Evie looked about the room and said, “It’s strange being here just the two of us. It’s certainly not the first time, but it has never been like this before. Hannah is really not coming back.”
“Yes, I know. She is Mrs. Leonard Townshend now. We’ll have to take well over a day’s journey by mail coach just to see her.”
The two sat there in solemn silence at this new reality. They got on well enough as the two of them, but things would not be the same without Hannah. She was, after all, the eldest. Lucy could be quite loud and bossy, but Hannah had always lent her voice to whatever it was they were dealing with at the time. Thereafter, they would have to correspond with her by letter.
After taking their baths, Lucy and Evie rejoined in her room. They slept together, arms wrapped around each other. It was comfortable, but not quite the same. Although the bed was not very big, the three of them had squeezed into each other’s quite fine, arms and legs wrapped about each other. Even with more room as the two of them, Lucy and Evie still slept on the bed’s edge.
The following day Evie went to return to Wellington Manor. She quite dreaded the experience. Since things had changed between her and the Duke, it had become quite a despairing place. She still got on well with Lady Grace, laughing and chattering merrily, but when she was absent, which was quite a bit, things became awkward.
She had begun spending more time with the other staff. Lady Grace’s governess, Miss Juliet Dean, was a pleasant companion. She was not so much older than Evie. Her fortune had greatly changed when she lost her husband to a highwayman. She was forced to take a position as governess to maintain herself. All the same she was a bright and amicable woman and made the time in Lady Grace’s absent much more durable.
Her parents remained in the same high spirits the following day. There was a bit of a row on the subject of Sir Green. Both parents implored Lucy to reconsider her position. She refused, saying that she had much better prospects. When they asked to whom she was referring, she would not say. Evie was fully aware of why that was, but said nothing. In fact, she sat in silence throughout the entire bout, sipping her tea and looking out the window.
By late afternoon, she took her leave to return to her position. She bid farewell to her family and boarded the coach. Before, it had seemed that the trip was quite long, yet when she wished it to be, it appeared to be quite short. Before long she was winding up the drive and stopping before the columns going up to the main entryway to Wellington Manor. The following week would be Lord Cornelius’ wedding, to which she was not invited. She quite preferred it and would instead be making her own trip to attend a soiree with Lady Isabella and Lady Lydia.
In the meantime, she would continue to avoid Thaddeus when possible and ignore him when not. She journeyed up the steps and was let in by the valet, Mr. Warren. She greeted him and then made her way to her room to freshen up. She had not been in long before there was a knock at the door, which was opened by Lady Grace. She sat down upon the bed and asked Evie all about the nuptials. And Evie sat down beside her and told her everything.
Chapter 23
The time had arrived for Cornelius’ nuptials. Thaddeus was not quite sure how to feel about it. His little brother was getting married. Without his father’s presence, he felt obligated to stand in his place, yet he was not sure how. What could he say to Lord Cornelius, who appeared to be much more ready for marriage than he had been? He could not be sure.
He and Lady Grace departed Wellington Manor for the long trip. They left Evie in the foyer. She gave him a tepid goodbye. The two were still estranged. Thaddeus could not quite figure out what it was about. Although he did not feel embarrassed about their kiss he felt sure that Evie was not happy about it. Her behavior since had been frigid. He felt like there was something more to it than just the kiss, but he had no idea what it might be. He simply attempted to cast it from his mind and handle the matters at hand.
Upon arrival to Stickland Hall, they were greeted by Lord Wynn, who seemed to be of high spirits. Thaddeus was not looking forward to spending time with him. There was something about Lord Wynn that he did not like. Partially, it was due to the fact that he reminded him of his father. His father had been of a far more sour nature, yet he was just as proud, gaudy, and overbearing as Lord Wynn. Thaddeus counted the time until he would be able to quit the place.
Lord Wynn attempted to draw him into the library, but Thaddeus insisted upon finding his brother. Cornelius was in the drawing room with Lady Wynn, Sarah, and a few unfamiliar people. There were so many people about. It seemed that the Wynn’s invitation list was far larger than the Wellingtons. Thaddeus had left it primarily to his brother to determine who he would like to come. They were not exceptionally close with many family members. It was common courtesy to invite some; of the others, he only picked a favored few.
There were a host of friends present, one of which being Lord Martin. Thaddeus was quite happy to see him. Lord Martin and Lady Phoebe had been traveling and Thaddeus had only been able to correspond by letter. Since he was no longer talking with Evie and only engaged in shallow conversation with most other associates, he felt the need to speak with Lord Martin most sorely. He would seek out the opportunity to get him apart as soon as he could.
First, though, he felt inclined to have a moment alone with his brother. He greeted Cornelius and said, “Is there some place we might speak privately?
“Yes. Right this way.”
