“Not demands,” Alex chided. “Requests I’d like you to consider. Firstly, we will leave London and spend at least a fortnight in Kent.”
Ben nodded. “I need a reprieve from London anyway. What else?”
“You must accompany me on one outing before we leave, to the establishment of my choosing.”
“Fine. Anything else?”
“No.”
“Good. Hands behind your back. Let’s see how well you obey.”
Alex almost protested, wanting his hands on Ben so badly it hurt. But, he had already pushed their negotiations far enough. Now he needed to play Ben’s game.
Clasping his hands behind his back, Alex stared expectantly at Ben, who was still lazily stroking himself. He seemed relaxed now, his position of control proving to be comfortable territory.
“Open your mouth,” he said, his voice heavy with command.
Alex couldn’t obey fast enough, eagerly leaning in to accept the offering of Ben’s cock. The tumescent head nudged against his lower lip, the salty taste of skin and semen teasing his palate. Alex flicked his tongue against it, noting how the muscles in Ben’s lower belly hardened and contracted in reaction. With a slow, controlled exhalation, Ben thrust his hips, slowly easing his way into Alex’s mouth. Alex closed his lips around Ben, his mouth stretched and filled. With his tongue, he caressed a bulging vein along the underside, detecting Ben’s throbbing pulse.
Ben’s fingers tangled in the hairs at the nape of his neck, pulling him closer and pushing his way deeper. A rough groan fell from his lips when his cock found the back of Alex’s throat. He withdrew, and Alex sucked, absorbing the taste of Ben and the scent of his musk. He clenched his hands together so hard his fingers ached, but couldn’t let go for fear he’d give in to the need to explore with his fingers. Alex wanted to wrap his hand around Ben’s cock and stroke, fondle his bollocks, ease a finger past them and toward the hidden pucker of his arse. Ben knew him too well not to know what he desired, and would surely enjoy denying him that.
Alex kept his eyes open and fixed on Ben, taking in every nuanced expression as the hardened veneer of indifference melted away. His lips softened and parted, his eyes hooded by the pale fringe of his lashes as he eased his cock in and out of Alex’s mouth. The room seemed charged with tangible energy, tension coiling between them like a spring. It increased as Ben tightened his grip on Alex’s hair, guiding his head downward with each surge of his hips, his strokes coming harder and faster. Alex gasped around Ben’s cock, accepting the deep invasion rather than fighting it, wanting to take as much of Ben as could fit. It seemed a near impossible feat, but that didn’t stop him from sucking and bobbing his head, opening himself to everything Ben had to give.
The telltale taste of Ben’s impending climax coated his tongue, and Alex intensified his efforts, sucking harder and faster, his face and neck flushing from the effort, his own cock pushing against his fall and begging for reciprocal stimulation. Even his own hand would do, bringing him off within seconds, but he kept both firmly behind his back. He would do nothing to prematurely end what surely must be the most transcendent moment of the past few years of his life. Nothing was certain, and the future could be affected by any number of variables, but none of that mattered right now. Being connected to Ben again, even amid so much turmoil, was the manifestation of countless sleepless nights and waking daydreams. It felt right and real and true.
Ben’s head fell against the back of his chair, hissing moans trapped behind clenched teeth as he gripped Alex’s head in both hands and thrust like a madman, chasing his finish. A string of profanities was the only warning Alex had before Ben’s cock shot streams of hot, salty seed into his mouth. Alex closed his eyes and took every drop, his scalp stinging from the tightness of Ben’s hold. Ben jerked and convulsed in the chair, thrusting through every second of his climax. Once fully spent, he released Alex and slumped, legs spread and shoulders relaxed.
Alex went back on his haunches, drinking in deep breaths and trying to will his stubborn erection away. The vindictive gleam in Ben’s eyes just before he had commanded Alex to his knees meant he wouldn’t be allowed his own pleasure just yet. That was fine by him for now; his mission had been accomplished. Ben would be solely his, and in the privacy of his estate, they could begin to mend what had been broken.
