by Lyn Gardner
“Oh, I know all about those.”
“Well, during her tantrum, she let it slip that she came after me because killing you wouldn’t hurt you as much as if she killed me.”
Robin scrunched up her face. “Say what?”
“It actually makes sense when you think about, Robbie. We both know Pam is all about paybacks. When you broke up with her, she tried to hurt you in every way possible. She lied to your friends about the type of person you were. She made up stories about you and me. She basically did everything in her power to destroy you, and what better payback is there, then to kill me and let you live with the guilt, because that’s precisely what would have happened.”
The color drained from Robin’s face. “It would have destroyed me,” she said in a whisper.
“Exactly, and if Pam had gotten away with it, like she obviously thought she was going to, she could have kicked back and wallowed in yet another victory. Luckily for us, the only thing she’s going to be wallowing in is a prison cell, and by the sounds of it, it’s going to be a very long wallow.”
“What do you mean?”
“Oh, that’s the other reason why it took me so long to come back with the margaritas,” Declan said, grabbing the jug. “Detective Sanchez called, too. Pam was well enough to be arraigned, so they took her in front of a judge this morning.”
“And?”
“As it stands right now, the charges are trespassing, breaking and entering, carrying a concealed weapon, two counts of aggravated assault, two counts of attempted murder, a shitload of parole violations, and drug trafficking.”
“Wait. Drug trafficking?”
“She had a bag of oxy in her pocket along with one holding enough cocaine to charge her with trafficking both of them.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah, I know,” Declan said, and filling a plastic cup, he handed it to Robin. “And what’s really funny is I kind of feel bad for her.”
Robin glanced at Declan. “Me too.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah,” Robin said, swiveling back to stare at the Gulf. “We both know she’s unstable, but I think a psychiatrist could have probably helped her more than prison ever will.”
Robin and Declan sipped their drinks in silence until Robin glanced at Declan to see his expression had turned dark and hawkish. “What’s wrong?”
Declan shook his head. “I was just sitting here thinking about that morning.”
“What about it?”
“About how you think you know yourself until something pushes you over the edge. When I saw Pam holding that knife, I didn’t think. I didn’t consider. I didn’t weigh options. All I knew is that I needed to stop her. No, that’s not right,” Declan said, shaking his head. “I didn’t need to stop her. I was going to stop her...and I launched myself at her like some sort of fucking superhero. I didn’t care about the knife or...or anything else. Hell, I didn’t even know she cut me until after it was all over. All I knew was there was no way in hell she was going to hurt Natalia. And when Pam kept fighting, kept struggling to get back the knife, Robbie, I slammed her face into that lamp with all the strength I had.” Declan hung his head. “So much for never hitting a girl.”
“You were protecting Natalia, Declan. The cops said you had every right to do what you did to stop her.”
“I know, and I’d do it again if I had to. I just wish I hadn’t fucked up her face.”
“How bad was it?”
Declan thought for a moment before letting out a long sigh. “Think Picasso.”
Robin took a few gulps of her drink in hopes of diluting that image, and shifting in her chair, she looked out across the Gulf.
***
Judy made her way down the access ramp to the beach, across cracked planks partially covered by sand. She breathed in the briny air, and as she reached the end of the walkway, she kicked off her flip-flops, knocked off the sand, and dropped them into her netted beach bag. The carryall was one of many recent purchases. At first, she thought she could do without, but mentally tallying up only the most necessary of items, the lightweight sack was just large enough to carry the keys to her rental car, her phone, a towel from the hotel, a bottle of water, and now, her sandals. The rest of the things Judy needed at the beach she was wearing.
The kiss of the sun’s warmth caressed her shoulders as Judy stepped onto the fine white sand and moved between the dunes. Iconic sea oats swayed in the breeze along with the cordgrass and beach-elder, and weaving its way through the brush was a vine dotted with lavender flowers, its color distinct against the surrounding green.
