by Susan Stoker
Taking a deep breath, Aleck turned toward her. “No,” he said. “I have to go.”
“Go?” she asked.
Shit, he was fucking this up. He couldn’t just leave. He needed to reassure her. Explain. Something. He strode across the room and pulled Kenna close. He put his hands on either side of her neck and held her gently as he said, “The team’s been called in. We’re heading out on a mission.”
“Now?” Kenna asked in disbelief as she grabbed hold of his wrists.
“Unfortunately, yeah.”
“Well…shit. What can I do to help you?”
That so wasn’t the reaction Aleck had expected. “You aren’t upset?”
“Of course I’m upset,” Kenna said. “But being pissed, or sad, or hysterical isn’t going to help you or change the situation. I’m disappointed that I don’t get to jump your bones tonight, but you’re going to come home safe and sound, then we’ll have something to really celebrate.” Her voice wobbled a bit at the end, but she took a deep breath and got herself under control.
“Fuck, you’re amazing.”
“I’m not,” she countered. “I’m scared to death on your behalf, but this is what you do. What you love.”
The first thing that sprang to his mind was that he loved her, but he kept that to himself. Because that was crazy…wasn’t it?
“So…what do you need me to do to help you?” she repeated.
Taking another deep breath, Aleck forced himself to start getting into SEAL mode. “Can you put the dishes away while I pack?”
“Of course.”
“Just throw everything in the dishwasher. Once they wash, they’ll be fine in there until I get back. And please take the leftovers with you.”
“Okay, no problem.”
“I can run you back to your place before heading to the base,” Aleck said.
“No way. That’s completely out of your way. I can take a taxi or an Uber.”
Aleck frowned. “It’s late.”
“Not that late,” Kenna said.
“Would you consider staying here for the night and heading to your apartment in the morning?” Aleck asked tentatively. He dropped his hands to her waist and held her in a loose embrace.
She was quiet for a moment before asking, “You wouldn’t mind me being here without you?”
“No, of course not. In fact, come over whenever you want. Maybe on days you don’t have to work the next day. You’re on my list of approved visitors so it won’t be an issue. You can get in because I programmed your palm print into the reader. And,” he added as he thought of something, “if you want to invite Lexie and Elodie over and have a girls’ night, feel free. They’ll probably be down because Midas and Mustang are gone too.”
“Wow, um, okay. Maybe.”
He smiled at her.
“But I’m sure I’ll be fine going home tonight.”
“Stay,” he cajoled. “I might not be able to join you in my bed, but I love the thought of you being there.”
“Well, shit. How can I say no to that?” she teased.
“You can’t.”
“Okay. I’ll stay.”
“Good. I’ll get the bags with the stuff you picked up this morning at the swap meet from the car, and give them to Robert or whoever is on duty to store for you until tomorrow. I’ll also arrange for a taxi for you.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“Yes, I do.” They stared at each other for a moment before Aleck pulled her closer. “Come ’ere,” he said gently.
Kenna snuggled into his embrace. They both sighed.
Aleck hated that this was how their night was ending. Not because he wouldn’t get the chance to go to bed with her, but because he could tell she was now stressed and sad.
“I’ll be back before you know it.”
“I know. Marshall?”
“Yeah?”
“I know your job is dangerous, and your team is one of the best, but…” Her voice trailed off.
She didn’t need to continue. Aleck was pretty sure he knew what she was going to say. “We’re good at what we do. We’re coming back,” he told her. He really shouldn’t promise anything of the sort, but there was no way he could just stand there and not reassure her.
Kenna nodded against him. He felt her take a deep breath before she pulled back. Tears shone in her eyes, but she blinked them away. “Right. So…you need to get packed so you can go kick some ass.”
Fuck, this woman killed him. “I’m gonna miss you. I think we’ve talked and texted every day since you jumped on my head.”
