“You never answered my question.” My voice was dry and cracked, like a woman who’d been denied what she needed for way too long. More like I denied myself and my streak remained unbroken. At least for now.
“Yeah, I did.” There was still a hint of a growl to his answer. The wolf hadn’t gone away. He was untamed and rough and I didn’t realize it was his animal coming through. I liked it. But my heart stuttered at the realization that danger was so close, staring at me with those hungry golden eyes. And now, as he stood naked before me, the salty taste of his lips tattooed on mine, I knew way more about him then I ever expected to—even if I couldn’t get him to give me a straight answer to anything.
“Yes and no doesn’t tell me if hurting your brother was a good thing.” I went back to work, cleaning his chest, avoiding eye contact as I dipped down the chiseled plain of his abdomen. And lower. There was no part of this man that wasn’t impressive. Or ready. “So let me try it another way. Are you glad you did it?”
“No.” It came out like a bark.
“Does it make your life easier?”
“Probably not.”
He wasn’t giving me a lot of information, but it was a start. “Are we in danger?”
“Yes.” He snapped out of the drowsy haze the washcloth lulled him into. I might have been a little responsible for that, too. “I need to get you off this mountain as soon as possible.”
My heart slammed against my ribcage. Any creature that ripped into a powerful man like Sebastian would be picking me out of his fangs without a second thought. “How? My ankle is in bad shape and you’re...naked.”
“I’ll carry you.” He scooped me up easily, not giving me a chance to protest that he couldn’t. He could. It wasn’t often a man made me feel petite, but Sebastian managed to do it before he took his first step.
“Is it safe to do this?” I was nothing but a liability. “If you’re forced to fight again, I can’t help you.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but we’ll be fine. I did enough damage to the pack tonight. They won’t be looking for round two. Not yet.” He moved swiftly, even with me in his arms. I hooked my fingers at the back of his neck, careful not to aggravate the wound.
“Hey, I’ve taken some really intense cardio kick classes. I can totally hold my own against the big bad wolf.” My laugh echoed against the darkness, coming back to slap me in the face. “What I meant is, I’m a liability.”
“No, you’re the reward.” He moved at a dizzying pace, dodging rocks and stumps. He’d been training for this moment for years. “Stay as close as you can to me. Otherwise, they’ll scent you.”
I curled in closer to his chest. His heart thumped in time with each step. I closed my eyes and concentrated on the rhythm. “What will they do?”
A growl emitted low from his belly and rumbled through his body, like the first sign of a storm on a hot summer night. “You don’t want to find out.”
That was for damn sure. I didn’t ask any more questions until we got back to Sebastian’s SUV. After depositing me in the passenger’s seat, he opened the back door.
“What are you doing?” I asked. He made the situation sound far too dire to be wasting time. Unless he was worried that someone was lying in wait in the backseat... I swallowed the scream that tasted like hot lava.
“Getting dressed. I always have a change of clothes in the car for practice.” He did so in record time and jumped into the driver’s seat, making the car jump when he put his foot on the gas.
“You don’t even have the lights on.” Sebastian might be the wolf, but I was going to leave claw marks in his car. “I thought the danger passed with your brother out of the picture.”
“I still have my wolf vision.” He turned on the headlights, and for the first time since he started driving, I was able to breathe. “I haven’t shifted since I left Alaska. Don’t know how long it will take to wear off.”
“Do you like being a wolf?” I asked.
“It’s what I am.” He tightened his grip on the steering wheel. “I have a different idea about what it means than the rest of my pack.”
“I might not be able to help you, but I can listen. Sometimes it helps.” The broken pieces were starting to come together as the lights from the edge of town twinkled in front of us. “Are you taking me back to the compound? The crew will be there. There are cameras everywhere.”
And I really wanted him to talk to me.
“You’re right.” He sounded a million miles away. “You can come back to my place, but I have practice in a couple hours.”
“Like hell you’re going to practice. You’re hurt.” He had to be in shock or complete denial.
