Immoral Confessions: A Dark High School Bully Romance

by R Holmes

  When she finishes her speech, I’m still stunned upon hearing Rhys Blackwood is in line for Valedictorian. I guess I just assumed he was absolutely ignorant by his lack of manners and behavior. Of all the rumors I’d heard of Rhys, St. Augustine’s fallen angel, being intelligent wasn’t one of them.

  After our conversation, I leave the classroom astounded by Sister Camille’s proclamation. I make it to my locker and put everything inside in preparation for PE, but I’m still lost in thought. Senior year is going to be nothing like what I expected, and now suddenly my dreams of getting into Harvard seem even further away. I walked into class today completely confident. I took summer classes, I volunteered at the soup kitchen all summer, I worked in the library in the evenings, all to put on my application to Harvard. And now, my future rests in the hands of the one person who could ruin it. I’d rather do the entire thing myself and submit it with his name. Anything other than working with him.

  One thing is for certain. I wish I had never been in the library that night. I wish I never crossed paths with Rhys Blackwood to begin with.

  Watching her cheeks flush with anger, and the fire behind her eyes when I embarrassed her is something I want to replay over and over in my head on a constant loop. It still won’t be enough to quell the anger raging inside me, but it makes me feel better knowing I’m the one to cause her hurt.

  I didn't want to just hurt her, I wanted to ruin her for what she'd done. I want to break her apart, piece by piece until there’s nothing left.

  I will ruin her.

  “Wow, little Valentina is a bit of a closet freak,” Sebastian laughs, leaning against my locker once the bell dismissing class for the day had rung.

  I cut my eyes to him and he shrugs.

  “She’s going to pay for what she did, Sebastian. This isn’t a fucking joke.” My jaw clenches until I feel an ache. I slam the locker door shut and turn to face Sebastian and Alec.

  “No, but it can be a game. One we can all partake in. You know how much we like to play with our toys before we break them.”

  “How about we start by getting her alone, and we go from there? We have to get Sister Camille out of detention. I don't care how you do it, but get it done. Something to get her out of the room for at least fifteen minutes. I need to be alone with Valentina Carmichael." Alec finally looks up from his phone and nods. He’s been so far away since the shit went down.

  I make a mental note to talk with him alone, soon. Before we have a bigger situation on our hands.

  "I have the perfect fucking idea," Sebastian says excitedly.

  "Don't get caught. There’s too much at stake as it is." I clench my jaw when I think of where Ezra is right now and how helpless I feel at not being able to fix it.

  “I got this, bro, trust me.” And I do. If there’s anyone I trust, it’s my brothers.

  A few minutes later, I'm sitting behind the heavy wooden desk in the library, twirling my pencil through my fingers, when Valentina stomps through the door. The second her stormy eyes meet mine, they harden and she scowls angrily.

  She takes her place as far away from me as she possibly can, then slams her book bag down on the table. She’s mad after I embarrassed her in class and put us in detention.

  Good.

  The library is a large, towering stone structure that sits directly behind the main building where classes are held. There are floor-to-ceiling cathedral style windows of stained glass, and everything is old. Including the musty smell of aged books and their years of use. It's also my favorite place on campus. It’s the only place I don’t hear my demons the second I walk over the threshold.

  Ironically, it isn’t the chapel next door that offers any reprieve and it never has been. Church has never saved me from the demons who have taken me wholly since I was a child. I knew better than to turn to God to save me. I had to save myself.

  Sister Camille walks through the door a minute later and greets us both, looking down her nose in disapproval.

  Good thing I don't give a fuck.

  "For today's detention, you will be dusting and re-shelving all of the returned books for Sister Rose. I expect this section done by the end of your hour here. No talking, no cell phone usage, and no leaving until your detention hour is up. If you need me, I'll be over here at the desk grading papers."

  She sits down at the desk opposite of us and pulls a large stack of papers from her bag, along with a red pen, and purses her lips in a firm frown. It seems to never leave her face.