Emerging from the protection of the dunes, Judy pushed her mirrored aviators to the top of her head. For a moment, she squinted at the brilliance of the sun, its radiance streaming down from a cloud-free sky of blue, but without the darkly tinted lenses, the magnificent crystalline cyan of the Gulf came into view. “Wow,” Judy said in a breath as she took it all in. A minute later, she filled her lungs again with the salty air and readjusting her sunglasses on her face, Judy set off down the sand.
Given the fact it was a weekday, the beach wasn’t crowded, and she meandered past sun worshipers who, like squatters, had claimed their places in the sun with chairs, umbrellas, coolers, and boom boxes. Children wearing vividly-colored water wings ran to and fro carrying plastic pails and shovels in their hands and a few parents, with reddened faces, blew into inflatable toys and floats hoping to provide even more entertainment for the youngsters.
Judy veered toward the water, enjoying the balmy breeze off the Gulf as she watched plovers and terns scamper and dance near the waves while, in the distance, gulls swooped and cried as they dove for their food. She stepped around the occasional piles of beach wrack, the entangled seagrass, reeds, and algae common where water meets the shore, but when she came across a section covered in broken shells, Judy headed back to dry sand.
Although to onlookers, it would have appeared she was in no rush, her movement casual and her attention all-encompassing, Judy was merely focused on her goal. Somewhere down the beach was the woman she loved, and once she found her, Judy had no intention of ever letting go. She also had no intention of forgetting anything that had brought her to this point.
From the three flights and sixteen hours of delays and layovers to the time spent at the International Plaza shopping mall in Tampa buying what she didn’t pack, Judy had committed everything to memory and today was no different. She never wanted to forget the smell of the salt air and the feel of the warm sand under her feet, or the intensity of the sun heating her skin and the sounds of the waves lapping against the shore. Judy burned every detail into her mind because she knew she’d never repeat this day…for it was the first day of the only life she had ever wanted.
The blast of a ferry horn broke Judy from her thoughts, and hunting through her bag, she pulled out her phone. Unable to see the screen because of the sun, Judy darted under a vacant umbrella and read the text.
“Where the hell are you!!!!”
Amused by Declan’s overkill of punctuation, Judy replied, “No place to park at condo. Found a lot about a mile north. I’m on the beach, heading your way now. 10-15 minutes max.”
***
Declan pocketed his phone and stretching out his legs, he crossed them at the ankles as he reached for the margarita jug. “So, have you given any thought as to what you’re going to do?”
Robin gave Declan a side-eyed glance. “About what?”
Declan shrugged. “Are you planning to stay on Mackinac or...or sell it all and move somewhere else?”
“I’m not going to sell,” Robin said, holding out her cup for Declan to refill. “It’s hard to explain, especially now after...after what’s happened, but it feels like home up there. I know it’s not going to be easy, and it’ll be a while before I can ever sleep in that bedroom again, but Mackinac holds a lot of good memories.” Robin paused and took a deep breath. “And I finally understand something Maxine said to me once.”
“That Adele would have taken only one day a year if that’s all my mother could have given her because I feel the same way. I only had a few months with Judy and...and only one night, and I’m not saying it was enough. God, it so wasn’t enough, but everything we were together is a part of that house and that island, and I can’t walk away from it. I just can’t.”
As Robin sniffled back her emotions, Declan quickly glanced down the beach before he topped off Robin’s drink. “I get that. I really do, but aren’t you a little young to live like a nun?”
“I don’t care about that, Declan. I’ve had my one true love. I’m done.”
“Okay, we need to do something to get you out of this funk,” Declan said, scrubbing his fingers through his hair. “Hey, how about we play that game we used to play? We’re not drunk yet, but we’re close enough. What do you say?”
“What in the hell are you talking about?”
Declan was in his forties, but his grin belonged to an impish little boy. “Rate the Babes on the Beach.”
Robin stared blankly back at Declan. “That wasn’t my game. It was yours, and you’re off the market.”
“I’m not off the market until I propose to Natalia, and that won’t be for another few weeks.”
