by Susan Faludi
In 1986, while . . .: 1986 Gallup Poll; Barbara Ehrenreich, “The Next Wave,” Ms., July/August 1987, p. 166; Sarah Harder, “Flourishing in the Mainstream: The U.S. Women’s Movement Today,” The American Woman 1990–91, p. 281. Also see 1989 Yankelovich Poll: 71 percent of black women said feminists have been helpful to women, compared with 61 percent of white women. A 1987 poll by the National Women’s Conference Commission found that 65 percent of black women called themselves feminists, compared with 56 percent of white women.
Other signs of . . .: For increase in violent pornography, see, for example, April 1986 study in the Attorney General’s Commission on Pornography, Final Report, pp. 1402–3.
More subtle indicators . . .: Sally Steenland, “Women Out of View: An Analysis of Female Characters on 1987–88 TV Programs,” National Commission on Working Women, November 1987. Mystery fiction survey was conducted by Sisters in Crime and presented at the 1988 Mystery Writers of America conference; additional information comes from personal interview in May 1988 with the group’s director, mystery writer Sara Paretsky. On popular music: Alice Kahn, “Macho—the Second Wave,” San Francisco Chronicle, Sept. 16, 1990, Sunday Punch section, p. 2. On Andrew Dice Clay: Craig Maclnnis, “Comedians Only a Mother Could Love,” Toronto Star, May 20, 1990, p. C6; Valerie Scher, “Clay’s Idea of a Punch Line Is a Belch After a Beer,” San Diego Union and Tribune, Aug. 17, 1990, P. C1. On Rush Limbaugh: Dave Matheny, “Morning Rush Is a Gas,” San Francisco Examiner, Jan. 2, 1991, p. C1. On American Women in Radio & TV: Betsy Sharkey, “The Invisible Woman,” Adweek, July 6, 1987, p. 4.
The backlash line claims . . .: Data from Children’s Defense Fund. See also Ellen Wojahm, “Who’s Minding the Kids?” Savvy, Oct. 1987, p. 16; “Child Care: The Time Is Now,” Children’s Defense Fund, 1987, pp. 8–10.
“I myself . . .”: Rebecca West, The Clarion, Nov. 14, 1913, cited in Cheris Kramarae and Paula A. Treichler, A Feminist Dictionary (London: Pandora Press, 1985) p. 160.
The meaning of the word “feminist” The Feminist Papers: From Adams to de Beauvoir, ed. by Alice S. Rossi (New York: Bantam Books, 1973) p. xiii. For discussion of historical origins of term feminism, see Karen Offen, “Defining Feminism: A Comparative Historical Approach,” in Signs: Journal of Women in Culture and Society, 1988, 14, no. 1, pp. 119–57.
I AM NOT A BARBIE DOLL Carol Hymowitz and Michaele Weissman, A History of Women in America (New York: Bantam Books, 1978) p. 341.
CHAPTER TWO. MAN SHORTAGES AND BARREN WOMBS
“The picture that has emerged . . .”: Bill Barol, “Men Aren’t Her Only Problem,” Newsweek, Nov. 23, 1987, p. 76.
Four-fifths of them . . .: Shere Hite, Women and Love: A Cultural Revolution in Progress (New York: Knopf, 1987) pp. 41–42.
The Washington Post even . . .: “Things Getting Worse for Hite,” San Francisco Chronicle, Nov. 14, 1987, p. C9.
“Characteristically grandiose . . .”: Claudia Wallis, “Back Off, Buddy,” Time, Oct. 12, 1987, p. 68.
And Hite specifically . . .: Hite, Women and Love, pp. 774–78.
“I have given heart . . .”: Hite, Women and Love, pp. 79, 12, 96, 99, 39.
Psychologist Dr. Srully . . .: Dan Collins, “Is He Handing Readers a Line?” New York Daily News, July 19, 1987, p. 4.
