Wishful Thinking

by Evangeline Anderson

  Sometimes she wondered why she cared. When she’d first started the job, she and Christian had needed the money to survive. Her fiancé had been dead set against them taking out any more loans than they had to, which was the main reason she’d put off going to law school herself. But now with Christian making more money maybe she could afford to quit. Then she got practical—they were saving for the wedding and being suddenly unemployed would put a serious crimp in her plans.

  Besides, she needed this job as a recommendation for whatever law school she ended up attending. Atwood Dickson Senior, her boss’s father and one of the senior partners, had even promised to write her a letter when the time came. Phil knew the letter would probably talk about her excellent work habits but in her opinion, there was no higher praise than the fact that she was willing to put up with his pig of a son.

  Phil sighed to herself. She’d tried a few times over the years to let her fiancé know what she put up with at work, but his response was always the same.

  “Look, babe,” he’d say in his most reasonable voice. “I know you have it tough but I do, too. School is killing me right now and I just need you to be strong and hang in there a little while longer. I promise as soon as I get out and start my career with a good firm we’ll get married and you can ditch that crappy job and go back to school yourself. Okay?”

  Right. Only he’d been out of law school almost a year and here she was, still working at BB&D and getting nowhere fast. Phil wondered if she ought to wish for career advancement when her fairy godmother appeared that evening. But then again, who knew what the FG considered advancement? She might find herself the highest paid hooker on Seventh Avenue if she wasn’t careful. No, she’d learned the hard way that fairy magic wasn’t the answer to bettering her life. But what was?

  “Hey, sweetheart, what about that file?” Dickson’s voice broke into her inner monologue and Phil brought the Jackson file to his desk. “Good girl!” He swatted her behind and Phil had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from slapping him. Jerk! Asshole!

  “Mister Dickson, can we please get down to business here?”

  “Well, now, we can do that. Why didn’t you just say you wanted to give me the business?” He gave her a leering grin and Phil felt the skin between her shoulder blades start to crawl. God, what she wouldn’t give to be able to tell him off! Instead, she gritted her teeth and opened the file. It was going to be a long morning.

  Chapter Five

  Phil shut the door of Dickson’s office and trudged down the hallway to the break room where the first aid kit was kept. She’d managed to get a nasty paper cut from one of the files she’d been going over with her boss but it turned out to be a good thing. Dickson couldn’t stand the sight of blood so she was able to shave a few minutes off her time with him and go in search of a Band-Aid.

  “Swann!” The familiar voice was like a ray of sunshine warming her. Phil turned to see Josh behind her in the narrow hall leading away from Dickson’s office.

  “Bowman.” She tried to smile but the corners of her mouth just didn’t want to turn up. Phil knew her smile’s failure to launch was just aftermath of spending the morning with her lecherous boss. It was like treading water in a pool filled with slime—she always felt exhausted and in need of a hot shower when she finally got out of his office.

  “Hey, you got a minute? It’s almost lunch time.” Today he had on a dark green shirt with the top two buttons undone and his tie was pulled adorably askew so that she could see the natural tan of his broad chest.

  “Sure, I guess I could take my lunch now,” she said as he fell into step beside her. “So what have you been doing all day? Defragging the computers? Keeping us safe from evil viruses?”

  Josh grinned and nudged her gently with one elbow. “Nah. Trying to install a new application for the file directory that Dickhead Senior thinks will make you guys more productive.” He shrugged. “Fair warning though—it won’t. I think it’s gonna make your life hell. But don’t worry—after about a week it’s going to crash and burn and you’ll be back to a system that works.”

  Josh was the IT guy and a good one at that. Phil often wondered why he stayed in such a dead end job when he could have moved anywhere in the country and probably made a lot more money in the process. Although the senior partners at BB&D didn’t know it, he saved them hundreds of thousands of dollars each year by keeping the office computer systems running smoothly and personally vetting all the new software they purchased. If an expensive new application turned out to be a complete bust, it would either crash or be declared “incompatible” after a week or so, much to the relief of the secretaries and paralegals who actually had to deal with it.

