by H G Lynch
Tilly,
Went for a walk. I’m probably at the stream as you read this note. Come find me when you’re ready for that kiss I promised.
Spencer.
Folding the note, I tucked it into the waistband of my shorts, grinning foolishly. Deciding to skip breakfast, I found my trainers and pulled them on, knotting the laces quickly. Then I was bouncing down the porch steps and heading for the stream, eager to see Spencer. I felt so much better than I had the night before. A good night’s sleep had done a lot to refresh my weary body, and even the nightmares hadn’t been so bad. My Charm bumped against my sternum as I skipped through the trees, hopping over a patch of nettles and snagging a handful of bluebells on the way. When I could glimpse the clear, glinting water of the stream just ahead of me, I stopped and tucked one of the bluebells into my hair. Then I stepped out of the trees and turned, smiling, toward where Spencer usually sat, but he wasn’t there. I frowned. He’d said he’d be there, and so far, I hadn’t known Spencer to lie to me. Something must have kept him—maybe he’d run into Dominic and wanted to talk to him. I was sure he’d turn up soon, so I sat down and started plucking daisies for a daisy chain. Half an hour later, I’d denuded the area around my side of the stream of daisies, and made four long daisy necklaces and a bracelet. I was on the other side of the stream, and I was working on a daisy headband. My fingertips were stained green, and there was daisy gunk under my nails, and my stomach was rumbling, since I’d skipped breakfast. I was starting to think Spencer wasn’t just being held up—I was being stood up. It was so hard to believe he’d do that to me after what he’d said. So I stayed a little longer, completed my daisy headband and replaced the bluebell in my hair with the floppy flower crown. Then I slung the necklaces around my neck, tore the bracelet off my wrist, and stood up. The daisy bracelet fell apart on the ground, and I stomped on the delicate little flowers. I hopped over the stream, flower chains swinging around my neck. My Charm bumped my sternum, and I tucked it into my sky-blue t-shirt. Halfway back to my cabin, someone caught my arm from behind, and I spun, thinking it was Spencer, or maybe Dominic. Sarah flinched back from my fierce glare, her eyebrows rising into her perfect red hair. She took in my interesting jewellery and smiled. She was wearing a lot of real jewellery, including a shiny toe ring and bright rings on each of her fingers. Her white skirt swished at her ankles, and she jangled when she moved thanks to her excessive bracelets.“Wow. Are you starting a jewellery company out here?” she teased, toying with one of my necklaces.
I just stared at her. Her smile fell.
“Okay. Tough crowd. What’s wrong with you? You look more sour than Spencer at a wedding party.”I flinched at his name. Then I sighed. “It’s nothing.”She gave me a look that said she didn’t believe me, but she let it go. “Okay then. Let’s go join the others.” She took my arm and started dragging me.“The others?”“Yeah, I was coming over here to find you. We’re having lunch with the other pack, and Frank wanted you to be there. Just so the other pack knows what it’s getting into. That we’ve got a human here,” she explained.
I opened my mouth to tell her I wasn’t human, but she waved a hand dismissively at me.
“We’re not going to tell them about your little secret. That’s your thing, not ours. They don’t need to know.”I shut my mouth and let her haul me through the trees. After a moment, I asked “Why are you guys meeting with the other pack exactly?”
“Since our packs are going to be joining together instead of fighting over territory, we thought it best to get to know one another first. Make sure there aren’t any problems,” she said.
I bit my lip. Maybe that’s what Spencer got held up by, helping out with this meeting, I thought, though it seemed unlikely. Since when did Spencer take an interest in pack business, especially when there were lots of other people involved?
“It’s pretty important,” Sarah added.
I sighed, trailing after her reluctantly. I really would have rather hid out in my cabin all day. I wasn’t in the mood for talking to strangers, or really anyone for that matter. Of course, Dominic was bound to be at the lunch thing. This, I thought with an internal groan, is going to be awkward.
As it turned out, it wasn’t awkward. It was so much worse. Tables and chairs had been set up in a clearing in the trees, and the barbeque was puffing out smoke signals while Graham tended to the huge quantities of meat. There were too many people crowding the small area, most of whom I knew, but several of whom I didn’t recognise.