His conclusion . . .: Dr. Srully Blotnick, Otherwise Engaged: The Private Lives of Successful Career Women (New York: Penguin Books, 1985) p. 316.
In his 1985 book . . .: Ibid., pp. viii, xi, 265, 278, 323.
“In fact,” he wrote . . .: Ibid., p. 278.
He took some swipes . . .: Ibid., pp. 323–24.
On a shoestring budget . . .: Ibid., p. xiii.
And the “Dr.” . . .: Collins, “Is He Handing,” p. 4.
After his interview, Collins . . .: Personal interview with Dan Collins, Nov. 1989.
Finally, a year later . . .: Collins, “Is He Handing,” p. 4.
But the news of . . .: “Secret of a Success,” Time, Aug. 3, 1987, p. 61.
As Gerald Howard . . .: Ibid., p. 61.
“People I’ve dealt with . . .”: Personal interview with Martin O’Connell, 1988.
And results that didn’t . . .: Marilyn Power, “Women, the State and the Family in the U.S.: Reaganomics and the Experience of Women,” Women and Recession, ed. by Jill Rubery (New York: Routledge & Kegan Paul, 1988) p. 153.
The Public Health Service . . .: Michael Specter, “Panel Claims Censorship on Abortion,” San Francisco Chronicle, Dec. 11, 1989, p. A1.
“Most social research . . .”: Kingsley Davis, Human Society(New York: The Macmillan Co., 1961 edition [original ed.: 1948]) p. 393.
Her “angle” . . .: Personal interview with Lisa Marie Petersen, Nov. 1989.
“The marriage market . . .”: Lisa Marie Petersen, “They’re Falling in Love Again, Say Marriage Counselors,” Stamford(Conn.) Advocate, Feb. 14, 1986, p. A1.
In no time . . .: Personal interview with Neil Bennett, June 1986.
At the very time . . .: By 1987, just a year later, the gap was down to 1.7 years, compared with 2.2 years in 1963. See “Advance Report of Final Marriage Statistics,” 1986, 1987, National Center of Health Statistics. In 1986, nearly one-fourth of brides were older than their grooms, up from 16 percent in 1970. National Center of Health Statistics, unpublished table, 1986.
That study, an October . . .: Robert Schoen and John Baj, “Impact of the Marriage Squeeze in Five Western Countries,” Sociology and Social Research, Oct. 1985, 70: no. 1, pp. 8–19.
Princeton professors . . .: Susan Faludi, “The Marriage Trap,” Ms., July/August 1987, p. 62.
Coale, asked about it later . . .: Personal interview with Ansley Coale, June 1986.
She decided to . . .: Personal interviews with Jeanne Moorman, June 1986, May 1988, September 1989.
The results . . .: Jeanne E. Moorman, “The History and the Future of the Relationship Between Education and Marriage,” U.S. Bureau of the Census, Dec. 1, 1986.
In June 1986, Moorman wrote . . .: Letter to Neil Bennett from Jeanne Moorman, June 20, 1986.
Then, in August . . .: Ben Wattenberg, “New Data on Women, Marriage,” Newspaper Enterprise Association, Aug. 27, 1986.
“I understand from Ben . . .”: Letter from Neil Bennett to Jeanne Moorman, Aug. 29, 1986.
(Bennett refuses to discuss. . .): Personal interview, Nov. 1989. Bloom also declined to comment.
At the same time, in an op-ed piece . . .: Neil G. Bennett and David E. Bloom, “Why Fewer Women Marry,” Advertising Age, Jan. 12, 1987, p. 18.
“I believe this reanalysis . . .”: Letter from Robert Fay to Neil Bennett, March 2, 1987.
“Things have gotten . . .”: Letter from Neil Bennett to Jeanne Moorman, March 3, 1987.
Three and a half years . . .: Felicity Barringer, “Study on Marriage Patterns Revised, Omitting Impact on Women’s Careers,” New York Times, Nov. 11, 1989, p. 9.
