CHAPTER EIGHTEEN.
THE ART OF HARD LYING MADE EASY, THOUGH I AM MADE VERY UNEASY BY HARDLYING--I SEND MY RULER AS A MISSIVE, TO LET THE PARTIES CONCERNED KNOWTHAT I AM A REBEL TO TYRANNICAL RULE--I AM ARRAIGNED, TRIED, ANDCONDEMNED WITHOUT A HEARING--WHAT I LOSE IN SPEECH IS MADE UP INFEELING, THE WHOLE WOUND UP WITH MAGNANIMOUS RESOLVES, AND A LITTLESOBBING.
It was the captain of the American schooner, from out of which we werethen taking the casks of flour.
"We've no _sarvice_ in our country, I've a notion, my old bobtailroarer," said he. "When do you come alongside of my schooner, fortother lading with this raft of yours? Not to-night, I guess."
"Well, you've guessed right this time," replied old Tom; "we shall lieon the mud till to-morrow morning, with your permission."
"Yes, for all the world like a Louisiana alligator. You take thingscoolly, I've a notion, in the old country. I don't want to be hanginghead and starn in this little bit of a river of your'n. I must be backto New York afore fever time."
"She be a pretty craft, that little thing of yours," observed old Tom;"how long may she take to make the run?"
"How long? I expect in just no time; and she'd go as fast again, onlyshe won't wait for the breeze to come up with her."
"Why don't you heave-to for it?" said young Tom.
"Lose too much time, I guess. I have been chased by an easterly windall the way from your Land's End to our Narrows, and it never couldoverhaul me."
"And I presume the porpoises give it up in despair, don't they?" repliedold Tom, with a leer; "and yet I've seen the creatures playing acrossthe bows of an English frigate at her speed, and laughing at her."
"They never play their tricks with me, old snapper; if they do, I cutsthem in halves, and a-starn they go, head part floating on one side, andtail part on the other."
"But don't they join together again when they meet in your wake?"inquired Tom.
"Shouldn't wonder," replied the American captain.
"Pray, captain, what may be that vessel they talk so much about at NewYork?" Old Tom referred to the first steam vessel, whose qualities atthat time had been tried, and an exaggerated report of which had beencopied from the American papers. "That ship, or whatever she may be,that sails without masts, yards, or canvas; it is quite above mycomprehension."
"Old country heads can't take it in. I'll tell you what--she goes slickthrough the water, a-head or a-starn, broadside on, or up or down, orany way; and all you have to do is to poke the fire and warm yourfingers; and the more you poke, the faster she goes 'gainst wind andtide."
"Well, I must see that to believe it, though," replied old Tom.
"No fear of a capsize, I calculate. My little craft did upset with meone night, in a pretty comfortable heavy _gal_; but she's _smart_, andcame up again on the other side in a moment, all right as before. Nevershould have known anything about it, if the man at the wheel had notfound his jacket wet, and the men below had a round turn in all theclews of their hammocks."
"After that round turn, you may belay," cried young Tom, laughing.
"Yes, but don't let's have a stopper over all, Tom," replied his father."I consider all this excessively _divarting_. Pray, captain, doeseverything else go fast in the new country."
"Everything with us _clean slick_, I guess."
"What sort of horses have you in America?" inquired I.
"Our Kentucky horses, I've a notion, would surprise you. They'realmighty goers; at a trot, beat a _North West gal_ of wind. I once tookan Englishman with me in a gig up Allibama country, and he says, `What'sthis great churchyard we are passing through?' `And stranger,' says I,`I calculate it's nothing but the milestones we are passing so _slick_.'But I once had a horse, who, I expect, was a deal quicker than that. Ionce seed a flash of lightning chase him for half-an-hour round theclearance, and I guess it couldn't catch him. But I can't wait nolonger. I expect you'll come alongside to-morrow afore meridian."
"Ay, ay, master," replied old Tom, tuning up--
"'Twas post meridian, half-past four, By signal I from Nancy parted, At five she lingered on the shore, With uplift eyes and broken-hearted."
"I calculate you are no fool of a screamer," said the American, shovingoff his boat from the barge, and pulling to his vessel.
"And I calculate you're no fool of a liar," said young Tom.
"Well, so he is; but I do like a good lie, Jacob, there's some fun init. But what the devil does the fellow mean by calling a gale ofwind--_a gal_?"
"I don't know," replied Tom, "unless for the same reason that we call agirl _a blowing_."
Our conversation was here interrupted by Mr Hodgson, the new headclerk, of whom I have hitherto said nothing. He came into theestablishment in the place of Mr Tomkins, when we quitted the Batterseawharf, and had taken an evident dislike to me, which appeared toincrease every day, as Mr Drummond gave me fresh marks of hisapprobation. "You, Faithful, come out of that barge directly, and go toyour desk. I will have no eye-servers under me. Come out, sir,directly."
