Without You

by Kelly Elliott

  Luke: I needed to forget about some shit and just relax and have a good time this weekend. Abigail asked if I wanted to go, and I said yes.

  Me: Okay. I’ll just have to let Lex know that I can’t make it.

  Luke: Sorry, dude. I’m coming back tomorrow. I’m only staying one night. That’s all I can take of Abigail. She’s an awesome fuck, but damn, she gets on my nerves.

  “Will? Are you still there?”

  I sighed. “Sorry, Lib. Luke texted me to say he was with Abigail at the coast for the night.”

  “Who’s Abigail?”

  “His fuck buddy.”

  Libby sucked in a breath of air, and I cursed inside.

  Shit.

  Luke hadn’t wanted Libby to know about Abigail, and I’d just fucked up.

  “What?”

  Great. Now, what am I going to say?

  “Lib, sweetheart, I’d better call Lex and let her know I can’t make it.”

  Silence.

  “Lib? Libby?” I swore I could hear her crying. “Honey, are you okay?”

  “I’m fine. Tell Alex I said hey.” Libby hung up without so much as a good-bye.

  Ah shit.

  I pulled up my last text message from Lex and read it.

  Damn, I wanted to see her so bad.

  Lex: My body is aching for you.

  Me: Hey, baby. I have bad news. My truck broke down, and Luke is out of town this weekend.

  She instantly responded.

  Lex: No! No. No. No. Will, I haven’t seen you in over a month. I was looking forward to this weekend.

  Me: I know, Lex. Believe me, I’m just as disappointed. Can you FaceTime?

  Lex: Yep. Grace isn’t here, and she won’t be back for another hour. I think she is going to some party tonight.

  Me: Give me a minute.

  Lex: Hurry!

  I quickly ran back up to my dorm room. I grabbed my iPad and called her. The moment I saw her beautiful face, my dick was harder than a rock.

  Fuck, I want her. I reached down and adjusted myself.

  “Hey.” She giggled.

  “Hey.”

  “So, I take it since Luke is gone, we can…play.”

  Oh, Jesus. I’d never seen Lex get herself off, and I knew I would come the moment she did.

  “I’m game if you’re sure Grace won’t be back soon.”

  She nodded her head. “Will, I’m so horny that I have to, and I won’t do it unless you’re with me. If this is what we have to do, then this is what we have to do. Hold on though. Let me lock the door.”

  She jumped up, locked the door, and then sat back down on her bed. She bit down on her lower lip, and I let out a moan.

  “Get undressed, Lex.”

  I could see her chest heaving up and down. She somehow propped up her iPad and began getting undressed. When she took her bra off, I sucked in a breath of air.

  She pushed her panties down and said, “I’m naked. Now, you.”

  I jumped up and stripped naked in ten seconds flat. “Touch your breast, Lex.”

  She used her right hand and began playing with her nipple. “Oh God, Will, I need to feel you. I’m going insane.”

  I reached down and began stroking my dick. I needed to go slow, or I would come before I wanted to.

  “Jesus, Lex. Touch yourself, baby. Tell me how it feels.”

  Lex moved her hand down and let out a gasp as she began touching herself. “Will, I’m so worked up. It’s not going to take long.”

  I began stroking my dick faster. “Lex…talk to me, baby.”

  I watched as she took herself to the edge. It was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.

  “I’m…so…close. It feels…so…good,” she moaned.

  She began making noises, and I was fighting like hell not to come as I watched her body arch back in pleasure.

  “Lex, baby, I’m dying over here, watching you make yourself feel good.”

  She shook her head. Her eyes were closed, and she began saying my name. “Will…oh God. Will, move faster.”

  I swallowed hard. “Baby, I’m not the one touching you.”

  She jerked her head forward and looked at the screen. “No. I want to see you stroking yourself faster, Will.”

  Fuck me.

  I moved, so she could see me while I watched her.

  “Yes. Oh God, yes,” she said.

  “Lex, are you close?”

  “Faster, Will.”

  I began stroking my dick faster. Fuck. I was about to come.

  “Shit,” I hissed through my teeth.

  “Oh yeah, I’m about to come, Will. I want to see you come.”

