I didn’t fall asleep until close to ten that morning, but it was okay because I didn’t have to be at work until five. I dreamed of Sparkles, dancing just for me, naked. But with each turn, twist, and leap, shadows covered parts of him. It was as if my brain wasn’t giving me permission to see him naked unless I got the okay.
At work I was distracted. I kept giving the wrong drinks to the wrong people and just couldn’t focus. Truth was, this was where the not feeling proud of myself part was kicking in. Should I not have googled? If Sparkles came in tonight, would he take one look at my face, point at me, and yell that he knew I’d cyberstalked him?
“Max, what’s up with you?” Atlas stood in front of me as I was heading to the other side of the bar. His whiskey eyes were narrowed, but the rest of him screamed that he was concerned.
“Just distracted is all.”
“That’s not like you; take a break and come with me.” He turned, not making it a choice. I let Shane know I’d be back and followed Atlas into his office.
“Sit,” Atlas said as he pointed to his couch. I did as I was told as he leaned against the front of his desk, arms crossed. “Talk.”
I wasn’t sure what to say. A million thoughts ran through my head, none sounding right. It all got jumbled and finally I just said, “I googled.”
Atlas’s brows shot to his hairline, and his mouth opened, but no words came out for a moment. “You googled, is that literal or some sick sort of—”
“Like on the computer, you perv.”
Atlas released a breath and came to sit next to me on the couch. “Start from the beginning, Max, ’cause I’m lost. You’re never distracted at work. Your job is art for you, and so many regular drinks are muscle memory. Yet you’re out there giving whiskey sours to people ordering Guinness.”
“Fine.” I went on to tell Atlas about driving Sparkles home, the studio, and then the googling.
“So, you went online and looked up the studio Sparkles told you he worked at, found out his name, and now what?”
I rolled my eyes. “I looked it up specifically to get his name. I had motive.”
Atlas chuckled. “Don’t you think Sparkles knew the possibility of you doing that?”
When Atlas said that, it made sense. Maybe Sparkles telling me he worked at the studio was some sort of mini olive branch.
“But should I tell him I know his real name?” I asked, wondering and hoping Atlas had some guidance for me.
“I think you honor the fact that he likes being called Sparkles and has never asked you to call him anything else. When I introduce myself to people as Mr. Durand, I’m not allowing them to call me Atlas.” He smiled at me and patted my shoulder. “You can tell Sparkles you know his real name if it helps you sleep at night, but respect his wishes if he asks you to not tell anyone, and to continue to call him Sparkles.”
“I can’t picture him as anyone else.”
Atlas nodded. “Yeah, me either.”
I didn’t ask Atlas if he knew Sparkles’s real name. I suspected he did—he knew a lot about the people in the club.
“Now, since I have you here.” Atlas stood and went over to his desk. “We’re doing a charity show for the LGBT Community Center.”
This was the first I’d heard about it. “Okay, um, when did this happen?”
“I got a call this morning from the director of the center. He asked if Joker’s Sin would do a charity show or something to raise money. Feels like a good idea. Great show and the center gets help.” He pulled out a blue paper. “I was just playing around with a few ideas for it. What do you think?”
“Drag and Drinks Charity Event at Joker’s Sin?”
“Has a good ring to it, don’t you think?”
It did, but I didn’t personally know any drag queens. I’d been to a few shows, but that was it. “Did you get some drag queens?”
He shook his head. “No, but I had an idea about that. I was hoping Sparkles would show up tonight—he’d be great with helping. So, if you see him, let me know. Otherwise, we can talk more about it tomorrow morning with Toby, Ledger, and Ciro.”
“Sure thing.” I handed him back the paper. “If it works, it sounds like a fun night.”
“Yeah, and I’ll need you to come up with a special drink for the evening. So, start getting creative.”
I smiled and was feeling a lot better when I left Atlas’s office. He was so much more than my boss—he was my friend, my brother. This place worked because he gave a shit about everyone here and when you were off, like I was tonight, he didn’t brush it away; he had to find out how to help. Joker’s Sin thrived because it was a life force for so many people, and we all wanted it to be the best place to let yourself be set free.
