by R Holmes
Suspicious.
"Behave," I whisper to him as he sits down beside me.
He grins, but puts his hands up in surrender. Seeing this playful, carefree side of Rhys disarms me. It's not who I know, but I love this version of him just as much as the broody, hard one. Without thinking, I lean over and place a sweet kiss against his lips. In the moment, it feels completely natural. He responds immediately, threading his hands through my hair and pulling me tighter to him. After a few minutes, the lights go low, the screen opens and the previews begin to play, pulling my attention from him.
"Christ, Valentina," he curses, adjusting himself.
I giggle, then bite my lip.
Before we get into trouble, I sit back in my chair and keep my hands to myself, even though it's hard. The way he can't sit still tells me he feels the same. It's torturous having to be this close yet not touch him the way I want. He laces his hand with mine, and let’s it rest on my thigh, behaving for once, even though I’m shocked, and if I’m being honest, turned on beyond belief. That’s what Rhys does to me. Makes me out-of-my-mind crazy with whatever emotion he delivers. The entire movie passes in a blur, and as soon as we're outside, his lips are on mine as he shoves me against the brick wall of the building.
"Fuck, I've been waiting for two hours to do this," he mutters, then proceeds to maul me against the wall until I'm a wet, panting mess of putty in his excellently skilled hands. Things are so different between us, it’s shocking at times but I don’t want to give it up. I selfishly want to keep it all to myself. The entire ride back to campus, his hand rests on my thigh and he rubs small, monotonous circles with his fingers, but each pass of his thumb makes the feeling in my stomach flutter.
"Wanna go with Bash and Alec to the Abbey tonight?"
This is a big step for us. We haven't come out as a couple or whatever it is that we are. Everything that's happened with us has been done in the dark. I'm surprised that he wants to take our relationship public. Shocked, even.
"You know, if we go to that party… the entire school will be talking about it within the first ten minutes, right?"
"Don't give a shit. If we're doing this, we're fucking doing it. Who gives a fuck what anyone else thinks, but us? Right?" he asks.
The old me would worry what everyone would think. Who would talk, what they'd spread around the school about me. But the new Valentina doesn't give one shit, and I'm determined to keep it that way.
"I'm down." I give him a small smile and squeeze the hand that sits on my thigh. We pull into the parking lot of St. Augustine and he parks in the front row, then turns to face me.
I’m nervous to be around Bash and Alec for the first time since… the library. I still haven’t forgiven them for participating in it, but I also know that I have to try to get along with them for Rhys’s sake.
"How about you take a shower, do whatever you girls do with your makeup and shit, and I'll walk over around seven? Gonna talk with Bash and Alec first." He pauses to lean in and give me a chaste kiss before getting out and coming around to open my door.
"Wow, what a gentleman. Might earn you something for later." That earns me a swift smack on the ass.
He drops one last kiss to my lips before leaving to walk to his dorm.
On my way home, I realize that I haven't responded to the text I got earlier from Rory, so I send him a quick text telling him to meet me at my dorm. It's time to come clean to my best friend. I've got knots in my stomach when I think about what his reaction will be, but I can't keep him in the dark any longer. I hated having to lie and sneak around, but he hasn't been around much lately either. I have a feeling it has everything to do with the complicated guy he's been seeing.
When I arrive at my door, I see him casually leaning against it wearing a grin. Looking as handsome as ever in a white tee and a pair of light wash blue jeans.
"Hi, stranger." I grin and pull him into a hug. His arms wrap around my back and he returns the hug.
"I'm sorry, I've just been like all over the place. I have so much to fill you in on," Rory says.
"And me too. I hate when we go longer than a few days without checking in, you know this, sir," I tease.
We walk into my dorm together and he shuts the door, while I turn on the lights and grab a quick change of clothes out of my heels and skirt. Rory sits at my computer, on his phone while he waits. When I walk back out, he's still in the same spot, head bent staring at his phone.
"Ror!" I call his name and he almost jumps out of the chair.
