by Kim Lawrence
‘You really do worry about family, don’t you? Well, relax—yes, I did have family.’ His lips curled in a cynical smile of remembrance. ‘An uncle who is now happily dead and a grandmother who is a great deal pleasanter now that she doesn’t remember my name, or, for that matter, her own.’
Shock reverberated through his body, none of it showing on his still shuttered face as he realised he had just revealed more to her than he had to another living person. Not even Alekis knew the details about his life before they had met, and here he was spilling his guts to this woman, with her ridiculous sentimentality, virtually inviting her to walk around in his head!
Was this a new symptom of sexual deprivation?
She looked at his bleakly beautiful face and felt her heart squeeze with sympathy. His comment had been sparing in detail, but you didn’t need to have worked with children caught in the firing line of family conflict to recognise that Zach’s childhood had not been what she’d imagined.
‘I’m so sorry,’ she said, wondering uneasily how many of her other assumptions about him were wrong.
‘There is no need to be sorry,’ he sliced back coldly. ‘It is the past.’
Did he really believe it was that easy? she wondered, remembering all the times when she was growing up that she had wished that her past were a painless blank. That she didn’t have the snatches of memories that made her sad, while filling her with a nameless longing.
Glancing at his shuttered face, she recognised that she had pushed him as far as she could on the subject. She changed tack. ‘So, what is your connection to Alekis?’
‘I wonder about that sometimes myself.’
Before she could voice her frustration at this deliberately unhelpful response, he added, ‘Your grandfather helped me when no one else would.’
‘So, a financial loan...?’ she probed.
His eyes were hidden by his half-lowered lids but the smile that quivered on his sensually sculpted mouth intrigued her. ‘Not as such, but I remain in your grandfather’s debt. I doubt very much if I would be where I am today without his intervention.’
‘Where would you be?’
‘I sometimes ask myself that, but not often. I prefer to deal with the here and now, and in the here and now I consider myself in Alekis’s debt.’
‘Do you like him?’
His dark brows drew together in a straight line above his aquiline nose. ‘He has many qualities I admire and many faults I accept.’ His dark eyes had a mesmeric quality as he captured her gaze and there was an intensity in his words as he spoke. ‘The door to the world you are about to enter is rarely opened to outsiders. I was an outsider, so maybe Alekis thought I was well placed to help your transition.’
‘So you’re not an outsider now?’
‘I have never been a joiner.’
Did he ever give a straight answer? she wondered. ‘But you want me to join.’
He shook his head. ‘That will be your choice. I want you to be aware of the pitfalls. To learn how to—’
‘Blend in?’
He gave a sudden laugh, deep and uninhibited. It melted his expression into a smile that made him look years younger and made the bottom of her stomach dissolve. She realised that if this man ever made the effort to charm there wasn’t a woman alive who could resist.
Including me!
Now there was a fact to keep her awake at nights.
‘What is so funny?’
‘The idea of you blending in anywhere.’ The laughter died from his face, leaving something much darker, much more intense, more dangerous, she realised, than mere charm. ‘You’re an exceptionally beautiful woman.’
His deep voice was like rumpled velvet, warm, sensuous and will-sapping. She had no idea how long she sat there staring at him before the blare of a car horn jolted her back to reality.
The reality being that Zach possessed a voice that really ought to carry a danger warning! Ah, well, the next time, should there be a next time, she would be prepared and not look like such an idiot.
She broke the seductive hold of his dark, mesmerising stare, though the effort filmed her skin with sweat as she snapped out contemptuously, ‘Don’t be stupid!’
Obviously she knew she wasn’t bad to look at, but exceptionally beautiful was not a term used for a woman who had a mouth that was way too big for her face, a gap between her front teeth and the sort of body that looked great in clothes but without them... She hated her bony collarbones and she didn’t see how anyone could consider the visible angles on her hips feminine.
Her reaction to him stating the obvious seemed strange. You could be excused for assuming, given her reaction, that no one had ever told her how beautiful she was before. Even if she had had lovers who left a lot to be desired, he thought scornfully, the woman had a mirror.
‘Even if you could blend in you shouldn’t. You should carry on being yourself, as much as is possible.’
She looked bemused by the advice. ‘Who else would I be? I think you worry too much. I’m used to being the odd one out. The kid in care with the wrong clothes.’
If the comment had been made in an attempt to garner sympathy, Zach would not have felt any. He did not want to now, and yet as he looked at her he experienced less sympathy but a sudden deep anger for the childhood she had been robbed of. And yet she seemed to have her own set of values that nobody had been able to take from her.
Could he say the same? Maybe she had come to terms with her past more than he had his?
He pushed the thought away; the past was something he did have to come to terms with. It was gone and buried. Not only could he not imagine himself discussing it so openly as she did, but he could not imagine wanting to.
CHAPTER SIX
‘YOU CAN OPEN your eyes now. We’re in the air.’
She did so, taking a breath and realising that at some point during the take off she had grabbed his hand and dug her nails in hard.
