by Holly Jaymes
He groaned as his hands gripped my hips. Then in a quick move, he scooped me up.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“To the shower. I’m going to get clean and fuck you at the same time.”
My girly parts were already tingling. “Is it really possible to have sex in the shower? It seems dangerous.”
“It’s just like fucking up against a door, except a little wetter.”
He was right. Having sex in the shower was like having sex against the door, only wetter. It was also more sensual. The way the water glided over his skin was beyond sexy. I loved running my soapy hands all over his body, and to feel his hands sliding over mine. It was my new favorite place to touch Theo Wolfe.
After we were clean and sated from the shower, Theo made me a delicious dinner, which he served out on the terrace. It was all very romantic and I had to keep reminding myself that this was just a simple little fling, an affair that would flame bright, but eventually would burn out.
After dinner, I thought he might suggest we go over lines in the new script as we often did during our brief time together, but instead, he suggested that we watch a TV or a movie. We ended up watching Pride and Prejudice, after I told him how he made me think of Mr. Darcy as he walked across the meadow to me the other day. It felt so very normal to sit with him on the couch with a glass of wine and his arm wrapped around me.
At the end of the movie when Mr. Darcy started walking across the field toward Elizabeth Bennet, Theo watched for a few moments as the music swelled and then he lifted the remote and turned it off.
“Hey,” I said, turning to look at him. “This is the best part.”
“No, this is the best part.” He put our wine glasses down and then he pushed me back on the couch, covering my body with his. “I’m going to make you forget all about Mr. Darcy now. Unless you have a problem with that.”
I pulled him close, loving his weight pressing me into the couch. “I have no problem with it.”
Then he proceeded to use his hands and his mouth and all of his body to make me forget about Mr. Darcy.
I Am Madeline’s
Theo
I spent the drive back from Woodstock to Manhattan second-guessing the wisdom of having gone up there in the first place. Yes, I’d convinced Madeline to spend time with me again, and yes, I suspected that re-igniting our fling would fix the chemistry we lost in our work. But spending time with her family made me realize that she deserved more than what I had to offer. I respected her and I wanted to help her further her career, but I couldn’t give her the kind of love and security that she clearly got with her grandparents. It seemed unfair of me to take up her time when it could be used with somebody else better suited for her. At the same time, I was selfish enough to take what she would give me.
I spent the next day home doing production company work and reviewing scripts and other materials that my staff had sent over. We had already selected our next production and so I went through the plans that were started on it.
Although the day was still warm, I decided to take a run in the afternoon to get rid of the pent-up energy and the lingering guilt I was having over Madeline. When I arrived home, I’d just finished gulping down a glass of water when there was a knock at the door. Opening it, I saw Madeline stood there, looking so beautiful I almost thought she was a mirage. A figment of my imagination conjured because I was wishing she was there. But she was real, and all my good intentions at not being selfish completely vanished, which was how she ended up in my shower naked, with me making love to her once again. And then again after dinner, when I realized I was feeling jealous of Mr. Darcy in the way Madeline was enamored by him walking across the meadow on my TV screen. It was clear that Madeline held me under some sort of spell. I was helpless to do the right thing because she felt so necessary to me. The way I was feeling right now. I couldn’t give up Madeline any more than I could give up breathing, so I didn’t.
On Monday I was back on set, ready to work again. Madeline didn’t have any work until midweek, so I didn’t have to worry about giving us away.
As I exited my trailer ready to do a heist scene, Corrine met me on the way to set.
“Is everything good between you and Madeline?” she asked me.
I looked at her and wondered if maybe she knew for sure that Madeline and I were more than just friendly coworkers. I put my acting skills to work by giving her a shrug. “It’s all fine.”
“So you talked to her?”
Starting to feel a little irked, I said, “Yes, I talked to her. It’s gonna be fine.”
She held out her hand, grabbing my arm to stop me. “It doesn’t sound fine, Theo. This is really important. You need to do whatever you did before to spark that electricity on film. You’ve got to use that Theo magic to seduce her back into being charmed by you.”
I stared at her for a moment, feeling pissed that she thought I was the type of man who would pretend to be into a woman simply to get a performance. It wasn’t just disrespectful, it also suggested that Madeline and I weren’t very good actors.
“We know our job and we’re going to do it,” I snapped and then left her to deal with makeup and hair.
I did my work for the day and arrived home that evening just after seven. I’d messaged Madeline when I was on my way back, and I found her at my door with a couple of takeout bags of food.
“I can't cook but I can order takeout.” She held up the bags and grinned like she was pleased with herself.
I looked at her with a fear that maybe I was doing exactly what Corrine had asked me to do. Not that I was completely dishonest in being with Madeline. The feelings I had, whatever they were, were true and real. But what if I was using her just for my own needs? Was that any different than using her to get a performance?
“Are you alright?” she asked, looking at me with concern on her face.
I smiled. “Just a long day.” I opened the door to let us both in.
She carried the food to my kitchen, setting it on the counter. She went through my cupboards, pulling out plates and gathering silverware from my drawers. It hit me that she looked comfortable in my kitchen. Almost like she belonged there.