For the rest of the night, I didn’t screw up. Sparkles never showed but I figured, as he stated the night before, he had a life outside this place. I put it out of my head and focused on my job. I let Shane go early and told him I’d close.
“Hey, Max,” a gorgeous blond twink winked at me. “Can I have a blowjob?” I knew he meant the shot, but I also knew he meant a real one too.
“Hi, Jessy. Sure thing, coming right up.” I made his shot and brought it to him.
“Whatcha doing after work?” he asked as he dipped his finger into the shot and sucked on the digit.
“You mean who?”
He shrugged. “I could be the answer to the who.”
Normally, I’d tell Jessy to wait for me by my bike or to toss me his number and I’d text him when I was done but for some weird reason, I couldn’t find myself doing any of those things.
“Oh, Jessy, I’d love it to be you, but I gotta close tonight, and I gotta talk with the boss man.”
Jessy stuck out his bottom lip. “Poo. Well, rain check then.” He took the shot and was off to find someone else, I was sure.
What the fuck was wrong with me? I would normally fuck a guy like Jessy ten different ways before the sun came up. But for some reason, when I closed my eyes, all I could see was hot-pink hair and cyan eyes.
Chapter Eight
Lane
As I dressed in one of my favorite Armani suits for dinner at Vayne’s, I regretted telling Alexandra and Nolan they didn’t have to come for this. I told them to relax, that I’d figure out everything going on with this new landlord and such.
“I’ll be back in a little while, Tank. Eat your food, don’t chew on anything but your toys, for all that’s holy, would you?” He blinked and wagged his tail. Something of mine was going to be doomed.
I took the elevator down to the parking garage. I opted to drive myself as I would not be drinking and wanted to get out of this dinner as fast as possible. I got into my purple Jeep Wrangler, started it, and drove to Vayne’s.
The valet took my keys, and I relaxed a bit when I saw Earl and his wife, Betty, standing just inside the door.
“Hey there, Lane,” Betty said as she kissed my cheek.
“Hi, Betty, Earl.” I looked around. “Is no one else here?”
“They are,” Earl answered. “But I knew how worried you were about all this, so Betty and I decided to wait for you and walk into the party together.”
I would have hugged Earl if it wouldn’t be so strange to do so. “Thanks.”
Vayne’s was truly a stunning restaurant. It was like walking amid the stars. I could never describe it properly to people. The floor was black, but it glittered slightly, as if it was catching light. The owner, Xander Vayne, had the place set up so well that no one ever felt like they knew anyone else was dining there. It was amazing. Having never been to a private party here, I was slightly excited to see the room.
“Here we are,” Earl said as he held the door to the room open for me.
I looked around and saw a bunch of the tenants from my apartment building, which was strange. I saw Maude from the salon I knew Earl also owned. I went over to her, and we greeted each other. It felt like the hairs on the back of my neck were standing on end and when I turned, I saw
the four men from the other night, all watching me.
“You know them?” Maude asked.
“I saw them the other night, but no.” I didn’t like how they followed my every move. Something about this entire thing felt wrong.
“Come sit,” Earl said as he came over to me. I sat between him and Maude with Betty on Earl’s other side, and we waited for this mystery landlord guy.
A server took our drink orders. I just wanted water. It felt like my skin was crawling. I’d spent so many years of my life trusting my gut—it kept me alive and when it told me to run, I did. At that moment, it was shouting at me to get out of the restaurant. I was just about to excuse myself when the door to the room opened again, and it was like every nightmare I’d ever had came at me all at once.
Everyone has their very own Satan. The one person that has the power to make your life a living hell, and mine was a man named Dorian Birch. The very same man who walked into the room and whose eyes were locked on mine. And the smile of victory he wore felt like I was being flayed. He’d found me.
“Good evening, everyone,” Dorian said in a booming voice. While his smile made my insides turn acidic, everyone else was immediately enamored. I was like them once.