"Jesus, Val, I didn't even hear you walk out."
I laugh. "That's because you're staring at your phone like it's about to come alive and eat you. What is going on?"
He drops his head into his hands and sighs. "I dunno. Things are… complicated. It's not my story to tell, and I hate that I can't tell you more than that because you're my best fucking girl, but I can't, Val. I promised him."
It makes me feel even more guilty for keeping Rhys a secret for so long.
"Listen, Ror, I need to talk to you and I need you to promise that you won't be angry at me." I sit on my bed and pull my legs up to my chest. He eyes me warily before taking a seat at the foot of the bed.
"Okay, I can't promise that, but I promise to listen until you're finished."
"So, basically I'm, like, seeing… Rhys Blackwood," I say all in one breath. The words just tumble out of me, no longer able to hold them in. My heart flutters thinking of the past few days with him, even if the guilt is still ever-present.
His eyes widen in shock. "Wait, what?" The words come out in a screech.
"I know, I know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, it's just… it was complicated." I tell him, using his own words back at him.
"Like, how long has this been going on? I'm so shocked."
I take a deep breath before I begin. I need a second to calm the nerves rumbling in the pit of my stomach. "Almost a month."
His face crumples in hurt, and I immediately feel immensely guilty and sick for hiding something like this from my best friend. Granted, yes, he's currently holding back the entire truth of what's going on with him and a mystery guy. But, at least he told me what was happening and didn't lie to my face. I lied to his face, and I feel like the worst friend on the planet for doing so.
"A month, Val! He bullied you. He hurt you!" he screams. I wince at the octaves of his voice rising.
"You promised to listen, Ror. Just let me explain."
He nods and sits back down across from me.
"Rhys is… intense. He's an enigma. It was never meant to happen, never. But it did. He's the guy I was supposed to hate, but in the end, hate blurred into something different."
Rory watches me intently as I speak, never interrupting, but his face is filled with hurt.
"It started in the library. I overheard something I shouldn't have, and he thought he could bully me into not saying anything. But, along the way, it just turned into something else. It started as something physical, but along the way it turned into something so much more. He did bully me. He did things that he isn’t proud of, but so have I. And I refuse to let anyone dictate how I’m supposed to feel. I feel how I feel. Ror, if anything, he's taught me to stand on my own feet and not back down to anyone. Just in the short time that I've known him, he's changing me."
"I'm not mad at you, Val, I just hate that you kept something monumental from me like this. It hurts my heart. Why wouldn’t you tell me? If he’s that important to you, how could you not tell me about him?"
"I know and I'm sorry. Just like the situation you have that's complicated, this one is too. It's not even, like, official or anything yet. We're kind of just existing. It's all so new. No one knows, but he did invite me tonight to go to the Abbey with him and Sebastian and Alec."
"So, like your official coming out into the world type of thing? Does this make it official official?" His anger seems to have faded into excitement, so on brand for Ror.
"I guess? I don't know hones
tly. I asked him if he was sure that's what he wanted and he said he didn't care what anyone else thought. Wanna come?" I grin.
He raises his eyebrows suggestively and laughs. "Hell yes, I do. I wouldn't miss seeing the look on Mara's face for anything in the world. I love you, Val. You're my best friend. I don't want you to ever think that you can't tell me stuff, but I do respect the fact that it wasn't a secret you could tell. Look at my fucked-up mess."
"I promise I'm done keeping things a secret. Swear. Now, go get dressed and I'll see you back here so you can do this mess of my hair again."
We hug each other tightly before he gives me a small smile and walks out.
Every word of what I've told Rory is true. Rhys came into my life and took it by storm. Now the question is, can I survive the fallout?
"Holy shit," Rhys says when I answer the door. His eyes rake up and down my body once, then twice, and I do a little twirl for good measure. My pants are just the right amount of tight and they hug the curve of my ass perfectly. He reaches out, grabs the back of my neck, and drags me toward him, until his lips seal over mine.
