by KB Winters
Sadie was right. Adding Jameson to the payroll would pay off. It already had. I reached for the forgotten glass of whiskey, downed it, and looked at Ellison.
“Fucking Beck.” It was almost like the bitch was daring me to kill her.
“She didn’t say shit to me about it, or Marshall as far as I can tell, which means she’s fucking with you.”
I agreed with his assessment. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to goad her, to bring her so close to orgasm, and then leave her hanging, but fuck it, I couldn’t resist. No matter what she said or did from this moment forward, I would always have that to hang over her fucking head.
Jameson’s phone rang, and he grabbed it before the second ring. “Hey babe, what’s up?” He listened with the smile of a man in love and sighed. “On my way.” He pushed out of the chair and headed for the door, a man on a mission.
“Where do you think you’re going? We’re not done here.” Ellison always came through regarding intel, but goddamn, the dude needed to learn who the fuck was in charge.
“You might not be done, but I am. I gave you the intel, but the Green Zone is the jurisdiction of Glitz PD, not Vegas. Nothing more I can do.”
He didn’t need to say he couldn’t do shit in Vegas, either, he was still a rookie and could only offer up intel.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, Maddie’s water broke, and Molly is taking her to the hospital, which means I’m about to meet my baby boy.”
Without another word, Jameson strolled out of my office, whistling.
What the fuck kind of maniac whistled?
“Beck is becoming more than a nuisance,” Terry said, annoyance darkening his tone.
“She is, but killing her now would bring too much heat, so we need to play this smart.”
Beck was just cocky enough that she would make a mistake too big to take back, and I was just the man to push her into that.
“The bigger issue is that someone’s been running their fucking mouth. We switch up shift times every couple days, so how the fuck does GPD know when to come?”
If there was a fucking mole, I’d find them and make them regret it.
Terry nodded. “I’ll head over to Lucky Lopez now, review the security footage to see who she’s been talking to.”
“Good idea. Talk to Thomas since he’s running the floors tonight. Tell him what’s going on. Make sure he staggers shift times of the dancers and staff. If he’s got any truly underage girls there, get them the fuck out. We don’t deal in pedophilia.”
“Got it. You gonna be all right here on your own?”
I glared up at my best friend, who knew me a little too well.
“Don’t look at me like that. It’s obvious you got something else on your mind. You worried about someone finding the bodies of The Psychos?”
“No, should I be worried?” Our clean-up crew didn’t make mistakes like leaving any bit of evidence behind. I paid them well, so they knew better.
“Fuck no,” Terry smiled. “I chopped ’em up and left a big pile to keep the crew on their toes. What’s fucking with your head, if not The Psychos?”
I didn’t have time to bitch about Mo right now. “I’ll tell you about it later.” Terry nodded and left, and I picked up the phone to reach out to a few contacts on the Glitz police payroll.
When my contact picked up, I barked, “Why the fuck did I have to learn about the Lucky Lopez raid from someone not at Glitz PD?”
The officer on the other end of the line stammered, fearful and quiet, which was exactly the reason I’d called him on the precinct phone. “I just found out myself, Mr. Ashby.”
“More than five minutes ago?”
“About thirty minutes ago, yeah, but we just got our assignments.”
“Not fucking good enough, Stewart. This is the kind of shit that warrants a text message, no matter what the fuck you’re doing.”
“Understood.”
“Anything else I need to know?” I listened, pinching the bridge of my nose as he outlined the whole fucking night.
“That’s all I know, but you’ll be my first call if I find out anything else.”
“That’s what I want to hear,” I told him and ended the call. Goddamn Beck was determined to add as much stress to my life as fucking possible.
“Fuck!”
My cell vibrated across the desk, lighting up with an incoming text message. “Feel like shit. Not coming in today.”
Mo.
I was ready to lose my shit, and I couldn’t afford to have a mental breakdown right now. After a quick pour of Velvet Fire, I knew what I had to do. Who I needed to see to find my equilibrium.