As a simple check . . .: “Marital Status and Living Arrangements,” U.S. Bureau of the Census, Series P-20, 410, March 1985. In addition, in the broader not-currently-married population (a classification that includes divorced and widowed people as well), there were 1.2 million more men than women between twenty-five and thirty-four.
If anyone faced . . .: Ibid. Still-younger men faced a similar problem: between the ages of fifteen and twenty-four, there were 112 single men for every 101 women.
The proportion of never-married women . . .: U.S. Bureau of the Census, September 1975, Series A-160-171, and September 1988, Table 3.
If one looks at never-married . . .: Current Population Reports, Series P-20, 410, Table 1, U.S. Bureau of the Census; “Special Report: Marital Characteristics,” Table 1, 1950 Census of the Population, U.S. Bureau of the Census; Ellen Kay Trimberger, “Single Women and Feminism in the 1980s,” June 1987 paper, National Women’s Studies Association.
In fact, the only place . . .: “Marital Status and Living Arrangements,” March 1985.
A massive study . .
.: The Cosmopolitan Report: The Changing Life Course of American Women, Battelle Memorial Institute, Human Affairs Research Center (Seattle: The Hearst Corporation, 1986).
The 1985 Virginia Slims . . .: The 1985 Virginia Slims American Women’s Opinion Poll, The Roper Organization, Inc., p. 13.
In the 1989 “New Diversity” . . .: “New Diversity,” Significance Inc. and Langer Associates, 1989.
The 1990 Virginia . . .: The 1990 Virginia Slims Opinion Poll, p. 51.
A 1986 national survey . . .: Pamela Redmond Satran, “Forever Single?” Glamour, Feb. 1986, p. 336.
And a 1989 Louis Harris poll . . .: “‘Mad Housewives’ No Longer,” San Jose Mercury News, Feb. 10, 1989, p. C5.
A review of fourteen years . . .: Norval D. Glenn and Charles N. Weaver, “The Changing Relationship of Marital Status to Reported Happiness,” Journal of Marriage and the Family, 50 (May 1988): 317-324.
A 1985 Woman’s Day survey . . .: Martha Weinman Lear, “The Woman’s Day Survey: How Many Choices Do Women Really Have?” Woman’s Day, Nov. 11, 1986, p. 109.
The cohabitation rate . . .: Martha Farnsworth Riche, “The Postmarital Society,” American Demographics, Nov. 1988, p. 23.
When the federal government . . .: Ibid., p. 25; “One-Third of Single Women in the 20s Have Been Pregnant,” San Jose Mercury News, June 1, 1986, p. A6.
Other demographic studies . . .: Arland Thornton and Deborah Freedman, “The Changing American Family,” Population Bulletin, Population Reference Bureau Inc., 38, no. 4 (October 1983): 12.
A 1982 study of three thousand . . .: Jacqueline Simenauer and David Carroll, Singles: The New Americans (New York: Simon & Schuster, 1982) p. 15.
“What is going to happen . . .”: Alan T. Otten, “Deceptive Picture: If You See Families Staging a Comeback, It’s Probably a Mirage,” The Wall Street Journal, Sept. 25, 1986, p. 1.
In the mid-’80s . . .: Personal interviews with dating and matchmaking service organizations in New York, San Jose, San Francisco, and Chicago, June 1986.
In an analysis of 1,200 ads . . .: Keay Davidson, “Sexual Freedom Will Survive Bush, Researchers Say,” San Francisco Examiner, Nov. 13, 1988, p. A2.
When Great Expectations . . .: Great Expectations 1988 Survey Results, Jan. 29, 1988, pp. 1, 3.
“Being married,” the . . .: Jessie Bernard, The Future of Marriage (New Haven: Yale University Press, 1982 edition) p. 25.
“There are few findings . . .”: Ibid., pp. 16-17.
