An intensity reverberated from the wall then, a shift within the silence and a change in the very definition of the wall. A door appeared beneath Sera's hand as the man of war lowered his pack from his shoulders and crouched, eyes closed as his hands gripped the blue-steel lance with white-knuckled intensity. Sera thoughtfully considered the door--it stood sturdy, like blackened iron, though a handle encouraged entry.
'Do you not have an answer to this question, vir bellator? Do you require help to find it?' Sera regarded him, but his quiet remained even as he released a deep breath. The door creaked open, its hinges groaning against the effort. A smile caressed her rose lips. 'I am honored at your trust.' She gently pressed the door closed once more. 'You are not yet ready for this complete revelation of self.'
A slight frown creased his brow, only just visible behind the massive helmet of dragon wing and horse hair. The door opened yet again.
'Patience, anima questio. First you must seek the answer to the Truth I asked of you.' Sera again pushed the door firmly shut, the thunk of the latch echoing beyond its sturdy frame. Her touch lingered. 'What is the definition of this silence? Is it for self or for others? This answer is the key to the next. Search it out and remember.' Sera removed her hand and distanced herself from--
"Wait." His voice and a pull called her essence back. "How did you know?"
A smile caressed Sera's delicate features, tempering the appearance of un-natural age and wisdom. 'I know many things, anima questio. Which of these answers do you seek?'
"How did you know . . . if you trespassed beyond the wall, I would have sought to destroy you."
Her countenance softened, and she again rested a hand upon the face of the wall. 'Such utter quiet offers many answers. I have but to listen and search. As you do. As all who come to this mountain.' Thoughtful regard followed her statement. Sera removed her touch and once again turned her spirit from him.
"Please," the voice and pull came again. "What . . . who are you?"
Sera hesitated, intrigued as a caress of wind from her mountain tickled her senses. 'I am the guide to the answers you seek.'
The knight straightened, actions slow as if he held the world's burden upon his shoulders. He then shifted his position to stare directly toward her, though she knew her presence remained concealed within the forest. "I am--"
'You are anima questio, searching soul. Past histories are unseen on this mountain. Only futures are discovered. Only answers to questions which lead there.' Sera extended her sense to envision a gentle touch upon his head. The man's expression warped to restrained agony, the wave of such burning across her senses inviting a hushed prayer for his torment to ease. 'Search the answer for the question given, vir bellator. Search and remember.'
The knight stared into the forest for a long moment. Then he simply gathered his pack and once again made his way toward the summit. Stoic. Deliberate. Almost without hope of an end to his questing.
Sera watched after him, a single eyebrow arched toward her hairline of golden caramel waves. For a distinct moment it appeared he could see her within the lush foliage of her forest retreat. His eyes . . . they had altered in their perception as they met hers. Is he so soon nearing the questions? Only Mount Ordeals could truly know the answer, and the mountain had not yet whispered of his destiny.
There continued only silence.
Her hands enfolded the coolness of her staff as she rested her weight upon it, the jewel glowing as she sought a sweet wind which would soon reveal his path.
~*~*~
Evening came and the knight yet again positioned himself beside the fire. As in nights past, he tended to the upkeep of his lance and the roiling bubble of his game stew. To Sera, his soul and mind stared in on itself, retrospective and listening. Intensely seeking. However, unlike other evenings when she gauged his progress, this night his focus drifted to her location within the forest shadows. She had not yet spoken to his mind nor his soul. Nor had she placed hand upon the wall, or even sought it out. No part of her touched his silence, yet he repeatedly glanced toward her position, an odd rumble resonating within the still air.
The man doffed his helmet, revealing thick locks of medium length the color of a pale winter's sunshine. He set the helmet beside him and began unfastening the clasps of his breastplate, again casting occasional glances toward her. Sera smiled and adjusted her hold upon her oak staff. His readiness neared--perhaps this very night.
"You call me vir bellator. A man of war." He shot her another glance, and his brow furrowed. "I am praesidio viri, a man of protection."
