by C. A. Rene
“Thank you,” Ember whispers, “I just wanted to make sure.”
I open my eyes and look up at Vin holding my sister in his arms and the both of them staring down at me. I feel someone stir behind me and turn my head slowly to see Adri pressed up to my back and Travis pressed up to hers. I guess we do look real cozy. I slowly sit up and yawn.
“How are you feeling?” I ask her as I scrub my hand over my face.
“A little sore and groggy.” She says with a smile, “I’m okay.”
“Are you able to leave?” I ask, “did you want to get home?”
“I should be fine, I’ll just lay across the backseat of Hummy.”
“Ugh.” Vin rolls his eyes in exasperation.
“Okay, let’s get out of here. I want to go home.” I stretch and reach over to hit Travis on the shoulder, “wake up.”
I watch as his green eyes open and focus on my face, the smile that ghosts his lips is meant for just me and he has yet to realize we have an audience.
I angle my head in their direction, “Ember wants to head home.”
When he finally looks up and sees them, the small smile leaves and his eyes widen. “E!” He jumps up out of bed, waking up Adri in the process. “Is it okay for you to leave? Are you okay?” He asks quickly.
“Are you okay?” She asks him, worry lining her face.
“Me?”
“Yeah, I never wanted you to see that. It was supposed to be an easy in and out fight.” She says with sadness.
“I’m just glad your mostly okay.” He grimaces as he looks towards her stomach.
“I’ve had worse, it’ll be good in a few weeks.”
“Okay,” he nods. “Let’s go home.”
After the long ass drive, this time Travis comes with us, we finally get home and I exhale a sigh of relief as the gates open. We dropped Adri off first and just like always, her parents weren’t there but the cook and groundskeeper greeted her like family.
“What’s up with Adri’s parents?” I ask Travis.
“They are nice enough but I don’t think they ever wanted children. They are kind of like hippies. They just travel around the world and live off the back account Georgina’s parents made fat.”
“Georgina?”
“Adri’s mother.” Travis’ face screws up in disgust. “She oozes arrogance because her mother and father were the richest founders here. They practically built this town and funded the school as well.”
“Wow, so a snobby cunt.” I nod.
Travis chuckles as I park the car and we both get out to head inside. The house is empty because Vin and Ember are about a half hour behind us.
“Want to make some food before they get back? I know I’m hungry and Vin can always eat.” Travis grins.
“Yeah.”
We are deep in the middle of stirring a pot of spaghetti and meatballs when Ember and Vin come home. Ember is walking on her own, which I expected because that girl just can’t relax and Vin is carrying in the bags.
“You guys hungry?” I ask as I get to my sister and pick her up into my arms.
“Emmett,” she sighs in exasperation. “I can walk!”
“I can piss sitting down too, but I’d rather stand.” I shrug.
“That makes zero sense, you idiot.” She grins up at me.
“I can always eat.” Vin states and it pulls a chuckle from me.
“That’s what Travis said.”
“Looks domesticated in here, Bro.” Vin hollers at Travis as he enters the kitchen.
“Word.” Travis nods and comes over to kiss Ember’s cheek. “How are you feeling?”
“Hungry.” She smiles sheepishly.
We’re all sitting at the table quietly eating when I broach the subject of the knife, “how are we finding out about what happened during that fight?”
“Carm says he’s on it.” Ember states around a mouthful of pasta, “he’s questioning Wade.”
“Good for him. What are we doing though?”
“You want to go against your brother?” Vin asks me with his brow raised.
“Not against, but I think we should do something too.” I shrug.
“He’s right.” Travis says while he puts his fork down, “Carm seems nice but maybe his workload is a bit high.”
There’s something he’s not saying and I can tell by the way he avoids my eyes. What exactly did he talk to my brother about? Maybe what I thought was flirting was something else entirely.
“Okay, we would have to look into Wade and Trent since those were the two that walked him out.” Ember says. “Trent is adamant that the guy was held in a room for three hours before the fight. The only people in there were Wade, himself and a guard.”
“I can never see Trent doing that.” I shake my head, “he’s been loyal to our family from birth.”
“Not to me,” Ember states. “He just met me.”
“But he knew you worked for us before. You were always one of us in some form.” I argue. I can never see Trent doing that.
“Regardless,” Vin interjects. “We need to look into all three. But if I were to wage a bet, my money is on Wade.”
“Let’s think about the motives.” Travis says. “Wade is a fellow Head member, which means he worked in some capacity with my father. Does he know you killed him?”
“Yeah.” Ember nods.
“Maybe they were close?” Travis suggests, “this was his revenge?”
“That’s a good theory.” Ember agrees.
“Carm,” Travis quickly looks at me in apology. “You messed up his flow by sneaking in as a Head. You interrupted his life and stole his younger brother away. He’s now solely responsible for a large… organization.”
“Whoa.” I drop my fork. “You’ve been thinking about this.”
“Not really,” he shakes his head. “I’m just being objective.”
“Carm loves Ember.”
“He’s barely known her a year,” he stresses, “in that span, he kidnapped her, killed her best friend and hasn’t really provided much in the way of help with Talia.”
