Should he do it now?
Wait until it was closer to the date?
Had Nick just been kidding when he’d said he’d go with him?
Jeremy tapped a finger against his lips, thinking. Maybe he should make a list of pros and cons about calling now versus later.
Distracted by his thoughts, he grabbed his mocha and stepped away from the counter to make room for a couple of giggling teenagers who looked like they needed a cupcake fix. Once they were gone, he would ask Lucy her opinion.
Or maybe he’d just wait for a sign.
His phone buzzed again, reminding him that he hadn’t read the last incoming text, either. He looked down just as he brought the cup to his mouth, then spit-laughed coffee all over the screen as he read the overabundance of enthusiastic punctuation that awaited him.
It was a sign.
Lucy handed him a napkin, sending pointed, curious looks at his phone while the teens dithered over how much sugar to load themselves up with. Jeremy wiped the phone down, then flipped it around to show her the screen once he’d de-mocha’d it.
Candi had obviously restrained herself with the first text:
Hi, Jeremy! It’s Candi! From Edison! Are we still on for dinner next weekend? Can’t wait to see you and Nick! XOXO
But Jeremy’s failure to instantly respond had clearly pushed her into panic mode:
Jeremy!!!! Please let me know if you’re both coming!!!! I need a headcount!!!!
“Must be an off day,” Lucy deadpanned. “Only a dozen exclamation points from your new bestie? She’s slipping.”
Jeremy laughed, his heart lifting as she turned away to ring up the cupcake order. It was a sign. He was going to have to get in touch with Nick now, right?
“Seriously, Luce,” Jeremy said as soon as the customers left. “‘XOXO’… ? The girl wouldn’t even have given me the time of day ten years ago.”
“But now look at all the things you’ve done with your life! You’re interesting! You’re successful! You’ve got a hot, gay boyfriend! You know how us straight girls love that shit. Her little dinner party won’t be complete without you.”
Jeremy knew Lucy’s teasing was in fun, but for all his new commitment to making something more of his life, hearing himself described that way still sounded ridiculous, even to him. A wave of self-doubt threatened to swamp his I-have-an-excuse-to-call-Nick-now euphoria.
“Seriously, Lucy,” he said, visions of impending humiliation dancing in his head. “Even if I show up with the hot, gay boyfriend, there’s no way anyone’s going to buy the rest of it if I go to Candi’s dinner thing. I should have just told her it was all a joke. What was I thinking?”
“Well, you still can, you know.” She reached across the counter and tapped his phone. “Go ahead. Send her a message and claim April Fools.”
“I’m a couple of weeks late for that.”
“Pfft. Details.” She squeezed his hand. “But seriously, Jeremy, don’t get sucked into the reunion whirlpool if you don’t want to be. You really can just tell her it was all a prank. Or don’t tell her anything at all. You don’t have to go to her meeting… dinner… party. Whatever it is. You’re free to carry on with your life and pretend the whole thing never happened.”
She was right. At least, right enough to calm him down from his impending freak-out. He didn’t have to make Candi believe that what he’d posted was real. And in the end, it didn’t really matter whether she believed him or not. It wasn’t about her.
But Lucy was also wrong.
“I… can’t.”
It wasn’t that he cared so much, really, what Candi thought of him. Okay fine, he did, of course, in terms of short-term embarrassment, but he’d never been the type to let other people’s opinions stop him about stuff that really mattered.
It was more that he wanted what Lucy had said about him to be true. He wanted to do things with his life.
Be interesting!
Be successful!
And, for sure, having a hot, gay boyfriend wouldn’t hurt, either. Especially when that hot, gay boyfriend was Nick.
So yeah, even though that last part was just pretend, he would have gone to Candi’s just for the excuse to play make-believe with Nick for a few hours. But as for the rest, even though the Facebook post had started as a joke, he didn’t want to deny it, or avoid it, or forget about it.
He wanted to become it.