  That was when I lost control. Trying to hold the fucking iPad and jerk off was not an easy task. I felt it building, and I finally had to let it go and come.

  “Oh, Lex…I’m gonna come, baby.”

  I looked down and saw my cum exploding out as I looked at the screen.

  Lex yelled out, “Will…oh my God. Yes…yes, I’m coming. Don’t move your hand!”

  I kept it still, so she could see me, and I watched as she rode out her orgasm. I could hear her panting as she slowly came back down from her high.

  “Lex, I have to go clean up. Give me a second.”

  “Okay. Need to get dressed…really…quick.”

  I jumped up, headed to our bathroom, and cleaned off my dick. I ran back into the room and got dressed. I picked up my iPad and waited for Lex. She flopped down on the bed and picked up the iPad.

  She had a huge smile on her face. “That was awesome.”

  I laughed and nodded my head. “Yeah, it was.”

  “I think we are going to have to FaceTime more often.” She raised her eyebrows.

  “I miss you, Lex.”

  She closed her eyes and whispered, “I miss you, too, Will. When can you try to come to Austin again?”

  “After tonight? Next weekend!”

  Lex giggled and looked away. I heard the door open and saw Lex smile at someone.

  “Hey, Grace.”

  “Hey, bitch. Who are you talking to?”

  Lex looked back at me. “Will.”

  Grace dropped down on the bed next to Lex. “Hey, William. Um…why aren’t you here?”

  “Truck broke down.”

  Grace’s smile disappeared. “Where is Luke?”

  I let out a sigh. “Port Aransas with Abigail.”

  Grace made a funny face. “Who is Abigail?”

  I shook my head. “A friend of his.”

  Grace raised her eyebrows. “Huh. So, is she a friend-friend or a friend-friend?”

  Shit. Luke is gonna kill me. “A friend with benefits.”

  “Bastard,” Lex and Grace said at the same time.

  “Does Libby know about her?” Lex asked.

  “Uh…she does now since I slipped tonight and said something about Luke being with Abigail.”

  Grace shook her head. “Damn men.” She got up and walked away.

  I heard Grace say in the background, “Lex, you can go to the party with me, if you want.”

  Lex frowned and then attempted to smile.

  “I’m so sorry, Lex. I’ll come next weekend, I swear.”

  “Promise?”

  I smiled softly. “I promise, baby. Why don’t you go with Grace to the party? Go have fun. Isn’t this what your dad wanted? For you to experience life at UT?”

  She rolled her eyes and sighed. “Grace and I both hate it here and wish our parents hadn’t talked us into not bringing at least one car this semester.” She shook her head. “I don’t like it, Will. I want to be with you.”

  My heart physically hurt from hearing her say that she hated UT. “We’ll be together next weekend, Lex. Now, go get ready and have fun tonight. Call me when you get back to your dorm, okay?”

  She nodded her head. “The party is here in the building, so it shouldn’t be that bad. It’s someone’s birthday, and his friends are having it in the commons area.”

  “Perfect! That
is the kind of party I don’t have to worry about.”

  Lex giggled. “Are you sure? You don’t mind?”

  “Lex, of course I don’t mind. I love you. Have fun.”

  “Will, please try to come next weekend. My heart is hurting from not seeing you. Promise me, you’ll try to come.”

  I smiled. “I promise, I’ll be there next weekend even if I have to rent a car to get there.”

  She smiled that beautiful smile of hers. Then, it faded. I wished I knew what she was thinking. The soft features of her face seemed to be tense, and her blue eyes didn’t have the same normal sparkle. It was almost like she was nervous.

  “Lex, it’s going to be okay. We’re going to be okay.”

  She began chewing on her lower lip. “Have you…I mean…is there anyone there you might be—”

  “Lex, stop this. There is no one, and there will never be anyone besides you.”

  “What if Abigail has a friend and…”

  I let out a sigh. “Lex, please don’t do this again. I’m not interested in anyone but you.”

  She smiled and tilted her head. “Promise me?”

  I laughed. “I promise you. Now, go have fun. Don’t take any drinks from anyone.”

