Expecting You

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Expecting You Page 13

by Claire Cullen


  “I think so. I mean, I’m pretty sure. I didn’t have insurance, but a friend let me use theirs. Not legal, not really, but my heats were destroying my life. I couldn’t work, I could barely make enough money to feed myself. Harper was the only reason I still had a roof over my head…”

  A sob escaped the omega, and Beckett closed the distance between them, settling his hands on Zac’s shoulders. “Let’s just slow this down, okay?”

  Zac lapsed into silence, staring at him through tears.

  “You got pregnant at the clinic on Gracebank Street?”

  “Yes.”

  “When?”

  “The eleventh of August, at eight a.m. Dr. Roberts. It was supposed to be Dr. Hains, but she was out with the flu.”

  “And you are pregnant? You’ve taken a test?”

  Beckett was afraid to get his hopes up. There were so many ways this could have gone wrong.

  “Oh, yeah.” Zac stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled out a folded picture, handing it over. “It was early when they scanned me, forty days. You can’t see much.”

  Beckett grasped the picture tightly, his eyes blurring with tears. “You… You didn’t terminate?”

  Zac shook his head, fresh tears trailing down his cheeks. “It crossed my mind, but… I knew someone wanted this baby. They wouldn’t have gone to so much trouble otherwise. And if I did, I’d have ended up back in the same position I started, with my life collapsing around me.”

  Beckett forced his attention away from the ultrasound and back to Zac.

  “About my friends,” the omega said. “They were just trying to help me. They shouldn’t get into trouble for that. Can’t… can’t we work something out?”

  Beckett felt like he’d missed a trick. “Trouble? Who said anything about trouble?”

  “We broke laws. It’s fraud, what I did. But I’m the one who did it. Not them. If anyone has to face the consequences, it should be me.”

  Zac shuddered under his touch, and Beckett let go of his shoulders, opened his arms, and engulfed the tearful omega in a hug.

  “You are not going to be in any trouble, believe me. The clinic made a huge mistake. One that pales in comparison to what you did.”

  He pulled back, cupping Zac’s face gently in his hands.

  “I am so sorry, Zac. I can’t imagine what you’ve been going through. None of this is fair to you. And I know it’s asking a lot to expect you to bring this baby to term. I promise you, here and now, that there will be no repercussions if you don’t. You didn’t sign up to be a human incubator. Your body, your choice.”

  It hurt to say it, but it needed to be said. Zac had more than enough taken from him by other people’s bad decisions. Beckett wouldn’t force this on him, no matter the cost.

  “But I want to. Don’t you see? Even before I knew it was yours, I wanted to do the right thing by this baby. When I realized what it would mean to you and Luca… it just made the decision easier.”

  A weight lifted off Beckett’s shoulders, and he took what felt like his first deep breath in months.

  “You do? You’re sure?”

  Zac laughed, even as tears slid down his cheeks. “It’s the only thing I am sure about right now. These last few weeks have been a nightmare. I was so afraid I’d lose my job and end up in an omega shelter and—”

  “You don’t have to worry about any of that,” Beckett promised him. “I’ll make sure you have what you need. And as for the clinic, we have plenty of leverage against them, and I have a lawyer who knows how to use it to our best advantage.”

  That seemed to soothe some of Zac’s fears, as the omega took a shuddering breath and calmed a little. Beckett thought if he went a step further, gave Zac some security, it would take away some of the stress that the accidental pregnancy had brought about.

  “We can have my lawyer draft up a contract as well. It’ll ensure that everything’s aboveboard. I can make sure you have enough money to be comfortable, during and after the pregnancy.”

  Zac blinked at him, sniffling. “I don’t need your money to have this baby. I’m doing this for you and Luca, for this little life inside me that’s so wanted it almost hurts. I won’t get rid of it, I promise. You don’t have to… pay me off.”

  Beckett took a mental step back, realizing he was getting ahead of himself.