  I don't wait for further instruction and walk over to the bin of returned books, picking up a few and shelving them. Valentina does her best to stay as far from me as possible, busying herself with our task, but I catch the way her eyes follow me as I walk to and from the bin, then back over to the massive shelves.

  There’s a tense, uncomfortable feeling in the air each second spent in her presence, and it only grows.

  Like she, too, can feel the ominous tone in the room.

  Oh, but you have no idea, little lamb.

  A few minutes later, Father William bursts through the doors, almost tripping on his way over the threshold, into the library.

  “Sister Camille, I need you in the girls’ dormitories now, please. There’s been an uh… Incident that needs your immediate attention,” he squeaks. The white collar around his neck is too tight around his pudgy neck and his entire face is beet red.

  Perfect timing.

  Valentina’s eyes dart over and catch mine, widening in fear when Sister Camille runs from the library after Father William, leaving us completely alone.

  She knows the last place she needs to be is alone with me. That makes her drop the book she was just clutching, and she turns to run, but I’m quicker. I’m after her before they’ve even stepped over the threshold.

  I catch her arm in a firm grip and spin her around until her back hits the shelf behind her roughly, and she cries out in pain.

  It’s like music to my fucking ears.

  “You can run, Valentina, but I’ll always catch you. I’ll always be one step ahead.” I place my hands on each side of her head, boxing her in against the bookshelves. I step closer until I’m pressed tightly against her, pinning her to the shelf behind her.

  No running. Not now, not ever.

  “Let me go! Why are you so obsessed with messing with me?” I see the fire flare behind her eyes, and instead of showing how afraid of me she is, she tries to put on this brave front.

  But the way she’s trembling shows me she’s fucking terrified of me.

  “Don’t flatter yourself.” I curl my lip in disgust, yet still drag my eyes down her body. Her chest heaves, and I know if I were to put my hand over her heart, it would pound wildly. Frantically. I rub my finger along the soft piece of flesh that peeks out between her button-down, and drag it lower, and lower, over the buttons of her uniform, her pleated skirt, to the top of her thigh-high socks, and I hear a sharp intake of breath.

  “What I wanted from you, Valentina Carmichael, was for you to keep your fucking mouth shut. Isn’t it a bit ironic, here we are again, all alone in the very place that sealed your fate only days ago?”

  I skim my fingers back up the inside of her thigh until I feel her shudder beneath my touch. My eyes meet hers, and she holds my gaze steadily.

  “You’re delusional. I haven’t said anything to anyone,” she scoffs, never breaking our stare.

  “Ah, I told you how much I hate liars, little lamb. And you? Not only are you a liar, you’re a snitch. And there’s nothing I hate more than a snitch.”

  “I’m not a liar! I haven’t done anything, in case you forgot, I’m here because of you!” She places her hand on my chest to push me away, but I grab her wrist and squeeze tightly, until she gives me the sweet sound of her pain once again.

  “You should be terrified, Valentina, because what I have planned for you will ruin you.”

  “I dare you.”

  Three simple words. Three words that change everything. If I hat
ed her before, I loathe her now. She has the audacity to act innocent, like the punishment doesn’t fit the crime. She’s a snitch, a fucking liar, and I will do everything in my power to be her downfall.

  The sound of the door slamming behind us and footsteps cause me to look up, to see Sebastian and Alec walking toward us. They’re both dressed in their hockey hoodies and sweatpants, obviously coming from whatever stunt they pulled to get us here with her alone.

  “Wow, this is perfect. Carmichael has a thing for more than one guy railing her, and here we are… all alone in this library with no one around to save you.” Alec grins sinisterly.

  Valentina stills against the shelf.

  “Fuck off, Alec,” she spits.

  “Watch it, I like when they fight back. Makes my dick hard.” He winks at her and grabs his junk suggestively. She scoffs in disgust. He and Sebastian both lean against the heavy wooden library tables, and watch as I bring my hand back to the thigh-highs she’s wearing.

  Not many people know my brothers the way I do, and no one knows how much they both enjoy to watch.