"Goddamn, little lamb, you look incredible. I can't get enough of you," he whispers against the shell of my ear.
"All right, that's enough of that, you two. I don't want to puke before I get my first shot of tequila. And you're making me queasy," a voice says behind Rhys, and I look over his shoulder to see Sebastian, just as he barrels through the door of my dorm, all but knocking us both over.
"Valentina, you've met Sebastian and Alec," Rhys says, gesturing to them with an exaggerated eye roll. Alec follows closely behind him, giving me a small grin, but saying nothing.
Sebastian is everything that Rhys isn't. Where Rhys is dark clothes, old Vans, and hoodies for days. Broody. Moody. Edgy. Sebastian is the all-American boy. Dark hair styled in a messy look that he's perfected. He's got light eyes, angular cheekbones that most girls would die for, and a jaw that should be illegal. He's wearing a pair of jeans and a simple T-shirt, paired with athletic shoes. The complete opposite y of Rhys. It's comical how different they are.
"Unfortunately.” I eye them warily. I feel the familiar spike of shame return at seeing them again, but try my hardest to be cordial for Rhys.
"Awe, Val. Don't worry, I won't tell anybody about that face you make when you come."
I start after him, but Rhys catches me around the waist and holds me back.
"Damn, dude, she's feisty now. Dick must be good." Sebastian grins and plops down on my bed. I was worried they’d embarrass me after what happened, but instead, they act as if it never happened.
"Enough, Bash. Chill the fuck out," Rhys bitches at him.
"God, you fuckers are uptight. Can we go get fucked-up now? Please." He's sprawled out on my bed with his arms behind his head, like he's been here a hundred times before.
Alec is quiet. He just stands off to the side watching as Sebastian and I bicker. He checks his phone a few times, but remains wordless. Alec is the one that I wonder the most about. He, too, is nothing like either of his friends. He's quiet, somewhat shy, a complete mystery. You can't look at him and not know who he is. He's the tallest of the group, with shaggy blond hair that falls in his eyes and is constantly being pushed out of the way, he has the most laidback attitude out of all his friends. It seems like nothing bothers him because nothing matters to him.
"You ready?" Rhys asks, pulling me from my thoughts.
"Yeah, one last look."
I walk over to the mirror and do one last once-over of my outfit—courtesy of Rory, of course. There's nothing more that he loves than picking out what I'm wearing. Tonight's outfit is a pair of tight leather leggings and a white crop top, paired with a black leather jacket. He teased my hair and I put on some of the brightest red lipstick I have. It's nothing like I've ever dared to wear before, but I love it. It's exactly what I've always wanted to wear, but was too afraid to because of what everyone else would think. I completed the outfit with a pair of black combat boots, and I've never felt more beautiful. Being myself, who I truly am, not what everyone believed me to be, is the most empowering feeling there ever was.
"Ready." I grin.
"Finally," Sebastian says dramatically, hopping off of the bed. "Let's go, lovebirds."
"How do you deal with him?" I ask Rhys as he takes my hand and we lock up my door, then follow behind Sebastian and Alec.
"Years of practice."
I stay close to Rhys the entire walk to the Mustang, and I get shotgun, much to Sebastian's dismay. He makes sure to complain about it the entire ride to the party until Rhys threatens to put him out on the side of the road, then he shuts up for five minutes. When we pull up to the party, it's already in full swing and there are tons of people and cars everywhere. My phone buzzes with a text and I see Rory’s name flash across the screen.
Meet up later, something came up. Love you, babe. X
Weird. He’s been so flighty and disappearing so much lately. I know he doesn’t want to talk about his… thing with this guy, but I worry it’s not healthy for him. Rhys opens the door suddenly, pulling me from my thoughts, then holds out his hand to help me out. The second I step out, he yanks me to his body.
"Listen, fuck what anyone has to say, okay?" He drops his forehead to mine, and even in the dim light, I can see the intensity of his gaze.
