by Blair Grey
RYDER: AN MC ROMANCE
The Steel Wings MC – Book #3
By Blair Grey
Copyright © 2019 by Blair Grey
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Chapter 1 – Ten Years Ago
Taylor
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Dear Diary,
Life is just as chaotic as ever, and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. I want to believe that things will get better, but it seems like they’re only getting worse.
Dad is just as angry as he’s always been, but it seems like he’s been taking it out on Mom more than usual. I’m not sure why. He gets mad when he’s with the MC, then he comes home and she’s the one who has to deal with it.
It scares me to hear the fights they have, and it’s even worse when she starts crying or asking him to stop, but he won’t. I just want to run away. There’s so many times I think about packing a bag and just getting the Hell out of here.
But where would I go?
The MC is everywhere. They know all the streets, all the back roads. They know who I am, who my father is. And, there’s no chance I would be able to get out of here without him putting the entire crew on high alert, telling them to find me and bring me home.
I don’t even want to think about what would happen if it came to that point. Dad’s already so hard on Mom as it is. And me, for that matter. I’m not even sure we would survive him being pissed off at me for running away.
But it’s still so tempting.
If only there was a way for me to run and never be found. If I had the right people on my team – if there was a way for me to find someone who would go with me and help me – then I know I’d be okay. I can’t do it alone, and I know it.
I’m pretty sure Dad knows it, too, or why would he be such a monster to me and Mom? It’s not like we ever did anything to ask for it.
I’m not the only one who feels this way, either. I hardly dare write it for fear Dad’s going to find it and use what I put down against Mom, but I know she wants to leave. She’s so sick of his shit. I don’t know why she even bothers staying.
But then, of course I know why.
She knows she’s just as stuck here as I am. She knows there’s no way we would actually be able to get out of here and be okay. If Dad didn’t track us down in one way or another and have us brought back here, he would make sure we died on the road. There’s no doubt about that.
He'd have someone from the MC after us in a heartbeat. They’d hunt us down like animals and put an end to our miserable existence. And, to make matters worse, I have a feeling they’d get praised for it when they got back to the clubhouse and told my father what they did.
It’s sick to think they can get away with this. They can do whatever the hell they want simply because they’re part of the MC. I wish one of the other clubs around here would put them in their place. I would love nothing more than for Ryder to tell my father where he should go – and for my father to get his ass kicked and handed back to him on his way down there.
Isn’t that just another person I shouldn’t be talking about here? What would Dad do if he knew the feelings I’ve been having for the young prospect. On the other hand, I know I’m being stupid by having feelings for him, too. How the Hell do I justify to myself the fact I’m falling hard for a guy that’s in a motorcycle gang?
And the Steel Wings, no less. That should be crazy in every sense of the word. I hate MCs. I hate them all. I hate my father’s most of all, but that doesn’t change the fact that I really hate the rest of them, as well.
I don’t want this to be my life. I don’t want this to be normal for me. The thought of this being what I do with the rest of my life is enough to make me sick. So why the Hell do I think Ryder is so amazing? It really doesn’t make any sense. I can see that plain as day.
I paused, setting down my pen for a moment and staring up at the ceiling as I hoped for more to come to mind. I knew I had to be careful with what I put down in my diary. I wanted to believe it could be a safe place where I could record everything – from what I was feeling to what I was dreaming for in life and everything in between.
But, the fact of the matter was that things were a lot different. I knew my diary could easily be taken by my father at any time, and that he would be more than happy to flip through the pages and see what he could find.
I wanted to believe he wouldn’t care what I had to say, or what I was writing, but then, my father was a cruel and hard man, and it didn’t surprise me in the slightest to think he would go through even my most personal belongings to get what he was after.
Of course, the fact I wanted to run away – and the details I would record to make that happen – weren’t the only things that I refrained from putting down in my journal. No, there was another topic I wanted to record often, but one I was far too afraid to put down on paper for fear it would fall into the wrong hands.
And, that was exactly what I wanted to do with Ryder.
It wasn’t that I just wanted to run away from my life. I wanted Ryder to be the one to carry me out of the pit of despair I’d fallen into. I wanted him to sweep in and save the day. I wanted him to take me on the back of his bike and get as far away from here as possible.
More than anything, I wanted him to just step in and be the hero I needed. After all, it was next to impossible to think anything different about him now. He had been there through so much for me already.
He was the one who constantly stepped in and was there for me and my mother. I wasn’t sure what was going on – I wasn’t sure why he did what he did. But, there was part of me that knew the whys didn’t matter.
The truth was he was there, and that’s really all I had to know. He would take care of me, and that was the end of that.
But, I didn’t want him to just watch over us while we were in this terrifying situation. I wanted him to remove me from here and just put me on the back of his bike before riding off into the night. Forget riding off into the sunset and living a happy, carefree life full of love and happiness.