Lord Cornelius led him away from the mass of people into a secluded area about the grounds. The brothers walked side by side along the path. Thaddeus said, “I thought I might speak to you confidentially ahead of the festivities. With all of the people about I figured I should do so before too long.”
Cornelius replied, “Oh yes. It seems that Lord and Lady Wynn withheld a great bit of the invitation list. Phoebe has been apologetic, but I have assured her that it was quite alright. Lord and Lady Wynn are a different sort than we are.”
“That is for certain.”
Cornelius chuckled and said, “You are not fond of my future father-in-law, I take it?”
“I don’t see how you can endure him. He is far too cheeky a fellow for my liking. Hardly a gentleman at all. I would sooner endure consumption than to spend too much time with him.”
Cornelius chuckled once more, saying, “He can be a bit expansive. He is not so bad in small doses. He rather reminds me of Father, which I take to be part of your problem.”
“He and Father are much of the same sort. He is simply less tormented.”
“Ah yes. Father could be rather morose. Yet, all the same, this occasion does seem to be lacking without him.”
“I must admit that I feel his and Mother’s absence. It should have been quite a gas to see Father with Lord Wynn. He would have despised the man.”
The two brothers shared a laugh. It had been quite some time since they had gotten on so well. It seemed that lately their talk was limited to conversations about the wedding or Thaddeus’ scandal. Thaddeus rather enjoyed this new turn. Lord Cornelius said, “So, what was it that you wanted to discuss? Is there some form of business in which we have not handled?”
“I just thought that perhaps you may have something you may want to discuss with me. I know that I am not Father, but I am the head of this family now. It is my duty to play the part.”
“I see. Well, on the one hand I do not have anything to ask. On the other, I have far too many questions. I suppose it is just another part of being a man. Figuring things out.”
“To be sure, there are decisions to be made. As head of household you will find yourself constantly making choices. If you would like my advice, follow your conscience. You are an intelligent man. No doubt you will get along just fine.”
“Thank you, Brother. I do appreciate your confidence. For a soon to be married man, I feel quite calm. Perhaps it shall not be until tomorrow that my feet grow cold.”
“The night before my wedding, I do not believe I felt very much tr
epidation. Perhaps because I had been too much about the drink. It was something about waking up the next morning and getting ready that made me wish to board a ship for a far away land.”
“But you did not.”
“No, I did not. I stayed. It was well that I did. Even given what was to follow. I do not regret marrying Abigail. It is perhaps the only worthwhile thing that I have done in my life.”
“Do you think Father was nervous on his wedding day?”
Thaddeus stood up straight and puffed out his chest. He took on an effect, saying, “No. Men of our station are not to be nervous about anything. It is not in our breeding. What have we to be nervous about? We are men of high ranking, landed men of great wealth. We make others nervous, we do not experience nervousness.”
Lord Cornelius doubled over in laughter. He said, “If I did not know better I should have thought Father had risen from the graveyard for a visit. You so resemble him and with that affectation you were quite his twin.”
“Yes, that was exactly the bit of rot Father would be telling you right now. It is exactly the bit of rot that men like he and Lord Wynn believe. The truth is, Duke, Marquess or not, marriage is a major change. You are not truly a man until you are responsible for the care of others. It is natural to be weary. Being a man is not to be without fear or pain, it is to persevere through it. Lady Sarah shall be depending upon you now, as will your children to follow. Take it as an honor and do well to remain a man of integrity. Wellington men are many things; stubborn, proud, foolish, and many other such calamites, but we are strong. You will make a noble husband, Lord Cornelius. I assure you.”
Cornelius was deeply touched by Thaddeus’s speech, he could see that he it took an effort to restrain his emotion. He put out a hand to shake his brother’s. Thaddeus grasped it firmly, pulling his brother into an embrace. Upon release, he could see tears brimming in his brother’s eyes. Lord Cornelius whispered, “I do so miss Mother and Father. Abigail too. But I am so glad to have you here with me, Brother.”
Thaddeus gave him a nod and they turned to continue down the path back to the main house. By the time they re-entered, Lord Cornelius was well in hand. He rejoined his fiancée’s side and spoke amicably with her guests. Thaddeus could no longer avoid Lord Wynn’s company, as the man personally ushered him into the library where a group of other men were gathered. They were like most gentlemen out of sight of ladies and lower ranks: loud, bombastic, and filled with anecdotes. Many of the men talked at once, filled with drink and feeling at liberty amongst the highest of the peerage to be free of all pretenses.
Thaddeus was bustled about by Lord Wynn and other gentlemen who continued to laugh at jokes that they had only half-told. The Duke took a drink and endured, looking about for Lord Martin. When Lord Wynn became enthralled in a debate with another gentlemen over who had the finer wares, Thaddeus was able to slip out unobserved.