“We play hurt.” Sebastian headed to a part of town I wasn’t familiar with yet, and I assumed we were headed to his place. “Shit like this happens to shifters all the time. No one will care.”
“They have their lives threatened by their pack? Really?” I called bullshit on that one.
“I’ll heal fast, now that I shifted. I can’t miss practice. My brother’s taken a lot of things away from me.” He let out a low chuckle as he turned onto a side street. “I won’t let him have football, too.”
If his brother was still alive, he wouldn’t have to kill him. Sebastian would do it to himself. He pulled the SUV into a driveway, and I hesitated before getting out. Sebastian came and put his arm around me. I couldn’t put any weight on my ankle. He helped me up the stairs and into the living room.
Sebastian lived in a detached condo that looked an awful lot like the place I was staying at the compound. White walls with no art, overstuffed furniture with no personality. He hadn’t been in Alaska much longer than me, and football consumed his life.
“I can get some ice for your ankle.” He sunk on the couch next to me, but didn’t touch me. I really wanted him to kiss me again, and I was afraid he regretted it. That it had been his wolf talking, and not the man. “It will help with the swelling.”
I nodded. “What about that bite? You should let me put something on it.”
He pulled the collar of his T-shirt away from his neck, revealing new pink skin around a tight scab. “I’m fine. But that ankle looks like it needs some attention.”
“I’ll let you get me some ice. If you tell me why you’re not a part of your pack anymore.”
“Deal.”
Moments later he came back with an ice pack, a towel, and a glass of water. Dragging the ottoman over so I could prop my leg up, he draped the towel over my swollen and now purple ankle before placing the ice pack on it. A chuckle caught low in his throat. “Done this a few times.”
“For yourself or someone else?”
“Myself, mostly. Gotta train all year round or else injuries like this happen. Stay on my toes, so to speak. Can’t let anyone get in my head.” He sat even closer this time, and that warmth was back. So much had happened tonight, and I was so tired. His body heat would turn me to jelly.
I put my hand over his on his thigh. “We’re not talking about football anymore, Sebastian.”
His fingers were calloused and strong. He tightened his grip. I didn’t exactly have a squeaky clean first date track record, but that simple touch was more intimate than nights that ended with a morning walk of shame.
“No, we’re not,” he said softly.
It occurred to me that he might be as bad at this as I was. That he’d spent so long pushing people away he didn’t know how to let someone in. I leaned in, and he took my cue, cradling my face in his hands and stopping just before our lips touched. I was lost in those bright eyes, and it was a shame to close them, even if it was to accept his hot, hungry kiss. He slipped his hand into my hair, giving it a good tug and trailing his lips down my jaw, resting against the throbbing spot on my throat.
What would I do if he marked me? He scraped his teeth against my throat. I couldn’t deny how good it felt, how much I wanted to be claimed. I could almost trick myself into believing we were safe. But we weren’t.
<
br /> “I let you get the ice. Now you have to hold up your end of the deal. Tell me why you’re not a part of your pack.”
Chapter Ten
SEBASTIAN
“I’ve always said you can choose your pack, and mine’s the team. If they’ll have me.” I totally expected the groan that came from Naomi. Her cheeks were flushed pink and she’d had a couple of those really long blinks. I’d put her through too much tonight. “I know, you said no more talking about football. But football caused the divide between me and my brother.”
“Does he play?” she asked.
“No. When we were really little, he’d join in on pick-up games in town. But he never had the passion for it. Or, as I accused him many times, the dedication to make himself better.” And he still didn’t. “I was such an asshole, taunting him because I thought he was weak. But he was smart, and in the end, that was how he beat me. While I was at practice, he was getting the rest of the pack together and coming up with a plan to get rid of me.”
“Why?” She picked her head up and pushed away the hair that stuck to her face. This is what Naomi would look like when she woke up in my bed. My wolf rumbled, and she gave me a sleepy grin. “Seems like a pretty harsh response over a game.”