Although, really. Rock climbing? He rolled his shoulders back, still feeling a bit of the burn from the things Nick had made him do at the gym earlier in the week. Maybe his list of “accomplishments” had been overreaching just a little. Still, he was twenty-eight years old. As much as he loved reading about fictional people’s adventures—not to mention their love lives—it was past time to start living his own.
“Okay,” Lucy said, clapping her hands together in what Jeremy recognized as her playtime-is-over-so-let’s-get-serious mode. “If you’re not going to come clean, then you need to prepare for dinner with Candi ‘n’ Co. All you have to do is show up and break up, right? Then you’ll never have to see her again. How hard can that be?”
“Lord knows I’ve had enough practice,” Jeremy said, laughing despite himself. If nothing else, his horrendous dating history definitely qualified him as something of an expert when it came to that particular skill.
Lucy grinned. “Wax on…” she said, doing a fair impression of the karate kid. It was a not-so-subtle reference to Eric, another of his exes.
Jeremy rolled his eyes. He’d honestly tried to appreciate Eric’s enthusiasm for his vintage car collection, but since the man’s idea of foreplay had generally involved inviting Jeremy over to watch him detail his “babies”—not help, because God forbid Jeremy accidentally smudge the chrome, but just watch—the whole thing hadn’t lasted long.
Much like Eric himself… in every possible context.
“Anyway,” Lucy said. “This Nick said he’d go with you, right? So it sounds like you’re golden.”
Jeremy grinned, more excited about his scheduled break-up with Nick than he had been about the last three guys he’d gone out with.
“What does it say about me that faking it with a straight guy is now my idea of a good date?”
“Don’t think of this as a date,” Lucy said cheerfully. “Think of it as taking a breather from wasting your time with the wrong kind of man. And at least Nick sounds like a good sport. You might even have fun.”
Jeremy was 110% sure that there was no “might” about it. Even being forced to actually break a sweat with the stupidly-heavy weight things hadn’t dampened the fun he’d had with Nick at the gym. Jeremy couldn’t remember the last time he’d been around someone so easy going. Nothing seemed to bother Nick, and his good cheer had been contagious. And yes, fine, Gavin may have been right; Jeremy had probably—okay, definitely—been flirting with the man. But despite Nick being disappointingly straight, he’d acted totally unfazed by it. Amused, even, but in a way that made Jeremy feel like they were sharing the joke rather than that Nick was laughing at him.
And maybe, now that he thought about it, the reason being with Nick had felt so different—so right—wasn’t that the two of them had some kind of insta-bond, but just that Jeremy hadn’t been trying so damn hard. Knowing he wasn’t going to get a happy ending with the guy—either kind—had freed him up to stop looking for Nick’s inevitable fatal flaw and just be himself.
“So how is the big break up going to work, exactly?” Lucy asked. “Please tell me you’ll stage a telenovela-style scene, complete with tears, tragedy, and flying food…?”
“Oh my God, I sincerely hope not,” Jeremy said, grinning. “But maybe I should talk to Nick about it and make sure we’re on the same page.”
“You just want an excuse to see your fake boyfriend again,” she accused playfully.
True. He wasn’t going to be stupid about it—hopefully—but he also wasn’t going to deny himself the opportunity to spend a little more time with the man
. Assuming, of course, that Nick still wanted to.
“What, I can’t window shop?” he asked, already pulling out his phone.
“Knock yourself out, Jeremy,” she said with a wink as the little bell over the door of the bakery announced another customer. She handed Jeremy a little piece of heaven—a.k.a. biscotti—to go with his mocha, then turned her attention to the new arrival.
Jeremy pulled up Nick’s contact info on his phone and tapped out a quick text, ignoring the surge of anticipation he felt. He was not going to crush on Nick.
Not.
Well, okay, that was a lie. But he was definitely going to stop.
Soon.
Hi, Nick. It’s Jeremy, you know, your boyfriend from the gym. ;-) Can we talk about dinner with Candi?