He went about looking for Lord Martin amidst the fray. He found him out on the terrace with Phoebe, Grace, and a far more reserved group playing a genial game of charades. Thaddeus drew Lord Martin apart to a far end of the terrace which was deserted. Lord Martin said, “I searched for you early, but no one seemed to know where you had gone. I got caught up in the madness of the library and it took quite an effort to free myself.”
“I have only just removed myself from there. Earlier, I went for a walk about the grounds with Cornelius.”
“Ahh. And how did that go?”
“It went well. I said what I needed to say.”
“Like run?”
“No. I simply advised him on what his duties were now as a husband.”
“Excellent. I rather thought that part might fall upon me.”
“I know what my duties are.”
“At times. I wanted an audience with you. Your letters have been worrisome.”
“Yes, well I have not quite been fairing so well.”
“What seems to be troubling you?”
“I have not been feeling like myself lately.”
“You felt like yourself before?”
“I just mean that I’m not sure what’s the matter with me. I feel like something’s haunting me. I can’t describe it any other way. There is just something there and it makes me feel in disarray.”
“Do you think it’s Abigail?”
“Perhaps.”
“You know it could be a shadowy figure known as guilt.”
“Guilt for what?”
“You have been quite scandalized. You may not have done exactly what it was you were accused, however, we both know you are certainly not innocent.”
“I do not believe that is it.”
“When did this start?”
“Within the last month.”
“What has changed?”
“I do not know. Evie and I are not on good terms, however…”
“That is it. I should have known.”
“That is not it.”
“What happened between the two of you?”
“I had a moment of weakness. I expressed to her some of my sufferings. I believe that she judges me for it.”
“That is all?”
“We did kiss, but I highly doubt that would be the cause of all of this trouble.”
“You kissed her, you mean.”
“Yes, I kissed her.”
“What did she do?”
“She drew away from me and left the room.”
“And you have not spoken to her since?”
“Not meaningfully, no.”
“I warned you.”
“It was just a brush of the lips.”
“You must consider Miss Evie’s position. She is in your employ, likely to be either courting or in pursuit of courtship. Of course she would not find it desirous to be kissed by you. She has no power in the matter. If it were discovered, it would be she who would be harshly judged, decreasing her chances of becoming wed.”
“None of that has happened.”
“No, because she got up and walked away.”
“I still do not believe this to be the cause of my trouble.”
“Of course you do not. I do believe that Abigail is in your mind causing you grief. It has not been so long since she has expired.”
“I am aware.”
“Why did you seek me out if you did not wish to discuss it?”
“I do wish to discuss it…”
Thaddeus simply did not like the direction in which the discussion had turn. Perhaps in his mind, behind the place of acknowledgement he had himself thought of the things in which Lord Martin mentioned. He simply did not like to hear it said aloud. He had done as much as he could to move on beyond his life with Abigail. It did him no good to dwell in his loss.
He thought about his father and cursed him once again. Nobility came with many resources, yet it left its members at a disadvantage when it came to matters of the heart. They were not bred to cope or even acknowledge feelings. Nobility was about posturing and persevering. Because there was a family name to protect and a family fortune to maintain.
Thaddeus said, “It matters not. I should not have mentioned it.”
“Now you sound like your father.”
“Do not ever say that!”
“It is true.”
“This discussion is over.”
“I will simply say, that it may do you well to apologize to Miss Evie.”
“I have nothing to apologize for.”
“It is clear that you have come to rely upon her company and conversation. Without it you are even more disturbed than usual. You must make amends.”
“Now that I think of it, we will depart for the seaside soon. I shall be quite fine with the scent of the sea.”
“You are a noble gentleman, My Lord. A prideful, noble gentleman.”
Thaddeus discontinued the conversation and wandered over to sit amongst the group as they played charades. He wondered why he had sought the counsel of Lord Martin. Although he was his close confidante, Martin had alwa
ys been of great sensitivity. It had aided Thaddeus in the times he behaved with cruelty to Abigail. Other times, he had found his advice to be entirely unsuitable. Apologize to Evie? He could hardly see why he should. He had done her no great harm. Perhaps, if she were so fragile, he had not lost very much with her companionship.
It was not long before Thaddeus found his way to the quarters designated for him and went to bed. He had a troubled night of sleep, turning over constantly. He thought perhaps it was the foreign bed. He felt that he had barely slept when the time came for him to rise and ready himself for Lord Cornelius’ wedding. He went about putting on his breeches and shirt sleeves, before donning his waistcoat and going out to find Lord Cornelius. He met Lord Martin first and the both of them went to Cornelius’ rooms to check up on him.
The Roguish Ways of a Hopeless Duke Page 17