He doesn’t look at me, pretending to be focused solely on his soup. “Wow, this is fantastic.”
“Tell me what you know about them,” I insist, ignoring his compliment.
Another pause as he tears off a piece of his bread. At my patient stare, he sighs. “Whoever’s behind it, they’re using the corporation as a front.”
“A front for what?” I add a slice of cheddar cheese to my bread. “So, they’re not planning on turning your property into a resort?”
“They barely even exist on any records I can find, and the previous place they bought in Arizona, they set up a research facility, not a vacation spot.”
The bread and cheese taste delicious with the soup. I let his words, and the follow-up ideas, churn through my brain a moment. “What kind of research?”
He finishes a slice and wipes his hands on a napkin. “Not sure. I’m still digging, but could be military.”
“You mean, like the Coast Guard?”
A shrug. “I have contacts in the government, but even they know very little.”
“Contacts?” I swallow a spoonful of soup. “Sounds mysterious.”
“Top secret,” he says, giving me a wink.
But underneath it, his energy says he’s not joking. “You’re serious.”
He shoves more bread in his mouth, focusing on his soup.
Okay, then.
I fiddle with another slice. “One of these days, you’re going to tell me.”
“One day,” he agrees. I don’t feel reassured, though.
He finishes, places a hand on my arm. “Please don’t let Watson and her I’m harmless demeanor trick you. Whatever her and her group are up to, it’s not good. I’ve dealt with her kind before. I don’t trust her and neither should you.”
I place my hand over his. “You’re right not to, even though she looks like Mrs. Weasley. Her energy is off. She definitely has something up her sleeve, and none of us are falling for it.”
When we’re done, he insists on taking me to the hill. I bundle up, knowing it will be cold, but the excitement in my veins warms my blood. It’s not all about Quin—honestly—I’m also looking forward to watching the stars.
I pack hot apple cider in a thermos and we dig up some blankets. Sirius comes along, loping quietly by my side.
On the way there, I feel happy, and I shut down the worry about Watson, my sleepwalking, and Mom’s death anniversary. The night air fills my lungs and I breathe easier than I have in days. Maybe years.
In a sense, I feel like I’m fifteen all over again and meeting Quinn, like we occasionally did in high school, whenever we could pull it off.
Sneaking out of the house wasn’t easy, so I used Melisandra as an ally. I’d stay at her house, and see Quinn.
He and I talked about movies and books, our futures, and I showed him different constellations. I taught him about the sky, and I like to think it was one of the reasons he fell in love with the idea of joining the Air Force.
Of course, Charlie had already joined, and Quinn looked up to him. Quinn often spoke of flying, being above the earth and seeing everything from a different perspective.
The smell of distant wood fires tease my nose, along with damp leaves and frost. As we wander, taking our favorite path, Sirius runs full tilt, barking and growling at things in the bushes and behind the tall pines.
At the top, we find our old spot, and it looks as though Quinn came earlier in the day to clear it. We spread the blankets and make ourselves comfortable.
It’s a clear night, perfect for stargazing. Everything in me relaxes..
In the past, we’d lie arm-in-arm. Tonight, there’s several inches of distance between our bodies. Quinn puts his hands behind his head, a gesture so familiar, it makes my heart hurt.
“Man, I’ve missed this,” he says quietly.
An owl hoots. The air is cool on my exposed cheeks but the rest is covered and warm. I allow my clairsentience to reach out and see what Quinn is feeling, and for the first time since he’s been back, I sense peace.
Sirius gives up marking the trees and lays at my feet. The moon is almost full and for lack of anything better to talk about, I mention the pending eclipse. “You know, they bring forth secrets.”
A soft grumbling chuckle comes from Quinn’s throat. “Is this where I confess all?”
“I’ve discovered it’s best to divulge them freely and openly. During a lunar eclipse, you may find your closet skeletons revealed in unexpected ways, some unpleasant.”
“Closet skeletons usually are unpleasant to reveal.”