Dorian Birch wasn’t an ugly man. Just the opposite—he was stunning. I hadn’t seen him in seven years, but it was like he hadn’t even aged. He was fifty when I first met him…so pushing sixty now and still handsome. Easily six foot two, broad, salt and pepper hair, piercing blue eyes, and a smile that would melt anyone’s heart. Until you got to know him and saw the toxicity the man had running through his veins.
I was frozen in place as he walked around greeting everyone. I knew he was saving me for last. I knew this man so well. It was how I was able to escape him. It was how, until this very moment, I was able to hide from him. After the first few years, I figured he’d stop looking and maybe I got lazy, but I should’ve known better. This was Dorian Birch. He didn’t give up, and he never lost. I had bested him, and he couldn’t let that go.
When Dorian came over to our table, we all stood. He took his time talking to Maude, and I looked at the four men around him, and they all had smirks on their faces. There was no coincidence in any of this. Dorian had planned it all. This was his game; these were his players. I was outnumbered and had nowhere to go.
Finally, Dorian was in front of me, hand out. “Lane Ashley, is it?” I wanted to spit in his face and run more than I wanted to breathe at that moment.
“Lane?” Earl said, “You all right? You don’t look so good.”
“Um…” I cleared my throat. “Yeah, fine. Yes, I’m Lane.” I didn’t dare shake Dorian’s hand. I never wanted to feel his skin on mine again.
“Earl here was telling me you had some serious reservations about this business arrangement.” Our gazes met, and while he appeared jovial toward Earl, I saw the slight narrowing of his eyes and how he gritted his teeth. “We’ll talk after the dinner…alone.” He wasn’t asking—he never did.
“Unfortunately, I have somewhere else I need to be after this dinner.” I feigned disappointment.
“Pity.” He smiled. “Tomorrow is fine. I’ll meet you at the studio.” He didn’t wait for me to answer him; he moved on, and my stomach churned.
“You really don’t look well, dear.” Betty placed her hand on my forehead.
“I didn’t sleep well last night,” I said to her, then faced Earl. “Earl, don’t sign with him, please. I’m asking you to just trust me on this.”
“Lane, what are you talking about?” He turned toward Dorian, who was talking to my neighbor.
“If I told you Dorian would destroy all your buildings after you signed the papers, if you knew he had malicious intent, would you not sign?”
“You speak like you know him?” Earl said.
“I do. He almost ruined my whole life. Please, Earl, I’m begging you.”
“Oh, Lane,” Earl whispered. And I knew. I knew Dorian had managed to make Earl sign those papers before the dinner. Dorian wasn’t stupid. Once he and I saw each other, he knew I’d tell Earl not to sign. There was no question he’d sweetened the deal so much Earl couldn’t resist. “I’m sorry. He was just—”
“I know.” I held up a hand stopping Earl. “I know what he’s like.” I took my seat and Betty and Earl followed suit. Maude wasn’t paying us any attention.
“Earl, you said you’d wait,” Betty scolded.
“He offered an extra million, I…I’m sorry.” There was no hiding how sorry he felt.
Dorian sat down and as if he knew I was watching him, his eyes locked with mine, and the asshole winked. I wasn’t as discreet, as I gave him the finger. He just laughed and continued talking to Mary, who lived on the floor below me.
I wasn’t sure I’d be able to run from him again; it had taken everything just to get away from him the last time. I knew why he was angry. I knew he wanted everything I took from him and more. When I left, Dorian had no idea what I’d been planning; I’d had the upper hand. He was so lost in his own world and never thought in a million years I’d best him. I’d won, gotten away, something no one had ever done to Dorian before. It had taken me awhile to relax and not look over my shoulder every second. But it was his game now, and I wasn’t sure I’d win this time.
Chapter Nine
Max
“Drag and Drinks Charity Event?” Ledger asked as he looked over the paper from the LGBT Community Center Director. “This was your idea?” We were having our weekly meeting, which was the only day each week I had to get up early.
