by LJ Byrne
I have Brock drop me off at the Mavericks on his way to meet his band. I’m technically homeless myself since the cabin is a three-hour drive from the airport. Katrina thinks I should stay with her and Mason, which is certainly an option. I know Katrina isn’t home right now – she’s off with Bruce in New York City – and Mason is at a swimming camp for a few more days.
The staff at the house locate Lucas for me. I’m wearing a striped-denim overall dress that comes right above the knee. I’m not aiming for sexy– just comfort in the heat.
“Is this what you do all day, Lucas?” I ask drolly, sitting on one of the pool chairs near him. At least he’s developing a tan, I think to myself.
Lucas jerks upright, removing his sunglasses to peer at me in surprise. I can’t tell if he’s happy to see me. The last time we spent any real time together was at the end of year dance. I’d re-worn the red and gold dress from Christmas, and he stayed by my side all night. We danced, but there was a shadow on his face I couldn’t understand. It… bothered me more than I want to admit. He was unhappy – perhaps even unhappy with me. I couldn’t shake that it involved the Dollar Club – the most cringe-worthy club name ever – and his father.
“You’re back,” he says, trying to mask his shock at seeing me in the flesh. He’s wearing blue swim trunks that sling low over his hips. He swings his legs over so that he’s sitting, facing me, and his eyes dip to the necklace around my neck – the moonstone and sapphire necklace he gifted me. He’s blonder and his skin has a warm, golden glow from the summer sun. Without warning, he reaches out to touch my hair.
“I’ve been busy, but yes, I’m back,” I say, aware that I’m distancing myself from him with my actions and words. I’m… not sure if I can help myself.
Lucas stills, his gray eyes darkening. We’re awkwardly silent before he blurts out, “Why did you join the Club? You challenged my father. Why?”
“I told you I’m taking the Club down. They sanctioned what Vanessa did to me,” I say, crossing my arms defensively. “Your father is part of the Club. It wasn’t fair of your father to disown you and cut you off.”
“I don’t need you to fight my battles.” Lucas lowers his shades, turning away with a hint of anger.
I huff. “You can’t stand that I fixed everything.”
The way Lucas stiffens tells me he’s grossly offended. “You didn’t. You didn’t fix everything.”
I go over everything in my head. He’s completely wrong! Brock has his career back, Mason is back with his family, Lucas isn’t poor, Vanessa is gone, the Elites are broken. I know I have more to do, but I am changing the world as needed! “I haven’t overlooked anything.” Even the hiccups have been smoothed over. There’s so much more to do. “You’re acting like a child. I have things I’m doing, and I don’t have time to coddle you.” Even as I say it, I know I’m wrong. My behavior is wrong.
“That’s it, is it?” Lucas is both hurt and angry. “You think I’m wasting your time.”
“We talked every night and if your ego couldn’t handle me helping, you should’ve said it before I wasted time dealing with you.”
Lucas stands, fists clenched so hard that his knuckles are white. “I’m sorry I wasted your time. I clearly made—” He breaks off. “Excuse me.” Without saying anything further, he grabs his shirt and leaves.
What am I doing? Honestly, I don’t know anymore.
“I certainly don’t mind driving you around,” Jasper says as he drives his Bentley, “but it’d be easier if you’d just live with me, my love.”
I should feel bad. He picked me up after Lucas stormed off and then allowed me to sleep overnight at his rented home. Jasper got sick of not having his own place to retreat to so he’s renting a split-level condo about an hour away from the Mavericks. Although he was a perfect gentleman while I was there, I asked him to take me back to the Mavericks once Katrina and Mason were back. We’re still a week out from the first day of school, so Katrina suggested we come over for a mini-party and then attend her parents’ evening summer party.
When we arrive, I see the twins’ Audi and Brock’s Mercedes-Benz in the driveway. “Late to the party as usual,” Jasper notes cheerfully, but his cyan eyes regard me carefully. I suppose I haven’t been very chatty. In fact, I’ve been grumpy. I’m on a destructive path.