“I didn’t jump on your head,” she protested automatically, as she always did. “And yeah, I think we have. I’ll miss you too. But you need to go and do your thing.”
Aleck nodded.
Kenna gave him a little push. “Go. I’ll clean up our dinner stuff.”
Reluctantly, knowing he really did need to get moving, Aleck headed for his bedroom. By the time he’d packed, Kenna had filled the dishwasher and put away the leftovers. She was standing on his balcony looking out at the ocean when he returned to the living area with his duffle bag and wearing his camouflage uniform.
She obviously heard him and turned. She gave him a wobbly smile and walked toward him. “I don’t know how much this place costs, but that balcony makes it worth every penny.”
Aleck knew she wasn’t fishing to find out how much the condo was worth. She was making small talk to try to make his leaving easier. He met her halfway across the room and cradled her nape in his hand, his other arm sliding around her back. It felt natural now to hold her like this. “I’m coming back,” he said gruffly. “There’s no way I’m fucking dying before I taste your pussy. Before I get inside you.”
She choked out a laugh. “Okay. Good. Because I haven’t gotten to suck you off either,” she returned.
Aleck lowered his mouth and kissed her long, hard, and deep. He was only torturing them both, but he couldn’t seem to stop. He’d always assumed that deployments were harder on the ones left behind. Mustang and Midas always talked about how difficult they were for their women. But he hadn’t realized how tough it would be for him to leave her behind.
When he finally pulled back, they were both breathing hard. Kenna’s fingers were digging into his chest and as he stared into her eyes, a tear finally broke free and fell down her cheek. She immediately used her shoulder to wipe it away.
“I’m fine,” she said almost defiantly.
“I know you are,” Aleck said gently, then kissed her forehead. “Stay here,” he said. “You don’t need to walk me down.”
She shook her head. “No, I want to—”
“It’s hard enough for me to leave you,” Aleck interrupted. “I’d like my last sight of you for a while to be here. In my space.”
Kenna took a deep breath. “Okay,” she said, giving in immediately.
He stared at her for a long moment before swallowing hard and backing away. He needed to just leave already. Staying here looking at her longingly wouldn’t make his departure any easier. “Like a bandage,” he muttered.
“Get it over with fast,” Kenna agreed, on the same wavelength as him, as usual.
Aleck backed away, not taking his gaze from hers until he almost tripped over his duffle bag.
Kenna giggled, and Aleck knew the sound would stay with him the entire time he was gone. He smiled and winked at her, picked up his bag, then backed toward the door. He opened it and gave Kenna a chin lift, then turned, exited his condo, and shut the door behind him.
Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to walk down the hall toward the elevator. This sucked.
This sucks, Kenna thought to herself as she stood in the middle of Marshall’s empty condo. She wanted to run after him and tell him not to go. But he had to. It was what he did. Who he was. She’d so wanted to ask where he was going and if it would be dangerous, but of course it would be. He was a SEAL, for God’s sake.
Sighing, she headed into the bedroom and got ready fo
r bed. It was early, and she’d planned on doing something much more exciting tonight, but perhaps it was for the best. She and Marshall had been moving really fast. Maybe some time away from each other would be a good thing.
She headed over to the panel on the wall to black out the windows, then hesitated. Why should she? The windows faced the ocean, and the sun rose on the other side of the island, so she wouldn’t be blinded by it in the morning. In fact…
She pushed a button that opened one of the windows a couple of inches, letting in the breeze. The opening was a portion of the window near the ceiling, so no one could accidentally fall out. She couldn’t quite hear the ocean, but the fresh air felt great.
She backed away from the wall of windows and fell onto Marshall’s bed. Immediately she was surrounded by his scent. She had no idea how to describe it, but knew she’d never forget it. She pulled one of his pillows into her arms and buried her face against the softness, inhaling deeply.
Then she cried.
Cried because she was disappointed that Marshall wasn’t fucking her brains out right this second.
Cried because she was scared to death for him.