Sadie.
“Jasper.”
Thomas called to me from a bench surrounded by flowers just off to the side of the hospital, a thick cloud of cigar smoke surrounding him. “We need to talk.”
His words put me on edge, and it had nothing to do with his commanding tone, which I didn’t fucking appreciate.
“Not now, Thomas. I’m going to visit Ma.”
“We need to talk, Jasper.” There was something in his tone that had my feet moving towards him instead of the hospital entrance.
“Shouldn’t you be at Lucky Lopez getting ready for the raid?”
Thomas nodded slowly. “I spoke to Terry and made the changes you requested. I’ll be heading there soon. You realize we have no underage girls on the payroll, right?”
“I didn’t think we did, but you should be there, anyway,” I barked, angry that he was out here enjoying a smoke and the sunshine when every fucking thing was falling apart.
“Goddammit, Jas. We need to talk. About Sadie.”
“What about her?”
He sighed and removed his sunglasses to reveal red, puffy eyes. If I didn’t know better, I might think he’d been crying, but Thomas never cried, not once in all the time I’ve known him.
“The doctor said it’s time we consider our options. Sadie’s been in a coma for months. She’s not waking up even though she should already be awake and cursing everybody out. She’s healing fine, but she won’t wake up.”
“What the fuck does that mean, consider our options?”
“It means either moving her to a long-term care facility or letting her go.”
“Go where?” My heart pounded against my chest at the implications of what he was saying. “I hope you’re not talking about killing my Ma because that’s not fucking happening.”
“You know I would never suggest a stupid fucking option like that. But you’re walking around like an angry kid ready to set the world on fire, which is probably why the doctor spoke to me first.”
“Well, that’s not a fucking option.”
Thomas nodded. “I told him as much.”
“This is bullshit.” I shook my head, unable to believe that we were already at this point, talking about pulling the fucking plug on Sadie.
“Such fucking bullshit. She needs to wake the fuck up.” I said the words more to myself than to Thomas, who was on his feet at my side, one hand gripping my shoulder.
“Relax, Jasper. The doctor is just doing his job, making sure you know what your options are.”
I shrugged off his touch. “My options are for Sadie to wake the fuck up,” I told him and started back toward my car.
“She will. You know your mother does everything in her own fucking time.”
It was true, but right now, that thought didn’t bring me much fucking comfort. “You keep saying that, but she isn’t waking up, Thomas.” I reached my car and leaned inside, pulling out the gun that was always at my hip except when I went in to see Sadie. “It’s time I forced the issue.”
“Don’t do anything you’ll regret, Jasper. I know this is your hospital, but this isn’t the answer.”
Thomas kept up with me as I stormed inside the hospital, ignoring the loud buzzing sound of the metal detectors going off.
“It’s all right,” I heard Thomas say, his hand back on my shoulder. “Calm the fuck d
own, Jas.”
“Not now. I can’t. This is too fucking important, Thomas, and I need answers. Don’t you?”
“Damn right I do, but there has to be a reason she hasn’t woken up yet. Her body is almost fully healed, so there’s no reason other than pure fucking obstinance.”
I stopped and stepped onto the elevator. “What the fuck is the reason, Thomas?”
He stepped in and punched the floor button. “I don’t fucking know, Jasper. Sadie has a lot of demons. Maybe she’s making peace with them so she can enjoy the next stage of her life.”
“That sounds like some hokey shit Kat would say.”
“Maybe so, but think about it. All she did in the Green Zone? The way she focused on Lucky Lopez, making sure everything was just right? She’s ready for what comes next. There’s Ava Rose, and soon Kat and Maisie will start to have babies. You know your mother. Her focus will be on protecting her grandchildren, the next generation. She can’t do that now.”
We stepped off the elevator at the same time, Thomas still talking shit as if he could stop what was about to happen. We walked up to the nursing station, and I leaned over the counter and snapped at the young woman sitting at a computer.