  “Yes, Dad! I’ll call you when we get back up to the room.”

  “Sounds good. Bye, Lex. I love you.”

  “Bye, Will. I love you more!”

  I closed out of FaceTime and fell back onto the bed as I let out a long sigh. I made a note in my phone to make sure my truck was fixed by Thursday and to make hotel reservations for next weekend. I was going to skip my class on Thursday and head to Austin early. I couldn’t wait any longer. I had to see Lex.

  A strange feeling washed over my body, and I sat up. I opened up my text messages. I was about to text Lex and ask her not to go to the party, but I decided I was being a jealous fool. I stripped out of my clothes and made my way to the bathroom where I took a hot shower.

  I got dressed in boxers and a T-shirt and made my way over to my bed. I sat down and looked at the clock. I set the alarm on my phone for one in the morning. If I didn’t hear from Lex by then, I would call her.

  I lay down and shut my eyes. “Lex…” I whispered before letting sleep take over. I felt myself quickly drifting off into a dream. All I could see was blue eyes staring into mine.

  Grace and I walked into the commons area and looked around. We knew no one. I had met a few people, and Grace had actually gone out on a date with one guy. She had come home four hours later and professed she was giving up on all men.

  “So, who is the birthday boy?” I shouted over the music.

  Grace shrugged her shoulders. “Beats me. Want something to drink?”

  I looked around to see what everyone was drinking.

  Beer. How in the world are they allowed to serve beer?

  “If the R.A. catches us, we can get into a lot of trouble, Grace,” I said.

  She shrugged her shoulders and looked around. “No one else seems to be worried about it. I heard someone say he was gone for the weekend, so that’s why they threw the party here.”

  I glanced around again. “I guess I’ll have a beer. Seems to be what everyone is drinking. Make sure no one touches it!” I shouted.

  Grace laughed and walked toward the other side of the room. I stood there and looked around. The French doors were open, and a group of people were dancing outside.

  A bit later, Grace tapped my shoulder and handed me a beer. “Let’s go outside. I feel like dancing.”

  I followed Grace outside. She instantly began moving her hips, and about ten guys focused on her. Three came up, one right after another, and asked her to dance, but she turned each one down.

  “You weren’t kidding when you said you’ve given up on men.”

  She shook her head. “Nope. I’m done. D.O.N.E.”

  Then, “Turn Down for What” by DJ Snake and Lil Jon started playing, and Grace really started dancing.

  “Will you dance with me?” someone asked while I was watching Grace dance.

  I didn’t even bother to look at the person. I shook my head and turned it a bit as I shouted, “No, thanks.”

  “I can’t believe you won’t even dance with the birthday boy.”

  Then, I recognized Blake’s voice. I spun around to see him standing there, wearing a silly birthday hat.

  I smiled and shook my head. “It’s your birthday? This is your party?” I let out a laugh.

  “Yes, ma’am. It’s my birthday, and I have to warn you. I’m feeling a bit tipsy.”

  Grace walked up and looked at Blake. “Hey, it’s the hot guy from our tour!”

  I instantly felt my cheeks warming up.

  Blake looked at her and then at me. “Hot guy, huh?”

  Grace laughed. “Yeah. You got a name?”

  “Grace, this is Blake Turner. Blake, this is my best friend and roommate, Grace Johnson.”

  Grace stared at me.

  “I ran into him at the café the other day.”

  She smiled and looked back at Blake. “Happy birthday, birthday boy!”

  Blake smiled big and pointed to Grace. “Dance with me?”

  Grace laughed. “Sure. Why the hell not?”

  I watched as Blake grabbed Grace’s hand and pulled her to where everyone was dancing. “Wiggle” by Jason Derulo began playing, and I watched as Grace and Blake danced close to each other. He was moving his hands all over Grace’s body, and for some reason, it was starting to irritate me. Grace turned and pushed her ass into Blake. As they moved together, he said something into her ear, and she began laughing.

  I looked away and pulled out my phone. Nothing from Will.

  Looking back out, Grace was facing Blake. They weren’t as close as they had been before, but talk about dirty dancing. I’d never in my life been jealous of Grace—with the exception of this very moment. I shook my head. I decided I was just missing Will, and I was mad and upset that I didn’t get to see him.

