Studying the pale cream-colored layers, I recognized part of it.
Meeting my mother’s elated eyes, I stared in disbelief. “Part of this was yours, from your full moon celebration.”
“And the lace was from your grandmother’s.”
The lace peeked from between the other layers of soft fabric, adding a hint of femininity I didn’t expect to like so much. I’d never been the type of female to like such pretty things, but this was a special night, and I couldn’t wait to put the dress on.
Without warning, tears filled my vision. Again.
“Oh, now. No need for all that.”
The small crack in my mother’s voice didn’t escape my attention. It certainly didn’t help dry my eyes.
“Come on. Let’s see how it fits.”
Pulling the ridiculously soft fabric down over my head, she tugged it into place and drew the wide bands over my shoulders. She crossed them in the back, circled my torso just beneath my breasts and tucked in the ends for a seamless look.
I never paid much attention to my figure. Hell, I didn’t realize I even had one until I stepped in front of the mirror and saw how perfectly the dress fit me.
I stared at my reflection, barely recognizing the young woman before me. Decker would surely think they’d switched me out for someone else.
A knock on the door drew my gaze. My father slipped into the room, his steps faltering when he spotted me in front of the mirror.
Nervous, I asked, “How do I look?”
A wide smile brightened his handsome face as he came to stand behind me. Giving my shoulders a light squeeze, he whispered hoarsely, “Beautiful.”
I blushed, brushing at the asymmetrical skirting. “You think so?”
My father nodded. “Absolutely. Decker will be speechless.”
I laughed to myself. Decker wasn’t exactly a man of many words anyway. Other than his confession…and his vow to me, he’d only spoken a handful of words in the last three days.
“Come out when you’re ready. I will be waiting on the dais.”
I nodded, drawing a deep breath. “I need a few minutes.”
“Don’t keep your male waiting too long. He looks anxious enough without you torturing him.”
My brows shot up, and I turned to my father. “Decker is nervous?”
With an amused grin, he grasped my shoulders and kissed my cheek. He then turned to my mother and Nailana. “Ladies.”
Both women gave me a gentle hug, kissed my forehead and whispered, “May the goddess be with you.”
I thanked each of them and watched as they followed my father outside. The second the door closed behind them I realized I didn’t want to be alone. No point in working myself up by letting my thoughts run away with me. The sooner I walked out that door, the sooner the ceremony would be over. Then I could sit with my new companion and enjoy the festivities.
With my mouth dry and heart pounding, I drew a deep breath and shoved open the door.
Decker stood on the porch, his back to the crowd. He looked completely different without his weapons and his usual leather pants. Instead, he wore a cream-colored button-down that played up his dark skin, and a pair of low-slung pants that hugged him in all the right places.
Decker lifted his gaze when I stepped onto the porch, and his hard features softened the moment he saw me. His awed expression—and the way his eyes instantly took on that now-familiar golden glow—made me glad all over again that he’d been the one to win the trials.
Without a word, Decker took a step in my direction and offered his hand. I gladly accepted. An unexpected calm settled over me the second his big, warm palm engulfed mine. All my nervousness about the ceremony and being in front of everyone just melted away.
Decker gently tugged me to his side, and as we faced the massive gathering together, I felt like my life was finally on the right path.
Ignoring everyone else, I kept my eyes on Decker’s. “Are you ready for this?”
“More than you know,” he admitted, his voice barely a whisper. “You?”
I smiled up at him and nodded.
Decker led me down the steps and to the raised platform at the yard’s center. My father waited for us there, a twinkle of pride in his eyes as he watched us approach. I was the first of his children to take a companion, and I knew he was happy for me. Not only as my father, but also as my alpha.
Excitement rolled off the packs in waves, only amplifying my anticipation. I loved full moon ceremonies, and knowing what followed this one only thrilled me more.
As we stopped before the dais, my father poured us each a glass of wine. The deep red liquid resembled blood, in both color and consistency, but the pungent aroma I expected wasn’t there. Instead, a rich plummy scent rose from the cups, and I couldn’t wait to taste it.
Lifting his gaze, my father addressed the packs. “Every full moon, when our connection to the goddess is strongest, wolfkind comes together. We come to give thanks to the goddess for all she has done for our people. Now, raise a glass with me.”
Everyone—both young and old—held their drinks high, and my father continued.
“First, we must thank the wolf mother. Without her sacrifice we would not be who we are today.”
“To the mother!” everyone shouted.
“Second, we thank the goddess for blessing the mother with a dual spirit.”
Another collective shout went up. “To the goddess!”
“May we always walk honorably along the path our ancestors laid before us, and never take for granted the gifts the goddess bestowed upon us. May we carry the spirit of the wolf mother within us forevermore.”
“Forevermore!”
My father drank and everyone followed suit.
I quickly discovered that I didn’t care for wine. It tasted nothing like I expected. Instead of sweet, the bitter essence hit me the moment the deep red liquid touched my lips, and I fought to keep from making a face when the acrid tang registered. I would gladly trade the vile drink for my uncle’s brew. Though it was harsher, and every sip burned down my throat, I found its smoky flavor much more pleasant.
