by Bale, Sarah
“God, I needed that,” I said, kissing him.
He nodded. “Me, too.”
His forehead creased and I shook my head.
“Not right now. I know things are shit and we have a lot to talk about, but for now I need it to be just you and me.”
He kissed me. “You and me.”
We stayed there together until the sky began to turn pink with the first signs of dawn. We snuck back to the bunk and climbed into our cot.
Everything would work out for us. It had to.
7
“Daisy, Lilly wants to talk to you.”
My mom’s voice startled me, and I dropped the book I was holding. It was one of my favorites growing up about twin sisters who live in California. Lilly and I used to pretend we were them and I’d even begged my parents for Jeep.
I shoved aside the memory and asked, “Where is she?”
I prayed she wasn’t in the study. I didn’t think I could handle being in that room right now. Or ever again.
“She’s on the back porch.”
There were bags under my mom’s eyes and she looked so dang tired.
“Mom, are you okay?”
“I-” she inhaled and went on, “Can you ask Lilly when she’s going to give your father back to me? Please.”
My stomach felt like it was full of lead.
“She still has it?”
“Your father is not an it!” She shook her head. “Lilly said I needed to remember how kind she was to let me have that little piece of him. Tell her I said I was thankful for everything she’s done for me.”
“Mom, are you listening to yourself? You shouldn’t be thankful to have dad’s freaking head! You should be asking her how she could kill her uncle!”
My mom backed away from me, like I was crazed. Maybe I was.
“Daisy, you need to shut up right now. Don’t ever say anything like that again.”
My mouth snapped shut and I brushed past my mom before I said something that I wouldn’t be able to take back. I knew she was only defending Lilly because she was suffering from Stockholm syndrome or something similar. I made my way through the living room, where more men I hadn’t seen before were cleaning their weapons on my mom’s dainty couches.
I went out the back door and found Lilly sitting on the swing my dad had carved with his own two hands. He’d put it up so Lilly and I would have a place to sit and eat our ice cream. My face felt hot and I tried not to glare at Lilly. How dare she sit there!
“Took you long enough to get out here.”
I leaned against the porch rail. “Sorry.”
Her guards came from the house and stood on either side of her while she swung back and forth. She was never alone.
“Hmm. Your tone doesn’t indicate that you’re sorry. But whatever.”
I didn’t disagree with her.
Instead, I said, “My mom said you were looking for me.”
“Yes.”
She was going to make me ask what she wanted. She’d always been like this.
But she surprised me by saying, “I was thinking about our trip to New York City.”
Out of everything she could have said, that surprised me. I didn’t know what to say. Part of me felt like this was a trap. The other side of me wondered if she was sorry for putting our lives in danger and this was her way of saying it.
“We were so young and dumb. I can’t believe Aunt Rose and Uncle Brad let us go.”
This made me smile. “I don’t think they wanted us to go, but they were smart enough to give us a little bit of freedom.”
I’d overheard my parents talking one night, all those years ago. My dad was terrified we’d talk to strangers and get into all sorts of trouble. In retrospect he’d been right. We had talked to strangers and got into trouble, but only after the world had gone to shit.
“Do you ever think about what things would be like if we hadn’t left Texas when the outbreak happened?”
I had, but I still wasn’t sure what Lilly’s motives were with this conversation. I’d learned in a very short time that Lilly always had a reason for the things she did. And, after seeing what she’d done to my dad, I was afraid to find out what her motive was.
“Well?”
I shrugged. “I haven’t thought about it.”
“I think you’re lying. Or maybe what happened to you wasn’t as bad as what happened to me. I mean I did take the brunt of things back in New York, didn’t I?”
She had, but what she was implying wasn’t the truth. Or fair.
I said, “Lilly-”
“Think about it – I let that guy fuck me so we could get to the airport. And when that fell through I let that man and woman have their way with me so we could have a ride. But that last guy, now he was a real prick. Remember him?”
My skin felt like it was crawling. I did remember him. He’d looked half dead. Maybe it was drugs. Or maybe he’d been bitten. Either way, we should have never followed him into that hotel room.
“Why are you talking about this, Lilly? Why now?”
“Because no one else on this earth understands what I did so we could get home. At the time I thought I was being noble.” Her eyes flashed. “I didn’t want my sweet and innocent cousin to soil her body. So I said I’d do it.”
I closed my eyes, knowing what was coming next.
“And you fucking let me. You didn’t even offer to help.”
“What could I have done, Lilly? You’re right I was innocent then. I had nothing to offer.”
“You have holes in your body, don’t you? That’s all those people wanted - a hole to fuck. Didn’t matter if you were willing or even if you knew what you were doing.” She glared at me. “It was the only way to get home and you didn’t even step up.”
That made me snap.
“You’re wrong, Lilly. There were other ways to get home. You just wouldn’t listen to me.”
She huffed. “Oh yes, I remember your ideas. Wait for Uncle Brad to get us. As if he would have made it.”