True. “I know you want to protect me, but I do have ways of discovering what’s going on, and I’m quite capable of defending myself and my sisters.”
“Astrology is really a way of life to you, isn’t it?” he asks, still trying to divert the conversation.
“It explains so much to me,” I admit. “It makes sense when other things don’t.”
He’s quiet for several long heartbeats. “Like me?”
The owl slips into silence, as if holding its breath the same way I am. I almost hate to say anything, afraid I’ll ruin the moment. “Yes.”
A hush falls. The stars are pinpricks above us. The cold night air makes everything crisp and clean, and I wish Quinn and I could start over as he suggested last night.
Sirius shifts at my feet and Quinn says, “I found out Charlie’s plane crash was real, but the circumstances around it were more involved than what they told us. They said it was behind enemy lines in the Middle East. I believe they’re lying.”
Of all the things I was expecting, this wasn’t it. “You mean someone—the enemy—shot him down?”
“That’s what they want us to think. They blamed it on a terrorist group, said he was executed and his plane destroyed. I know that’s not true, and I’ve been searching for answers since I left Raven Falls.”
My breath is like thinly spun cotton as it fogs above me. “Who do you think did it?”
“I have my suspicions, but no proof. I don’t believe he was in the Middle East, or that he was shot down at all. They never recovered his body, and I…” He shrugs. “I don’t know.”
I raise up on one elbow. “By the goddess, you think he’s still alive?”
Quinn’s face is a mask in the moonlight. “Honestly, no, but there’s a part of me that still holds out hope. The problem is, if he got mixed up with the wrong group… I found leads that suggest his superiors chose him for a special testing program. There’s no evidence the program actually exits, though. No proof he was in it.”
Danger. I feel it oozing from his pores and it sends shivers racing over me. I know he’s holding back from spilling all of his theories because doing so could, in fact, endanger me. All of us.
He’s been telling the truth about that.
“You’ve spent all this time trying to prove Charlie was intentionally killed by someone other than a terrorist group?” My mind scrambles. “That’s why you left?”
“Yes,” he admits, “but I planned on returning, I swear. But then I realized doing so was a bad idea.”
I wonder if he’s going to say it was because of me. That my alternative lifestyle, being a witch, or something along that line kept him away. That even though he always claimed he was fine with it, when push came to shove, his religious background made him squeamish.
“Why?”
He rubs a hand over his face, stares at me. “There are people who want to use you, Autumn. And your sisters.”
Flipping back the blanket, I sit up and look down on him. “For what?”
His face is dark in the shadows from my upper body, but I see stars reflected in his eyes. “For intelligence, warfare, you name it. There’s a group inside our government that knows clairvoyance, telekinesis, and other magicks are real. They’ve done research on it for years and they know your gifts can change the playing field. You can see into the future or affect the outcome of war by doing that astral travel thing you do.”
“What? That’s—” I start to say, ridiculous, but the word sticks in my throat.
“The group I uncovered goes by PNR Labs—paranormal research labs. If they find out about you…”
I have a moment of absolute speechlessness. Pieces of the puzzle drop into place. “How did you discover this?”
“By investigating Charlie’s death. There are plenty of unusual phenomena happening in the world, and one rabbit hole led to another. They may be tied into his last mission.”
“You cut ties with me, cold turkey, when you found out about them in order not to lead them to me. To us.”
He reaches out to touch my cheek. “For all the good I’ve done to help our country,” he says softly, “I refuse to ever put you in danger, no matter what it costs me personally.”
His smile is sad.
“Oh, Quinn.”
“I’ve seen what PNR Labs has done to the magick users they…drafted…to their program. Things haven’t gone well for them.”
My stomach sinks. Sirius sits up, ears pointed. “What exactly are they doing to them?”
He rises, so we’re sitting facing each other. “They’ve all disappeared or worse. Thing is, they’ve run through all the truly gifted who volunteered for the program. Now, they’re looking for others to fill the ranks, and they won’t take no for an answer.”