Cried because she already missed him and he wasn’t even off the island yet.
It had been a long time since she’d bawled that hard, but by the time she got herself under control, she felt a little better.
Marshall would be back; she refused to believe otherwise. In the meantime, she had friends and her job to keep her busy.
She fell asleep in Marshall’s big bed and dreamed about him all night.
Kenna woke up feeling slightly sad, but not quite as scared as she’d been the night before. She took a shower in Marshall’s amazing bathroom and decided that even though it might feel weird, she was totally going to hang out here whenever she could while Marshall was gone. The heated tiles under her bare feet and the warm towel from the heated rack were decadent luxuries, and she had a feeling her own shower would feel totally inadequate now.
But more importantly, being in his space, surrounded by his things, made her feel as if he was still with her.
She rummaged in the fridge for some breakfast and ate out on the balcony, enjoying the view once more. It was around eleven o’clock before Kenna decided she had to get going. She had to work in a few hours and needed to stop at the store on her way home for her weekly groceries.
She packed her things and found a reusable grocery bag she could use to carry the leftovers from last night. Putting the containers in the bag made her relive yesterday all over again, how great it had been…before he’d left, of course. Kenna loved cooking with Marshall. And the fact that he’d wanted to go out of his way to make something special for her put a smile on her face.
She made sure the windows were all closed, the bed was made, her towel was hung up, and the balcony doors were closed and locked, then she picked up her bags and made her way to the door. She looked back before leaving and sighed. She’d been a bitch about the people who lived at Coral Springs, and had judged them unfairly. It was clear it wasn’t cheap to live here, but she had to admit, Marshall’s condo had totally spoiled her. She was officially a fan.
Taking a deep breath, she closed the door and heard it latch behind her. Just to test it out, she put her hand on the reader next to the door. It immediately opened. Kenna smiled and pulled the door shut once more.
She was still smiling as she headed down the elevator and into the lobby. She walked toward Robert, who was sitting at the security desk once more. She assumed he hadn’t been there all night.
“Good morning,” she said cheerily.
“Ms. Madigan, good morning,” he returned as he reached for an electronic device on top of the desk and pushed some buttons.
Kenna had no idea what it was, but supposed it didn’t really matter. “I guess you work days?” she asked.
“Right now, yes. I heard Mr. Smart headed out last night for a while,” Robert said.
Kenna wrinkled her nose and nodded.
“On behalf of myself and the entire staff here at Coral Springs, we appreciate his service to our country, and if there’s anything you need, anything at all, just say the word and we’ll do our best to accommodate you.”
Kenna blinked in surprise. “Um…thanks. I’m not staying here while Marshall’s gone. But I might come by a time or two. If that’s okay.”
“Of course,” Robert told her with a smile.
“Cool. Um, can I get you to call me a taxi?”
“Already done. Mr. Smart requested one for you last night. He wasn’t sure when you’d be ready to go, but I’ve already called one for you.”
“Oh, wow, thanks,” Kenna said, realizing just how valuable Robert and the other staff members could be. She didn’t mind waiting around or being inconvenienced every now and then, but she could certainly get used to being spoiled by the staff at Coral Springs. Her irritation over learning Marshall had money now caused a flicker of guilt, since she was reaping the benefits.
“Also, Alfonso will be right out with your other things.”
“Oh, that’s right. I forgot,” Kenna said, figuring maybe that’s what Robert had been doing on the electronic pad, sending a message to his coworker to bring the stuff she’d gotten at the swap meet yesterday from wherever they’d been stored.
“Understandable. You had other things on your mind,” Robert said.
Kenna bit her lip, then blurted, “I feel like I should apologize to you.”
Robert looked confused.
“I just…before I knew Marshall actually lived here, and in the penthouse no less, I judged the residents pretty harshly. In my mind, they were stuck-up snobs who sat around in their expensive condos and counted their money.”