He would have!
She went on, “Pawn our shit. Like money mattered at that point.”
“Our jewelry would have been worth something. That’s what people wanted right after the outbreak. Gold and silver.”
“What was your other idea? Steal a car?”
I replied, “Don’t you think that would have been better in the long run than what you went through? Than letting those men fuck you just to get a ride down the road?”
She jumped to her feet and crossed the porch in three steps. I stood, too, meeting her square on. The guards glanced at each other and one unclipped his gun.
Lilly’s lips twitched. “My, how things have changed. A few years ago, you would have flinched and begged me not to hit you.”
“A lot has changed since you knew that girl.”
And she would be wise to remember it.
“That might be true, but I’m sure you still have the same weaknesses you did back then.”
I stared at her without responding.
“I’m sure of it. I bet if I brought your mom out here and held a knife to her throat you would be begging me not to kill her.”
“Is that what you did to my dad? Did you kill him to prove a point?”
Lilly slapped me so hard across the cheek that I heard bells ringing inside my skull. My skin flushed and felt broken at the same time. I touched my cheek and found blood on my fingers.
She held up her hand. “Oops. Did I forget to take my ring off before hitting you?”
But it wasn’t her ring. It was my mother’s engagement ring!
“Why are you wearing that?”
She twisted the gold band on her finger, causing the diamonds to sparkle in the light.
“Because it’s mine. Everything here is mine.”
“That belongs to my mom, Lilly. Give it back.”
She said, “She gave it to me, dear cousin. It’s mine.”
“Was the before or after you cut off my dad’s h
and?”
“Before.”
I was getting mad, which is what she probably wanted.
“I’m sure there’s more to this story than you’re telling me. There always is with you.” I took a step closer. “Do you know how I know that? Because some things never change.”
Lilly stared at me, but I didn’t back down. Finally, she nodded.
“Time to take a tour. Come on.”
She stepped off the porch and walked toward the shed my dad had built. Inside sat the ATV I’d gotten for Christmas right before the outbreak. It was still as beautiful as I remembered. Lilly climbed on, starting it. I didn’t want to sit behind her, but there wasn’t another option unless I walked.
Lilly glared. “Get on.”
Sighing, I climbed on. She took off before my butt hit the seat. Bitch! We sped across the property, heading toward the south pastures. Theo’s words came back to me and I shivered. We drove past some tents at the same time Lilly’s guards caught up to us in an old truck.
I called out, “What are those tents?”
“Housing for those who haven’t proven their loyalty to me.”
The weather in Texas was too extreme to live in a freaking tent. It went from cold nights to hot days, even in the fall. She drove down a ravine and I held onto her waist so I didn’t fall off. Her gun gleamed in the sunlight. Like some kind of mind reader, she glanced over her shoulder and unclipped the pistol, putting it out of my reach.
Lilly slowed down as we went up the other side of the ravine, which was dangerous. She’s flipped her own ATV when we were kids doing the same thing. I opened my mouth to tell her just that and got a whiff of something that made my stomach roll. Death. Decay. Rot.
We drove over the ravine and I gasped. The fence line looked more like a deranged cemetery. Wooden poles were driven into the ground and on the tip of each one was a head. Lilly drove alongside the row and I tried to hold my breath. Until we came up to Theo’s dad and brothers’ heads.
She came to a complete stop and I realized the heads were spiked just enough to stay on the wooden poles, but not enough to go through the brains.
I gasped and coughed, choking on the smell.
“How could you do this?”
Lilly turned the ATV off and got off. She walked up to Tim and flicked his forehead. Much like my dad, he blinked, silently searching for a meal.
“I never liked Theo’s dad. He caught us making out once and wouldn’t let Theo come around. Said I was too loose. What does that even mean?”
I had an idea or two.
She went on, “Before I killed him, I made him watch Theo screw me. I don’t think he cared at that point, but whatever. Sure was great to watch him turn, though. Even in death he was dramatic.”
“Why did you bring me here?”
I held my hand over my nose, but there were too many rotting heads near us. I swallowed thick saliva and prayed I didn’t throw up in front of her.
She walked a few steps away and pointed to a head. “I dated this guy in high school.”
“Why did you kill him?”
“He broke in after he heard I was here. I told him to leave and he tried to push me around. So I killed him and his family.” She walked down a little more. “I really hated killing his infant step-sister.”
The head was so tiny. I didn’t know how she’d managed to get it on the spike. My stomach revolted against me and I lost the battle. I spewed vomit onto the grass until there was nothing left to void.
When I straightened, Lilly smiled.
“Finished? Well, walk this way. There’s more to see.”
She pointed out different people we’d grown up with along the fence. Each person had met this fate because they hadn’t listened to her. Finally, we reached the last head. I took a step back.
“Lilly?”
She leaned forward and kissed the cheek of the head.
“Remember him?”
My skin felt prickly.
“Well?”
I nodded.
“I’m going to tell you how he ended up in Texas.”