  She immediately tries to push me backward off of her and I grasp both of her wrists, putting them together above her head while she thrashes wildly against my hold. Now I have her exactly where I want her, and her feisty side shows. No longer is she quiet and mousy, she’s bold and confident. My leg is planted firmly between hers, holding her legs open.

  “You’re not fucking touching me, Rhys, get off!”

  “Seems like it’s up to me, isn’t it? Those choices are no longer yours, little lamb. I fucking own you.” I lean closer, skimming my nose along her jaw ever so slightly, and she recoils away from my touch.

  “You know, I never knew a girl like you, all high and mighty, an untouchable little goody two-shoes virgin, would be into more than one guy at a time… but, hey, we all like what we like. We’re all a little fucked-up,” I whisper in her ear.

  She continues to fight against my hold, but I want more. I want her to be fucking terrified of me. Cowering in fear. I want her to be sorry she ever fucked with me. That she ever opened her goddamn mouth to snitch.

  That’s the thing about desperation, when a man has nothing to lose, it makes him the most dangerous person you could ever cross.

  And now? All because of Valentina Carmichael, I have nothing to lose. The walls were closing in around us, and there is nothing I can do to stop it, because she stole our secret. She opened her fucking mouth and told what she was never meant to hear. She fucked with my family.

  I use one hand to hold both of her wrists, and continue my path upward, under the hem of her uniform skirt. I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t surprise me that she even bothers fighting back. It makes my dick hard to see her thrash and try to fight me.

  “Don’t do this, Rhys. I know you’re pissed, and this is how you want to get back at me, but don’t do this,” she says. “I didn’t do whatever you think I did. Please, just let me go.” The unshed tears in her eyes threaten to spill over, and when they do, I lean in closer and lick her cheek, capturing her tears on my tongue.

  A small whimper leaves her lips.

  “I bet if I dip my fingers in the lace of these,” I pause as my fingers skim across the lace of her panties, feeling her heat. “That you’d be fucking dripping.”

  She whimpers, and tries to break free from my grasp. She can say whatever the fuck she wants, but she wants this. I can tell by the flush in her cheeks, the small pants that leave her lips the closer I get to touching her pussy.

  “You’re a fucking liar, little lamb. And I hate you for it.”

  I move her panties aside and drag my fingers across her pussy, grazing her clit lightly.

  “I don’t hear your protests, Valentina. Tell me to stop.” I whisper against the sensitive skin of her neck. “Tell me you don’t like to have your pussy touched by a man who loathes everything about you.”

  I rub a quick circle around her clit and she melts against my hold. Whether she means to or not, she can’t help her body's reaction to me.

  “Tell me you didn’t like how I fucking took this and I didn’t ask what you wanted.” I continue rubbing her clit in quick, brutal circles, until I stop and drag my finger down to her entrance. I know if I push inside she’ll be impossibly tight, and so fucking warm. My fingers pinch around her clit roughly, and her body jerks in pain. This isn’t about her pleasure.

  “Please don't do this. There’s no coming back from this. Let me go and I’ll never say anything, I’ll never tell anyone, I swear,” she pleads.

  “Like you kept your mouth shut the last time you swore you would?” I scoff. “Should I take this from you? Like you fucking took from me?”

  She lets out a soft whimper but doesn’t answer my question, only turning her head to the side to avoid my gaze. Instead, her eyes lock with Sebastian’s, and he looks ready to pounce. An irrational sense of jealousy courses through my body when their eyes remain locked.

  “Look at me.” I raise my voice and she jumps.

  Her piercing eyes meet mine, and I see arousal. I see the flush of her cheeks, the way her chest heaves up and down. The tears on her cheeks. Her salty tears only spur me on.

  The good girl wants to be tarnished by the fallen angel.

  She can waste her time with wicked lies, but the way her pussy is slick and dripping around my fingers is the only confirmation I need to know that if I fucked her right here, right now, she’d welcome me inside her greedy little pussy.

