Scarred for Life

  Nicole blinked, as if startled or confused. Dane had said it so casually, like she was talking about a movie on television. There was no shame in her face, but she looked defiant, waiting for Nicole to challenge her on it. The attorney smiled, eyes shimmering with an understanding that Dane should've known would be there.

  "Kid, honestly, I could've guessed that and it doesn't bother me or anything. I don't know who might've cared about that in your past, but I'm not one of those people. Who you love is your business, not that you seem to be loving anyone at the moment." Nicole paused and a teasing grin illuminated her face. "Except for me, anyway," she quipped. She touched Dane's knee in a way that made the younger woman purr.

  "You got me there," Dane concurred, sinking into the sofa.

  ***

  Nicole continued to massage Dane's knee after turning on the radio to light, classical music. Danny was sleeping minutes later. She regarded the snoozing musician and wondered about her. She had a feeling that Danny was accustomed to being lambasted for her sexual orientation. She gathered that much just from knowing Danny's cousin and hearing him talk. But, she had expected Danny to make a commotion about being a lesbian, defending herself and not letting the issue go because of the defiant look those gray eyes had offered.

  Instead, Danny let things drop easily after Nicole showed that it didn't bother her. It was like she instantly believed Nicole. Nicole noticed Danny didn't typically put up a fight or argue. The only time that she saw Danny lose her temper was over their miscommunication when she suggested the younger woman get a job. Other than that, Dane was always laidback, much of the time to the point of being unconscious. It was…nice. It was great to not put up with someone's irritating frustrations and problems most of the time.

  Nicole grabbed a book. She was grateful that the book was within arm's reach. Danny straightened things up perfectly. She always managed to put things Nicole would use in nearby places and things Nicole would never think of were out of the way, but still in sight just in case.

  For a while, the house was completely quiet. Nicole focused on her book, but also took note of the contented feeling that settled in her body. Mumbles drew Nicole's attention from her book. She glanced over at the lanky body near her as Dane awoke from her nap. As usual, Dane's eyes darted about when she first opened them, as if she didn't know where she was. She sat up sharply, blinked a few times in Nicole's direction before yawning.

  "Nick?" Dane said as if she expected someone else.

  "Of course," the redhead answered in a gentle tone. Something inside of her always kept her from teasing Danny at moments like these. There was just something unnerving about the grey-eyed woman's confusion. She suspected the disorientation was related to the nightmares that Dane suffered, which had decreased sharply over the last few weeks.

  "Whatcha reading? A chemistry book?" Dane rubbed her eyes with the heel of her hand.

  "Yes, I'm reading a chemistry book. What's it to you?" Nicole smiled widely.

  "You're weird, reading chemistry books for fun. If you like chemistry so much, why the hell didn't you become a chemist?" the former musician asked with a craned eyebrow.

  Nicole shrugged. "I dunno." The tone of the response was far from their usual teasing banter. She didn't want to think about why she didn't become a chemist and she definitely didn't desire to speak about it.

  Lush lips twisted, turning Dane's mouth upward. It looked like she was going to say something but decided against it. She suddenly stood up.

  "Danny," Nicole said, sensing that she had screwed up.

  "I'm gonna start dinner. We're gonna have fish tonight, okay?" the younger woman announced, trying to sound normal, but her voice was clipped.

  "Danny, sit down," Nicole ordered…well, suggested. It sounded much like a suggestion, but it was meant to be a command.

  Dane waved the request off. "I gotta make dinner if we're going to eat tonight, so let me do that. You go back to your book."

  It was time for the lawyer voice. "Dammit, Danny, why do you have to make things so difficult? Just sit down for a second, so I can talk to you." t

  Dane immediately found her butt planted on the sofa, as if Nicole hit a button to put her down without any of her own conscious control. It wasn't the first time that Nicole managed such a thing. The attorney smiled slightly while Danny sighed.

  "First off, I was playing with you when I said I don't know. I guess I'm not good at this playful thing yet since sometimes you don't know I'm doing it. I'm out of practice, you know?" Nicole remarked with a charming smile.