“It wasn’t only a game. The game was what made it explode. And when my pack turned its back on me, football never did.” But I had to stop hiding behind it. I’d spent the better part of twenty years using at as shield and Naomi was the first person outside the pack that would hear the story. Everyone else who knew it rejected me.
She slipped the cloth out from under the ice pack, and pushed my T-shirt up over my stomach. Her gaze warming my body before the damp cloth touched my skin. She bit her lip, the lipstick long gone, as she made contact. Her touch was so gentle. Soft, like she thought she could hurt me. She stopped over my heart, smiling when it pounded. For her. It took everything I had not to take the cloth from her and run it all over her body. Ease her down onto the cushions and slip that sweater up over her head. I’d felt those luscious curves against my body when I carried her off the mountain, and my wolf wanted to see them for himself.
Patience, beast.
What the hell was I talking about? Oh yeah. My fucking brother.
“I grew up in a place called Faraway Island. It’s one of the barrier islands in the bay. For years, our pack ruled the island. Things are a little different up here, and packs used to have sovereign rule of their land. My father was the alpha of our pack, and one of his twin sons was expected to follow in his footsteps. Which could’ve been either me or Stefan. Of course, the problem with two potential alphas is we were both too stubborn to think the pack wouldn’t be ours.”
“But you got kicked out over football?” Naomi fought a yawn, her eyelids fluttering, but her bright blue gaze landed on me.
I shook my head. “The rules blurred once Alaska became an official state. The land didn’t belong to us anymore. Not legally. We were told that it would be better for us in the long run, and not given much say in the outcome. Faraway is a beautiful island, and it didn’t take long for humans to arrive and start building. We only had a camp for the winter—my ancestors spent most of their time in their wolf form, but with humans around, we adapted. Thought if we were like them, we’d benefit from having them around. But my family worried we’d lose our land. At first, they left us alone. The real trouble started when another pack came to help them build their town.”
Naomi squinted. “I don’t get the connection.”
“As wolves, we didn’t need schools or stores or businesses. The other animals that came to the island with the humans, the cheechako, our word for newcomer, were much more sophisticated. The herd of deer that built most of the buildings on the island was already acclimated to human life. And they wanted our land. They drove us back until all we had was a shitty, rocky corner of the island. The one with too much wind for any humans to want to live there. They gave us the leftovers.”
“I’m sorry,” she said softly.
“We were, too. My grandfather was alpha when the agreement, as they called it, took place.” I huffed, my animal was still alert and ready to attack. “He was a strong wolf, but they were fighting with weapons he’d never seen before. He was outgunned and outmanned. My father was the first alpha who spent more of his time human than wolf. It wasn’t an easy transformation for my elders, and the cheechako ran roughshod over him. Our pack had been driven to the brink.
“My father made sure we played by their rules, but he encouraged us to use them to our advantage. I was the strong one, and there was no question I’d be alpha. My plan was to unite the animals and the humans on the island. There’d been so much violence, mostly against our pack. The cheechako saw us as unsophisticated and stupid. I started playing on the island team, making friends with as many people as I could. I thought that was the way to restore peace. If the island could cheer for all of us on the field, they’d learn to look past our differences. The violence would stop.”
Naomi gave me a sleepy smile. “Sounds like something an alpha would do.”
“I thought so, too. But it wasn’t. Stefan was smarter than me. I gave him so much shit—calling him a nerd, and telling him he was clinging to old ways when he went to pack meetings, taking notes. While I was at practice and acting like some asshole ambassador to Faraway Island, my brother was working with my father behind the scenes. They hated that I worked with the cheechako, especially that one of them was my best friend. Gunnar was our kicker.”
“I bet that went over like a lead balloon.” Naomi winced. “Did they think he’d hurt you? Since the other pack was attacking yours?”
“Yeah, they said he’d betray me, and make a fool out of me for working with the cheechako. But at the time, I had no idea that Stefan and my father were the ones behind the violence.”
“Shit.” She tensed against my shoulder.