“I’d forgotten how good you are at that,” Ben said while putting his clothes to rights and then coming to his feet. “Twenty-five thousand pounds and the efforts of your skilled mouth … I do think I am receiving the better end of this bargain, Alex.”
Alex stood, wincing at the ache in his knees. “That’s the idea.”
Ben readjusted his chair, gripping its back as he observed Alex from the corner of his eye. “At least until you grow bored of the novelty of having me as your courtesan.”
I could never grow bored of you, Alex thought, still able to taste the remnants of Ben’s spend on his tongue.
“You mentioned something about a contract?” he asked aloud, keeping the thought to himself.
Ben lifted a decanter from one corner of his desk and poured himself a measure of brandy. “We usually have our clients agree to the terms on paper, but considering the danger of being caught, we will simply have to shake on it.”
Alex promptly extended his hand. “Very well. You can trust me to adhere to your terms.”
As he accepted the extended hand, Ben’s expression clearly said he didn’t trust Alex farther than he could throw him. However, they shook with a firm, decisive grasp—as if Alex hadn’t just swallowed the length of Ben’s cock.
Ben turned away and stalked to a nearby window, gazing out over the back courtyard as he sipped his brandy. Just to the right of the window, an aberration made itself apparent in the mahogany paneling of the wall. Alex frowned, drawing closer to study what turned out to be a circular hole. A smooth, shiny object appeared just beyond the scar ruining the precious wood, though for the life of him he couldn’t determine what it was.
“What happened here?” he asked.
Ben turned just as Alex pointed at the spot, his expression darkening like a thundercloud had passed over him. Turning back to the window, he tightened his jaw. “Nothing that need concern you. When do we leave for Kent?”
Alex blinked, stunned by what he had just witnessed. It was an odd reaction for a man to have concerning a hole in his wall, but he dared not press further. There were so many mysteries of Ben’s changed personality to untangle and absorb, and now Alex had plenty of time to do just that.
“Three days, if it suits you.”
“It does. Our outing?”
“Tomorrow night.”
“Very well. Until then.”
He didn’t even gaze away from the window, making it clear that Alex had just been summarily dismissed. It took a great deal of his will to turn and walk away, reminding himself that this was only the beginning. If he had his way, what he and Ben shared would never end.
Alex stared at Ben’s shadowed silhouette, anticipation making him restless. The sway of his carriage intensified his anxiety, and his left leg bounced in a manifestation of it. He had arrived at Ben’s residence to collect him half an hour ago, and they’d nearly reached their destination. Alex could feel Ben’s annoyance from across the carriage but brushed it off without a second thought. Alex would have to deal with his companion's surliness through the first days of their arrangement. It wasn’t enough to deter him. Besides, his hope was that this outing would help ease some of the friction between them, reminding Ben of times long past but hopefully not forgotten.
“Where are you taking me?” Ben asked.
It was the first time either of them had spoken during the ride, and Alex was grateful he hadn’t been forced to break the silence.
“It’s a surprise,” he teased.
“I hate surprises,” Ben grunted.
“I think you will like this one. Besides, when was the last time you did something fun? I imagine you spend quite a
bit of time training for your boxing matches and … and tending to your … business.”
Ben’s teeth flashed in the dark in a mocking grin. “Fucking. My business is fucking.”
A shiver raced through Alex as the crude words fell from Ben’s lips. His pleasure-starved body had been vexing him since yesterday; fevered dreams of kneeling before Ben and swallowing his cock having tormented his sleep. Knowing Ben as well as he did, Alex had a feeling he’d be made to wait until they reached Kent for their business to truly begin. He felt as if he might die between now and then.
He groped about for something to say lest his wandering thoughts cause him to do something stupid. “Doesn’t it concern you? The potential for being caught, I mean. There is greater risk for you than the other men involved.”
Ben shrugged. “No more risk than sneaking around in parks with renters or meeting lovers in public house rooms. At least, by attaching a price to my services, the risk is outweighed by the potential for wealth.”
“You make an interesting point. I hadn’t thought of it that way.”