Chris and Annie were talking to a girl who looked about ten, and Laura was reading a magazine with a pretty blonde girl. Dominic was indeed there, talking animatedly to a very attractive blonde. The girl laughed, and Dominic grinned, his eyes lighting up in that way that meant he was pleased. Then he seemed to feel me staring, and his eyes flicked to me. He blinked, his smile falling. I couldn’t read his expression, but I lifted a hand in a cautious wave. He didn’t wave back. The girl he was talking to turned and saw me, and I heard her ask, “Who’s that?”Dominic shook his head and said something back in a voice too quiet for me to hear, and turned away. I swallowed the lump rising in my throat, and looked away, searching the crowd for someone else to talk to. Sarah had vanished into the hustle and bustle as soon as we’d arrived. When I scanned the teeming mess of people, I saw a flash of white of her skirt, and saw she was chatting easily with a young man, maybe in his early twenties. He was handsome enough, with messy, sandy blonde hair, a bit of stubble, and the naturally lithe body all the wolves seemed to have. He was smiling, clearly enthralled by Sarah, and I pursed my lips, looking around again. I spotted Desmond standing in the shadow of one of the cabins, leaning against the wall of it with his arms folded sulkily over his chest, and I started toward him until I saw a shadow opposite him move. He wasn’t alone after all. Standing just a few feet away from him, there was another boy. They didn’t appear to be talking, but as I watched, curious, I noticed something in their body language. I realised that it was the boyfriend Desmond had told me about.
With a faint smile, I started to look away, but Desmond’s eyes flashed up as if he’d sensed me watching—the same way his brother had. Catching my eyes, he lifted a hand. I waved back, grateful someone was being cooperative. I gave him a faint, knowing smile, and he ducked his head, grinning. His boyfriend stepped forward, saying something to him, and I backed away, leaving them to their privacy.
I wondered if Frank would really be upset if he found out his son was gay, upset enough to forbid his relationship. Surely he wasn’t that heartless? No parent could be, could they?
But then, what did I know about parents. I had none.
Tired of wandering around on my own, I retreated to the edge of the buzzing crowd and leaned against a tree, watching everyone getting acquainted and setting up lunch on the tables. I really didn’t know why Frank had insisted I be there. I was out of place—the ‘human’ girl among the wolves. I might as well have been I invisible, but I was okay with that, though. I didn’t want to be seen, didn’t want to have strangers asking me why I was hanging around a pack of werewolves, or how I’d become an honorary member of the pack. I just wanted to go back to my cabin and mope for a while.
Then, as my eyes roamed the crowd absently, they fell on a shadow lurking nearby. I looked up, and saw Spencer, hanging back near the trees just a few meters away from me. Seeing him, even after he’d stood me up, my heart did a little flip. I supposed it wasn’t really his fault, he’d been roped into being there, no doubt, by his father. He could make it up to me, I was sure.
Before I could even think of taking a step toward him, he broke into a smile, and I blinked, surprised. He wasn’t looking at me, though. He was smiling at a cute brunette girl standing in front of him. Wearing an orange tank-top and matching sandals, she was definitely pretty. The girl, a little older than me I was guessing, was blushing at something Spencer had said, and he was watching her with amused, hooded eyes.
Something in my gut twisted, and I
fought for breath as Spencer reached out for the girl’s hand, rubbing his thumb intimately across her knuckles. The girl giggled, fluttering her lashes at him. I wanted to puke. Then I noticed Spencer kept looking off to one side, and I followed his gaze. A little distance away, talking to a man I’d never seen before, Frank was keeping an eye on his son. My chest loosened, and it felt as if I could breathe again. Of course, Frank was watching, so Spencer had to act appropriately. He wasn’t flirting with that girl because he wanted to. He just needed to, so his father didn’t get suspicious.
I blew a sigh of relief. As if I’d called his name, Spencer’s head jerked up, and his eyes fixed unerringly on me. I saw a flash of something cross his face, and then he shut it down, expression blank. I smiled at him, and he just stared back for a moment. The girl next to him scowled, looking putout that his attention was being taken from her.