“All this business . . .”: Personal interview with Ronald C. Kessler, 1988.
The mental health data . . .: See, for example, the following: Bernard, Future of Marriage, pp. 306, 308; Joseph Veroff, Richard A. Kulka, and Elizabeth Douvan, The Inner American: A Self-Portrait from 1957 to 1976 (New York: Basic Books, 1981); Walter R. Gove, “The Relationship Between Sex Roles, Marital Status, and Mental Illness,” Social Forces, 51 (Sept. 1972): 34–44; Walter R. Gove, “Sex, Marital Status and Psychiatric Treatment: A Research Note,” Social Forces, 58 (Sept. 1979): 89–93; Ronald C. Kessler, R. L. Brown, and C. L. Broman, “Sex Differences in Psychiatric Help-Seeking: Evidence from Four Large-scale Surveys,” Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 22 (March 1981): 49–63; Kay F. Schaffer, Sex-Role Issues in Mental Health (Reading, Mass.: Addison-Wesley Publishing Co., 1980) pp. 132–59; Blayne Cutler, “Bachelor Party,” American Demographics, Feb. 1989, pp. 22–26.
In the Wall Street Journal . . .: Joann S. Lublin, “Staying Single: Rise in Never-Marrieds Affects Social Customs and Buying Patterns,” The Wall Street Journal, May 28, 1986, p. 1.
A thirty-five-year-old woman . . .: Karen S. Peterson, “Stop Asking Why I’m Not Married,” USA Today, July 9, 1986, p. D4.
In a Los Angeles Times story . . .: Elizabeth Mehren, “Frustrated by the Odds, Single Women Over 30 Seek Answers in Therapy,” Los Angeles Times, Nov. 30, 1986, Part VI, p. 1.
When Great Expectations . . .: Great Expectations Survey, 1987.
The Annual Study . . .: Mark Clements Research, Annual Study of Women’s Attitudes, 1987, 1986.
The year after . . .: Judith Waldrop, “The Fashionable Family,” American Demographics, March 1988, pp. 23–26.
“A new traditionalism . . .”: Jib Fowles, “Coming Soon: More Men than Women,” New York Times, June 5, 1988, III, p. 3.
“There’s not even going . . .”: Personal interview with Jib Fowles, June 1988.
In the 1980s, these “feminist-inspired” . . .: Marcia Cohen, The Sisterhood: The True Story of the Women Who Changed the World (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1988) p. 365.
Until her study . . .: Lenore J. Weitzman, The Divorce Revolution: The Unexpected Social and Economic Consequences for Women and Children in America (New York: The Free Press, 1985) p. 362.
“The major economic result . . .”: Ibid., pp. xiv, 13, 365. 35 Weitzman’s work does not . . .: Ibid., pp. 364,
The Divorce Revolution, Time . . .: Wallis, “Women Face the 90s,” p. 85.
“The impact of the divorce revolution . . .”: Mason, The Equality Trap, pp. 68, 53. Other examples include Diane Medved, The Case Against Divorce (New York: Donald L. Fine, 1989) and Mary Ann Glendon, Abortion and Divorce in Western Law (Cambridge, Mass.: Harvard University Press, 1987).
The 1970 California no-fault law . . .: Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, pp. 364–365, 41–42.
Weitzman argued that . . .: Ibid., pp. 358–362.
“The research shows . . .”: Ibid., p. xii.
In the summer of 1986 . . .: Personal interviews with Saul Hoffman, Greg Duncan, 1988, 1989, 1991. The “5000 Families” study, or the Panel Study of Income Dynamics, has been following a group of families since 1967. See Greg J. Duncan and Saul D. Hoffman, “Economic Consequences of Marital Instability,” Horizontal Equity, Uncertainty and Economic Well-Being (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1985) pp. 427–471.