“Excuse me?”
“Okay, you’re right,” Declan said with a laugh. “I’m happily off the market, but that doesn’t mean we can’t find you someone. I mean, come on,” he said, spreading his arms wide. “The Gulf coast is a mecca for lesbians.”
“I’d hardly call it a mecca,” Robin said, giving Declan the once-over. “And I am not interested.”
“Then humor me. After all, you’re not the only one who’s had a hell of a week,” Declan said, tenderly running his fingers across the bandages encasing his forearm.
Robin’s mouth went slack, Declan’s overt play on her sympathies as transparent as it was triumphant. “Okay,” Robin said with a sigh. “Whatever. Go for it.”
“Great!” Declan said, briskly rubbing his hands together. “Now...let’s see.”
Declan scanned the beach, shading his eyes as he searched for the least likely of candidates. “Got one,” he said, leaning closer to Robin. “At your ten o’clock. Cargo shorts. Halter top. Undeniably gay.”
Robin adjusted her sunglasses lower on her nose, and changing her focus, she saw the woman almost instantly. Cargo shorts well past her knees. A halter top straining to hold back 44DDs, and enough lambda and labrys tattoos covering her beefy arms to make her sexuality more than known. “Are you serious?”
“What? You’ve dated large women before.”
“I have, but after Judy do you really think—”
“Yeah, I suppose you’re right. Okay, cross her off the list,” Declan said as he scoured the beach for his next nominee. “At your nine. Board shorts. Striking style choices.”
Robin turned her head. Down the beach was a woman wearing a sleeveless T-shirt with Proud to be Gay painted in red across the black-and-white stripes, clashing effortlessly with her green and blue plaid board shorts. The combination should have been enough to grab anyone’s attention, but her blue Mohican hairstyle guaranteed it. “That’s strike two. One more and me humoring you is over.”
Declan faked a frown. “All right. Guess that means I’ve gotta find a good one.”
“Or we could just stop playing.”
“Nope. The rules are I get three strikes.” Declan looked to his right and surveyed the beach, and a second later, every laugh line he owned made an appearance. “Okay. I’ve got a winner. Your three o’clock. Aviators. Prismatic wrap.”
Robin let out a long, exaggerated sigh and peering over the top of her sunglasses, she looked down the beach. Again, Declan’s description was scant, but amidst the people dotting the sand, the woman’s sarong in the colors of the rainbow flag stood out. The black one-piece she wore dipped provocatively in the front. With no embellishment Robin could see, it was chic and understated, yet the seductive flash of one thigh peeking through the wrap as she strolled down the sand amplified her gender nicely. And even though the colorful stripes announced her proclivity, they weren’t accompanied by tattoos, spiked hair, or hoops of metal pierced through her skin.
Robin’s cursory once-over lasted only a few seconds before she turned back to face the water. She calmed the hair on the back of her neck and just before she was about to take a drink, she said, “And that’s strike...”
The diluted mixture of tequila, Cointreau, and lime juice in Robin’s cup began to ripple. She told herself her mind was playing tricks on her. After all the hours Robin had spent over the past few days thinking about only one person, why wouldn’t a woman with salt-and-pepper hair remind of her of Judy? It was just a coincidence the woman had the same hairstyle, the same petite frame, the same...walk?
Robin’s breath caught in her throat. Whether encased in denim or in corduroy, Robin had ogled Judy’s bottom enough to have memorized the swing of the woman’s hips. A casual sway combining confidence and femininity, there had never been an ounce of flaunt in the movement, never an ounce of exaggeration to catch someone’s eye, just like the woman walking toward her. Exactly like the woman walking toward her.
Declan moved closer until his chin was almost resting on Robin’s shoulder. “If I were you, I’d give that last one another look,” he said, taking the cup from Robin’s trembling hand. “And I have a funny feeling I’m about to become the third wheel, so I’m going to head out.” Kissing Robin on the cheek, he whispered, “I love you, kiddo. Be happy. You deserve it.”