Sera softly laughed. 'Well said, anima questio. I shall no longer call you what you once were. This mountain is for futures.'
The man set aside the breastplate to reveal a tunic of light blue, bearing the crest of Baron's Dragoons. Newly ascended King Cecil was an honorable man, one whom achieved the honor of paladinship after a questing to this very mountain. A man whom surrounded himself with people of equal honor. That this knight bore such a crest spoke well of his character and added a morsel of intrigue. Why would such a man traverse Mount Ordeals seeking a new destiny? Such trials were reserved for those with a more villainous history.
"You are silent tonight." His glance mirrored a rumble within his soul. He busied his hands with the continued removal of his armor. "Did I choose a wrong path?"
'There are no wrong paths, anima questio, only answers awaiting their final question.' The knight offered no reply as he set aside the greaves and gauntlets. 'You also act different this night than others. Have you discovered the first Truth? Does it trouble you?'
He brushed a bit of trail dust from his heavy boots. "Might I ask a question before answering?"
She inclined her head. 'Of course, Lord Dragoon. Ask.'
"How do you speak without voice?" His focus shifted to her location and remained. "You speak directly, I understand, but how? My training here has been to prevent the invasion of my mind."
'So it has, and you have done well in this protection. I have simply continued to prove my trustworthiness to your soul, that I do not--and will not--invade.' Sera's silver-blue eyes held his unseeing gaze. 'You allowed my voice to be heard. You listened for it. You sought it out.' Again, silence was his only response. She smiled. 'Do you have another question?'
The dragoon lowered his head. "No."
Sera adjusted her hold upon her oak staff. The pearl glowed as she once again appeared before the wall. 'What is this silence, praesidio viri?' She balanced her regard to both wall and external self.
"The silence serves two purposes: to protect myself and to protect others."
Sera inclined her head. 'A Truth spoken, yet how does it do this?'
"By protecting them from the evil which resides within, thereby protecting me from the pain of hurting those I care for."
Sadness resonated as a deep shudder beyond the wall, his countenance tainted and twisted by the same. Sera's soul ached with it as she caressed the wall's chilled surface. 'Lord Dragoon, I sense no evil here. There is weakness, yes, but such does not equate the evil you have battled in the valleys beyond this mountain.'
The dragoon's hands fisted. "Weakness gives birth to evil."
'Weaknesses can be shifted to strengths, Lord Dragoon, as you have done. As you continue to do.' Sera offered forward a comforting sense of hand upon shoulder. 'Take heart in this and move forward.'
He took in a deep breath and inclined his head.
'You have done well in the answering of my question, Lord Dragoon. The key is yours, and your quest continues. When you are ready, the next question will be spoken.' Sera withdrew her essence from him. 'Rest well, praesidio viri, and torture not your seeking soul. Pasts do not exist here. Only futures.'
He inclined his head a second time. Sera turned away, her soul hesitating at a strong pull from where he now stood. "Wait."
The pearl upon her staff hummed as she faced him once more. 'Yes, Lord Dragoon?'
"Who are you?"
&nbs
p; Sera's lips curved upward. 'I am she who will help you define the silence. I am she who will guide you to the peace you desire. I am Oracle of Mount Ordeals.'
The dragoon dropped to one knee, head lowered as a fisted hand covered his heart. It was a salute of high honor offered only to the king himself. "My lady Oracle!"
'Rise, Lord Dragoon. Such honor is not sought here.'
The dragoon stood though his eyes did not rise from the pressed earth. "Forgive any impertinence, my lady Oracle."
'There was none, only truth and honesty. Voicing of these will benefit your journey, Lord Dragoon. Now it is time for you to rest.'
The dragoon bowed. "Yes, my lady Oracle. Thank you."
'Your journey toward peace has only just begun.' Sera smoothed a hand along the wall before once more turning into the forest. 'Continue on and you will have your desire.'
THREE
Wall Builders
Kain stared up the path he tread leading to the summit of Mount Ordeals.
