by Raathi Chota
“If it lets you sleep at night, then let’s do it,” Benny said as he nervously rubbed his hands together.
“Do what?”
My head snapped to the door Nick was supposed to guard as I saw Blake walk in. He had his plate in his one hand and overnight bag in the other as he watched us.
“Go out to the place…” Liam trailed off as he looked at Benny and me.
“What place?” Blake asked.
“The place to get the things…right, Benny?” Liam asked as he glared at him.
“Wha—oh! Yeah, the things. We’ll go get the stuff,” Benny said as he tugged on Nick’s arm.
“See you later, Lana; we’re going to get the ‘things,’ and thanks for letting us stay,” Liam said as he followed Benny and a confused Nick. Blake had a puzzled look on his face as he watched them tumble out of the kitchen. Once they were gone, he turned back to me and set the plate on the counter.
“I better get going,” he mumbled as he slowly approached me.
“Err…yeah. Thanks for staying,” I mumbled.
“No problem,” he replied. “And don’t worry, things will get better,” Blake assured me as he placed his hand on my arm and stroked it. I avoided eye contact as he awkwardly stood there. I think he noticed my discomfort as he pulled away. We walked into the living room as I greeted everyone. Melissa got a ride with Miranda because she said that Liam, Benny, and Nick were gone so fast.
After everyone left, I realized what a mess we made. Mom was going to be annoyed with me, but I couldn’t care less, even though we had guests tomorrow. I cleaned up until I heard a knock on the door. I raised a brow but thought it was someone who forgot something. I strolled to the door and opened it to see Liam. Nick and Benny were in the car watching me. I turned back to Liam to see a smug look on his face as he yanked me out of the house.
“Let’s go pay someone a happy visit.”
***
“Fuck you, Liam!” Nick yelled as he threw the shovel toward Liam. Thankfully, he saw it in time and dodged it. We drove for almost an hour to where we buried Jack’s body. Nick got frustrated because it was Liam’s idea, and to top it off, it rained. Not to mention the whole ride here Liam annoyed him. I watched the two in amusement as I leaned against Nick’s car. Benny took out shovels from the trunk as I turned to him.
“Do you really wanna do this?” I asked as he looked at me.
“I- I don’t know,” he stuttered. “We can’t stop now. Otherwise, we drove here for nothing.”
“Fair enough,” I stated as he handed me a shovel. We walked as Benny guided us. I didn’t remember where he was buried because it was almost two months ago. Thank goodness it drizzled and wasn’t hard rain. The sun set, which meant it’d be harder to see. Benny must have noticed it too, as he picked up his pace. After twenty minutes, we finally stopped. Benny looked around at the flat, wet land.
“Come on, let’s hurry up,” he said as he forced the shovel in the ground and dug. Everyone followed as we dug in silence. Something didn’t feel right. I looked up to see Nick’s squinted eyes as he dug. Liam didn’t seem fazed, as he was too excited to meet his friend again. It became harder to dig as the sun disappeared, which only left us with a little lantern. After what felt like an eternity, I dropped the shovel and ran my hand through my curly hair.
“Go rest, Lana. We’ll take it from here,” Liam assured me. I glanced at my phone and noticed that it was almost eight p.m. Time flew as we worked so hard. I walked away from where they dug, but not too far, so I could watch them. Nobody spoke, which made me nervous. We’re supposed to be typical teenagers who were supposed to go to parties and stuff, not bury bodies and argue. It’s funny that at the start of the school year I thought it’d be like any other year with Benny. It’s true how things could be fine one moment, and then the next everything crashed down. Three months ago, I’d never imagined myself doing this. I felt a tear run down my cheek as I remembered all the things that happened during the last two months. Homecoming was crap, mid-terms were crap. I didn’t want Christmas to be the same.
“Are you okay?” Benny asked as I glanced up. I shook my head as another tear fell, and I opened my arms. Benny immediately came and let me wrap my arms around him as I cried. “Ssh, don’t cry, Lana. Everything’s gonna be okay.”
“I’m a killer,” I cried into his chest.
“No, you’re not,” Benny said as I looked up at him. “You’re a smart, beautiful, kind, caring, and brave person. Lana Willson, you’re quite mysterious, but you’re no killer,” he whispered as he buried his head in the crook of my neck. I went stiff as he kissed up the curve of my throat, yet I didn’t stop him. My hands went around his neck as he lifted his head and pressed his forehead against mine. He looked at me, then my lips, as I did the same. A sudden déjà vu swept over me as the rain poured down on us. “I just want to feel your lips against mine again,” Benny whispered as he leaned closer. He pressed his lips against mine as I shut my eyes. I immediately kissed back as Benny’s hand went around my waist. I ran my fingers through his wet hair and gripped it; he responded. A strange feeling went through my stomach as he tugged on my bottom lip to deepen the kiss. I didn’t know how long we kissed, but I didn’t care. It seemed right in a way because I knew that Benny Nielson had changed.
“Hate to break up your guys’ little make-out scene, but we need help here, you know,” Nick complained as we pulled apart. I suddenly felt better and more alive after that kiss. Benny’s hands glided up my body as he took my hands. A goofy grin spread across his face as we walked back to Liam and Nick. We continued to dig as rain poured down on us.