  I glanced around at everyone dancing, and my father’s voice popped in my head.

  Have fun, Alex. Just enjoy being young and experiencing new things.

  I downed my beer and walked back inside for another one. I ran into Chrissie, who was in my calculus class, and I hadn’t even known it until this last week. We talked for a bit while I finished my second beer. Then, Chrissie got us three Fireball shots each. I was starting to feel pretty good. I asked for another beer and decided I should go check on Grace.

  She’s probably making out with Blake.

  For some reason, that thought made my stomach upset.

  I stepped outside and took in a deep breath. I looked around and saw Grace talking to a girl and two guys, and neither guy was Blake.

  “Stupid Love” by Jason Derulo started playing.

  Someone must like this guy because they keep playing his songs.

  A hand was suddenly on my lower back, and it began guiding me to the middle of the dance floor. Somehow, I knew it was Blake. I turned to face him and smiled when I saw him.

  “You have to dance with me. It’s my birthday.”

  I pulled out my phone. It was twelve thirty. “I do believe your birthday was yesterday, Mr. Turner.”

  He tilted his head and raised his eyebrow at me. He put his hands on my waist and pulled me closer to him.

  Just have fun, Alex. Discover what’s out in the world besides Mason.

  I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or my slight attraction to Blake, but I wrapped my arms around him and began moving my hips against his. He smiled as he dug his fingers into me a bit more. We slowly moved to the beats of the song, and I closed my eyes as I wished I were dancing with Will.

  I felt a warm breath on my neck.

  “Are you thinking of your boyfriend, Alex?”

  I opened my eyes and looked at Blake’s lips. I instantly licked my lips, and Blake let out a moan.

  “If you are, he is one lucky son of a bitch.”

  I couldn’t eve
n think of anything to say, so I smiled. “I should probably head back up to my room. I think I drank too much.”

  Blake pulled me closer to him, and I felt his hard dick. He moved his lips to my ear. His hot breath was making me feel light-headed, and I was so confused by what I was feeling. I wanted Will so much, but being in Blake’s arms aroused me.

  “I want you to know what you do to me.”

  He moved his lips across my neck, not kissing me but just barely brushing them against my skin. My head was spinning, and when he stepped away, he was smiling. He knew what he had done to me. I was a weak and stupid idiot for letting him get to me like he had.

  I shook my head and walked away to find Grace.

  “Grace, I’m not feeling very well. I think I had too much to drink. I had three Fireballs.”

  “You had shots? With who, Alex?”

  “Um…a few girls from my calculus class. Grace, I’m not feeling well.”

  Grace pulled me to her side, and we made our way back into the commons area. Then, we headed to the elevator. Once we got into our room, I made a run for the bathroom. I hit the floor and began throwing up into the toilet.

  “Jesus H. Christ, Alex. How much did you drink?”

  I began crying as Grace handed me a warm washcloth. “Too much I guess.”

  Grace sat down on the side of the tub and sighed. “I’d say so, Alex. I knew the moment I saw you dancing all up on Blake that you must have had too much to drink.”

  I looked up at Grace. “What? I wasn’t all up on him.”

  Grace gave me a dirty look. “Please, Alex. I saw the way y’all were dancing. I almost walked over and pulled you away from him.”

  “Grace, I wasn’t doing anything. Blake respects the fact that I have a boyfriend.”

  “Uh-huh. That’s why he was pushing himself into you and running his lips along your neck.”

  I fell back onto my ass. “What the fuck, Grace? Should I dissect your dance with him when you had your ass all up on his dick?”

  Grace stood up and looked down at me. “The difference with that, Lex, is I’m not dating anyone.”

  She turned, walked out of the bathroom, and slammed the door shut. I sat there on the cold tile floor, trying to make sense out of everything. I got up and brushed my teeth. I decided I would think about it all in the morning when my head wasn’t fuzzy from alcohol.

  After making my way back into our room, I stripped out of my clothes, grabbed a shirt, and pulled it over my head. Grace was already in bed. I walked over to my bed, pulled the covers back, and crawled in bed.