  “You don’t get what you want, Valentina. You get what the fuck I give you, and you’ll never have the pleasure of coming by my hand. From this moment forward, I own you. Every single fucking part of you until your debt is paid. You may not know what I’m capable of, but you will. You’ll pay for what you’ve done. I will fucking ruin you.”

  I pull my fingers from her underwear and bring them to her mouth, pushing past her lips. Her head thrashes as she tries to free herself from my hold, but I push my fingers farther down her throat until she gags. Further and further as the tears pour from her cheeks each time she gags around my fingers.

  Fuck, it’s sweet.

  “Taste yourself, Valentina. I bet your pussy tastes forbidden and sweet. Doesn’t it?” I pull my fingers from her mouth and wipe them on my pant leg. “Get out of my sight, I don’t even want to fucking look at you.”

  Her mascara-stained cheeks are bright red from embarrassment, yet she shoots me a look that could kill me dead and pushes me off her roughly. A small sob escapes as she rushes from the library.

  I don’t fucking care.

  I hear Sebastian and Alec laugh behind me, and after the moment we just had, I almost forgot we had an audience. Sebastian pockets his phone and gives me a brief nod.

  “See, I knew she liked the threesome shit. It’s always the quiet ones who are freaky.” Alec laughs and she darts past him, grabbing her bag and running from the library.

  “Holy fuck, dude, that was unexpectedly hot,” Sebastian says. I grab my backpack, ignoring him, and together, we leave the library, heading back to the dorms.

  “I dare you.” Plays on repeat over and over in my mind and I know no matter what it takes, no matter how far I have to go, I will be Valentina Carmichael’s demise.

  Anger like I’ve never known consumes me, wholly, as I slam the door to my dorm closed and fall against it. I slide down until I hit the ground and let the tears fall freely.

  Who the fuck does he think he is?

  He’s deranged. Completely fucked-up.

  I ran out of the library completely ashamed I allowed him in any way to touch me. I should’ve fought back harder, I should have screamed for help, but I was weak. My tears are a mixture of embarrassment, anger, and lust I shouldn’t feel, and it makes me feel even more fucked-up.

  He preyed on me because of who he is. That’s what guys like Rhys Blackwood do. They find the weakest link and they break them down until there isn’t anything left. I know who he is, I’ve been controlled
by someone like this my entire life. A narcissistic psychotic crazy person. Except she controls me by breaking down my self-perception and he uses my body as a weapon.

  I wipe the wetness from my cheeks, and take a moment to suck in a deep, calming breath before I pick my phone up and text my best and only friend, Rory.

  Valentina: Ror, I need you.

  A minute later, the three blinking dots dance along my screen, showing he’s responding.

  Rory: Be there soon, babe x

  I pull myself up off of the floor and discard my uniform, anxious to remove the reminder of what just happened. Turning the water on in the shower as hot as I can stand it, I step under the blistering stream. The water soaks my hair and coats my body, but I still feel his hands on me.

  I still feel the searing heat of his finger as he dipped it inside me. No one has ever touched me there before, and it’s a feeling I want to replay, over and over. That thought alone makes me feel filthy, like no matter how much I scrub, I’ll never wash his sin from my skin. I’ve only been in the presence of St. Augustine’s fallen angel twice, but each time his tainted darkness has touched me, and now I’m singed. On their own accord, my fingers make their way to my pussy and I slide a finger through my folds, fingering the sensitive bud I only hours ago begged him to not touch.

  Maybe I’m just as fucked-up as he is.

  He told me we were all a little fucked-up, and maybe it’s the truth.

  The truth is, as much as I hate Rhys for touching me without my consent, part of me wanted the attention. I wanted someone to look at me and feel desire. Look past the baggy cardigans I hide my body with and want me. Forget the mousy, shy girl I was on the inside and turn me into a wanton, wild person for him.

  I’d never be that girl.

  “Val, you here?” Rory’s deep voice carries into the bathroom, and I immediately drop my hand from myself and grab the shampoo hurriedly before he opens the door.

  “Yeah, be out in just a few,” I tell him and hear the door shut.