Lucy was watching him intently, and as soon as he hit “send” she did some of her patented silent eyebrow-wiggle communication as the customer she was waiting on dithered between frosted sugar cookies and double-fudge brownies—although why anyone would even hesitate when faced with the choice, Jeremy had no idea. The correct answer was clearly “both”—but Jeremy ignored Lucy’s raging curiosity in favor of staring intently at his screen as he waited for Nick’s response.
Had writing “your boyfriend” been too much? Nick would know he was joking, right? And, God, Nick would actually remember him, right?
Jeremy told himself to stop being weird about it.
That was the old Jeremy.
New Jeremy wasn’t going to become a bundle of nerves just because Nick hadn’t answered yet.
It had been less than a full minute, according to the time stamp, and Nick was probably a busy guy. Jeremy should really put the phone away and head back to Sir Reads-a-lot and get on with his day. He could check for an answer later. Worst case scenario, Nick would blow him off, and life would go on. Getting dumped by a fake boyfriend should be infinitely easier than all the times it had happened with real ones, right? And really, it had only been… two minutes. Jeremy didn’t need to start reading too much into the delay. Not that any sane person would count two minutes as a “delay,” but still, he really needed to get his mind off Nick—
His phone buzzed with an incoming call, and an entire flock of butterflies burst into life in his stomach, proving that he was failing completely at the not-crushing-on-the-straight-guy thing.
He’d definitely have to get a handle on that.
This was all pretend.
“Is it Nick?” Lucy mouthed from behind the counter, staring pointedly at his phone.
Jeremy nodded as he tapped the answer button.
“Hey,” he said. Calm, casual, collected. The epitome of cool.
“What’s up, J?”
Jeremy grinned, his cheeks stretching so wide that it actually hurt.
Somehow, he’d managed to get through the majority of his life without anyone ever giving him a nickname. Until Nick. Who’d actually given him two, if anyone was keeping count. Even if the “Pumpkin” had been a joke.
“Um, Candi’s dinner?” he asked, reminding Nick of the text he’d just sent. He cleared his throat, adding, “Did you still want to go?”
“Sure,” Nick answered easily. “She was talking to me about it when she was in this morning, actually. She’s… excited.”
Jeremy laughed at the dry tone Nick delivered the last word in.
“I don’t think I could get out of it if I wanted to at this point,” Nick added, joining in on the laughter.
Jeremy tapped a finger against his lips, trying to analyze that last statement. Was Nick trying to say he wanted to get out of it?
“And no,” Nick said, apparently reading his mind. “Before you can ask, I don’t want to get out of it. I’m glad you called.”
Jeremy steadfastly refused to acknowledge what hearing that did to him. Nick was either going to be a) a new friend, or b) do him a one-off favor and then disappear from his life, but definitely not c) be the one guy who could break Jeremy’s life-long streak of bad luck with men, because d) Nick had very clearly stated that he was not gay, and e) despite the fact that two of Jeremy’s best friends had fallen in love with straight men who—miraculously—had ended up loving them right back, f) Jeremy knew better than to expect lightning to strike twice.
Well, three times.
Because getting his hopes up like that would be… exactly like him. The old him, that is. And that had never ended well.
“You still there, J?”
“Sorry! I was just—” Talking myself out of crushing on you. Again. “—thinking about what we should do about Candi’s thing.”
“Gotta admit, it’s been a while since I’ve been on any sort of date, and I’ve never been on a gay one.”
“Fake gay date,” Jeremy corrected, mostly to remind himself.
“Right,” Nick answered, rolling with it. “Next Saturday? And you said you’re off at six? Do you want me to pick you up?”
“Well, actually, I was thinking that maybe we should get together beforehand, so we can plan the break up.”
“That sounds good,” Nick said. “When do you want to get together?”
Jeremy smiled again. Well, technically, “still”—he wasn’t sure he’d actually stopped at any point during the call—but it felt more like “again,” since hearing that Nick was up to getting together before their non-date made his smile get bigger.
Actually, everything about Nick seemed to make his smile get bigger. The man just made him happy.
In a strictly not-crushing sense, of course.