When my father indicated we return our drinks to small table, I gladly placed the cup to its previous resting place.
My father shifted his gaze between Decker and me, drawing a deep breath before he began again. “The bond between a woman and her man is sacred. It takes time to build a spiritual and loving connection, but once the two of you form that companionship, the bond will be unbreakable. Not even death can diminish what you create together.”
Those words gave me hope for the future. I looked forward to forming such a bond with Decker. There was already a natural, primal connection between us, but I couldn’t wait to build something deeper.
My father took a bowl from the table, the small clay vessel fitting perfectly in his wide palm. He dipped a single finger into the white paint, unable to conceal the sudden emotion in his dark eyes as he stepped close.
He drew the unity symbol on my forehead, his finger transferring the cool paint to my skin. The simple swiping motion soothed me even further, especially knowing what the mark meant to our people. It meant that my companion and I would be one forever.
I watched my father return his finger to the bowl, gather more paint, and then draw the same symbol on Decker’s forehead.
“May the goddess bless you both with the mind, heart, and strength to always be everything your companion needs.”
As if already in harmony, our heads simultaneously turned toward one another. I smiled up at Decker, and his answering grin told me everything would be just fine.
We stared at one another while my father addressed the packs, but I didn’t hear another word he said. Instead, all my focus remained on Decker.
The man was a beast of beautiful proportions and he was all mine. Despite my previous speculating and curiosity over the competitors, fate had intervened and given me Decker.
The faint bruising and minuscule cuts o
n his chiseled face bothered me. As did the hint of swelling around his left eye. While a small part of me wished I could take it all from him, another—more carnal—part of me found his minor injuries arousing. Just knowing he’d sustained every single mark fighting for me only intensified my attraction to him.
My thoughts must have shown clearly on my face, because something in Decker’s eyes shifted. He turned to fully face me, and without preamble, he clasped my cheeks in his big hands and kissed me. It wasn’t a gentle kiss, but an animalistic show of lust and dominance.
I quickly lost myself in the way his mouth moved over mine, the aggressive swipe of his hot tongue waking something in me I didn’t expect, something every bit as demanding as Decker.
By the time he lifted his head, I couldn’t catch my breath. My lids slowly lifted, and his hungry expression only further amplified my need for him.
Before I could dive back in, someone cleared their throat. Tearing my gaze from Decker, I realized the amused chuckle that followed was my father’s.
The weight of the situation registered, and my heart sank. Knowing he’d played witness to my lack of self-control made me sick to my stomach.
“Shall I close the ceremony?”
Laughter and encouraging whistles rose from the onlookers and I knew my face glowed bright red. It felt as if someone had set fire to my skin. I wanted the ground to open beneath me and swallow me whole. How could I have let myself forget where I was? How could I have done that in front of my father…in front of all the packs?
Ignoring my embarrassment, my father—my alpha—held up a hand to silence the crowd. Turning his attention back to Decker and me, he smiled. “May you have a long and happy life together.”
Chapter 14
Broken laws demanded punishment, trial rules of engagement included. Lyall’s blatant disregard of those rules, as well as his lack of self-control, had disqualified him from the trials. Now, he stood with his alpha at the foot of the dais, awaiting his punishment.
Aki, the alpha, raised a hand to quiet the crowd. When the voices died to nothing more than low murmurs, he shifted his hard stare to Lyall. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”
Lyall remained silent.
“Very well. Then I shall get on with it.”
Aki bound Lyall’s hands in front of him and gave the ropes a tug.
“On your knees.”
My heart skipped a beat, but Lyall complied, lowering himself without hesitation. I knew what came next. Aki would whip him in front of everyone.
An unsettling sense of sympathy for the young male filled me. I knew I should be glad for his punishment. He deserved it for what he’d done, but a part of me couldn’t help feeling bad for him.
Aki took the braided leather from a male behind him, uncurling the length as he spoke. “For disregarding alpha orders and for the unnecessary pain you caused your pack mate, you will receive ten lashes.”
Lyall’s cold, remorseless eyes stared blankly ahead. No fear. No nervous anticipation. If anything, he appeared annoyed. I, however, felt tense. It irritated me. I should be savoring the moment.
“Are you ready for your punishment?”
When Aki still received no response, he circled Lyall and shifted his stance. I expected him to draw things out a bit, but he reared back and snapped his arm forward with startling force. The loud crack of leather meeting flesh echoed all around, and everyone watched with unwavering eyes.
Even Lyall simply clenched his teeth. I, on the other hand, flinched involuntarily. I could almost feel the impact from where I sat and the angry red welt already marring his tan skin looked painful.
The second lash came with the same force, leaving a matching mark across his bare back.
Aki dealt out each blow at even intervals. He didn’t slow, didn’t take a moment for Lyall to adjust. The stubborn male held still and quiet until the seventh strike. His back arched slightly, and I read pain in his once stoic features.
As if sensing my discomfort with the merciless display, Decker reached over and took my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. I didn’t bother looking at him. Just the simple act of wrapping his warm, steady fingers around mine soothed me. I had to endure watching the last of Lyall’s punishment, but I found it more tolerable with Decker at my side.