  "You seem to be doing fine right now," Dane countered in her own impish tone.

  "You bring this out of me. I don't know why, but I feel like I can do this with you and it's very relaxing. I could never play around with Tyler or any other person I was ever in a relationship with. I can't joke around at work, but when I come home to you, I get to unwind and play around." Nicole paused and briefly studied the shadow on the wall. "So, it really bothers me when you get so…well, when you take me seriously when I'm playing and then sort of brush me off."

  Dane rubbed her forehead with two fingers before running her hand through her hair. Her face scrunched up. Nicole chuckled and started massaging the copper forehead with her own two fingers to relax the younger woman's visage.

  "Being playful right now, right?"

  "Indeed, I am. And if you're actually curious as to why I didn't become a chemist, it's because my parents wanted me to be a lawyer." Dane's face only wrinkled more. "My parents were all right with me earning a chemistry degree, but I had to go to law school afterwards."

  "Did they pick what law you'd study, too? Corporate law doesn't seem like you. You seem like you'd at least help the little guy or something."

  Nicole nodded and several emotions surged through her in less than a second. "They didn't outright say it, but it was strongly implied. Both of my parents are in that field of law and they always said they wanted me to follow in their footsteps."

  "And being the good daughter you are, you went with it. Seems a little weird, but I'm guessing it's because I never did anything my parents wanted."

  "Really?"

  "That's a tale for another time, though. We don't really have the time for me to tell you about all of that. Need to make dinner now. So, is fish okay?" Dane asked again, a small smile tugging at her mouth this time.

  A smile brightened her lips. "Sounds great."

  ***

  "Oh, shit," a hiss rang out through the dark house. Footfalls could be heard down the stairs and to the front door.

  Dane went to the doorway of the den and saw Nicole at the front door in her pajamas, putting on her shoes. "And just where do you think you're going, young lady?" Dane inquired, sounding much like a parent having busted an escaping teenager.

  "I left paperwork for my case on my desk. This is what happens when I start thinking about dinner when I'm still at work," Nicole huffed, slipping on one of her shoes. It seemed she was in such a hurry that it didn't even occur to her to put on socks beforehand.

  A low, deep chuckle escaped Dane. "So, the thought of baked chicken got to you that much, huh?" She had surprised Nicole with a call at work, wondering what she should make for dinner.

  "It was everything that you said before you were baking chicken, too. I forgot to eat lunch again, so you just had my stomach when you made your suggestions about dinner. I literally almost drooled thinking about it."

  "You need to take better care of yourself," Dane reprimanded. This wasn't the first time that she heard about Nicole missing meals. She also knew that many nights Nicole didn't get the right amount of sleep, instead staying up to work.

  "Hey, you have nerve to talk. You weighed under a hundred pounds when you first got here." Dane didn't show much of her body in her big t-shirts and baggy shorts, but the sight of her arms and legs hinted that a skeleton used to be hidden underneath her plain clothing.

  "Well, counselor, in my defense, I was in between ho
mes at the time. I was also trying my best to save money in case something happened, so I wouldn't eat unless it was absolutely necessary or free. You have no excuse, though. You skipped lunch to work and now you're trying to go out at a late hour to get more work to do over the weekend. Making it weirder, you're doing work you don't really like." Dane shook her head.

  "It's not about liking it. It's about doing it to the best of my ability, which is what I want to do. In order to do that, I need those briefs on my desk," Nicole countered forcefully as she turned her attention to her other shoe.

  An ebony eyebrow arched at the authority in Nicole's voice. Oh, that must be the lawyer in her coming out. She often wondered how Nicole intimidated people as an attorney, but now she could see it. The strong and fierce pose, the demonic glare in her hard, jade eyes, and the voice as powerful as steel. In theory, she figured it would frighten people; she had forgotten it had worked on her. Currently, it made her want to laugh since she was right for once. She held that in since this was a serious matter.