"I say, Mr Quilldriver," cried old Tom, "do you mean for to say thatJacob is an eye-sarver?"
"Yes, I do; and want none of your impertinence, or I'll unship you, youold blackguard."
"Well, then, for the first part of your story, my sarvice to you and you_lies_; and as for the second, that remains to be proved."
Mr Hodgson's temper was not softened by this reply of old Tom. Myblood was also up, for I had borne much already; and young Tom wasbursting with impatience to take my part. He walked carelessly by thehead clerk, saying to me as he passed by, "Why, I thought, Jacob, youwere 'prentice to the river; but it seems that you're bound to thecounting-house. How long do you mean to sarve?"
"I don't know," replied I, as I walked away sulkily; "but I wish I wasout of my time."
"Very well, sir, I shall report your behaviour to Mr Drummond. I'llmake him know your tricks."
"Tricks! you won't let him know his tricks. His duty is to take histrick at the wheel," replied old Tom; "not to be brought up at yourcheating tricks at the desk."
"Cheating tricks, you old scoundrel, what do you mean by that?" repliedMr Hodgson, in a rage.
"My father means _ledger_demain, I suppose," replied young Tom.
This repartee from a quarter so little expected sent off the head clerkmore wroth than ever.
"You seemed to hit him hard there, Tom," said his father; "but I can'tsay that I understand how."
"You've had me taught to read and write, father," replied young Tom;"and a'ter that, a lad may teach himself everything. I pick up everyday, here and there; and I never see a thing or a word that I don'tunderstand but I find out the meaning when I can. I picked up that hardword at Bartlemy fair."
"And very hard you hit him with it."
"Who wouldn't to serve a friend? But mark my words, father, this won'tlast long. There's a squall blowing up, and Jacob, quiet as he seems tobe, will show his teeth ere long."
Tom was correct in his surmise. I had not taken my seat at my desk morethan a minute, when Mr Hodgson entered, and commenced a tirade ofabuse, which my pride could no longer allow me to submit to. Aninvoice, perfectly correct and well-written, which I had nearlycompleted, he snatched from before me, tore into fragments, and orderedme to write it over again. Indignant at this treatment, I refused, andthrowing down my pen, looked at him determinedly in the face. Irritatedat this defiance, he caught up a directory, and threw it at my head. Nolonger able to command myself, I seized a ruler and returned the salute.It was whizzing through the air as Mr Drummond entered the room; andhe was just in time to witness Mr Hodgson struck on the forehead andfelled to the ground, while I remained with my arm raised, standing uponthe cross-bar of my high stool, my face glowing with passion.
Appearances were certainly against me. Assistance was summoned, and thehead clerk removed to his chamber, during all which time I remainedseated on my stool before the desk, my breast heaving with tumultuousfeelings. Ho
w long I remained there I cannot say, it might have beentwo hours; feelings long dormant had been aroused, and whirled round andround in a continual cycle in my feverish brains. I should haveremained probably much longer in this state of absorption, had I notbeen summoned to attend Mr Drummond. It appeared that in the meantimeMr Hodgson had come to his own senses, and had given his own version ofthe fracas, which had been, to an unjustifiable degree, corroborated bythe stupid young clerk, who was no friend of mine, and who sought favourwith his principal. I walked up to the drawing-room, where I found Mrand Mrs Drummond, and little Sarah, whose eyes were red with crying. Ientered without any feeling of alarm, my breast was too full ofindignation. Mrs Drummond looked grave and mournful, Mr Drummondsevere.
"Jacob Faithful, I have sent for you to tell you that in consequence ofyour disgraceful conduct to my senior clerk, you can no longer remainunder my roof. It appears that what I have been a witness to this dayhas been but a sequel to behaviour equally improper and impertinent;that so far from having, as I thought, done your duty, you haveconstantly neglected it; and that the association you have formed withthat drunken old man and his insolent son has led you into this folly.You may say that it was not your wish to remain on shore, and that youpreferred being on the river. At your age it is too often the case thatyoung people consult their wishes rather than their interests; and it iswell for them if they find those who are older, and wished them well, todecide for them. I had hoped to have been able to place you in a morerespectable situation in society than was my original intention when youwere thrown upon me, a destitute orphan; but I now perceive my error.You have proved yourself not only deceitful but ungrateful."
"I have not," interrupted I, calmly.