“Dr. Purcell, where the fuck is he?”
The nurse blinked, terrified when her brown eyes landed on my gun.
“Sir, I’m going to have to call security. You’re not allowed…”
“This hospital has my name on the front of it. Call Dr. Fucking Purcell now or your job is toast. Ma’am.”
The nurse paled and looked to Thomas, who nodded, and she took that to mean she should get on it. “Uhm, yes, sir. I’ll page him now.”
“Tell him to meet me in Sadie Ashby’s room. Now.”
She scurried off, leaving me and Thomas to go in the other direction toward the room that looked like it might become Sadie’s tomb.
“Don’t do anything that will take you away from this family right now, Jasper. They all need you.”
“Goddammit, Thomas, this is my mother.”
“And the woman I’ve loved since before you were born. I know. If I could shake her awake, I would.”
The door opened, and the brown-haired man with a stethoscope around his neck strolled in. “I’m Dr. Purcell and—”
I raised the gun so he didn’t have to look down at it, so he was looking right at me as I made my request. “And you’re the man who’s going to wake my mother up.”
The doctor froze just inside the door, his pleading gaze bouncing between the gun and Thomas. “That’s not a good idea.”
“Do it,” I growled. “You want to pull the plug on my mother, prove to me she’s beyond help.”
Purcell shook his head. “I didn’t say that. I’m just giving your family the options.”
His hands trembled, but incredibly, he turned to me with steel in his eyes. “Sadie needs to wake up on her own. The fact that she hasn’t means she isn’t ready to, for whatever reason. All we can do is monitor her and keep her comfortable, Mr. Ashby.”
“Wake. Her. Up. Now.” I adjusted my grip and took a step forward to press the cold metal against his flesh. “Now, goddammit!”
“Mr. Ashby—”
“Now. You medically induced her, so that means you can wake her up. Do it.” I pressed the gun against his head harder and harder until he tried to crouch away from it.
“I can’t.” Purcell stood tall and smoothed the sides of his white coat. “She hasn’t had any meds for a while now. Ms. Ashby has to wake up on her own. If you’re going to shoot me for that, then shoot me. This is ridiculous.”
“Stop wasting my fucking time, Doc.”
“Stop wasting mine! I’m doing my job,” he growled back. “You have a gun to my head, so I want, need you to manage your expectations.”
“Consider them managed.” My jaw clenched, and I nodded for him to get out. “Get out of here. I’ll do it myself.”
Thomas and I sat for hours. I prayed, begged her, willed her to open her eyes. Hours passed. Then I realized the doctor was right. Sitting here with a gun in my hand wasn’t going to make Sadie wake up. And in a flash of insight, something in me surrendered to that truth. This was Sadie’s fight and I had to wait until she was ready.
But as much as I knew I couldn’t bend Sadie to my will, I also knew I couldn’t leave her alone that day. I had to stay with her and wait for her to let me know she was ready. And I’d wait in that hospital room with her until hell froze over if that was what it took.
It was the longest goddamn wait of my life, but suddenly, hours after I’d stormed into the hospital, gun blazing with Thomas at my side, humbled now by a power I couldn’t control, Sadie’s eyelids began to open. Her fingers twitched. That was the only movement for another few minutes.
“Come on, Ma.” She was so close, I could tell. “Just wake up,” I whispered.
Thomas went to her side, and I stayed where I was, worried she wouldn’t wake up. Worried she wouldn’t be able to speak, or worse, she would have no memories of any of us.
“Come on, babe. Open up those pretty green eyes for me. We’ve all been waiting.”
She blinked, and finally, her eyes were open. Wide open and clear. Recognition dawned at the sight of Thomas, and she smiled. My heart leaped into my throat. Sadie was back. Thomas held her hand to his face and closed his eyes.
“Tommy,” she whispered in a voice haggard from illness and disuse. Cillian says hi.”