  "Nick, look, it's eleven at night and the city's crazy. Plus, it's fucking Friday. The traffic, the parking, the insane college kids going to clubs, the drunks, and the general maniacs are all factors in this. You don't want to be out there now and I'm not letting you go out.”

  Nicole blinked, bemusedly. "You're not what?"

  "I'm not letting you out of the house to go downtown, not at this hour. It's too dangerous," Dane said as if that was final.

  The redheaded attorney's jaw tensed. "Who do you think you are, telling me what to do?"

  It was Dane's turn to blink hard. Who am I to tell Nick what to do? Why the hell do I even care? When was the last time I gave a shit about anything? Dane mentally went down a list. The list began and ended with things involving Nicole.

  "Chem, I'm only telling you this because I'm worried about you. I'll be honest, I don't have a fucking clue the last time I worried about someone that didn't come back and bite me in the ass, but I worry about you. I don't want you to go there and something happen to you."

  "You worry about me?" she asked quietly, eyes searching for the truth in cloudy grey orbs.

  A bare toe rubbed against the nacre carpet and a hand went through a mop of onyx hair. "I guess…"

  "Dammit, Danny, just tell me." Nicole huffed, her voice catching in her throat.

  "Yes, I worry, okay? You don't live with someone for damn near two months and get along really well and not have some concern for their safety when they start talking madness about going downtown alone this late on a Friday."

  "Then what do you want me to do? I need those briefs."

  "No, you want those briefs, so you can keep working late into the night when it's already dumb late and keep working through the weekend, on a case you don't like."

  "How do you know I don't like it?"

  Dane shrugged. "Aside from the tone in your voice when I called you today? I know you don't like your job point blank, even though you really don't want to come right out and say it. When you come home and you talk about your day, it's obvious how you feel about the whole thing. It's even more obvious when you don't talk about it. Sometimes it takes you forever just to calm down enough to veg out in front of the TV."

  "I don't mind my job," Nicole argued; her voice wasn't nearly as strong now as it had been moments ago.

  "You might not mind it, but you don't like it. It's just a job, a way to make money. It's not the job for you, though." Dane believed that no one with a compassionate nature like Nicole could really enjoy being a corporate lawyer.

  "You think you know me so well after two months of living together?" An elfish smile tugged at her lips and danced in her eyes.

  "I think I know you need to march your ass right upstairs and read yourself a bedtime story, Chem," Dane remarked with an amused smirk of her own. She went so far as to point back in the direction of the stairs.

  "Danny, I really need those briefs." Nicole eyed the doorknob.

  Dane shrugged. "So? I'm not letting you out. It's too late and you need to chill out on your days off. I'll carry you back upstairs if necessary."

  "Danny, please, I just —"

  "Need to march your ass back upstairs right now. It's as simple as that." Dane pointed upstairs again.

  Nicole's jaw tensed and her fingers twitched in the direction of the doorknob. A sigh escaped her lips and her shoulders slumped. Dane smirked proudly in victory as Nicole slipped her shoe off and went back to her room.

  "It's not a punishment, Chem." Dane called up to the stairs.

  Nicole didn't respond and Dane returned to the den when she heard a door slam upstairs. She flopped down onto the sofa on her back and stared at the ceiling. Her eyes closed without her permission, but the lack of noise let her know that it was safe to sleep.

  ***

  Nicole couldn't believe that she had actually given into Danny. She was on a roll with her late night work session and felt she should keep it up. She might actually be able to get her workload down to a manageable level. Of course, the moment her workload appeared feasible, something else always happened. It was exhausting, but she always did her best. Lounging in her bed when she could be working wasn't doing her best, but she didn't move because of Danny's concern.

  The redhead was stunned to hear Dane openly admit to worrying about her safety as a reason for not letting her out of the house. Her mind drew a blank when checking for times in her life when someone professed worrying for her safety as a reason for her to listen to that person. The confession certainly threw her off balance. She had been a breath away from calling Danny's bluff when Danny threatened to carry her back upstairs if necessary, but something in those eyes told her not to push her luck. The last thing she needed was for Danny to try to prove a point, lift her up, and then they'd both end up falling down the stairs, landing right in the hospital. The mental image made her laugh.