She asked him, in a decidedly unpleasant tone, “Who’s she?”
I was getting tired of people asking that already. Dropping my smile, I jerked my head, motioning for Spencer to follow me. He glanced at the girl clinging to his side, said something softly, and pried her off. With a nod at me, he slunk into the trees, leaving the girl glaring at me. I gave her a friendly, apologetic wave, and ducked into the cover of the trees to talk to Spencer.
I found him not too far in, standing under a beech tree, frowning. His hair was falling into his eyes, which were dark and brooding, his brow furrowed. I smiled when I saw him, but he didn’t smile back.
Crossing his arms unhappily, he said, “What do you want?”
I blinked at his tone. Quietly, I said, “You weren’t at the stream this morning. I wondered where you’d gotten to.” He wasn’t looking at me. His eyes were riveted on some point over my shoulder, and it was making me twitchy. It made me feel as if there was someone behind me. I shook off the feeling.
With a casual shrug, he said, “I got caught up.”
Strike two. His voice was flat and hard, his eyes like ice. It stung me, and I frowned. What was wrong with him? He was acting like…like a total dick. Like he had the day I’d met him. I’d thought we were past that, but apparently not.
“Got caught up with what?” I asked.
He shrugged again. “Stuff.”
“Stuff?” I curled my hands into fists, resisting the urge to punch him.
Another shrug. If he shrugged one more time, I was going to dislocate his shoulder.
I took a breath and counted to ten, calming down, and then I smiled hopefully up at him. He glanced at me when I took a step forward, putting my hands on his chest. I looked up at him through my lashes.
“Well, I can think of a way you can make it up to me,” I murmured, lifting myself on my toes. He turned his head away, and I sank down again. My heart and stomach sank too. Confused and hurt, I snatched my hands off his chest and took a stumbling step backward.
“I…” I blinked back the burning in my eyes and looked down. “But…you promised,” I whispered, feeling my face grow hot with humiliation. Why did he keep rejecting me? What was his problem?
He didn’t shrug again, but his tone was as dismissive as if he had. “I lied,” he said bluntly.
I choked, sucking down a breath to cool the burning in my throat. “Why?” I asked softly. Tears were starting to dampen my lashes, making the ground and Spencer’s feet look blurry. I couldn’t stand to look at his beautiful, cold face. I wanted to know why he was doing this to me. After he’d been so sweet, after he’d said he loved me. What had changed to make him suddenly act like that?
“Why do you think?” he said sharply, a mocking edge to his voice.
That sharp edge cut me like a knife. I was gritting my teeth so hard, I thought my jaw might break, trying so hard not to cry. Why did I think he was being a prick? I thought he was toying with me, like a cat with a mouse.
“But…you said…” My throat closed up briefly, and I paused. I couldn’t say it, not with him standing there looking at me with those cold, blank eyes. “What you said yesterday, what about that?” My voice wobbled, and a hot bead of water slid down my face. I turned my head to the side, so he wouldn’t see it.
He grimaced. “I–”
Whip sharp, I looked up at him, glaring. “I swear to God, Spencer, if you tell me that was a lie too, you’re going to find out exactly what a Grey witch can do with her Dark side,” my voice cracked.
More tears spilled, but I didn’t lift a hand to wipe them away. My gaze was steady on his, and then he looked away, uncomfortable, and my heart broke. A small sound like a whimper escaped my lips before I could clamp down on it. I put a hand over my mouth, closing my eyes. I felt as if he’d punched me in the gut, thought I might be sick, but I breathed around the pain and forced myself to look at him again.
Swiping the tears off my face, I drew a deep breath and levelled a glare at him. He stared at a spot on the ground next to me.
“I see,” I said, proud of how steady my voice was. “So. That’s how it is then. It wasn’t Dominic who was playing games with me after all. It was you. And I was stupid enough to fall for it, just because you saved my life. Silly me.”
I saw a muscle twitch in Spencer’s cheek, hoped I was annoying him. I was one shrug away from neutering him. I waited for him to do it. He didn’t. I was slightly disappointed.
I shook my head, watching him.