  “Crap.” She sighed. “Why do they keep doing this to us?”

  “Haven’t you heard, Swann? Progress.” Josh furrowed his brow and made his voice deep and pompous, doing a flawless imitation of Dickson Senior.

  His expression was so comical that Phil put a hand to her mouth to stifle a giggle, forgetting the paper cut until she rubbed the wounded pad of her finger against her cheek. “Ow!” She pulled back at once and looked up at Josh. “Do I have blood on my face?”

  “Yup, looks like war paint. What did you do to your finger?” He took her hand gently in both of his and examined it.

  “It’s just a paper cut. I was going to the break room for a Band-Aid.”

  “Well, it just so happens that’s exactly where I wanted to take you. Come on.” Without relinquishing her hand, Josh led her to the break room, which was thankfully empty of the slithery Alison and any of her man-prey.

  He sat her at the small table, which was just about big enough for two, and began rummaging in the cabinets for the first aid kit. “So, are you going to the beach party Thursday?” he asked, bringing the kit to the table and pulling out hydrogen peroxide and a piece of gauze.

  Phil sighed. “Of course—how could I miss it? If it’s anything like last year I’m sure it’ll be very, ah, entertaining.”

  “Meaning we get to see Dickhead Junior in a banana hammock again, I take it.” Josh grinned.

  “Ugh!” Phil made a face. “Please, Josh.”

  He laughed, a deep rumbly sound that Phil had always liked. “What a sight—definitely a morale booster, I’d say. And isn’t that the point of the office beach day? I mean, getting to see your coworkers in their bathing suits is so much more rewarding that getting say, a raise or a bonus.” He began arranging the first aid items in front of him. The little white gauze squares looked tiny in his large hands.

  “Absolutely. Seeing all the senior partners and their hairy, sunburned backs is better than a bonus in my book any day.” She reached for the gauze but Josh pulled it away.

  “Uh-uh-uh, Swann. The doctor is in. Just sit still and let me do my thing.”

  “Oh, I didn’t realize you held an advanced degree in finger bandage-ology.” She gave up and relinquished her finger.

  “There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Swann.” Josh’s brow furrowed as he worked on her finger and he spoke with the distracted air of someone concentrating deeply on the task before them. One thing Phil liked about her best friend was the way he gave his complete attention to whatever he was interested in. When she talked to him, she always got the feeling that he was focusing on what she had to say, not just waiting for his own turn to talk—the opposite of coworkers like Kelli.

  “So speaking of coworkers in their bathing suits, you should have heard Alison describing her ‘tiny naughty bikini’ to Davis Miles this morning,” Phil said, trying to distract herself from the sting of the peroxide. If it had been up to her, she would have rinsed the cut finger in the sink and slapped a bandage on it. But typical of Josh, he was treating the whole process like a complicated and delicate surgical procedure.

  “Uh-huh. And what are you going to be wearing?” He glanced up at her and grinned, taking the innuendo out of his words. “Something that will leave us all buzzing for days with its daring cut? A fashion s
tatement to end all fashion statements?”

  Phil frowned. “Only if you promise to stay between me and Dickson Junior at all times—I don’t need to see that bright yellow Speedo pointed in my direction. I get enough of that at work.”

  Josh’s chocolate brown eyes darkened, making his friendly face stern. He had a very strong jaw and a dark five o’clock shadow despite the fact that it was only noon. For a moment, he almost looked frightening. “Is he giving you a hard time, Phil?”

  There was steel in his voice instead of laughter and Phil was reminded of what a really big guy he was. All joking aside, if he wanted to, Josh could probably break her nasty boss over one knee like a dry stick. But she didn’t want to be the cause of her best friend losing his job or committing felony assault so she just shrugged uneasily.

  “You know—no more than usual.”

  Josh looked like he was going to say something else, but then he shook his head. He deepened his voice and squared his shoulders. “You want I should break his kneecaps for ya, doll?” he asked, the teasing back in his tone.