That was the sort of things that might happen in the movies, but it certainly didn’t happen to me. I wasn’t going to pretend otherwise. No, we would be on the run – though, I couldn’t imagine Ryder running from anything.
We would live our lives free from the control and hate of my father, and we would be okay. I almost dared to think I might be happy, though I wasn’t sure that was even possible considering the life I lived now. Nothing about my life was happy. Nothing except for Ryder, that is. I lived for the moments he was around, and I had a feeling he knew it, too.
He was always there for me. He knew what to say. He knew how to say it. He knew how to handle just about anything I asked. Ryder had such a way of putting my mind at ease, even though on the inside, I was terrified. He could say just the right thing that would let me know it would all work out somehow.
Though, I still wasn’t sure how that would be possible.
Things with my father were getting worse. The fight he had with my mother the night before was the worst one yet, and I had a feeling it wasn’t going to get any better from here.
Mom didn’t have the strength to fight back. She was much smaller than my father, and she was running out of emotional stamina, as well. I knew she had resolve. She would stand up to him for my sake until her dying day.
But, with the way things had been going with my father, I worried that her dying day might come far too soon. He could fly into such a terrible rage, it was almost as though he didn’t even know what it was he was doing.<
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Or, if he did, he certainly didn’t care. As much as it terrified me to think so, I wouldn’t have been surprised if he were to fly into a rage and kill us both – then order his men to take care of our bodies in the morning.
Shaking my head, I turned my attention back to my diary.
I guess it really doesn’t matter. My feelings for Ryder aren’t ever going to amount to anything, and I really should only focus on getting out of here however I can.
I know it’s what Mom wants. She’s just waiting for the right time. I-
“Taylor!” Mom’s voice cut into the room, breaking my train of thought and causing me to jump out of my seat.
“What?” I asked, unable to hide the panic in my voice.
“Get your things together. Ryder’s coming to pick us up,” she said quickly.
“My things?”
“Get as much as you can bring in just a couple small bags. Clothes, toiletries. Now!” my mother snapped back at me.
“Mom!” I called. “What’s going on?”
But she didn’t answer, disappearing down the hall and vanishing out of sight. I heard her open the door downstairs before Ryder’s voice joined hers in the hall. I had no idea what was going on, but I knew it couldn’t be good. There was a tension in the air that ran through the core of my being, sending a shiver down my spine.
I felt sick to my stomach, but I quickly obeyed. Something was going down tonight – there wasn’t any doubt in my mind about that. I didn’t know why Ryder was there, and I didn’t know what this would mean for me or my mother, but I knew not to argue with her.
I packed what I could into my backpack and slung it over my shoulder before heading out the door. I didn’t look back. Somehow, I had a feeling it would be the last time I would ever be in that room, but I didn’t care.
We had to get going. We had to run.
From what? I wasn’t sure.
But I knew without a doubt I didn’t want to find out.
Chapter 2
Ryder
I walked quickly through the hall and toward the stairs. I texted ahead to tell Katherine to make sure she and Taylor were both ready when I arrived, and I hoped she would be. We didn’t have much time, and the more distance I could put between us and the men who were coming, the better.
I hoped they would be at the door with their things by the time I arrived – but, I couldn’t give her more than a few minutes to get ready as I myself only had a few minutes.
As soon as I’d gotten the word to pick them up and get them to the safety of our chosen hotel, I hopped on my bike and headed right for the house. It hadn’t taken me more than fifteen minutes to get there from the bar, but I knew each minute was more time for an attack to break loose.
I hated not knowing where anyone was. I hated not knowing where even my own allies were or how we were going to reach them in time. The last thing I wanted was for things to get worse for Katherine and her daughter.
Hell, if I had to be perfectly honest about it, I knew it was Taylor I was most worried about. Sure, Katherine was the one who was in immediate danger being the old lady of this crazed man, but that didn’t mean his daughter wasn’t in just as much danger in her own right.
If he were to kill his wife – whether he did it himself or he had someone else do it, then there was little doubt in my mind Taylor would be next. After all, what better way to wipe his own slate clean and start over than to get rid of his family?
It was a sick thought, but it was a real possibility, and I wasn’t going to risk anything going down. I couldn’t. I had to take care of Taylor – and her mother. It wasn’t easy, but I didn’t sign up for easy when I pledged to be part of this club.
I knew what I was getting myself into, and I was okay with it. Before I joined the MC, my life lacked meaning. I wasn’t satisfied with anything I was doing, and I wasn’t happy with what I called my life, either. Hell, I just wasn’t happy, really.
I was ready for something to change, so when the opportunity arose for me to take a position within this MC, I jumped on it. I wanted more than anything to belong. I wanted to be part of the family. I wanted to show these men I could be part of their camaraderie. And I would do it, too.