"You have. I have been a witness myself to your impropriety of conduct,which, it appears, has long been concealed from me; but no more of that.I bound you apprentice to the river, and you must now follow up yourapprenticeship; but expect nothing farther from me. You must now workyour own way up in the world, and I trust that you will reform and dowell. You may return to the lighter until I can procure you a situationin another craft, for I consider it my duty to remove you from theinfluence of those who have led you astray, and with the old man and hisson you will not remain. I have one thing more to say. You have beenin my counting-house for some months, and you are now about to be thrownupon the world. There are ten pounds for your services," (and MrDrummond laid the money on the table). "You may also recollect that Ihave some money belonging to you, which has been laid by until you shallbe out of your apprenticeship. I consider it my duty still to retainthat money for you; as soon as your apprenticeship is expired you maydemand it, and it shall be made over to you. I trust, sincerely trust,Jacob, that the severe lesson you are now about to receive will bringyou to a sense of what is right, and that you will forget the evilcounsel you have received from your late companions. Do not attempt tojustify yourself; it is useless." Mr Drummond then rose and left theroom.
I should have replied, had it not been for this last sentence of MrDrummond's, which again roused the feeling of indignation, which, intheir presence, had been gradually giving way to softer emotions. Itherefore stood still, and firmly met the glance of Mr Drummond as hepassed me. My looks were construed into hardness of heart.
It appeared that Mr Drummond had left the room by previous arrangement,that he might not be supposed to be moved from this purpose, and thatMrs Drummond was then to have talked to me, and to have ascertained howfar there was a chance of my pleading guilty, and begging for amitigation of my sentence; but the firm composure of innocence wasmistaken for defiance; and the blood mounting to my forehead from afeeling of injustice--of injustice from those I loved and venerated--perhaps the most poignant feeling in existence to a sensitive andgenerous mind--was falsely estimated as proceeding from impetuous anddisgraceful sources. Mrs Drummond looked upon me with a mournful face,sighed, and said nothing; little Sarah watching me with her large blackeyes, as if she would read my inmost soul.
"Have you nothing to say, Jacob," at last observed Mrs Drummond, "thatI can tell Mr Drummond when his anger is not so great?"
"Nothing, madam," replied I, "except that I'll try to forgive him."
This reply was offensive even to the mild Mrs Drummond. She rose fromher chair. "Come, Sarah," said she: and she walked out of the room,wishing me, in a kind, soft voice, a "good-bye, Jacob," as she passedme.
My eyes swam with tears. I tried to return the salutation, but I wastoo much choked by my feelings; I could not speak, and my silence wasagain looked upon as contumacy and ingratitude. Little Sarah stillremained--she had not obeyed her mother's injunctions to follow her.She was now nearly fourteen years old, and I had known her as acompanion and a friend for five years. During the last six months thatI had resided in the house we had become more intimately acquainted. Ijoined her in the evening in all her pursuits, and Mr and Mrs Drummondappeared to take a pleasure in our intimacy. I loved her as a dearsister; my love was based on gratitude. I had never forgotten herkindness to me when I first came under her father's roof, and a longacquaintance with the sweetness of her disposition had rendered theattachment so firm, that I felt I could have died for her. But I neverknew the full extent of the feeling until now that I was about to leaveher, perhaps for ever. My heart sank when Mr Drummond left the room--abitter pang passed through it as the form of Mrs Drummond vanished frommy sight; but now was to be the bitterest of all. I felt it, and Iremained with the handle of the door in my hand, gasping for breath--blinded with the tears that coursed each other rapidly down my cheeks.I remained a minute in this state, when I felt that Sarah touched myother listless hand.
"Jacob!" she would have said, but before half my name was out she burstinto tears, and sobbed on my shoulder. My heart was too much surchargednot to take the infection--my grief found vent, and I mingled my sobswith those of the affectionate girl. When we were more composed, Irecounted to her all that had passed, and one, at least, in the worldacknowledged that I had been treated unjustly. I had but just finished,when the servant interrupted us with a message to Sarah, that her motherdesired her presence. She threw herself into my arms, and bade mefarewell. I released her, she hastened to obey her mother, butperceiving the money still upon the table, she pointed to it. "Yourmoney, Jacob!"
"No Sarah, I will not accept it. I would accept of anything from thosewho treat me kindly, and feel more and more grateful to them; but that Iwill not accept--I cannot, and you must not let it be left here. Saythat I could not take it."
Sarah would have remonstrated, but perceiving that I was firm, and atthe same time, perhaps, entering into my feelings, she again bade mefarewell, and hastened away.
The reader may easy imagine that I did not put off my departure. Ihastened to pack up my clothes, and in less than ten minutes after Sarahhad quitted me, I was on board the lighter, with old Tom and his son,who were then going to supper. They knew a part of what had happened,and I narrated the rest.