I leaned a hip against the counter and crossed my arms over my chest as I watched her serve up our meal. “Can I ask you something?”
She stilled for a moment and then looked at me. “Yes.”
“When this thing between us started, we both agreed that it was probably risky.”
She nodded in agreement.
“In terms of my own reputation, I decided I don’t care. But I do care about whatever this is between us coming back to hurt you. I know you’re concerned about it too.”
Her brow furrowed, giving her that worry crease in her forehead. It made me wish I hadn’t gone down this road in the conversation. I should’ve just pulled her in my arms like I really wanted to do. But it was too late now, I had already started. “I’m just curious how you’re handling this, I guess.”
The quizzical expression began to morph into worry. “Are you having second thoughts about it?”
I shook my head vehemently. “Hell no. I like spending time with you. But I’m well aware of how selfish I’m being in that. You’re the one who’s taking on all the risk here.”
She shrugged and turned her attention back to serving our food. “We agreed that when we were working or out in public, we wouldn’t be seen together.”
“And you're okay with that? Being hidden away like some secret?” Maybe that was what was bugging me. It felt wrong that she was like a sordid secret.
She put her palms on the counter and took a breath and I hated myself for putting her in a position where she looked so uncomfortable.
“It is what it is, Theo. I'm just taking it one moment at a time. This moment, I’m here to have dinner and spend time with you. Now, if something has changed, please let me-”
“Nothing’s changed.” I put my hands on her arms and turned her to me, look
ing down into her lovely hazel-gray eyes intently. “Nothing’s changed.”
To prove my point, I crushed my lips down on hers, wanting to kiss away all her concerns and fears. It took a moment but eventually her arms wrapped around my waist and she sank into the kiss with me. I carried out the kiss as long as I could before I needed a breath.
When I pulled away, I said, “One moment at a time,” repeating how she explained this relationship between us.
I used the time at dinner to push myself out of this crazy funk that I was feeling and that made absolutely no sense. I wanted to spend time with Madeline and she was here. So what was my problem?
By the time dinner was done, I was back to my old self. We washed the dishes together, and I splashed water on her, telling her I wanted to see what she looked like in a wet t-shirt contest. Later that night, as I finished coming inside her and then rolled off, pulling her into my arms, I made a vow that I would be like her. I would live in the moment, savoring everything we had right here and right now. I wouldn’t worry about the future or about what could happen. I wouldn’t think about when it was time for us to walk away.
For the next couple weeks, that was the attitude that I maintained. On set and out in public, I was a bachelor actor. But at night, in the sanctity of my home, I was Madeline's.
I. Was. Madeline's.
The thought shook me awake in the middle of the night. Immediately my hand snaked out to see if she was still with me. Normally she’d return to her apartment and not stay the night, which was something that was increasingly more difficult for me to accept. And now, being awoken by the thought that I was hers, and even more than that, I desperately wanted her to be mine, I felt shaken to the core.
I was in love with Madeline Fox.
At least I thought I was. What else could these feelings be? My entire being was consumed with thoughts of her. Feelings for her. Surely that was love.
“Are you okay?” her sleepy voice said next to me as her hand pressed over my chest, over my heart. I put my hand over hers, holding it there as my brain fumbled with what to say. Did I tell her I loved her? A part of me wanted to and yet a bigger part of me was terrified.
And then there was the fact that nothing had changed in our situation. We couldn’t be together, at least not now, because of the appearance of it all. The public would think she was just another on-screen dalliance of mine, or that she had slept with me to get the role or further her career. I knew that was a situation she definitely didn’t want to be in. So what good was it in telling her my feelings, only to have her tell me that she couldn’t love me back? Having spent my entire childhood with parents who I knew couldn’t love me back, I wasn’t going to put myself in a position to hear it again from somebody else.
“Yeah,” I answered her question, taking a breath to settle my nerves. “Just a weird dream.”
She maneuvered her body over mine and all my crazy thoughts dissipated as her smooth, warm skin settled against me. My hands ran over her hips and down to her ass, giving her soft butt cheeks a light squeeze. My dick started to thicken, which was no surprise as it seemed like it was always in a semi-state of arousal around her anyway.
She kissed me, sending those shimmery sparks of sensation coursing through my bloodstream. In the darkness of night, and in the cocoon of my apartment that was our own little world, I held her.
I realized then that it had to be love that I was feeling because I wanted to be with her like this forever. Not in the forever I’d felt before that was all about erotic sensation. No, I wanted to be like this forever, holding her in my arms and cherishing her. Of course, I still couldn’t tell her that, but I could show her.
I wrapped my arms around her, and rolled us until I was on top. I gripped her hands and kissed her, pouring all the emotion I felt into the kiss. Would she feel it?
Then I used my hands to worship her body, stroking and caressing her in the way I’d learned she loved. I followed with my lips, kissing and sucking her soft skin from her lips to her jaw, over her collarbone and down to her tits, along her smooth stomach and down to her wet pussy. I worked her, until her sweet juices filled my mouth, and even then I continued my journey along her body, kissing her thighs and down to her ankles. Then I worked my way back up, making her come a second time as I sucked her clit, and then worked her up again, as I lavished her tits.