“I daresay you never thought of men as courtesans at all before now, let alone male courtesans who service other men.”
“No,” Alex agreed. “Though I have to admit the idea is ingenious. It certainly seems to have improved your fortunes, as well as Aubrey’s.” He had a certain thought and sat up straighter, eyes widening. “Dear God … Nick was involved, too, wasn’t he? You’re thick as thieves, and I cannot believe you’d start such a venture without him.”
Ben didn’t even bother to deny it. “Nick was one of the best before he met Calliope and settled down. Earned himself a king’s ransom and gambled most of it away within a few years. His inheritance has set things right again, and he’s become better at managing his funds.”
Alex wasn’t surprised to hear that their old school friend had allowed his vice to lead him to destitution. Dominick Burke had joined their small circle of friends once they’d reached university. Benedict resumed his secret bare-knuckle brawls in this new setting—though he took greater care to avoid being caught. Alex had been curious enough to sneak away to watch the spectacle, both horrified and entranced by the beauty and brutality of Ben—bare-chested and sweating, pummeling this man or that one with his hammer-like fists.
It was at one of these matches that they’d met Dominick, who approached them while counting his winnings and praising Ben for his skills. His obsession with gambling led him to wager on just about everything—from footraces and fights, to the changing of the weather and the probabilities of certain boys being sent home in disgrace after some lark or another. That he was now reformed came as a greater surprise than the realization that his gambling had continued to plague him up until recently.
“Good for him,” Alex murmured. “Where is he living these days? Now that he’s no longer at Albany, I don’t know where to find him.”
“He hasn’t been to London in months, but I cannot say where he might be at present. There’s an estate in Cornwall and another in Leicester. His father-in-law also owns property in Surrey, and he and his wife visit regularly.”
That was disappointing, only because Alex hadn’t laid eyes on Nick in years … since his wedding day, in fact. Their close friendship wasn’t enough to let Dominick in on Alex’s secret, and he wondered if Ben had ever come clean. As far as Alex knew, Aubrey and Lady Dane were the only mutual friends who knew about their history and preferences.
What would Nick think if he knew? He would likely discover the truth eventually. Once Alex had achieved the desired outcome, he didn’t intend to be without Ben ever again. From the outside looking in, others would see a close and enduring friendship between two men. Being as close as he was to both of them, Nick was sure to notice that something deeper was at play. It was one of many challenges they would have to navigate together—presenting themselves to society as bachelors who had been the best of friends since university, and hiding the true nature of what they shared. For many, it might seem like a bleak future, but Alex saw the silver lining of it. When they were alone, they would be free to carry on as they pleased—free from prying eyes and scrutiny. Free to love one another and be loved.
He wanted to express such thoughts to Ben, but now was not the time. As the carriage slowed to a stop, Alex reminded himself that he was playing the long game. He would have to earn Ben’s heart back piece by piece, and thus far he didn’t even have the barest sliver.
Patience, he reminded himself. It will take time.
The door swung open, and the footman laid the steps. Alex emerged first, turning to watch Ben peer cautiously at the building illuminated by gas lamps. The light showed the scowl that marred his face as he looked at Alex.
“No,” he snapped. “Absolutely not.”
Alex pursed his lips. “You promised. We shook on it. One outing to the place of my choosing.”
“I wouldn’t have agreed had I known this was where you intended to take me … which, I suppose, is why you decided not to divulge our actual destination.”
“Indeed. But we are here now, and a bargain is a bargain.”
Here turned out to be Mother Morton’s Coffee-House and Tavern in Soho Square. From the outside, it appeared like any other respectable tavern. However, one must procure membership and pay a yearly fee to be allowed entrance to the evening suppers. Despite having been away from London for years, Alex had kept up his membership, looking forward to the day he might be able to return. Katherine had been well aware of his nature, and was both understanding and accommodating. They had never returned to London after their marriage, but if they had, she wouldn’t have begrudged him a trip to Mother Morton’s. It wouldn’t have been his aim to find another man for an assignation, as the hurt over being forced to let go of Ben was still too fresh. But there was something to be said for having a place to go where a man could simply be himself without fear—especially when who he was could earn him time in the pillory, the loss of his title and lands, or a dance on the end of a noose
Now that he could experience it again, Alex very much wanted Ben to share it with him.