“Hold on,” I stand. “I've barely known her a year, too. I love her. Are we really thinking it’s Carm?”
“No, fool.” Ember tosses her napkin at me, “but we are considering all angles.”
“Carm wasn’t even near the room,” I protest. “He was training with you and then we stayed with you until the fight.”
“But Carm could get Trent…”
“Stop!” I cut off Travis. “It’s not Carm!”
“I agree.” Ember nods. “Carm wouldn’t do that, nor do I think Trent would. I always figured it was Wade, I just didn’t see his motive. We should look into his background.”
“I’m not hungry anymore.” I bring my plate to the sink and make my way out of the kitchen. “Goodnight.” I call over my shoulder.
Yeah, I know I’m being childish but I can’t believe Travis would actually imply that my brother, the man that took care of me would ever do something like that to my twin sister. It’s better if I just keep to myself tonight and cool the fuck down. I don’t want to start shit over people’s theories.
My room is a bit messy and my school shit is tossed all over the fucking place. I need to study for a chem test this Monday and I have a paper due for English. So, pretty much the rest of my weekend will be trying to teach myself shit. When I was being homeschooled, I got these packages each month. As long as they were completed and sent back on time, you pretty much passed. So, being in actual school and learning a lot more than I’m used to is stressing me the fuck out.
A few hours later I hear bedroom doors open and shut and I realize I can barely keep my own eyes open. After everything that happened with Ember and the long ass drive, I need to get some sleep. I try to listen and see if I can hear anything from Travis’ room, but it sounds completely still. Is he in there thinking about me? I Wonder if he's trying to figure out how to talk
to me or maybe apologize for pissing me off.
He better be.
24
This whole week has been a nightmare. Adrianna is completely ignoring me, acting like I don’t exist. She’s the only one for so long that has actually given a damn about me. So having her cut me out like this is killing me. On top of that, my father is acting so fucking strange. He’s been giving me weird looks and grins like an evil mastermind whenever I come into his office. He has something planned and after the last ‘meeting’, I am scared.
It’s Saturday and that means baseball practice. I run into the kitchen and find my mother sitting at the table. Her bottle of vodka already opened in front of her. She turns at my running footsteps and a sneer comes over her face.
“The only time you look happy is when you get to play with balls with a bunch of boys.” Her laugh is downright evil, “you a faggot?”
“No!” I yell at her and grab an apple. Maybe I should tell her how her husband and I just shared a prostitute. Ew, that sounds nasty… nevermind.
Usually before practice I eat oatmeal or cereal, but I don’t see Sonja anywhere and I don’t want to be in this kitchen any longer than I have to with this woman. I run out of the kitchen and hear her nasty cackle behind me. I don’t know why I was cursed to be in this screwed up family.
I head towards Precious Blood Academy. We’ve always had our practices here, even before we actually went here. It has the best and biggest baseball field. Adrianna’s grandfather made sure of it when he had it commissioned, he was a huge baseball fan. The thought of Adri makes my stomach twist. I don’t know what I did to piss her off. Was it because we made out? Did she feel like I ruined our friendship? I don’t want to lose her completely but I don’t know if I can ever just be her friend.
“Travis!” I hear Kevin call out, “hurry, we have to do burpees!”
“Kay!”
I rush into the locker room and quickly change into my uniform. Thankfully, Sonja washed it for me. She even placed my favourite protein bar and a milkshake inside my bag. Sometimes, I wished she were my mother and not the evil hag.
I run back out to the diamond and see Kevin talking to the others. He hates warmups and burpees even more. It’s probably because he’s scrawny.
“Hey Travis,” Kevin whispers, “Jeremy isn’t here today.”
“Why not?” I ask.
“Coach says he’s sick.”
That’s weird. This past summer, Jeremy came down with Mono and he still forced himself to come and watch, even if he couldn’t participate.
After practice, I helped Coach put all the equipment away and watched as everyone left until it was just me and him. I slowly walk back to the locker room and find Coach standing near my locker. After what Stacey told me, I am having a hard time looking him in the eye.
“What’s going on, Sport?” He asks me.
“I can’t stay late anymore.” I tell him, “you should find someone else to help you put stuff away.”
“That’s too bad.” He scrubs his hand against his double chin, “I liked having you as my favourite boy.”
“Not anymore, Coach.” I give him what I think is my sternest look and head to the showers.
The warm water hits the top of my head and I let it slide down over my face. Sometimes, I can just stand under the stream without doing anything. It’s so relaxing and it feels like it just washes away all my sad thoughts.
Suddenly, I am pushed against the tiled wall, my head hitting it with a thud. I feel Coach behind me, holding me there with strength I didn’t know he had.
“Thing is, Travis.” His breath fans my ear, “I’ve been plenty patient with you, but that ends here, today.”
He kicks my legs apart and steps between them. He’s naked as well and I suddenly feel as sick as I did with that woman in my father’s office.
“Don’t, Coach.” I try to reason with him, “please. I will stay. I will help you.”
“Too late.” He growls into my ear.