With a self-conscious ‘Sorry... ’ she released it, her brows twitching into a front of dismay as she saw the half-moon crescents standing out white in his olive skin. Pretending to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ears, she rubbed the skin of her cheek, which was tingling from the warm brush of his breath. It was scary that her body was so sensitive to him.
‘I’ve never been in a helicopter before.’
She just hoped the transfer would be as short as he had promised. Kat leaned forward in her seat to loosen the hair that had got caught down the neck of her sweater. As she leaned back, her glance connected with Zach’s.
The lurch in her stomach had nothing to do with their mode of transport as the moment that vibrated with unseen electricity stretched. He was sitting close enough for her to see the network of fine lines that fanned out from the corners of his eyes and the dusting of dark stubble shading his jaw, the shadow adding extra emphasis to the hollows of his cheeks.
She breathed a little deeper, unconsciously leaning forward as her nostrils flared, picking up on the clean male scent that rose from his warm skin. Sensations she had no name for shifted inside her and she paused, like someone standing on the edge of quicksand, fighting the urge to jump in with both feet.
Just before she reached tipping point, she jerked back again abruptly. The sudden adrenaline rush continued to make her head spin. She flexed her fingers before closing both hands tight, trying not to think of that unacknowledged moment when she had been within a heartbeat of reaching out and touching his cheek. It had been an instinctive thing. Kat would have been happier not knowing she possessed such instincts.
And much happier not having the image in her head of them lying naked together. Shame mingled with real fear as she dragged her eyes away from the firm sensual line of his mouth. Maybe there was a faulty gene responsible for being attracted to bad men...and she had inherited it? It had always been her secret fear.
Zach’s eyes were hooded as he watched her, reminding himself that the task assigned him by Alekis was keeping men out of her bed, not occupying it himself. It did not assuage the ache in his groin as he watched her pupils tellingly dilate until only a thin ring of amber remained.
The muscles in Zach’s brown throat rippled as he swallowed, his heavy lids lowered over his eyes as he turned his head to direct his hooded stare out of the window. He had not experienced this sort of elemental response to a woman in a long time and knowing she felt the same attraction, when they were sitting this close and she was looking at him with those hungry eyes, was not making his life any easier.
He closed his eyes to shut out the temptation, but the ache in his body did not diminish as he breathed his way through the hot elemental surge of raw desire that he had to endure because he sure as hell had no control over it.
Kat sat there, heart pounding, throat dry, wondering if he was going to acknowledge the crackle of sexual tension that shimmered in the air between them or even do something about it. Trying to decide if she wanted him to or not.
She was actually on the point of saying something, exactly what she didn’t know, when he closed his eyes, and within seconds gave the impression of man deeply asleep.
She had worked herself up into a state of breathless anticipation and he was asleep!
Her cheeks stung pink with mortified heat when she realised how close she had come to utterly humiliating herself. It had felt so real, so tangible. Had it really been in her imagination? she wondered, studying the strong lines on his face. Sleep had ironed out some of the austerity and hardness from his face and made him seem younger somehow.
It really was odd to find yourself attracted to someone you did not even like; in fact, actively disliked, she mused, suddenly sleepy herself as the tensions of the last few hours began to catch up with her. Perhaps the odd thing was that she had never felt this way before.
Or maybe she was just the oddity, a virgin because she’d never allowed anyone to get close enough to change the situation. There had been moments of uncomfortable self-awareness when she’d recognised that this was in part at least due to her deep-seated fear of abandonment, but it was an insight she pushed away.
The same way she’d been pushing away the glaringly obvious fact that she was attracted to Zach Gavros. Of course, denial had been a lot easier when she had been able to think of him as an arrogant two-dimensional figure, but getting a glimpse of his vulnerabilities was making that a lot harder.
Would these newly aroused feelings go back into hibernation once Zach vanished from her life?
Did she want them to?
* * *
Kat hadn’t worked out the answer by the time her eyelids flickered closed and did not lift.
She knew it was a dream—she’d had it before many times, but not for a long time now. The heart-thudding, stomach-clenching sense of icy dread. Except it wasn’t her—it was someone else she was watching, crouched small in her hiding place, waiting for the monster’s hand to reach in and drag her out. Kat wanted to shout a warning to the little girl, but her voice wouldn’t work. Her entire body felt paralysed. She was watching, waiting, helpless to stop what was about to happen.
I’m asleep...asleep...it’s not real. She kept repeating the words in her head, fighting her way through the grey layers of sleep to the surface. The process was all consuming, exhausting, then she heard a sound and focused on it, dragging herself clear of the shadows.
As she opened her eyes an indistinct face seemed to be floating there. She watched the outline grow more defined and more solid. Zach was leaning forward in his seat, talking to her.
‘We have arrived.’
She blinked, had a moment utter blank, before the memories all came rushing back. She pulled herself upright in her seat with a jerk. ‘Oh, God! I must have fallen asleep.’ She dragged her hands over her slippery, silky hair, anchoring stray tips behind her ears as she smoothed it.