Of course, getting into the Steel Wings MC wasn’t a walk in the park. I knew there was a long process of proving my worth to the club, and my loyalty, too. I had to show the men I wanted it more than anything. I was willing to dedicate everything for the sake of the club. I would put my life on the line. I’d do anything I had to do to make it happen.
I wanted that patch, that was for damn sure. I knew it would take time to earn it, and I was willing to put in the time to make it happen.
But, as I started my service in the MC, I soon realized I didn’t just do what I was told to do for the sake of earning my patch. No, there were times when I would personally invest in the mission beyond what it would do for my ranking within the club.
I tried not to let that happen. I knew I had to focus on my task and serving the MC more than anything else. But, then I was put in charge of watching Taylor – the daughter of Bud Willis – President of Death’s Door MC.
She was off limits in every sense of the word, but that didn’t stop me from developing more feelings for her than I wanted to admit. It was true. She was beautiful, she was charming, and she was kind. She was funny. But, there were just as many catches and red flags as there were positives.
The biggest one being the fact she was only sixteen years old. It didn’t matter who her father was – who she was tied to – the fact that she was just sixteen meant she was off limits no matter how much I wanted her. Nothing was going to change that.
There were a lot of rules I would break. There were a lot of things I’d let myself do if I knew I could get away with it. Hell, there were very few things I would stop and tell myself was a bad idea.
Life was meant to be an adventure, full of experiences and wild times. I didn’t worry about being in the world for a long time if it meant I would be there for a wild time, and I made choices that backed that belief.
But, when it came to other people, I knew I had to be more careful. Especially if I wanted that patch. I wasn’t going to do anything that could compromise the chance of me getting that patch sewn onto my vests and jackets. I wanted that place in the MC.
I wanted to be part of the team. More than just the one who was sent into these shitty missions. I wanted to be so much more than the guy who was easily disposable – part of the MC, yes, but the one who had to go first into situations like these to prove himself.
I wanted to show my President and everyone else in the MC that I was worthy of the title I bore. I wanted him and everyone else to see I meant it when I said I would give my life for the MC.
And, I would do anything to make that proof.
Even if it meant I would hang around with one of the most beautiful girls I’d ever seen and never be able to lay a finger on her. It was hard to be around Taylor and not think of all the things I wanted to do to her. I’d admit that to myself easily enough.
She was perfection itself. An angel in many senses, and she looked to me with those big, endearing eyes that told me she trusted me to take care of her and her mother both. She wasn’t going to fight me when I told her what to do. She would be right there with me, trusting I could take care of anything.
Besides the MC and all that I would do for them, Taylor was the one person who was on my mind the most. It was hard for me not to fantasize about her when I had a few minutes to myself – to think about all the things I’d want to do to her. To think about how I wanted her to feel me – to take me entirely. The things I wanted her to experience with me.
They were thoughts I had to shove out of my head as I walked into her house. There were more important things to worry about right now besides the things I wanted to do to this young woman, and I knew I had to focus.
I’d do the mission, sure, but it would be so much better if I were able to do it with a c
lear mind – a mind that wasn’t tainted with the things I wanted to do to Taylor.
Even if I was sure she felt the same toward me.
Taylor wasn’t one for flirting, but then, she certainly did make moves on me when she got the chance. She wasn’t blatant about it, and she didn’t push me, but I knew if I were to ever try anything with her, she would be more than happy to join in the fun.
It made the situation that much more difficult to be around. I knew I was in control over myself, but there were certainly times when I wasn’t entirely sure if I could trust myself not to give in when I was around her. It was hard – it was really hard for me to tell myself no when I was so used to going out and getting what I wanted.
I would be respectful of Taylor, and more than anything, I would take care of her tonight. I knew this was a tense situation, and I knew things could take a turn at any given time. Hell, I knew I might have to put my life on the line tonight to save these two women from whoever it might be coming after them, but I was willing to do it all in a heartbeat.
I wasn’t afraid of Bud or his MC. I wasn’t afraid of anything.
But, the look of panic etched across her face when I walked into the house was enough to tug at the strings of my heart once more, and I immediately wanted to wrap her up in my arms and comfort her. She had to know by now I was there no matter what, and I wasn’t going to let anyone touch her or her mother, but still, considering the situation, I knew she was scared.
“Let’s go,” I told her.
“Where are we going?”
“I’ve got it taken care of,” I assured her. “Come on.”
“What’s going on?” she asked as we headed outside.
“I can’t tell you right now; but trust me, it’s going to be okay,” I said.
She didn’t look convinced, but I didn’t have time to comfort her. I had to get her and her mother both as far from the house as I could.
Katherine was in the front seat of the car when I reappeared outside with Taylor. She was pale and tight lipped, but there was a look of determination etched into her features. She knew we had to do this, and she was along for the ride no matter how hard things got.