'What is this wall? What is this creator of silence?' the feminine voice had asked.
Kain adjusted the pack on his shoulders. A wall. No change had come other than a truer sense of calm. A silence, as it were, from those external voices which so often attempted to direct his attention. The rage brought by the memories of his past treachery had finally drifted to the wayside after the weeks and months of meditating and training his mind.
But a wall?
He expelled a fast breath. I did not know there stood a wall, my lady Oracle. Perhaps this is the next question--? He halted when he felt the sudden warmth of her presence within and without.
'What question would you have me ask, Lord Dragoon, for you have discovered the purpose of the silence the wall causes.'
His gaze wandered to a large willow to his left. The velvet blanket of moss coloring the trunk seemed to shimmer for the merest moment. "I want to understand the purpose for the wall itself."
'Why?'
As before, her questions never struck him as anything more or less than gently probing, urging him to search deeper. To never settle for the easy answer. "Walls are a form of protection, yes, but I begin to see they cause separation. Distance. They are a barrier."
'Well said, Lord Dragoon. My question, then, is this: how do you trespass beyond such a barrier?'
"How indeed. Do you tear it down? Or do you seek out the gate?" He heard a soft laugh, and it rippled against his calm. A smile teased the corners of his mouth.
'You are a philosopher, my lord. You have discovered the next key of your journey.'
Her presence did not dissipate as Kain expected. Another glance toward the willow and then he once again stepped toward the summit. As suspected, she could not be seen. He focused ahead.
'What troubles you? Do you hesitate to search for this answer?'
Kain's blank stare did not waver from the path he tread with dogged intensity. "No. I hesitate to admit the answer I might choose." Again, he felt her gentle grip upon his shoulder. However, when he hazarded a glance, his eyes saw nothing. Expectation continued to build.
'You must not choose the answer. Seek it out, my lord, but allow it to do the choosing.'
Kain nodded, continuing to feel the warmth of her presence though he did not necessarily feel her hand. "This option will be the struggle, my lady Oracle. I am a dragoon of some status. Before that, a soldier." He glanced again. Nothing. He looked away. "Decisions are my life. To not make the choice . . . This is the true test. Will I humble myself and accept the choosing?"
'Have you not humbled yourself to allow my company? Have you not humbled yourself to ask and accept my help?' The warmth on his shoulder moved to a soft stroke of his head. 'This is the next step, my lord, and your soul is ready. If it were not, you would not have voiced your concern.'
The touch moved away, but Kain could still feel the warmth and the presence. It was the longest she had remained by his side. "My lady Oracle?"
'Yes, my lord?'
He glanced to the left--There shimmered a slight vision of white . . . and then it vanished. Kain peered ahead. "Are there dangers which require your assistance? Is that why you have not yet gone?" She remained quiet for a long moment, and the hair of his neck stood on end.
'In life there are always dangers, my lord dragoon. We have but to watch for their coming. But no, such is not the reason I remain. I do so to continue my study of this wall surrounding your weary spirit. If I do not understand its cause, how will I be of help on your journey.'
"You do not often hear silence such as mine," he commented.
'No. I do not. All who journey to this mountain are open souls to me, so that I may encourage the search for their new destiny.'
Kain felt again that slight touch within followed by the heaviness of her sigh.
'This wall has been so long in building, my lord. I fear it shall require great pain to tear it asunder. The thought of bringing such agony grieves me.' The touch slowly vanished. 'But as in all struggles, the completion will welcome great happiness and wholeness for you. This I sense with clarity, my lord dragoon.'
Kain noticed movement to the left of him and glanced--he caught sight of leather sandals and delicate feet beneath a white robe before the vision vanished moments later. "Pain is expected in the life of a soldier, my lady Oracle. It becomes our punishment for those injustices done on behalf of our lord and king. Do not grieve, for we knew well the risks."
'I grieve because the pain is what made the wall necessary. When you first came to this mountain the wall appeared jagged and rough, quickly built. I know that some occurrence in your not-too-distant history caused this construction. It will continue to find its way here, because though histories have no power, yours continues to flourish.'