  “That’s not what I’m trying to do. I just don’t want you to feel under pressure, whether that’s monetary or otherwise. Whatever you need during this pregnancy, I can arrange it. Maybe an apartment?”

  “Why would I need an apartment? I live here,” Zac pointed out. “How can I look after Luca if I’m somewhere else?”

  “I thought maybe you might not want to.” Being their surrogate seemed like enough of an ask without adding nannying on top of it. “I can pay you the same salary. You won’t lose out.”

  “But what about Luca? He needs me. I can help him.”

  “You are helping him. You’re doing something amazing that’s going to save his life.”

  “But you don’t want me to be his nanny anymore now that I’m pregnant? You don’t want people to see me, right? Your pregnant nanny? Because there’ll be comments, gossip. It’ll make you look bad.”

  Zac was crying all over again, and that was Beckett’s fault.

  “No, that’s not it at all. If you still want to nanny for Luca, I am more than happy for you to continue. As long as you’re sure it’s not too much.”

  Zac deflated, his anger draining away. “Oh.”

  “I think I’m putting my foot in it. Both feet, right in my mouth, in fact.”

  “At least I can blame my hormones,” Zac said, his cheeks flushing a deeper red.

  “Let’s take a giant step back. So. You’re pregnant.”

  “With your baby.”

  “And now we both know. No decisions need to be made right away, about anything. The most important thing for today is that it’s out in the open. How about we sleep on it and talk again tomorrow?”

  Only a few hours previously, he’d been wondering about how to broach his feelings with Zac. About breaking that all too prominent rule about not falling for the nanny. And now things had gotten impossibly complicated. His feelings were the least of his worries, and he couldn’t afford to entertain them, not now. The last thing Zac needed was the pressure of a romantic relationship on top of being his accidental surrogate and Luca’s nanny. It was one ask too many.

  “That sounds like a sensible plan,” Zac said quietly. He paused, looking like he wanted to say more, but shook his head instead. “Goodnight, Beckett.”

  “Night, Zac. Sweet dreams.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Zac woke with a groan, realizing as he prised his eyes open that everything had changed. The truth was out.

  He sat up and spied his phone, deciding the first thing he needed to do was call Harper. The omega had spent enough time worrying about him.

  “Morning, duck. Sorry about my state of panic last night.”

  Harper sounded contrite and a little embarrassed.

  “Don’t be sorry. I’m the one who’s sorry. But it’s all okay, Harper. I talked to the PI. He doesn’t work for the clinic; he works for Beckett. I was right before. It’s Beckett’s baby.”

  A short silence followed.

  “Did you eat cheese before bed again? Because those are some weird dreams.”

  “Not a dream, Harper. Beckett and I talked. It’s true. The clinic made a mistake with his embryo. They put it in me instead of Austin, his surrogate.”

  “Wait, Austin?” Harper groaned. “He was in the waiting room that day. We even chatted for a few minutes before they called him in.”

  “Yeah. The poor guy got my implant.”

  “Don’t feel too sorry for him. You got the short end of the stick. His only lasts five years. Yours hangs around for eighteen-plus.”

  “Harper!” Zac laughed despite himself.

  “So what is Beckett saying? Does he know about the whole�
�� you being Aaron thing?”

  “He doesn’t care about that. I think he’s just relieved the baby’s okay. But he was acting weird. First he offered me money, then an apartment. He didn’t want me to be Luca’s nanny, and then he did. I’m not sure he knows what he wants.”

  “And you, duck? What do you want? Because the last time we had a good heart-to-heart about your handsome alpha employer, you were pretty smitten with him.”

  “That was before I figured out I was carrying his baby.”

  “A kid usually seals the whole romance deal. Just saying.”

  “Yeah, well. I feel like it’s put a pregnancy-bump-sized distance between us. I wasn’t exactly boyfriend material when I was the nanny. There’s no way he’s going to want that now that I’m a walking incubator.”

  It came out more bitter than he’d intended.

  “What planet are you living on? He’s an alpha, and you’re an omega pregnant with his baby. The only reason he offered you an apartment was because he knows he won’t be able to keep his hands off you. Alphas are suckers for baby bumps.”

