t leave entirely. I predict he’ll be back for Easter.”

  Erin was skeptical. “That soon? I don’t know; it’s only two weeks away.”

  Bobbi hugged Erin from the side. “I don’t know exactly what happened tonight, but I felt you all support us in our relationship. Thank you.”

  “It’s great to see you with my underwear on, Dr. Webster.” Charlotte nudged her with her elbow, laughing.

  Bobbi’s eyes got wide, then she smiled. “Oh. Right. I seem to see when you’re wearing a patient gown, Mrs. Stephens.”