“You’re not going to say a word, are you? You’re just going to stand there like a heartless statue.”
This time, he did shrug again. My nails cut into my palms hard enough to draw blood, and I knew I had to get away from there before I did something I’d regret—like blasting him into a tree. I could feel the power to do it bubbling up inside me, with my fury, hurt, and humiliation.
Evenly, he said, “Men are animals?”
A bitter laugh burst from my mouth, and I saw him flinch. I was glad of it. I couldn’t believe he was that heartless. Distant was one thing. Cruel was another, and nobody had ever warned me Spencer was cruel. Maybe they hadn’t spent enough time with him to know, but I knew.
“Yes,” I spat. “Clearly. Well, you don’t have to worry about saving my life again. I can take care of myself.” I reached behind my neck and undid the clasp of my Charm necklace. It slid from around my neck, and I tossed it to the ground at his feet. He closed his eyes as if he couldn’t stand to look at it…or at me.
Furious, I started to walk away. I glanced over my shoulder once, saw him staring at the pebble lying in the dirt. He looked up at me, his eyes unfathomable.
With a cold smile, I spat one word at him. “Fetch.”
I walked away with tears in my eyes.
I returned to the gathering, already having wiped the tears from my eyes and pasted on a fake smile that hurt to wear. I was hunting for one person, whether he wanted to talk to me or not. I got jostled in the crowd, people bumping into me, and Sarah snagged my wrist at one point, her green eyes large as she took in my face. I hoped I wasn’t all blotchy and tearstained.
“Whoa. Tilly, what’s wrong?” she asked with more sympathy than she had earlier.
I shot her an impatient look. “You were right,” I said. “I should go for Dominic.” I snatched my hand back and slid away, determined to find Dominic. I didn’t care if he didn’t want to talk to me. I’d make him talk to me. I’d apologise, beg for him to forgive me if I had to. Anything. I’d been such an idiot, believing Spencer’s act. Sarah had tried to warn me, and I hadn’t listened. I’d stupidly imploded my friendship with Dominic before I’d even given it a chance to turn into something else.
When I finally found him, Dom was still talking to the pretty blonde girl. He looked startled when I marched up to him and, muttering an apology to the girl, snatched his arm and dragged him away from the crowd. He let me tow him until we got into the trees, and then he tugged me to a stop, and I whirled. His expression surprised me. He didn’t look angry, like I’d thought he would. He looked concerned. So sweetly concerned, even after our argume
nt the day before. It made me feel even guiltier.“Tilly, what’s going on? You look like you’ve been crying. What happened?” He reached for me, his thumb skimming my cheek, and I grabbed his wrist, pulling his hand away from my face. Instead, I put his hand on my hip, and leaned into him. He took a step back, surprised, and I snaked my arms around his waist, holding him there.“What’s going on is your half-brother is being a heartless bastard. So I owe you the biggest apology ever. I’m sorry. About everything. About letting him kiss me, about yelling at you, about…about believing his stupid lies.”
I laid my head on his shoulder, and Dominic’s hand came up reflexively to stroke my back soothingly. His touch didn’t make me quiver and burn the way Spencer’s did, but it was light and pleasant, comforting. And I really needed comforting right then.“Shh, Tilly. Slow down. Tell me, what happened with Spencer? What did he do?” Dominic asked softly.
I shook my head against his chest, and whispered, “I don’t want to talk about it. Just…tell me you forgive me, Dominic. Please. Tell me you forgive me for being an idiot, a bitch, and a terrible friend. I shouldn’t have trusted him. I trust you. I don’t want to lose that.” My eyes were burning again, and I willed the tears to stay back. My fingers were knotted in Dominic’s t-shirt, and I could feel his muscles were tense. He was silent for so long, I was sure he wasn’t going to answer, wasn’t going to forgive me. Then he relaxed a little, his other arm coming around me. He hugged me gingerly, laying his chin on the top of my head.
“Of course I forgive you, Tilly. Of course I do,” he murmured, one hand stroking my hair.
Relief swept through me, making my knees weak, and a few tears escaped from under my lids. I squeezed him tightly. Carefully, I tilted my head and touched my lips to his collarbone.