"Well," replied old Tom, after I had finished my story, "I didn't knowthat I have done you any harm, Jacob, and I'm sorry that Mr Drummondshould suppose so. I'm fond of a drop, that's true; but I appeals toyou, whether I ever force it on you--and whether I don't check that boyas much as I can; but then, d'ye see, although I preach, I don'tpractise, that's the worst of it; and I know I've to answer for makingTom so fond of grog; and though I never says anything about it, I oftenthink to myself, that if Tom should chance to be pressed some of thesedays, and be punished for being in liquor, he'll think of his oldfather, and curse him in his heart, when he eyes the cat flourishinground before it strikes."
"I'll curse the cat, father, or the boatswain's mate, or the officer whocomplained of me, or the captain who flogs me, or my own folly, but I'llbe hanged if ever I curse you, who have been so kind to me," repliedTom, taking his father's hand.
"Well, we must hope for the best, my dear boy," replied old Tom; "but,Jacob, you've not had fair play, th
at sartain. It's very true thatmaster did take you as an orphan, and help you to an education; butthat's no reason why he should take away your free will, and afterbinding you 'prentice to the river, perch you up on a high stool, andgrind your nose down to the desk. If so be he was so kind to you onlyto make you a slave, why, then, there was no kindness at all, in myopinion: and as for punishment without hearing what a man has to say inhis own defence--there's ne'er a Tartar in the sarvice but would allow aman to speak before he orders him to strip. I recollect a story aboutthat in the sarvice, but I'm in no humour to spin a yarn now. Now, yousee, Jacob, Master Drummond has done a great deal for you, and now hehas undone a great deal! I can't pretend to balance the account, but itdoes appear to me that you don't owe him much; for what thanks is thereif you take a vessel in tow, and then cast her off, half-way, when shemost needs your assistance? But what hurts me most is his saying thatyou sha'n't stay in the lighter with us; if you had, you shouldn't havewanted, as long as pay and pension are forthcoming. Never mind--Tom, myboy, bring out the bottle--hang care: it killed the cat."
The grog did not, however, bring back old Tom's spirits; the eveningpassed heavily, and we retired to our beds at a seasonable hour, as wewere to drop down to the schooner early the next morning. That night Idid not close my eyes. I ran over, in my mind, all that had occurred,and indignation took full possession of my soul. My whole life passedin review before me. I travelled back to my former days--to the timewhich had been almost obliterated from my memory, when I had navigatedthe barge with my father. Again was the scene of his and my mother'sdeath presented to my view; again I saw him disappear, and the column ofblack smoke ascend to the sky. The Dominie, the matron, Marables, andFleming, the scene in the cabin--all passed in rapid succession. I feltthat I had done my duty, and that I had been unjustly treated; my headached with tumultuous and long suppressed feelings. Reader, I statedthat when I was first taken in hand by Mr Drummond I was a savage,although a docile one, to be reclaimed by kindness, and kindness only.You may have been surprised at the rapid change which took place in afew years; that change was produced by kindness. The conduct of MrDrummond, of his amiable wife and daughter, had been all kindness; theDominie and the worthy old matron had proved equally beneficent.Marables had been kind; and, although now and then, as in the case ofthe usher at the school, and Fleming on board the lighter, I hadreceived injuries, still, these were but trifling checks to theuninterrupted series of kindness with which I had been treated byeverybody. Thus was my nature rapidly formed by a system of kindnessassisted by education; and had this been followed up, in a few years mynew character would have been firmly established. But the blow was nowstruck, injustice roused up the latent feelings of my nature, and when Irose the next morning I was changed. I do not mean to say that all thatprecept and education had done for me was overthrown; but if notoverthrown, it was so shaken to the base, so rent from the summit to thefoundation, that, at the slightest impulse in a wrong direction, itwould have fallen in and left nothing but a mixed chaos of ruinedprospects. If anything could hold it together it was the kindness andaffection of Sarah, to which I would again and again return in myrevolving thoughts, as the only bright star to be discovered in myclouded horizon.
How dangerous, how foolish, how presumptuous it is in adults to supposethat they can read the thoughts and the feelings of those of a tenderage! How often has this presumption on their part been the ruin of ayoung mind, which, if truly estimated and duly fostered, would haveblossomed and produced good fruit! The blush of honest indignation isas dark as the blush of guilt, and the paleness of concentrated courageas marked as that of fear, the firmness of conscious innocence is buttoo often mistaken as the effrontery of hardened vice, and the tearsspringing from a source of injury, the tongue tied from the oppressionof a wounded heart, the trembling and agitation of the little frameconvulsed with emotion have often and often been ascribed by prejudgingand self-opinionated witnesses to the very opposite passions to thosewhich have produced them. Youth should never be judged harshly, andeven when judged correctly, should it be in an evil course, may alwaysbe reclaimed;--those who decide otherwise, and leave it to drift aboutthe world, have to answer for the _cast-away_.
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