  “Dork.” Phil slapped his shoulder with the hand he wasn’t doctoring. She was relieved that Josh wasn’t making a big deal. He was good about knowing when she just needed to vent. “He’s just hard to take on a Monday, that’s all. Especially—” She broke off, shaking her head. She had too much pride to mention how badly her birthday was going so far. It would sound like she was begging for sympathy or presents or both.

  But Josh wasn’t about to let her get away with it. “Especially what? Come on, Phil, give.”

  “Well…” When they first became friends, Phil had been shy about talking to Josh about her fiancé. But he was such a good listener that she had gradually loosened up until nothing was really off limits for discussion but her and Christian’s sex life.

  “Come on,” Josh prodded again. “You know I’m not going to stop until you tell me.”

  “It’s just that, well, this morning when I woke up I was hoping that Christian…well, you know how last year—”

  “Wait a minute—did he forget your birthday again?” Josh interrupted her halting confession, one side of his full mouth pulled down in a frown of disapproval.

  Phil nodded her head miserably. “Uh-huh. I tried to give him a hint and for a minute I thought he really had remembered. But…” She shrugged.

  “But he didn’t,” Josh finished for her again. “Damn it, Phil, you know I usually try to just act as a sounding board and not get involved with this kind of thing. But forgetting your birthday two years in a row is not good.”

  Phil sighed. “I know. It’s just…he never used to forget. Before he got this job he had more time for me—more time for us. I mean, I know he’s busy working and trying to make a name for himself at his new firm but it just…well, it hurts, Josh.”

  “Of course it does,” Josh said softly. He stopped bandaging her finger for a moment to rub one large warm hand over her forearm soothingly. “So did you say anything to him about it? Remind him?”

  “Uh-uh. He was in such a hurry to get to work and besides, it’s not like he could do anything about it at this point even if I reminded him. He already made plans for us to go out with some clients of his to Ivarone’s.”

  “So he should cancel the plans,” Josh said, the steel coming back into his voice.

  “He can’t cancel—it’s part of his job.” Phil hated that she was constantly having to defend her fiancé. Please understand, she wanted to say. Christian is really a sweet guy. He’s just been distracted lately. Lately, right. Like for the entire last year. She looked down at the table.

  “Since when is his job more important than you?” Still holding the finger he was bandaging in one hand he reached across the table and lifted her chin with the other. “Phil, do you want me to give you a guy’s perspective on this?”

  With his warm, gentle fingers under her chin she couldn’t help meeting his eyes. “I guess.”

  “He’s acting like a jerk,” Josh told her. “He doesn’t realize how lucky he is to have a girl like you but if he isn’t careful he’s going to find out—by losing you.”

  “Just because he forgot my birthday once or twice doesn’t mean I’m going to leave him!” Phil pulled away from her best friend’s gentle touch, feeling slightly panicky. She’d been with Christian for five years and the thought of being back on the market, looking for someone else to spend her life with, made her feel nauseous. There were a lot more frogs than princes out there to hear Cass, who had considerably more dating experience than Phil, tell it.

  “So you’re just going to hang around and let him treat you like that indefinitely?” Josh’s voice was soft. “Why, Phil? What are you afraid of?”

  “I’m not afraid of anything,” she lied, looking down again. “But you have to understand about Christian—he’s a good guy. It’s just that he’s been busy with work. And…and I know he’s going to feel terrible when I remind him about my birthday. But that’s no reason to leave him. I mean, it’s not like he suddenly turned into Dickson or anything.”

  She heard Josh sigh and looked up at him questioningly. But he only gave her what looked like a forced smile. “Speaking of which, it sounds to me like it’s time ol’ Dick Junior caught another virus. I have just the one in mind, too.”