Robert chuckled.
Kenna continued. “But now that I’ve spent a little bit of time here, and met some of the residents and employees, I realize how unfair I was. So…I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to apologize for,” Robert told her. “When I first contemplated applying to work here, I thought the same thing. But in the last year or so that I’ve been here, I’ve found the residents are just like everyone else. Some are rude and demanding, some are generous and friendly to everyone they meet. Money doesn’t seem to make much of a difference, at least in my experience.”
“Mine too,” Kenna agreed. “And I shouldn’t judge people based on someone’s bank account. I work at Duke’s in Waikiki, and I’ve seen the good and bad in countless people, just like you have. And some of the nicest customers I’ve had were wealthy enough to leave me huge tips. So I should’ve known better.”
“That’s why you look so familiar,” Robert said with a smile. “I go to Duke’s all the time. I must’ve seen you there before. Their hula pie is my weakness.”
“It’s everyone’s weakness,” Kenna agreed, feeling better now that she’d apologized.
“Here’s Alfonso with your things. Go ahead and leave your other bags, he’ll get them.”
“Good morning, ma’am,” Alfonso said as he stopped next to her.
“Morning. You don’t have to carry all my crap. I’ve got it.”
“How about if I grab the bigger bag and you carry the smaller one?” Alfonso offered.
Here was another person who was being extremely nice. Kenna knew it was his job, and he probably got paid very well to be helpful and accommodating, but still. “Sounds good,” she said, giving in.
“There’s your taxi now,” Robert said. “And it’s already been paid for, so if the driver tries to get you to pay a second time, don’t. Also, if that happens, let me know the next time you’re here and we’ll mark them off our list of taxi services to use.”
“Wow, you’d do that?” she asked.
“Absolutely,” Robert said, his voice stern. “Anyway, be safe, Ms. Madigan. Until we meet again.”
“Thanks. And I don’t know when I’ll be back…do I need to call first?” she asked, not completely sure of the rules. Which reminded her she
still needed to read the paper Robert had given her yesterday and sign it. It had slipped her mind until right this moment.
“No. You can come and go as you please.”
“Oh, and if I want to bring some friends with me sometime, that’s okay, right? It’s a couple women Marshall knows, of course. I’m not planning on having a wild and crazy party,” she said quickly, not wanting either man to think she was taking advantage of Marshall being gone.
“It’s no problem. Are you talking about Ms. Winters and Ms. Greene?”
“Um…I don’t know their last names. Elodie and Lexie.”
“That’s them. Mr. Smart said something about that last night. It’s no problem. They just need to stop by the desk and check in before they head upstairs,” Robert told her.
“Okay. Thanks.” She had another thought. “And if two other friends come too…is that all right?”
“Of course. Again, they’ll just need to stop here and check in before they’ll be allowed onto the property.”
“Great. Thanks!” Kenna wasn’t sure if a girls’ night would actually happen or not, but if it did, she figured Carly and Ashlyn might want to come too. She had a feeling if it was just her, Elodie, and Lexie, they might get too sad about the guys being gone, so adding in the other two would be a good balance, help them focus on something other than how worried they were for their men.
“See you later, Robert. Have a good day.”
“You too, Ms. Madigan.”
Kenna smiled at him and headed out of the lobby, with Alfonso holding the door for her. He opened the door to the backseat of the taxi and, once Kenna was seated, closed it and headed for the trunk to store her bags.
The ride to her apartment was uneventful, and Kenna was pleased when the taxi driver helped carry her things up to her place. As soon as her door closed behind her, Kenna’s gaze went to the large beanbag in her living room, and she sighed. She had a hunch she’d see and hear things that reminded her of Marshall all the time while he was gone.
Taking a deep breath, she carried her overnight bag into her room to unpack. With that done, she put the leftovers in her fridge and put away the things she’d picked up at the swap meet. Finally, she sat down to make a list for the grocery store.