If anyone saw us, face-to-face like this, they’d probably assume we’re about to kiss. Instead, we’re talking about life and death and magick under our breath, as if someone were eavesdropping. “That’s the real reason you were coming home for Thanksgiving,” I say, and he nods. “You wanted to stop anyone who might try to force me and my sisters into this if they found out we’re the real deal.”
“Honestly, I’ve been waiting for you to figure it out. With all of your…powers…I thought one of you would be able to use your ESP or whatever to discover the truth about my radio silence.”
“I tried, believe me,” I say, resigned. For months after he broke up with me, I performed elaborate card spreads, scryed, and asked my clairvoyant sisters to reach into the void searching for answers. “Nothing worked. The universe didn’t want me to know.”
“Mama Nightengale.” He snorts softly. “I asked if she could cloak you to hide your gifts from anyone searching for them. It must have screwed up your mojo in finding me as well. It worked for a while, but with all the growth and expansion your shop is undergoing, you’ve shown up on someone’s radar. ”
The surprises keep coming. No wonder I couldn’t get answers—a certain voodoo priestess was veiling the truth from me. “She’s in on this?”
“I needed help—supernatural help—to protect you.” A sheepish look. “I should have told you right from the start. I just…”
I put a finger to his lips. The time for recriminations is over. “What’s done is done. How do we stop them?”
The corners of his lips rise. He strokes my hair. “You’re always so beautiful, Autumn, but in the starlight, it’s like you’re glowing.”
Distraction. He’s trying to get me off-topic so I won’t worry. So I won’t decide to go head-to-head with this insidious group inside the government.
It works as his fingers touch my face, graze my cheek, my chin. His gaze drops to my lips…
Love feels like the softest, coziest blanket ever.
Quinn’s energy wraps me in it and a supernova goes off in my heart.
9
Blood rushes in my ears. Time and space seem to freeze. My senses go on overdrive.
The feel of Quinn’s fingers on my skin brings back too many memories, all of them colliding in my brain. Outside of our little bubble on top of the hill, I hear cars on the highway, the sound of nighttime insects singing their last hurrah before winter. The smell of dried grass and pine needles fills my nostrils.
I remind myself to breathe. Part of me believes him. The other part—the skeptical one—wants to laugh. He can’t be serious, right? This is a joke, isn’t it? The government wants to use witches for intelligence work? It has some super-secret program for us?
Quinn’s about to kiss me, and I want him to, but I freeze for a heartbeat, a weird sensation causing the world to spin madly. He sees my hesitation and the spell between us breaks.
That sad smile makes another appearance. “It’s crazy, isn’t it?”
A strained chuckle leaves my lips, and I playfully punch him, reaching for anything to relieve the anxiety flooding my body. The dizziness grows worse and I flop on my back, acting as if I’m stargazing. “You had me going for a moment,” I say.
He glances skyward as if asking for help, and then rests on his elbow to look at me. “I’m telling the truth. I left to investigate Charlie’s death and I quit talking to you in order to protect you. I’m not sure it was the right decision, and I’ve wrestled with it every day since.”
The skeptic falls silent. My heart expands. I shift my focus from his face and stare up at the Milky Way.
I wish I could ask the stars what I’m supposed to do with this information. All these years, and this distance between us, and they haven’t changed at all. They’ve been my constant companions, like my sisters, and I know that long after I’m gone, they’ll be the same for those who come after me.
“Tell me all of it,” I say quietly. “Every detail. About PNR Labs and the group Charlie was investigating.”
He teases a lock of hair from my cheek, rubbing the strands between his fingers. “The person who reached out to me put me on a trail of breadcrumbs. It revealed Charlie disappeared in Alaska, probably killed because he knew something he shouldn’t. Someone no one would suspect. It took years to track all the possibilities, but whatever he found, it must be big.”
“And it’s tied to the PNR magick program?”