He laughed and turned into her hand, kissing her palm. “Glad to see you, babe.”
“Ma.” I got up and took a step forward but stopped abruptly when her gaze landed on me and turned to a scowl.
“Colm. You bastard!” She growled, and her eyes fluttered shut.
“What the fuck just happened?” I grunted and turned on my heels, getting away from the fucking hospital as fast as I could.
Colm. She looked at me and saw that fucking monster? She was delirious.
And I worried she’d never wake up again. Ever.
My phone pinged at an ungodly hour. Of course, it was Thomas. Who else gets up at the crack of dawn?
“What?” I growled, needing to take care of my morning wood.
“Thought you’d like a report on Beck’s raid last night.”
I could tell from the tone in his voice, it was Lucky Lopez 1, Beck 0.
“Tell me,” I said, hunching up against the upholstered headboard of my bed. “But first, did Sadie wake up again after I left the hospital?”
His long awkward silence gave me the answer, but he said, no, anyway. “But that’s not why I’m calling. Our place was clean as a kindergarten bake sale when Beck’s feds came in, flashing their badges and guns. They didn’t find a dancer under twenty-five years of age.”
I snorted. “You brought out the old ladies. What about the college girls? They all legit?”
“Yes, they are. Twenty-one and up. I checked them out myself. Ellison’s spot on this time.”
“So Beck didn’t show up herself?”
“Nope,” Thomas said with a chuckle. “I guess she wanted it to seem like a regular raid, not harassment. You’ll have to see if she brings it up.”
”Will do.” I cut off the call and walked into the shower a happy man for a change. Fat chance Beck would mention that she’d been bested by Lucky Lopez’s close attention to federal laws.
Chapter Twenty
Mo
“The nausea is normal, Maureen. Perfectly normal.” The doctor’s kind smile did nothing to ease my worries. “You’re nearly sixteen weeks, so it should get better, if not disappear altogether. If it worsens, come back.”
I nodded, happy to hear that everything was normal as far as pregnancies went. “And the baby is okay?”
He nodded. “Growing exactly as expected. Your baby’s development is where it should be. On your next visit, we might get to find out the gender if the little one cooperates.” He pointed to the screen where the little ball was faced away from us.
“Sounds good.” It hardly seemed soon enough to know if I was having a boy or a girl. How was the pregnancy moving along so fast?
“I take it that means you’ve decided to continue the pregnancy?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“You don’t sound sure.”
“I am sure. Absolutely.” I always wanted a child but I always thought I’d find a decent man first, one who wanted me, who thought I was great enough to marry, not just fuck.
“Plans never work out how you think, Doctor. I’m surprised and scrambling to catch up, but I’m sure.”
“That’s good news. I’m happy for you, Maureen.”
“Thanks.” I was happy for me, too, and it didn’t matter if Jasper believed me or if he was happy about it. I could support a child on my own, raise it on my own. It wasn’t how I pictured it, but few things in life were.
After leaving the doctor’s office, I sent a quick text to let Jasper know I wouldn’t be coming in today. I needed to take some time for myself, time to tend to my health and well-being. I needed some me-time and some distance from Jasper, which is why I didn’t call Hulu to let him know my schedule for the day.
I ran errands and let my thoughts race, my mind wander while I did mundane tasks that no one was immune from. Might as well get used to it, I told myself as I filled a shopping cart with groceries. A mother couldn’t order food out every night and set a good example, could she?
After I paid at the check-out counter–memo to self, save your overtime for feeding your baby–I refilled my prenatal prescription at the pharmacy and picked up something the doctor promised would help with the nausea. Suddenly, I felt like those soccer moms I saw in the burbs of Vegas and all around Glitz, looking fabulous and running errands.
Yes! I can do this!
If I wasn’t dead on my feet, I might have stopped at Versace for another little black dress because let’s face it, a girl could never have too many LBD’s, even if I wouldn’t be able to wear it for a while. But Versace would have to wait, at least until after I had a nap.