“How about tomorrow?” Jeremy suggested, given that “right now” sounded a little too eager, even for him.
“I’ve got my daughter with me tomorrow.”
“Um, okay.” Jeremy had never dated a guy with a kid before. Well, not that the word “before” applied—technically—since he was not, in fact, dating Nick. “My store is closed on Mondays, so if you wanted to wait until then, I’m off all day.”
“I don’t want to wait,” Nick said, sounding like he might be smiling, too. “Tomorrow’s good for me, as long as you don’t mind meeting up somewhere that Ava can entertain herself. She’s six.”
“You could bring her to Sir Reads-a-lot?” Jeremy asked, refusing to get excited about the “I don’t want to wait” comment.
Was the man testing his resolve? New and Improved Jeremy wasn’t going to fall for it.
“Is that your bookstore?” Nick asked.
“Yes,” Jeremy said. “And we do story time on Saturdays. Kelley, the girl who works for me, does chapter books for your daughter’s age group. They just finished one last week, and tomorrow she’s starting The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.”
“Okay,” Nick said. “Ava would probably like that. What time?”
Nick didn’t sound as enthusiastic as Jeremy thought the book warranted, but then again, he might be a little biased. It was one of the first books he’d been read as a child, and he’d become so impatient with the one-chapter-per-night bedtime routine that he’d eventually just taught himself to read so he didn’t have to wait on his grandmother.
He knew that some people liked to criticize the series for being out of date, but as far as he was concerned, the book would always be a classic. He’d readily approved it when Kelley suggested it. Although really, he always tended to do that with her suggestions. It had been Kelley's brilliant idea to start story time in the first place, along with their summer reading programs, and the adult book groups she ran, and… a million things that helped keep the store afloat. The girl was a genius, and he was dreading losing her once she graduated college.
“Have you already read Ava The Chronicles of Narnia?” Jeremy asked, wondering if that was why Nick’s voice had sounded less animated than Jeremy thought the book deserved.
“Nope.”
“Oh. Okay,” Jeremy said, wondering if Nick’s answer had actually been as abrupt as it had sounded.
Had Jeremy offended him in some way?
Should he as
k?
Was he overthinking it?
Yes.
He was.
The man had already told him he wasn’t that into books, and Jeremy could hear voices in the background, along with the clang of gym things. Right. Nick was working.
Jeremy cleared his throat. “Um, well if tomorrow works for you, story time is at eleven o’clock for her age group. So maybe if you come by a little earlier than that—” I can see you sooner. “—I can introduce your daughter to Kelley and some of our other regular kids.”
“Sounds good, J.” Nick said. “I’ve got to go. Send me the address for GPS.”
“Great,” Jeremy said, ignoring the butterfly infestation that having actual plans to see Nick reignited in his stomach. “So… okay. I’ll see you tomorrow morning, then.”
“We’ll shoot for 10:30,” Nick said. “And, J?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m looking forward to breaking up with you.”
Jeremy grinned. It was definitely the first time hearing something like that had made his heart flutter.
He was going to pretend that hadn’t happened, though.
Jeremy had a huge wall clock hanging in the store with Reading Solves Everything printed on its face. He’d had it so long that, for the most part, he’d stopped noticing it, but this morning he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off the thing. Not that he expected Nick to show up with his daughter at exactly 10:30 on the dot. If the other parents who brought their kids to story time were any indication, being timely with children in tow seemed a bit hit and miss.
Unlike at Gavin’s bakery, Jeremy didn’t have a bell on the door to announce the arrival of new customers, so when he felt a tug on the back of his shirt, it startled the heck out of him. He spun around, letting out an embarrassing squeak.
“You sound like a hare,” the ridiculously cute little girl staring up at him said.
Jeremy didn’t recognize her as one of the regulars, and his hand immediately flew to his hair, smoothing it down in the back where it tended to get a cowlick. His eyes flicked back over his shoulder at the clock—10:29—before returning to his newest little customerlette.
The Delicious Series: The First Volume Page 47