Finally, I took her hands in mine, gripping them as I brought them over her head.
“Look at me, Madeline,” I said, my voice hoarse with desire and emotion.
Her eyes fluttered open. She watched me, and the words “I love you” sat on the tip of my tongue. Instead, I kissed her and then thrust my dick inside her until it couldn’t fill her anymore. Emotion swept through me at the feel of her wet, warm pussy holding me inside her, and I buried my face in her neck to rein it in. I loved her and wanted her desperately. But this wasn’t just about me. It was selfish to ask her to risk her reputation simply because I needed her emotionally. So, I held it in, and instead, focused on her.
Duped
Madeline
Over the course of the last few months that Theo and I had been engaging in illicit activities, we had sex in a variety of ways involving a host of different moods and places. But the way he was touching me now felt so different from any of the other ways he touched me before. His movements were slow and languid, heating my blood, melting my body. I wanted to believe that it meant something, but more than likely it was just another way to have sex. He enjoyed showing me new positions and new places to have sex, so perhaps this was just another one of his attempts to show me a new way to make love.
I sank into it, opening myself to it because even if it was just another round of sex to him, for me it was so much more. It had become clear to me, not long after I returned from visiting my grandparents, that I was in love with Theo Wolfe. I was in love with everything about him, which was surprising considering at one time I thought he was the epitome of everything I despised about men. But as it turned out, he was so much more than his reputation suggested. He was a brilliant actor, having a command of nuance to deliver emotion from a character. He was attentive to everyone who worked for him on the set. Even to the actors who had no lines, he would introduce himself and welcome them, giving them a pep talk and hope that maybe someday they could be as famous as him. He was acutely aware of my own concerns about my future in the business and so while we were working, we were friendly and able to deliver all the snap, crackle, pop that we had when we started, but when Corrine called “cut”, we would break apart. We didn’t have lunch together and we rarely talked unless it was about the scene.
Only at night, back at his place, did we give each other our full, undivided attention. I enjoyed our secret little fling. There was something exciting at knowing that nobody knew all the wonderful things we did late at night. And it wasn’t just sex, although that was spectacular. We also talked about our hopes and dreams. I learned that he seemed to be a good businessman as he plotted his way forward on the next project his company planned to produce. Theo wanted to create financially-successful and highly-acclaimed movies, but he wasn’t interested in churning out the same old stuff that normally came out of the movie industry. I admired that he knew what he wanted, he knew his vision, and he wasn’t going to sacrifice it. Come what may, he was going to produce and do things his way.
Laying under him as his hands and lips worked their magic, I so wished that I was one of the things he wanted. I wished that being with me was part of his vision for the future. There was even a part of me that didn’t care what people would think if it came out that we were together. I was prepared to tell them that I loved him, even though apparently, I couldn’t bring myself to say the words to him. I could only do the next best thing, which was to show him through my touch.
His body filled me. His fingers flexed and gripped my hands. His lips consumed mine. I was his. Responsive to his touch and powerless to do anything but love him. He tore his lips awa
y, cascading them along my jaw.
“Do you feel me, Madeline?” he whispered in my ear. “Do you feel what you do to me?”
“Yes,” I gasped, arching up, trying to take him in me deeper. “I feel you.” I love you. I bit my lip to keep from saying that.
He moved in and out of me, sending delicious sensations from my pussy outward. My blood was pumping hot and thick, like each time he thrust in, he was infusing more of himself into my essence.
“Fuck…I need to come…” he groaned as he buried his face in my neck again.
“Come. I want to feel you come.” I wanted to feel everything.
“Come with me. Take me over…I fucking love it when you take me over…”
He shifted his hips slightly and I tilted my pelvis so the next time he plunged in, he hit me in that one exquisite spot, and sent me spiraling out of control into bliss.
I cried out as my entire body was consumed with the power of him and the orgasm he sent through me. He let out a long, feral growl, and then he was coming too. Thrusting, pumping, until together we collapsed in a boneless mass.
I held him to me, wanting him to feel my love, even if I wasn’t brave enough to say the words.
The four months of filming had flown by in a flash. It was my last day on set, while Theo still had another couple of weeks. Today, we were filming a scene that actually occurred at the beginning of the film, even though it was the last one we were filming together. In the scene, Nicolette and Jack were at odds and engaged in a heated argument that resulted in her slapping him. Theo and I had practiced the night before, but instead of parting ways as the scene called for, we ended up naked with him spanking my ass.
We hadn’t talked about what would happen once we finished filming, but I was going with the assumption that as long as I was in the same building, and as long as he was opening the door to me when I showed up in the evening, we would continue on. That was until one of us got another job that took us away. As it was, I was seriously considering a script that would take me to Croatia for three months. The feminist in me hated that I was having second thoughts about doing it because it would take me away from Theo. If I was serious about my career, I couldn’t concern myself with a fling. I couldn’t make decisions based on a wish that Theo and I would evolve into something more than what we were.