  “Josh!” Phil laughed, relieved that they were back on safe territory. Their mutual dislike of her boss was something they could both agree on. In fact, it was the way they had become friends in the first place. Josh had found her crying in the supply closet after a particularly bad day at work near the end of her third week at the law firm. He hadn’t said much, but the next day someone had ‘hacked’ the BB&D website and Dickson Junior’s head had somehow been pasted on the voluptuous nude body of the Playmate of the Year. Dickson had ranted and raved and Josh had made all the right noises about correcting the problem but somehow it had still taken an entire week to get it fixed.

  Ever since that first time, whenever her boss was giving her an especially hard time, something happened to his computer. Phil thought it was surprising that he hadn’t caught on yet. But Josh was so good at looking sincere and explaining how he was trying hard to fix whatever was wrong, it apparently never penetrated Dickson’s thick skull that his PC was being sabotaged.

  “I think you’ll live now.” Josh had finally finished bandaging her finger but he continued to hold her hand, as though admiring his work.

  “Thanks, Josh.” She smiled at him and he held her gaze for a minute before releasing her hand and jumping up.

  “Okay, and now that the first aid segment of our show is done, I have something for you. Close your eyes. Now, I mean it—don’t look.”

  Phil laughed and did as he said. She heard him rummaging around in the cabinets and refrigerator and then he was behind her. “You’re peeking, aren’t you? Are you peeking?”

  “No, honestly!” Phil protested. She could smell something sweet and thought she knew what it was. This day just wasn’t getting any better.

  Josh put one large, warm hand over her eyes anyway. “Keep ’em closed,” he directed sternly and Phil heard the clattering of a china plate on the table before her.

  “Now?” she asked, blinking grimly behind his fingers.

  “No…now!” He uncovered her eyes, revealing a miniature cheesecake topped with fresh fruit. There was a single candle stuck into one of the strawberries on top.

  “Oh, Josh—it’s gorgeous.” Phil clapped her hands in delight. One of the things she loved about Josh was that for the entire time they had been friends, he had never once been the bearer of her wish-induced éclair. And she was so glad he wasn’t now. It would have spoiled things somehow, although of course she would have eaten it to avoid hurting his feelings.

  “You like? Cheesecake is your favorite, isn’t it?”

  “It is.” She looked at the beautiful little confection with delight, then looked up at her best friend. “I just thought—for some reason I thought it was an écla
ir.”

  “No way.” He made a face. “You hate those things. Anytime anyone gives you one, you ditch it as fast as possible.”

  “I sure do,” she agreed fervently. She was surprised that Josh had noticed her aversion to the daily dessert, though. Her fairy godmother’s magic flew under the radar of most non-fairy folk. “You shouldn’t have done this after you already burned me that CD.”

  “Please.” Josh arched an eyebrow at her. “Can’t you tell the difference between a pre-birthday present and a birthday present? They’re in two entirely different categories, Swann.”

  Phil laughed at his mock serious tone. “All right then. You want to share this with me?” she asked, motioning to the cheesecake. “There’s no way I can eat it all.”

  “Well, since you twisted my arm…” Josh grabbed a spare fork. “But first you have to blow out your candle and make a wish.”

  “Oh.” Phil bit her lip, feeling like a cold hand had squeezed her heart. Her wish! Zero hour was only six hours away and she still hadn’t thought of anything good to wish for. Her day had been so horrible up until Josh had met her in the hallway that she had almost forgotten about it.

  “What’s the matter?” Josh was looking at her with concern. “You look sick all of a sudden—did I say something wrong?”

  “No. I…no.” Phil tried to smile. She still had time. She would think of something. “Why don’t you blow it out for me?”

  “But then your birthday wish won’t come true,” Josh protested.

  “Oh, trust me. It’ll come true.” Phil shook her head. “You go on—blow it out and make your own wish.”

  “You got it, Swann.” Josh shrugged and puffed out the candle. “Now take the first bite—it’s only fair since it’s your birthday cheesecake.”

  “Thanks.” Phil scooped out a generous spoonful and tasted it. “Mmm, this is wonderful, Josh!” She licked the back of the spoon and went in for another bite. “But what did you wish for?”