  "Danny is so different." Nicole wasn't sure what that meant, but she liked it enough to dismiss the idea of work and picked up a book on her nightstand. Settling down on her fluffy pillows, she began to read.

  ***

  Doorbells weren't meant to play "Moonlight Sonata." Not that Nicole recalled her doorbell playing such a tune. Flinging her blankets from her body in annoyance, she marched downstairs to stop the irksome noise. At the foot of the stairs, she heard the sound of a loud thud in the den and automatically knew Danny had rolled off the couch, probably shocked out of sleep by the bothersome bell.

  "Did you change the bell?" Nicole asked as she met Dane at the den door. She suspected Danny was also intent on halting the fool waking them up on a Saturday morning. There better be a fire or somebody better be dead on the lawn.

  "I thought it'd be cool," Dane yawned.

  Nicole craned a dark red eyebrow. "You thought this high pitched whine masquerading as Moonlight Sonata would be cool?"

  "It didn't sound like this in the store, I swear. I'll take it out later today," Dane promised as she stuck her fingers in her ears.

  Nicole yanked open the front door. "Yes?" she huffed. She ran a frustrated hand through her wild, auburn locks, which were trying their best to defy gravity.

  "Nikki," Tyler purred with a striking smile.

  "Tyler," Nicole deadpanned. The air around her felt heavier. Her expression, her shoulders, and even her all around demeanor deflated.

  "I'll get coffee," Dane suggested, knowing that it was definitely time for coffee. They needed to be completely awake to hear Tyler be pathetic and for Nicole to purposely curse him out.

  "What the hell?" Tyler's jaw dropped as he watched the familiar form walk off to the left. "Was that Dane? What the hell is she still doing here?" he demanded, glaring at Nicole and trying to see through the wall at the same time to keep an eye on his cousin.

  "What's it to you if it is? You didn't seem too concerned about her when you left before." Nicole glared crossly at him.

  "Are you out of your damn mind? Why the hell are you letting D
ane stay with you. Do you know she's a damn dyke? She might try something with you," Tyler hissed.

  "She hasn't tried anything with me. And, yes, she informed me of her sexual orientation, but thank you for outing her, anyway," Nicole commented sharply. I can't believe the language he uses toward his own cousin.

  Tyler scowled, but regarded Nicole with a haughty look in his chocolate eyes. "Oh, did she happen to inform you that she's a drug addict that can't hold a job, too?"

  The new information wobbled Nicole internally, but she didn't divulge that. She was very effective with keeping her emotions in when necessary. She continued glaring at Tyler, but wondered if Danny was a drug addict. She hadn't noticed anything that would lead her to believe that, but she didn't know much about her good friend's past.

  "How do you know all of that?" Nicole inquired with her mouth turned upward, showing her disbelief. Danny and Tyler weren't the closest cousins on the planet, so she didn't see the point in taking anything that he said at face value.

  "Because I know her. She's trying to take advantage of you. She's a fucking leech. She's probably planning to rob you blind to go buy drugs. She does things like that." Tyler stepped closer, as if he were trying to force his way inside.

  Nicole held her ground, not giving him an inch. "She hasn't done anything like that. What the hell are you doing here, anyway?" she demanded, speaking through a tense, clenched jaw.

  "I brought some papers that you left. Your parents figured you'd need them to work on your case." He held up his briefcase to show that his words were truthful.

  Looking at him, Nicole knew he expected to be thanked, as if he had done something truly altruistic by bringing her documents. Well, she wasn't about to waste her manners on someone that didn't appreciate them. Besides, she knew he used this as an excuse to come to her house and torment her.

  "Give me the documents and leave," she ordered harshly, holding out her hand.

  Tyler blinked and looked as if he had been shot. "I thought that we could talk a little…about us and where we're going."