“What’s that?” I pointed to a plain old fabric that stuck out of the ground. Liam reached down and pulled on the material. We thought that it was small, but it turned out to be a big piece of clothing. Nick shone his phone as we observed it. I suddenly paled as the realization hit me. The guys seemed to notice it too as Liam held the jacket up.
“I-If this is his ja-jacket then…” Nick trailed off as he shone his light in the empty hole that we dug. “Where’s the body?”
“What do you mean?” I demanded and looked at the jacket, then at the empty hole we dug. No one spoke, but our actions screamed for help. Liam tossed the jacket back in the hole and tried to shine his phone flashlight into the grave, but the rain made it impossible to look. Benny glanced around for who knew what reason, as if he’d know where Jack’s body would actually be buried. Nick jabbed his shovel in the ground repeatedly and cussed words that I didn’t even know existed.
“Maybe we just dug in the wrong place.” Benny shrugged, and a light shone on him. I turned to Liam, who stared at him with squinted brows. Liam’s hands trembled as he tried to steady himself because he was nearest to the hole.
“Liam, watch ou—”
“No, we did not. I made sure this was the spot where we left him, and why would his jacket be here? The body was stolen!”
“Why wouldn’t they take the jacket, though?” I asked, but Liam ignored me as he continued to look around.
“I find it ironic that it was your idea to come out here and the body’s suddenly gone!” Nick said as he made his way toward Liam. Nick gave Liam a slight shove, and I gasped because they could’ve fallen in the hole. The rain made everything worse; our shoes were muddy, our clothes clung to our bodies, and our hair stuck to our foreheads. “Where’s the body, Liam? This is not fucking funny!”
“I don’t know! Why would I steal it? How?”
“Hey! Drop it, you two!” Benny stepped in and pulled them back from the hole. I hopelessly stood on the other side as they stared at each other. Benny stood between them, a hand resting on each of their chests as he glanced at them. He looked up at me and announced, “We’ll just keep looking, all right? He’s gotta be around here somewhere.”
We did as Benny Nielson said and dug around the empty hole, which soon filled with rainwater. The night stretched into a dark, eerie silence between the four of us. The rain got t
o a point where I didn’t feel cold anymore. I was covered in a wet blanket that got thicker by the second. My shoes began to fill up with water, but I continued to dig until my hands ached from the repetitive actions. I didn’t complain, though, because the only thing I cared about at that moment was finding Jack August.
Acknowledgements
The Wattpad community started it all. The people who read my first few drafts of this book before I had to take it down for it to get published—thank you, because if it weren’t for your engagement and helpful feedback, I wouldn’t have the honor of writing this.
To my family, who grew curious at the start as to why I’d ask them odd questions and, when I finally told them, fully supported me. My dad, who answered all my questions and gave me the opportunity to start a new life in a new country. My mom, who never bothered me much with everything but knew I liked my space. No one understands me better than she does. My younger sister, who begged me to write more, so I wrote. To my grandparents, who always checked up on me and who I could tell the entire plot to, and they’d find it interesting, that worked for me. Thank you, and I love you all so much. Your response means the world to me because I want to do right.
To Jazmine and Kanita, my dearest friends in Adelaide, South Australia, who encouraged me when things got too hard and I wanted to stop writing. My other friends in Perth, Western Australia, who took me in with open arms, and Tien Doan, who read and gave a different perspective to certain scenes I wrote.
My editor, Toni Rakestraw, who stuck through this complex story and taught me a few things on the way. If it weren’t for your guidance, I wouldn’t know what page we’d still be stuck on. Thank you for your patience when I didn’t know and for helping me bring this all together.
Thank you to Limitless Publishing for accepting my manuscript. That started everything. LP was the first publisher I sent my manuscript to before eight others, and I didn’t think the first would be the lucky one. Thank you to all the staff at LP who made me feel welcome, like I was part of them, even if I’m on the other side of the world!
I’d also like to thank the many YA authors as well as TV shows aimed at young adult audiences who inspired me to write something as unusual yet complicated like CBTBB.
If it weren’t for all of you amazing people in my life, I wouldn't be where I am today. I doubted myself a lot but stuck through with your words of encouragement.
About the Author
Raathi Chota’s writing first began as a hobby and after growing in popularity, her gift for storytelling took off. Since gaining over ten million reads with her first novel on Wattpad, Raathi found her true calling. Being a regular high school student in Australia and a dedicated writer, her imagination knows no bounds. She enjoys random adventures where she knows she will find inspiration. Her stories are general fiction that is packed with young adult, thriller, mystery and romance themes. Raathi’s stories are page-turners leaving you yearning for more. She gained over twenty-five thousand followers across Instagram, Twitter, Wattpad, and Inkitt combined. She recently began the second book on Wattpad and additional chapters on Inkitt where it gained its popularity and began trending on their website.
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/Raathi-Chota-162715917804333/?modal=admin_todo_tour
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/Raathi07
Goodreads:
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16429704.Raathi_Chota
Wixsite:
https://raathichota.wixsite.com/blog
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/raathi07/
Wattpad:
https://www.wattpad.com/user/Raathi07
Inkitt:
https://inkitt.app.link/RA_Raathi_Chota
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