  Zac suspected that wasn’t Beckett’s problem.

  “Maybe, or maybe he doesn’t want me too close. It’s one thing being a child’s nanny, it’s another to give birth to them. Maybe he’s worried I’ll get too attached?”

  Truth be told, he was worried about that, too. How did it work once the baby was born? Or when Luca started school? Would there come a day when Beckett didn’t need a full-time nanny anymore? Or what if he married again, and his new husband didn’t want a nanny around the house?

  He said as much to Harper.

  “You’re getting way too ahead of yourself, duck. Take a deep breath, wiggle your toes, and focus on now. On today. And speaking of today, I’ve got an early shift. Talk to you later, okay?”

  “Yeah. Thanks, Harper.”

  He showered, shaved, and dressed, checking on a still-sleeping Luca before he padded into the kitchen. Beckett was already up, drinking coffee at the breakfast counter.

  “Good morning.” He greeted Zac with a bright smile, and some of the tension between them eased.

  “Hi.”

  “I wanted to say sorry, about last night. I was just… overwhelmed. How are you feeling? How’s the morning sickness?”

  “It’s not so bad,” he assured the alpha, touched by his concern.

  “I ordered some ginger tea. Darcy used to swear by the stuff when he was pregnant with Luca.” Beckett paused, wincing. “Is that weird? I’m sorry if it’s weird.”

  The alpha was nervous, which wasn’t like him.

  “It’s not weird. You’re very thoughtful, thank you.”

  He got the overnight oats from the fridge and started doling them out into bowls. He was just ladling out the last portion when he realized he’d forgotten something.

  “Brendan.”

  “What?”

  “Your PI. You, um, you should call him.” Zac had meant to mention their meeting to the alpha last night, but it had slipped his mind what with everything else.

  “Already did, first thing this morning. He told me about your chat. I am wondering, though… were you going to tell me if he hadn’t found you?”

  “I… I think so, eventually. I was still in denial about it all.”

  Beckett nodded slowly. “That’s understandable. Anyway, I’ve been thinking about our next steps.” He tapped the counter idly. “I guess the first thing to do is make sure that you and the baby are healthy. Would that be okay with you?”

  Zac hesitated, turning to face the alpha. “You mean, go back to the clinic?”

  He was reluctant, and not just because he suspected he might be persona non grata there once they figured out what he’d done. The clinic was where things had gone so wrong. What if they made another mistake?

  “Oh, hell no. No one in my family is stepping foot across the threshold of that clinic again. I’ve got the name of an obstetrician who comes highly recommended. Rafe, Frankie’s father, gave me her name. Or if you have a doctor you’d prefer to see, that’s fine. I’ll cover any costs.”

  Zac felt himself flush. “The only doctor I’ve seen was at the free community clinic. I’m sure they’d see me again, but…”

  “We probably need someone a little more specialized. You’re more than welcome to do your own research, find someone you’re happy with.”

  He was so pleased that Beckett offered that. It was nice to be given a choice.

  “If Rafe recommended them, I’m sure they’re great.”

  “Then I’ll go ahead and make an appointment for you, if that’s alright? I’ve already talked to my health insurance about extending your coverage on my policy.”

  “You have?”

  “Called them right after I spoke with Brendan. They’re sorting it. I’ll forward the details.”

  “Thanks. And yes, that’s fine about the appointment.”

  Beckett nodded, reaching for his coffee before thinking better of it. “Would it be okay if I came with you? It’s fine if you’d rather go alone or if you don’t want me in the room with you. Maybe you’d like to bring a friend instead?”

  Zac knew Harper would accompany him, but he could also see the longing in Beckett’s eyes. After all the stress and worry, he deserved to see firsthand that his baby was okay.

  “You should come. I don’t mind.”

  “If you’re sure. I don’t want you to feel like I’m pushing in. If you need space, just say so.”

  Zac wasn’t sure what he needed, but it wasn’t space. It already felt like a chasm had opened up between them.