“Their plan was to scare the humans and the cheechako away. But it backfired. My father was found dead right after my eighteenth birthday.”
“And Stefan challenged your claim to the pack.”
I nodded. “If it had been a purely physical challenge, I could’ve taken care of it with one swipe of my claw. But Stefan had been preparing for that day much longer than I had. I didn’t have to—the title belonged to me. He’d organized the part of the pack that agreed with his views—they wanted the island back. I could take out Stefan, but I couldn’t fight the entire pack, and be their leader. Stefan said that I had to show loyalty to the pack. And the only way to do that was to kill Gunnar.”
Naomi sat up, her eyes wide. “I assume you didn’t do it.”
“No. The pack immediately showed they wouldn’t be loyal to me. My vision for the pack—tradition and loyalty—meant nothing to them. They wanted the same thing that Stefan did. But the team, I’d fought with those guys for years. I knew they had my back. Didn’t matter what we were.”
“You chose football over the pack,” she said. “What happened then?”
“I got my ass whooped and a personal escort off Faraway Island.” I thought my life was over at that moment. I’d hit rock bottom. I was a shamed wolf with no pack, and a running back with no team. “All I had was my body and the game. I was barely smart enough for college. But I found a school that let me walk onto their team. They worked with me to get me where I needed to be in the classroom. Wouldn’t make that mistake twice. Football was the thing that saved me.”
Naomi softened. To her, it must’ve sounded like a happy ending. “Is that why you decided to come back?”
“I didn’t decide to come back.” It came out as a growl. “I planned to play a fifth year to get myself as strong as possible for the pros. But two games in, I got hurt. ACL tear. Missed the rest of the season. Would’ve healed faster if I shifted, but I refused to let my wolf out. It was a huge mistake. The scouts got antsy. Didn’t matter how hard I trained, or what the doctors said. I was injury prone and they didn’t have the stats on me like th
ey did on the other guys. The draft came and went, and I didn’t get a call. Until the Bloodhounds drafted me. The last fucking thing I wanted to do was come back to Alaska. Stefan promised he’d kill me I did if I came back. But if I didn’t, I was out of the game for good.”
“You risked everything so you could play.”
I nodded. I really wanted to risk everything and kiss her again. On this shit night, I needed to know I made the right decision. The light in her eyes changed. The room was full of shadows in the early morning, and a slice of sunshine landed on her. I didn’t ask her to understand the choices I made. But I wanted to know the most important thing—if she had my back.
Her sweater was so soft to the touch when I put my hand on her back. It had felt good when I carried her down the mountain against my abraded skin. But I didn’t have the time to appreciate it until now. I ran my hand down the length of her back, and she closed her eyes and sighed.
There it was. My opening. I’d made a career out of exploiting those. But this one was different, and I knew it as soon as I slanted my mouth over hers. She settled into the kiss, tightening her grip on my shoulders. I needed this so bad. Naomi gave me the thing my own pack couldn’t—the place I belonged. She was my mate.
The kiss started slow, just like the last one. Neither of us ready to tell each other what we wanted. What we needed. I’d put her through a lot tonight, then dumped all my shit on her. If this were a pity fuck, I would’ve pulled away. She didn’t hesitate, taking everything I gave her, moving her lips against mine with her own need. I licked the seam of her lip and she let me inside. Our tongues tangled. A gasp punctuated the kiss, and we settled with our foreheads against each other, catching our breath, not wanting the moment to end. But it had to.
I pressed another kiss against her lips. “Now you understand why I have to go to practice.”
Chapter Eleven
NAOMI
Sebastian was in no shape for practice, sleepless and shattered from his confession. Wow. I hadn’t expected he was risking his life just by being in Alaska. But now I understood why he couldn’t take today off, even if I thought it was a horrible idea for him to go. I leaned in for one more kiss before he got out of the SUV, hoping I could change his mind. I wasn’t doing it to be selfish or lay claim on him. I wasn’t that kind of girl. I thought he’d play better if he got some rest. If he let his body and heart heal.
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