Choked by emotion, all Robin could do was bob her head in reply. For a few seconds, her shoulders continued to heave as she fought hard against her tears until taking a deep, ragged breath, Robin pushed herself to her feet. Tossing aside her sunglasses, she wiped the tears from her face with the back of her hand before ducking out from under the umbrella. For a second, she had to shield her eyes from the sun, but with Judy now only a few feet away, once Robin saw the face she thought she’d never see again, the dam let loose for the second time. Cupping her hands over her mouth, Robin tried to quiet her sobs as tears trickled down her cheeks.
Judy pushed her sunglasses up and smiled at the woman bawling in front of her. “Not really the reaction I was going for.”
Robin huffed out a laugh between her sobs. “What...what are you doing here?”
“I’m here because I finally figured out that when you know who you want, when you know who you love, when you know who you need to feel complete, you find that person, and you tell them. You tell them you love them more than anything else in the world. You tell them you can’t live without them, and you tell them if a choice has to be made, no matter what that choice is, you’ll choose them and only them...and I have. I love you, Robin. I love you beyond any words, any sonnets, or any universe, and I have loved you since the first moment I saw you...and there was no way in hell I was going to say that over the—”
Chapter Forty-Six
Unlike the night they had spent in the shadows of a room lit only by candles, no shadows existed today. The blinds on the patio door were opened to the extreme and sunlight flooded the room. It was one of four bedrooms in the third-floor condo, and overlooking Longboat Key beach, there was no worry about prying eyes or nosy neighbors with binoculars...not that the two women cared.
Judy smiled into the kiss, just as she did when Robin had pulled her into her arms on the beach. Just like she had done in a shower lasting only long enough to wash away salt, sand, and SPF, and just like she had done when their towels dropped to the floor seconds before they fell onto sheets, crisp and white.
In photographs, the difference between black and white is called contrast. Without it, no image would exist because it would be lost in the gray of nothingness. In life, contrast brings with it a new definition. It can be the difference between tall and short, round and lanky, or reserved...and unrestrained.
In the dimness of Robin’
s bedroom on Mackinac, Robin had taken Judy to orgasm more times than she could remember, but through it all, Judy had barely said a word. A few had slipped out, unpreventable as passion soared, but hesitant to speak for fear words of love would emerge, Judy had bit her lip more than once. She had silenced her breathy encouragements and censured her throaty directives, and even though she had opened her eyes at times, she had closed them just as quickly. She had wanted to remember the touch of Robin’s hands and the feel of her mouth and tongue on her body, but amidst the yearning on Robin’s face, there had always been a modicum of sadness, a tinge of dread at what the morning would bring...but no more. No more.
Before Robin had a chance to cover Judy’s body with her own, Judy took the upper hand, and straddling Robin’s thighs, she gazed down at her victim. “I love you,” she whispered seconds before she claimed Robin’s mouth in a wet, probing kiss. She ravaged Robin’s mouth with her tongue, sucking on Robin’s when it was offered until they were both out of breath. Judy broke out of the kiss and sitting up, her eyes roamed over what was before her.
Robin’s skin had been honeyed by the sun, her fairness now showing only in areas once protected by a periwinkle bikini, and it was those areas which held Judy’s focus. Perfect breasts tipped with rose-hued nipples rose and fell in time with Robin’s breathing, and as Judy’s eyes locked with Robin’s, she reached out and covered the mounds. Judy watched in awe as Robin’s expression began to change as Judy fondled and squeezed the orbs, and when she scissored her fingers around the points, they grew even more rigid, much too stiff to go to waste.
Judy rocked forward, covering one delectable tip in her mouth and circling the beaded nipple with her tongue as she continued to knead Robin’s other breast, she felt Robin’s hands on her waist. For a moment, they were still, but as they started to travel, Judy stopped what she was doing long enough to capture Robin’s hands and trap them under her own. “No,” she said, smiling down at Robin. “Right now...right now, this is all about me loving you.”