Another sigh caressed the air and invited another peek. Nothing.
'It is the silence of this wall, my lord, which keeps you distant and creates a diffi--' A gentle press warmed his temple. 'But I say too much when your heart is not ready. Forgive me, Lord Dragoon.'
"There is nothing to forgive, my lady Oracle. Soldiers are accustomed to harshness. Your words have always been truthful and direct while being, at the same time, temperate."
Soft laughter, and Kain heard the hushed whisper of her robe brushing against his armor. When he glanced to his left, her form shimmered longer before vanishing. He focused ahead.
'I am not accustomed to this silence, my lord, therefore I doubt the wisdom of my words and how able and ready you are to hear them. For many years I have been free to gauge the responses and reactions within the souls of those I help. You are the first to not allow such a viewing.'
"I apologize, my lady Oracle." There came another brush of robe against armor, longer this time. "I do not wish to cause you hardship."
'It is no hardship, my lord. The silence is a treasured occurrence. My one regret is I am unable to offer you more help.'
Kain heard the soft crunch of her sandals against the path for several steps before silence returned. "You are Oracle, my lady. The help and wisdom you offer are more than what others give us. That is why we journey here."
'Thank you, my lord, for such kind words.' She laughed, the dulcet tones dancing on the caress of a breeze. 'It has been many years since this Oracle has needed words of encouragement. Perhaps this journey will be of great benefit to us both?'
Kain glanced to his left. The white-robed form did not shimmer nor fade. Her hood continued to hide her profile from view, allowing only the sight of a thick plait of golden hair hanging well past her belt of gold braid. Delicate, long-fingered hands clasped this braid in one hand and a smooth white-wood staff in the other. A lump formed in his throat as he focused ahead yet again. He swallowed it down. "I will offer what help I can, my lady Oracle."
The ensuing touch upon his arm pressed as flesh against armor. 'Yes, I know of your deep desire to protect, my lord dragoon. But here, on this mountain, you must try to allow the protection of your person. For such is my duty whi
le you journey toward your future.'
"Of course, my lady Oracle."
Her touch lowered from his arm, and Kain watched as her white-oak staff indicated forward. A pearl orb glowed at the apex. 'The summit. You must go on from here alone.'
Kain halted, only just preventing himself from facing her. She was Oracle. He was only a dragoon.
'Remember,' she said as her touch warmed his temple, 'seek not the answer. Listen and hear.'
"I will stay until the answer has chosen me," he told her.
'I will watch over you, anima questio.'
How long had she defended the poor souls who navigated this path of agony? Kain stepped forward to the summit, feeling her presence and taking comfort.
~*~*~
Night descended and still Kain searched for the answer. Silent. Waiting. Listening to the wind and the trees and the creatures who tried to reason why he remained on their mountain.
There is a barrier. Why have I designed this wall? How do I crumble this separation? Does it prevent me from a discovery of my destiny?
The barrier spawned calm, control, and protected him and his friends. But what if this same wall distanced him from those people who held a role of importance in his life? Was the silence worth the presence of the wall? If the wall were removed, would control remain? Or would he again become a danger to his friends?
Kain stared down at his hands where they rested upon his knees. He shifted, bringing the broad, gloved hands to a more in-depth scrutiny. He had battled his best friend with these same hands. He had acted as a villain to the very woman he once loved. He balled his hands into fists and forced a slow retreat of them to his knees. Would these hands return to such acts if he tore down the barrier? Or would his control be victorious and result only in protection?
Kain clenched his jaw and stood, turning for the path leading from the mountain.
~*~*~
Sera watched the dragoon stand. Agony marred his features, his hands balled in white-knuckled rage. The answer eluded him with stealth and determination. Whatever his past, it continued to haunt his waking moment. Sera felt certain it was this history he kept so enclosed behind the wall. For some reason, he believed it continued to hold sway over those he vowed to protect--perhaps over his very identity.
Mists of Destiny (A Collection) Page 5