A nod.
I have to take a moment to digest this. “Why couldn’t you tell me? I am an expert at magick, you know. I could’ve helped.”
He rolls onto his back again. “It was too dangerous. Still is. All I have is circumstantial evidence, and dragging you into it would throw up a red flag to PNR if anyone caught us. The problem is proving it, and the fact it cost him his life. I’m one man against someone with deep pockets and a lot riding on the line. Possibly the very government itself. I have no idea how deep the roots run. I have to be extremely careful that I don’t show my cards before I know how to bring those responsible for Charlie’s death to justice.”
“I understand that, but not why you couldn’t tell me what was going on. It would have made everything so different, so much…easier.”
It’s not exactly the word I’m searching for—nothing about this would’ve been easier—but understanding what he was doing certainly would have put a different spin on it for me.
I feel the brush of his hand as we lay side by side. “You’re not one to sit idly by and let others protect you, Autumn, but getting involved in any capacity puts a target on your back. Your sisters, too.” His fingers intertwine with mine gently. “My contact told me what the group would do to my family and friends if they suspected I was onto them. There was no way I could tell you about that.”
A wave of his fear from that time washes over me. I feel sick to my stomach.
At war with myself as well as him, I look at him, my eyes burning with unshed tears. I swore a long time ago I’d never cry over him again, and yet now I want to for the lost time. For a boy who didn’t know what he was doing but had to do it anyway.
“My goodness, what a very scary, very lonely thing for you to embark on. All of it—discovering these surreptitious groups and trying to protect us from them. I think I understand you couldn’t tell any of us what was going on, but now I know and I’m going to help you.”
“I don’t know how you can.”
Really? The government wants to use me as a weapon and Quinn doubts I can figure out the truth about his brother’s death? “I caught a leaf from my favorite maple today, and was thinking of using it to figure out why you weren’t t
elling me the truth, but now? We can use it to try and contact Charlie’s spirit tonight, ask the whereabouts of his body and what he got himself into. If anyone knows what happened, it’s him. Winter can help, too.”
I see his chest expand. His hand goes behind my head and pulls me to him. Our lips touch.
The warmth of his mouth is too sweet, too good. I press myself against him, reveling in the remembered sensations of loving Quinn.
Down at our feet, Sirius whines. I hear a motor slowing on the highway, the kick of gravel as it pulls into the farm’s drive. I know the gate is closed, and I’m so lost in Quinn’s kiss, I half-ignore the sound of the engine cutting off, car doors opening and closing.
Sirius growls this time and Quinn breaks the kiss. My heart is beating like I sprinted a mile and I glance toward the farmhouse.
Down at the bottom of the hill and across from the house itself, I see the vehicle—a black SUV. There are dark shadows moving, jumping the fence, and spreading out across the yard.
Quinn shifts me aside so he can roll onto his stomach and watch.
“Who’s that?” I ask.
“No one good.” He touches my back. “Stay down. They don’t know we’re here.”
I think maybe it’s just kids come to steal pumpkins, but that vehicle looks an awful lot like the one we saw earlier. “It’s Watson, isn’t it?”
“Possibly, or the group I’ve been investigating.”
My pulse hammers. “Why are they here now?”
Sirius stands and I gently command him to lay once more. He obeys, and Quinn whispers, “I have a feeling they’re reconnoitering the place.”
“For what?”
Two of the men in black move to the house, walking the perimeter. Another heads toward the acres of Christmas trees. A fourth scurries toward the barn. “They don’t realize anyone’s here, and they’re looking for something.”
“What should we do?”
He glances at me. “We aren’t doing anything. I’m going to sneak down there and see if I can figure out who they are.”
“I’m going with you.”
He grips my hand. Hard. “No, you’re not. As long as they don’t notice we’re here, you’re safe. I need you to stay with Sirius. If anything happens to me, you sneak through the woods to Conjure and call the police.”
Of Stars and Spells Page 7