‘You were dreaming.’
‘Was I?’ she said, thinking, You were watching me... and feeling quite extraordinarily exposed.
‘You don’t remember?’
He was looking at her with what felt like uncomfortable intensity. ‘Who remembers dreams?’ she said, turning her head to look out of the window, determined that whatever she saw, if her grandfather ate off gold plates and showered in champagne, she was not going to display unworldly awe. She’d show Zach she could pretend as well as anyone.
Her decision incinerated at her first glimpse of her new island home. Temporary home, reminded the voice of caution in her head.
It helped that their arrival coincided with the start of a breathtaking sunset, which, as they came in to land, had just tinged the water with feathers of red.
The landing strip seemed close to the candy-coloured village with terracotta roofs they had flown over, appearing to be cut into the rock of a peninsula that projected into the sea. She doubted her grandfather’s villa could be set anywhere more spectacular.
She glanced towards the backdrop of green mountains, looking for signs of a road that might lead to the villa.
‘Is it far?’ she asked, releasing her white-knuckled grip on the armrest and willing her stomach to stop churning as the helicopter set down and she released the breath held in her chest in a long sibilant sigh of relief.
He angled a questioning look at her face. ‘Far?’
‘To the house, villa, whatever—is it far from the village?’
An amused smile deepened the lines fanning out from his deep-set eyes. ‘There is no village.’
‘Town, then,’ she said, irritated by his pedantic response.
‘Not one of those, either.’
‘But...’ Her brows twitched into a frown. ‘I saw...’ Comprehension dawned and her eyes flew wide. ‘You’re telling me that was a house?’
The incredulous uplift of her voice on the word made his lips twitch.
‘But where are the people?’
‘There is a live-in staff, obviously.’
Still in shock, she watched as he turned to someone who had entered the helicopter; presumably the younger man had been waiting for their arrival. He tipped his head towards Kat and spoke at length in Greek with Zach, who responded in the same language, saying something that had the other man smiling and heading for the exit.
Zach turned his eyes, stilling on her averted face. She was struggling to loosen the clip on her safety restraint. A hank of hair had fallen across her face and he experienced the strangest impulse to push it back. Would the skin of her cheek be as smooth and soft as it appeared?
His hands clenched into fists as though they held the silky tendrils, before he brought the line of speculation to an abrupt halt. The fact that the questions had been there to begin with was a massive wake-up call. Just a warning; he was in control and in no danger of losing it now.
If the thought lacked conviction, he refused to acknowledge it. Admitting it would have meant acknowledging a chink in his armour.
Freeing herself after a tussle, Kat lifted her head and found he was looking at her with an intensity that made her stomach flip. For a moment the charge in the air, imaginary or real, was back, and it took her breath away before, heart thudding, she managed to lower her lashes in a self-protective shield. Had she imagined that moment? Had it been a creation of her over-heated imagination? Wishful thinking?
The sly whisper vanished like smoke but not before her spine had stiffened in utter rejection, that she would want to unleash anything in him let alone... A tiny little shudder showered through her body as she moistened her dry lips. It was ludicrous, more than ludicrous, she told herself firmly, laughable!
Only she wasn’t laughing.
‘Your grandfather bought the island in the sixties, I believe. At the time there was a church, a couple of houses, but the only occupants w
ere the goats. A goatherd came over from the mainland once every couple of weeks to tend them. So no evictions. The goats are still here too, but don’t try hugging them. They are feral creatures, not tame, so approach with caution.’
Kat stared at his face. In profile, there was a strength to the angles and planes that touched her now that she’d told herself it was a purely aesthetic level of appreciation.
Yes, he was beautiful to look at, but he was also not tame.
Luckily, she had never been drawn to the untamed, or unpredictable.
There you go with the denial again, Kat, taunted the voice in her head. Afraid you’ve got more of your mother in you than you admit to?
‘All right.’ She set her shoulders. ‘So what now?’
‘Now I escort you to the villa and introduce you to your new home.’
Standing up, her head ducked, she followed him towards the open doors.
CHAPTER SEVEN
THE TWO CARS, the first carrying the minimal baggage and the second themselves, drew up onto the illuminated forecourt. Night had fallen with a speed she found confusing, a clear starlit night scented with the smell of the sea and wild thyme.
Zach, who had gone around to open her door, left her to the assistance of the driver and moved forward to meet the woman who appeared in the massive set of double doors that were flung open to welcome them.
Dressed in a tailored black dress that suited her curvy figure, the woman was average height. It was hard to tell from this distance if the silver streaks in her dark hair were natural or a fashion statement. The chignon it was arranged in appeared as smooth and immaculate as the rest of her.
Kat felt travel-worn and untidy by comparison. She tucked the stray strands of hair behind her ears and told herself if she started worrying about what impression she made on everyone here she’d be a nervous wreck within the week.
Zach’s voice drifted across the space to Kat; it sounded warm.