“Fine,” Ben huffed, hauling himself out of the carriage.
He blew past Alex toward the entrance while avoiding his gaze. They paused for Alex to present the card he carried as proof of his membership, vouching for his companion before being allowed entrance. His shoulders slumped in dizzying relief as the door swung shut behind them. They were ushered past a velvet curtain into the wide, open room of the tavern, which was filled with the haze of cigar and cheroot smoke, as well as a clamor of voices and laughter. Atmospheric lighting from the chandelier and candelabras revealed a long bar along one side of the room, around which were crowded a colorful array of patrons. The middle of the room had been cleared of all furniture for dancing, and upon a stage draped in green and gold curtains, a group of musicians filled the air with lively music.
The right side of the room was reserved for those who wished to dine—the tables ranging in size from intimate settings for two, and sprawling accommodations for larger groups.
“Shall we have dinner first?” Alex suggested, his stomach rumbling. He hadn’t eaten since this morning, too nervous to think of taking a single bite.
“Whatever you want,” Ben grumbled, allowing Alex to take his arm and guide him toward an empty table.
Alex leaned in to whisper in his ear. “I will hold you to that.”
Ben glared at him but didn’t bother to put any distance between them. Here, two men leaning into each other and linking arms was the mildest of affections on display. All around them, men clasped hands, embraced, and traded kisses without second thought, safe in the knowledge that it was safe to do so.
Mother Morton’s hadn’t changed much during Alex’s absence. As he and Ben settled into a small table for two in a shadowy corner, he felt a warming sensation like coming home after a long time away.
He and Ben had frequented this tavern many a night, and everywhere Alex
looked, he saw something that reminded him of those days. Phantom memories materialized before him like wisps of smoke.
Feeling Ben’s eyes on him, Alex glanced up and offered a shy smile.
“Why here?” Ben demanded. The sparse words were strained and heavy with the weight of the past.
“You know why,” Alex countered.
Ben neglected to respond as a flamboyantly dressed waiter approached them. He wore the signature scarlet and gold colors of all the staff at Mother Morton’s, though his attire was anything but conventional. From neck to waist, he was respectable in white shirtsleeves and a bright red waistcoat with gleaming gold buttons. It was the billowing tufts of a matching skirt that drew the eye, the darts and gatherings reminiscent of an older style in women’s fashion. A pair of heeled shoes with gleaming silver buckles peeked out from beneath his hem. His head was covered by a red and gold turban adorned with a brooch made of paste jewels, a jaunty red feather arching along his jaw. His face was painted with rouge and kohl, a few hours’ worth of stubble showing through white face powder. A heart-shaped beauty patch stood out beneath one eye.
“Good evening, gentlemen,” he said in a deep voice belying his feminine attire. “Can I interest you in a late supper? The mutton is exceptionally good tonight, and there are a scrumptious array of selections for dessert.”
Ben barely spared the waiter a glance as he ordered beefsteak and ale, while Alex requested the mutton, a bottle of Burgundy, and a selection of every available dessert.
Their waiter was off with a swish of his skirts, disappearing through a crowd of other men dressed in sedate evening attire mingling with those whose cuffs and collars dripped with lace, their faces painted, their heads adorned with towering, powdered wigs. Here and there, Alex spotted men in corsets and skirts and gowns ranging from homely to decadent. Painted fans fluttered, and jeweled hands waved through the air amid animated conversation.
Ben took in the scene with a clenched jaw, his entire body radiating tension. Alex knew this reaction to be his fault, not the fault of those congregating around them. Being reminded of a place they’d once gone together to be alone and free made Alex happy, as it clearly had the opposite effect on Ben. It was Alex’s hope that by the end of the night, that would change.
Chasing Benedict (The Gentleman Courtesans Book 5) Page 11