With the final lash, Lyall’s breath left his lungs on a shuddering rush. He swayed and his head fell forward, but he never made another sound.
His stubbornness and strength astounded me. I knew those traits were common among our kind, but I wondered if all wolfkind could so quietly withstand such a brutal punishment.
“On your feet.”
At his alpha’s order, Lyall stood and faced him. Those eyes appeared darker than ever, and I couldn’t tell if it was from anger or pain. Likely a little of both.
Aki stepped close to him. “When you leave here tomorrow, it will not be with my pack. You will spend the next five years with Kene and his men. They will teach you the true meaning of control. You will also learn respect for yourself and for others. Wolfkind is about camaraderie. There is no room for selfishness, insolence, or cruelty among our people. You will change or I will personally banish you from pack life. Forever.”
After all that, Lyall just smirked at him as if the alpha’s words were of no consequence.
Aki’s jaw clenched. He barely held himself in check, but he didn’t reply further. His eyes shifted toward the crowd, and with a subtle tilt of his chin, he beckoned a pack mate forward.
The male instantly responded, moving to stand close.
“Get him out of my sight,” Aki grated.
“With immense pleasure.”
His tone made clear the fury he felt toward Lyall. No pack member showed disrespect for their alpha and went unpunished. Judging how the male shoved Lyall away from the dais, his punishment was far from over. Fortunately, I didn’t have to witness all that. The whipping had been more than enough for my liking.
Aki faced the packs. He stood for a moment, his eyes roaming over those gathered before he spoke. “Such severe punishments are not often used among our people, but sometimes it is necessary. Let this be a lesson to you all: you break wolfkind laws, you suffer the consequences. Remember that as the celebration commences.”
Without another word, he turned and disappeared into the crowd.
My father came forward, his glass in hand. “On that note, let the celebration begin.”
Chapter 15
The celebration continued until the early morning hours. Decker looked beyond done with everyone talking to us. I couldn’t say I blamed him. I’d had more than enough social time, and I didn’t know how much more interaction I could stand.
In truth, only one thing kept me from ditching the celebration sooner: Decker. Just the thought of being alone with him again made me unbelievably nervous. When I’d been in the moment, I’d enjoyed having him all over me, but things had escalated so fast I hadn’t had time to think rationally. Afterward, I found myself doubting whether I was truly prepared for such intimacy with a man. Especially when I thought too much about everything it entailed.
All my plans of getting to know my companion before we moved to the physical wouldn’t happen. Decker had more than sufficiently conveyed his desperation for me during our encounter in the cabin. Though I’d enjoyed it, he had overwhelmed me. I could only hope our next time alone was less intense, but I doubted it would be. Decker didn’t strike me as the gentle type.
As if to prove me wrong, his wide palm rested lightly on my back. Surprised, I looked up at him.
He leaned in close, his warm breath dancing over my ear. “Time for bed.”
A shiver went through me, and I couldn’t be sure if it was the low rumble of his whispered words or the mere thought of being in bed with him.
When I didn’t immediately move, Decker’s knowing eyes met mine. “Neither of us want to be here. No point torturing ourselves any longer.”
That much was true, but was he t
alking about the overwhelming crowd or my putting off the inevitable?
He tilted his chin toward the group of women chatting happily behind me. “Tell your mother goodnight.”
How he knew I’d want to speak with her was beyond me, but I liked that he was so intuitive. Or perceptive, more likely.
I reluctantly left Decker where he stood and approached my mother, grateful he let me go alone. The second she noticed me, she frowned. “What are you still doing out here? I thought you’d be enjoying some alone time with your man.”
I shrugged. “Looks like we’re heading that way, now. I just came to say goodnight.”
“Well, goodnight, sweetheart. Go get him. You don’t want to keep a man like that waiting.”
My face instantly heated. “Mother, please.”
“What? With a beast like that, I wouldn’t have lasted five minutes beyond the ceremony before I dragged him to bed.”
I gaped at her.
“Don’t look at me like that.” She chuckled quietly. “You know you’ve thought about being with him, especially after the way he kissed you.”
“That’s the problem,” I muttered under my breath.
My mother took me by the shoulders and looked me in the eyes. “Do not be afraid of him. He may be intimidating and intense, but I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”
My brows furrowed as I chewed the inside of my cheek. To me, he always looked moody, but that wasn’t the point. I wasn’t scared of him. “I’m just nervous. He’s so big.”
My mother threw her head back and laughed so hard she snorted. I didn’t find my words funny in the slightest, but she clearly did. Judging by her over-the-top reaction, she’d had more than a few glasses of my uncle’s brew. Still, I suspected my ridiculous nervousness would have amused her regardless.
Her laughter faded, and she cupped my cheek. “Let go of your worry, sweetheart. Everything will be just fine. I promise. Now, go enjoy your time bonding with your man.”
She gave me one last hug before nodding toward Decker.
“He’s waiting.”
I turned to find Decker still standing right where I’d left him. Though two males had approached him, he clearly wasn’t listening to whatever they said. His entire focus was on me. The instant I started toward him, he stepped around them, meeting me halfway. He didn’t speak, but I could see the relief in his eyes when I slipped my hand into his.
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