  “I’m good right now. I’d like things to keep going as they have been. I mean, why should they change?”

  He could think of a dozen reasons, just off the top of his head. No matter how hard he tried to deny it, this changed everything.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Beckett dropped Luca off at his grandmother’s house, then drove back home. Zac was ready and waiting when he got there, looking nervous as he climbed into the passenger seat.

  “I’ve heard Dr. Smith is lovely,” he assured the omega.

  “I’m not worried,” Zac said, but his words didn’t quite ring true.

  “It’s okay if you are. I feel like I’ve drunk three cups of coffee this morning.”

  “Are you sure you didn’t? Sometimes I think you forget you’ve already had two.”

  Beckett aimed a mock glare his way that the omega pretended not to see. Things were still weird between them, a tension he couldn’t quite figure out how to ease.

  “Left here,” Zac said quietly, and Beckett took the turn. “There’s Harper.”

  The omega was standing in front of the apartment building that Zac had apparently called home before moving in with him and Luca.

  Harper climbed into the back seat with a cheery, “Good morning.”

  “Nice to see you again, Harper.”

  “You too.”

  “Are you sure you can spare the time?” Zac asked, twisting around in his seat.

  “For you, always. I swapped shifts with Dessie. He loves getting off early on Fridays.”

  “We appreciate it, all the same,” Beckett said.

  “Well, I’ve always wanted to play chaperone,” the omega quipped. “Never thought I’d get the chance. People don’t trust omegas not to make any situation a threesome.”

  Beckett almost choked. Beside him, Zac went rigid with tension.

  “Harper!” he hissed.

  Beckett’s tongue came loose, and he barked out a laugh. “Your boyfriends’ parents must love you.”

  “I’ll have you know I can be very charming. Zac’s mother adores me.”

  Beckett glanced in the rearview mirror, catching Harper’s narrowed gaze.

  “I wonder what she’ll make of you?” the omega added.

  “Harper,” Zac said again, though it was pure exasperation this time.

  Beckett knew he should leave well enough alone, but he had to ask.
“Have you two… dated?”

  He caught the roll of Harper’s eyes. “Every alpha’s wet dream, isn’t it?”

  Zac groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Can I go back to bed and start the day over?”

  “Not enough time,” Beckett told him apologetically. “We’ll have to salvage what we can. Just close friends, I take it?”

  Omega relationships could be complicated sometimes. Darcy hadn’t been that kind of omega; he never really got on with others like himself. Zac and Harper, though… he could picture them growing up together, thick as thieves.

  “That going to be a problem?” Harper asked pointedly.

  “Never. If ever there was a time for Zac to have a good friend at hand, I imagine this would be it. You’re welcome at the house anytime, Harper.”

  That seemed to be enough to mollify the protective omega. He sat back in his seat with a satisfied hum.

  The clinic parking lot wasn’t busy, so it didn’t take long to find a spot. Zac was looking a little gray by the time they reached the doors, and Beckett wasn’t surprised when the omega suddenly sprinted for the nearest bathroom, Harper on his heels. He watched after them, then decided to make himself useful, checking the omega in at the desk before heading for the nearest vending machine.

  When Zac came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, supported by Harper with an arm around his waist, Beckett had a bottle of water, a cup of tea, and some crackers.

  “The nurse said these will settle your stomach right down,” he said, holding out the crackers. “We’re just over here.”

  He led them to the waiting room. They sat together, and the only other couple in the room smiled over at them.

  “They think we’re a threesome,” Harper whispered loudly.

  “Harper!” Zac complained, half-laughing, half-exasperated.

  Beckett handed over the tea and the crackers, setting the bottle of water on the table next to them.

  “Do you need anything else?” he asked, pulling out a few napkins and a chocolate bar from his pockets.

  Zac stared at them and giggled. “I think you’ve covered every eventuality. Thanks.”

  Beckett tried to hide a smile, feeling his face flush. “I might have gone a little overboard. Sorry.”

 

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