I give him a small grin to reassure him I'm fine, and then we make our way to the party. Sebastian and Alec left the second we pulled up. Walking up the sidewalk hand in hand, we get a few wide-eyed stares from people we know, but Rhys never falters. It truly doesn't matter to him what anyone else thinks. When we walk through the front door, he's greeted by a few guys from the hockey team he shakes hands with and man-hugs, but then comes right back to me, tucking me into his side.
People are staring like we've grown two heads.
"You okay?" he asks.
"Yep, I'm great. Do you think you could get me a drink?"
"Of course, be right back."
He gives me a peck and leaves to find us drinks. I pull my phone out and fire a text off to Rory, asking where he is. I'm putting my phone back into my jacket pocket when I see Mara walk toward me out of the corner of my eye.
Of course. I wouldn't expect anything less from the queen bee. The second she heard about me and Rhys, I knew she would find a way to get to me. She's spent too long trying to break me down.
"Awe, if it isn't the home-wrecking slut of St. Augustine, Valentina Carmichael. Girls, watch your back, she'll fuck your man the second your back turns," Mara spits as she appears in front of me. She's dressed in a skirt so short, if she bends over she's going to show everyone what's underneath, and a spaghetti strap tank top that reveals her push-up bra and ridiculous cleavage. I've spent so much time hiding from her that I never stopped to realize how sad she actually is. It's like, for the first time, I'm seeing her for who she really is.
A fucking joke.
"You're such a miserable bitch," I tell her.
Her mask of confidence slips momentarily when she realizes that I've actually stood up for myself. She's used to the mousy Valentina. Not the Valentina that has decided to take back her life.
"What did you say, slut?" She steps closer.
"I said you. Are. A. Miserable. Bitch." I enunciate every word slowly so that her tanning bed fried brain can fully comprehend what I'm saying.
"Wow, little Valentina is feeling brave today." She laughs and looks back at her friends. "The thing is, Valentina, while my boyfriend may have fucked you behind my back, he would never give you the time of day if you walked past him."
Is that supposed to offend me? Seeing as how I've never touched her "boyfriend" in any way. By now, we've gained a crowd. People want to see what's going on since Mara practically screamed that last little jab at me. I look around but don't see Rhys anywhere, and that's fine, because I can do this on my own. I don't need him to stand up for me.
"I've told you over and over that I have never even be
en alone with him, and certainly never touched him. You're fucking delusional, Mara."
She steps closer and I smell the overwhelming amount of perfume she's apparently bathed in.
"Watch your back, bitch, you have no idea what I'm capable of."
"I'm terrified, honestly. What's so fucking sad, is that you're pathetic, Mara."
The crowd behind her boos and laughs as I give her a true taste of her own medicine, in front of everyone.
"You hide behind this fake, plastic bullshit. Instead of building other women up, you tear them down. Why? Because you hate yourself. You hate yourself so much that you have to make others feel like shit because it's the only thing that makes you feel even just a little better about your pitiful, bleak existence."
The look that crosses her face is a mixture of hurt and anger, all in one. She's embarrassed. Serves her right after everything she has put not only me, but so many other girls at St. A through.
"Say what you want, Valentina, but the truth is you're still a home-wrecking whore. That is nothing compared to me."
I laugh. I can't help it. It escapes past my lips before I can stop it, and she looks shocked. "No, what the truth is, is that you're a sad, broken girl inside. You should really see someone to talk about those feelings. I promise no amount of filler, no amount of silicone, definitely no amount of makeup, is going to cover all of that ugliness. Because the truth is, you're hideous. Inside and out. Now, get the fuck of my way before I show everyone just how done I am with this mean girl bullshit."
Rhys chooses that time to walk up. He looks so angry that it draws a familiar feeling of fear from me. While I appreciate the sentiment, the fact that he always wants to protect me, I have this handled. I give him a smile that I hope is sexy with a wink, then rise on my tiptoes and seal my lips over his. The entire crowd we've gathered gasps and it's climatic like a movie, so much that I laugh against his lips. He groans in frustration, leaning into me with every hard inch of him.