I try to fight him off but he just presses my head into the tile harder and I whimper as the pain radiates down to the base of my neck.
“Stop fighting and I will ease up.” He says a little breathlessly. Coach is not in good shape but he is a lot bigger than me.
I nod slightly and let the fight leave my body. What’s the point anyways? The more I fight the bad things in my life, the more it screws me over.
He spreads me and I let my mind carry me to another place. Away from the piercing pain and the pink water swirling down into the drain.
25
I fucking hate Monday mornings. I hate having to drag myself out of bed and get to a place that I can’t fucking stand. It’s not so bad now that Adri is back in my life, but that building holds a lot of bad memories.
I have steered clear of Emmett because I want him to calm down and see that I wasn’t attacking his brother, I was just throwing out options. Do I think Carm would do that to Ember? I’m not sure, to be honest, I don’t know him. Is it probable? Yeah, it is. But Wade has a higher probability. He’s also steered clear from me, going as far as to take his bike to school this morning.
Adri texted me this morning asking to pick her up since Emmett wanted to take his bike. He must be super pissed if he couldn’t even come tell me that himself. It just means I need to talk to him and make him see my side.
After picking up Adri and just barely getting us to school on time, I run into homeroom and nearly crash into Vin’s chest. He raises a single brow over his green eyes and takes a step back.
“What’s up, Bro?” He questions.
“Sorry, just running late.” I walk around him and set my bag down on my desk.
“Mr. Gamry is late anyways.” He nods at the clock. “Trouble in paradise?”
“No,” I shake my head. “Everything with Adri is good.”
“I meant with Emmett.”
My head snaps around so fast, I fear I’ve just given myself whiplash. “Uh… what?”
“You think I don’t see shit?” He grins. “You two are always giving each other eyes.”
“We do not give eyes.” I roll my eyes.
“Yeah, you do.” He points into my face, “is that why you’re sharing Adri?”
“Shh!!!” I smack his shoulder, “what’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing. Who cares what anyone thinks?”
“I do.” I mutter, “besides it’s not like that.”
“I know you and Adri love each other and I also know Adri is dating Emmett. Is that not strange?”
“Dude, stop.” I moan, dropping my head to the desk. “Don’t tell E about your wild ideas.”
“Oh!” He snaps and then laughs, “you’re scared about what Ember will do.”
The teacher thankfully comes at that moment and forces my big mouthed brother to shut up. I can’t believe he figured that out and it makes me nervous when I try to think about who else has figured it out. If Ember knew, she would’ve told Vin, right?
The bell rings, ending homeroom and I breathe out with relief.
“We’ll talk at lunch.” He looks over with a smirk.
Yeah, I’m not avoiding him today.
Thankfully, the day does go by quickly and I made it out of lunch without falling prey to Vin’s incessant questioning. It’s unnerving how much the fucker actually picked up on. I need to learn to never judge how much someone is paying attention by how quiet they are.
I grabbed all E’s work from trig and noticed how Emmett barely looked at me all period-just like during chemistry. I’ll just stick to the plan and talk to him when we’re at home. No need making a scene here at school where more people can deduce our relationship.
I see Jeremy is back at school once I hit the locker room for last period. Kevin sees me and gives me a brief nod before nodding his head in Jeremy’s direction. I nod back and continue changing for practice. When most have cleared out, it leaves me, Jeremy, Kevin, and a few
stragglers.
“Hey Jer.” I call out to him.
“Sup?” He asks.
“Can I have a word with you after practice?”
His eyes widen and flick quickly between Kevin and I. Yeah, he already has an idea of what’s going to be said.
“Sure.” He nods.
Coach Wheeler sticks his head in the locker room and yells at us to move it. Practice is pretty much the same as it always is and I find myself becoming more and more bored with this sport. I’m a good baseball player but it’s not something I want to continue with beyond high school. I would like to maybe become an author or write screenplays. That shit is interesting. The thought of taking over a business that belonged to the man I hated, makes me feel so fucking worthless.
After baseball, we all take our showers and Jer, Kev, and I slowly get ready, waiting for everyone else to clear out. This conversation absolutely cannot be overheard. As soon as the place clears out, both Kevin and I look to Jeremy.
“What’s up?” He asks as I detect a slight waver in his voice.
“Last night I was thinking about the time you missed baseball practice for two weeks. Remember grade nine?” I say to him.
Kevin’s brows come together as he thinks about what I just said.
“Yeah, I remember.” Jeremy says as his shoulders slightly fall.
“What happened?” I ask him.
“Yeah,” Kevin’s head pops up, “you were there even when you fucking had Mono.”
Jeremy runs his hand down his face and shakes it out, “I could barely walk, let alone sit on a fucking bench.” He answers quietly.
Yeah, I know that feeling all too well. I also had a week off after what Coach did to me that first time.
“The first time?” I ask.
“Yeah.” He whispers.
“That first Saturday you missed practice, was my first time too.” I tell him.
Kevin slumps down to sit on the bench and exhales loudly, “mine was the summer before.”
We’re all quiet as we think over the actions one man did to us all. The silence is like a heavy blanket, wrapping us closer together.