Five years after . . .: The average living standard five years later is even better than during the marriage largely because so many women remarry men with higher incomes. For women who remain single, the living standard improves more slowly. Greg J. Duncan and Saul D. Hoffman, “A Reconsideration of the Economic Consequences of Martial Dissolution,” Demography, 22 (1985): 485.
“Weitzman’s highly publicized . . .”: Greg J. Duncan and Saul D. Hoffman, “What Are the Economic Consequences of Divorce?” Demography, 25, no. 4 (Nov. 1988): 641.
The Wall Street Journal Alan J. Otten, “People Patterns,” Wall Street Journal, Dec. 12, 1988, p. B1.
“They are just wrong . . .”: Personal interview, Dec. 1988.
Confirmation of Duncan . . .: Suzanne Bianchi, “Family Disruption and Economic Hardship,” Survey of Income and Program Participation, U.S. Bureau of the Census, March 1991, Series P-70, no. 23.
“[Weitzman’s] numbers are . . .”: Personal interview with Suzanne Bianchi, March 1991.
(And her response rate. . .): Duncan and Hoffman, “Economic Consequences,” p. 644, ff. 2; Arland Thornton, “The Fragile Family,” Family Planning Perspectives, 18, no. 5 (Sept./Oct. 1986): 244.
“We were amazed . . .”: Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, p. 409.
And she strongly . . .: Ibid., p. 383.
(A later 1990. . .): David L. Kirp, “Divorce, California-Style,” San Francisco Examiner, Dec. 12, 1990, p. A19.
National data . . .: “Child Support and Alimony, 1983,” U.S. Bureau of the Census, Series P-32, no. 14. The Census Bureau stopped collecting alimony data in the 1920s, then resumed in 1978.
Yet her own data . . .: Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, p. 177.
Her other point . . .: Ibid., pp. xii, 358.
The example Weitzman gives . . .: Ibid., pp. 80-81.
Between 1978 and 1985 . . .: Robins, “Child Support Award Amounts,” pp. 6-7; Saul Hoffman, “Divorce and Economic Well Being: The Effects on Men, Women and Children,” Delaware Lawyer, Spring 1987, p. 21.
Divorced men are now more . . .: Hewlett, A Lesser Life, p. 63; Deborah L. Rhode, “Rhode on Res
earch,” Institute for Research on Women and Gender Newsletter, Stanford University, XIII, no. 4 (Summer 1989): 4.
As of 1985, only half . . .: “Law Compels Sweeping Changes in Child Support,” New York Times, Nov. 25, 1988, p. A8. The failure to pay has nothing to do with the incomes of ex-husbands. In fact, the more money a father makes, the less likely he is to pay support. Money is not the only form of sustenance that ex-husbands withhold from their children: over half of divorced fathers rarely or never see their children, the National Children’s Survey finds. See “Bad News for the Baby Boom,” American Demographics, Feb. 1989, p. 36; Hochschild, The Second Shift, pp. 248-49.
And studies on child support . . .: Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, pp. 298-99.
As sociologist Arlie . . .: Hochschild, Second Shift, pp. 250-51.
A 1988 federal audit . . .: Pat Wingert, “And What of Deadbeat Dads?” Newsweek, Dec. 19, 1988, p. 66.
Instead, surveys in several . . .: Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, pp. 48, 106; Allan R. Gold, “Sex Bias Is Found Pervading Courts,” New York Times, July 2, 1989, p. 14.
“The concept of ‘equality’ . . .”: Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, p. 366.
If the wage gap . . .: Marian Lief Palley, “The Women’s Movement in Recent American Politics,” The American Woman 1987–88, p. 174; Greg J. Duncan and Willard Rodgers, “Lone Parents: The Economic Challenge of Changing Family Structures,” Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development, November 1987. Further, there would be fewer divorces if there was less poverty: The likelihood of divorce is three to five times higher among couples who live in poverty. As Jessie Bernard observed, “We could do more to stabilize marriage by providing this income than by any other single measure.” See Bernard, The Future of Marriage, pp. 168–69.