8
I braced myself. This wasn’t going to be pretty.
“When you ran out of that hotel room in New York you missed a hell of a show. I was bleeding everywhere from the cut on my face. Thought I was going to die. And then this asshole did the unexpected. He took me to a hospital.” She stared at the head as she went on. “The ER was insane, but they managed to fix me up. He told them I was his wife. With all the shit going on they never questioned it.”
My legs felt shaky, but I held my ground.
“We left and he said he was sorry. Said since you were gone that he was my family now.” Her gazed narrowed. “I told him I loved him and it worked. Then I asked if we could come to Texas. The idiot thought it was a great idea.”
I’m sure she was waiting for me to say something, but I kept my mouth shut.
“Traveling with him wasn’t as bad as I thought. People didn’t mess with him and I was able to heal in peace. Until we got to the ranch. He said he was tired of waiting for me to put out.”
“What did you do to him?”
“He undressed and pushed me to my knees. When he put his disgusting prick in front of me I bit down until it came off. He howled worse than a pig being slaughtered.” Her eyes were bright with merriment. “So, I grabbed a pencil and shoved it in his jugular. I got to watch him bleed out until he died and turned.”
“I’m glad he died.”
I meant it, too.
She met my gaze. “Me, too.”
“But I’m not like him. And I don’t plan on letting you kill me or my friends.”
“Then don’t piss me off. You’re a smart girl, Daisy. Don’t fuck this up.”
I replied, “I don’t plan on it.”
No, what I was planning was better. I was going to get out of here and if she tried to stop me then I was going to kill her.
I was about to go back to the ATV when she stopped me.
“What happened to you after you left the hotel? I just knew you were dead when you didn’t show up here after all that time.”
“I gathered that when everyone looked like they’d seen a ghost when I showed up.”
She shrugged. “They wanted to know where you were. I had to tell them something.”
“I made my way toward Texas. After being on the road for three months and not making much progress I met some nice people who took me under their wing. So I traveled with them.”
And when they died, I joined another camp. And so on, so forth, until I ended up in Oklahoma where Elijah’s men took over my camp and I met him. I didn’t say this to Lilly, though. There was power that came with knowledge. And she didn’t need to know this.
“So you met some nice people and took your time getting back here?” She huffed. “That figures.”
“What does that mean?”
“We attract very different people. We always have. And that’s apparently something that didn’t change in the apocalypse.”
“Well, once a bitch, always a bitch…”
One of the guards coughed and it sounded like he was trying to cover up a laugh.
Lilly said, “I have to wonder how you ended up with someone like Elijah.”
“Our paths crossed and it seemed like a good fit.”
She snorted. “I’m sure.”
I nibbled on my bottom lip and said, “You keep calling him boss. Why?”
“You know why. That’s what they called him back in Oklahoma.”
My heart jumped in my chest. “I’m aware of that. How do you know that?”
“Like I said before, I have my sources.”
“Did your sources tell you that we were literally smoked out of our home? That innocent people died? That the building we lived in burned down?”
She said, “They might have smoked you out, but it didn’t burn down. They were smarter than that. As for people dying-” She pointed to the fence. “- it happens.”
> “How do you know that it didn’t burn down?”
Sighing, she said, “Because I am a part of a network and we keep tabs on each other. If Elijah had been smarter, he would have done the same thing.”
“Network?”
“Oh good god. Do I have to spell everything out? There’s a network that runs down I-35. We keep each other informed. It keeps us safe.”
“So you knew we were coming?”
“I didn’t know it was you, but I knew a party was heading this way. We got word of it after your little detour in Gainesville. Elijah was well-known in Oklahoma, so people were curious when he fled.”
I was in shock.
She said, “Though, I’d heard he was injured. Was he?”
I shook my head. Again, knowledge was power. And right now I was feeling pretty powerful.
“I was hurt, though. Maybe your network got their wires crossed.”
She thought over my words. “Maybe. Wouldn’t be the first time it’s happened.”
“Thank you for answering me.”
A look of surprise flashed across her face. “You’re welcome.” A moment later, “And I’m glad you didn’t die.”
I didn’t know if I felt the same way. If she had died my dad and a lot of other people would still be alive.
But, I said, “I’m glad you didn’t die, either.”
Because the last time I’d seen her, that man had been on top of her, carving her face with a knife. And no one deserved that.
“I hope you learned something by coming out here, Daisy. I don’t like killing people, but sometimes it must be done. Follow the rules, obey me, and everything will be fine.”
I nodded and she seemed pleased with it. She went to the ATV and started it.
“Want to drive?”
She was offering a peace of sorts. And I could play along until Elijah and I escaped. I grinned and hopped on first. She got on behind me and I took off, much like she had done to me.
Elijah
I couldn’t find Daisy and no one knew where she was. Even Theo was close-lipped about her whereabouts. On top of that, I’d found out that Lilly had more than just the three guards protecting her. So, killing her was out of the question for now.