“Yes,” Atlas answered. “We’ve done shows before, but not this. It will draw in even more people, and we’ll have a cover charge that will go to the community center, and a percentage of drink sales too.”
I thought it was a great idea. Joker’s Sin was a pillar in Haven Hart, but some politicians and such snubbed their nose at the gay club. If it was seen as a place charity could make money, it might help keep the Karens off our backs. “It’ll be good for the club. And that center is great for LGBT kids.”
“Are we going to make it a habit of doing charity events?” Ciro asked, echoing my thoughts about other charities wanting in on this.
“No,” Atlas answered. “This center is a place a lot of us would have loved to have had when we were kids. So, let’s help it out.”
We all agreed and took some time to eat the fresh bagels and drink coffee.
“Max,” Atlas said just as I stuffed my mouth. “Since you know where Sparkles works, maybe you can go by there and see if he, and his dancers or whatever, want in on this. I know it’s a drag show, but he may have some ideas…Maybe he will even participate?”
I chewed as fast as I could and swallowed so hard it hurt. “Why me?”
Atlas shrugged. Fucking shrugged. “You know where he works.” He gestured to the room where Ledger, Ciro, and Toby were doing their best to hold back laughter. “None of us have ever been there.”
I chugged my lukewarm coffee and slammed the mug down on the table. “This is workplace abuse.” I didn’t know why I was protesting—he was giving me an excuse to see Sparkles. But, still. I had to sell this to a man who compared me to herpes.
“I want a raise.” I stood, grabbed the paper, and left the club to the sound of all of them laughing.
I wasn’t quite sure how to describe what I walked into when I stepped foot in Ashley’s Haven, but a bunch of tiny little humans tapping, horribly and not at all together, wasn’t it. In the middle of the terror tapping circle was Sparkles. He had a smile on his face and was trying to encourage the little monsters to count. A few were getting it, but most weren’t. One kid had two fingers up his nose, eyes closed, and was just jumping up and down. I wondered if standard drug testing was allowed for kids.
“Can I help you?” I turned toward the voice and saw a man staring at me expectantly.
“Oh, um. Sorry, I must look like a creeper, watching little kids,” I said, and then the guy’s smile dipped
, and I realized he probably wasn’t thinking that until I said it. “Shit.” Now his eyes widened, likely because I swore with little ears present. “My name is Max, I’m here for Sparkles.” This guy was inching toward the phone now, and if I didn’t explain he’d call the cops on me. “Lane, sorry, I’m here to talk to Lane.”
“I see.” He scanned me from head to toe, assessing, no doubt to see if I was stable. “He’s teaching right now.” The kids all stopped tapping when Sparkles blew a whistle. “But it’s ending, so have a seat over there, and I’ll let him know you’re here.” He pointed to a small area with chairs. A few parents were there, and I decided to just do as I was told, so I didn’t freak the poor man out anymore.
I sat in the room as parents gathered their children and left. I didn’t dare move, and I wasn’t convinced the cops hadn’t been called. I was about to text Atlas and tell him this was a bad idea when Sparkles walked out.
“Max?” He appeared confused.
“So you do know this man?” the one I terrified asked.
“Yes. Nolan, this is Max—he works at Joker’s Sin.”
Nolan nodded. “He’s odd.”
“Yes, well, he’s a lot of things.” Sparkles chuckled and Nolan walked away.
“Sorry to bother you at work,” I said as I stood and held out the blue paper. “Atlas asked me to stop by, see if you’d be interested in this and maybe some of your dance folks or whatever. Maybe you know people.”
He took the paper, a smirk on his face as he read it. “Wow, this is actually genius.”
“Yeah, well, anyway, you can let Atlas know or—”
“I’ll happily do it. I happen to know the perfect act for it, and I may know a few people who would want in…” He trailed off for a second. “There’s not a lot of time. But leave it with me, and I’ll see what I can do.”
To Die For (Joker's Sin Book 2) Page 4