A part of me is annoyed that I’m attending parties. I’m still trying to get intel on key Club members, and then there’s the bet with Lucas’s father. My nails dig into my hand. My bet with Michael Rhodes doesn’t change anything I plan on doing.
My phone buzzes. It’s another text from my agent Lance Bell telling me I need to prerecord an acceptance speech if I win a new artist award. I grit my teeth. I want to fling my phone out the window.
Jasper pauses for a second before opening my door. In the sun, his ash-brown hair gleams with hints of gold. He is a striking individual. He and Lucas could vie for most handsome at our school and it would be a tie. He’s holding my bagged party dress in one hand as he helps me out with the other. “Elena,” he begins, and I note immediately that he’s using my name, not any of his nicknames for me, “you seem out of sorts.”
During the summer, I trimmed my hair further so now it swings just at my shoulder. For years, I had long hair that weighed me down. The shorter hair is freeing. “Out of sorts,” I repeat blankly. “I’m not out of sorts. I’m busy. Big difference, Jasper.”
With his height advantage, when he frowns, it’s quite daunting. Many people are intimidated by him. I’m not. “I’ve already asked you to share your burden with me. I’m here to help. You know that I have a particular skill set at your disposal.”
I want to laugh. Help? Yes, he helped save me while I was drowning. No, wait, that’s wrong. He got rid of Ben and Thomas. He and Lucas. “I know, I know,” I say, trying to temper my voice with patience, but it gets harder all the time. I can’t afford to be distracted now.
Before we even reach the doors, Katrina, wearing a pale yellow sundress, bursts through with a happy shout. “Saving the best for last, are we?” she says cheerfully, grabbing me into a warm hug.
I try to match her enthusiasm, but I falter when I see the crew of boys behind her. Katrina gives Jasper a quick squeeze and hands my dress over to someone. “Would you take those to the guest room next to mine, Matt?” she asks, not waiting for an answer.
Charles and Bruce put me in a twin-hug sandwich, and I begin to feel brittle at the edges. When Charles pulls back to look at me with his baby blue eyes, his lips thin briefly. Is he seeing the same thing Jasper sees? That I see?
Lucas gives me the barest of nods while Brock swings me around. I’m just about to hit Brock in the head when he releases me. “Sweetheart, you know they think our song is going to win ‘Single of the Year’? Do you think we should attend the show together?” He waggles his eyebrows. “There’s speculation that we’re dating secretly, you know. I’m willing to give it a go.”
“I’m not attending the show,” I say somewhat dismissively. “I don’t have time for that.”
“Whoa.” Brock puts his hands up in alarm. “Elena, your fans want to see you. You need to make time for your fans.”
Fans? My brain spins with thoughts of worshipping a false idol. Isn’t that what I am? I’m about to snap when Mason says, “I haven’t received my hug yet, Elena.” I manage another hug without losing it. I’m… brittle.
Katrina links her arm through mine, and it takes me a moment to remember that we did it all the time at school. “Come on, let’s go and grab beverages,” she says, her smile warm and soothing. I cling to that familiarity.
She takes us over to the pool, yelling over her shoulder to the boys that they can change if they want to. She pours two glasses of lemonade and hands one to me, gesturing with her head to follow her away from the pool.
Once we’re out of earshot, her face grows serious. “Elena, I know you stopped by here to visit Lucas earlier. What happened?” Her brown eyes are full of worry. Sh
e scrutinizes everything about me. “You look good, but you also look stressed.
“Nothing. He’s just upset that I took care of everything.” I take a long sip of the lemonade. This is good lemonade.
“Are you sure that’s it?”
I glance at her in surprise and then laugh. “Yes, it’s obvious.”
Katrina is silent for a bit. “He called you every night while you were touring.” When I nod, she glances at me. “You never called him.”
I almost choke on my drink. I mean, I was busy with rehearsals. I was working!
“Don’t get mad, but where are we in your life?” When I look confused, she explains gently, “Have you ever thought that maybe Lucas needed to know if you wanted to hear his voice as much as he wanted to hear yours?”
I’m temporarily speechless. Did I want to hear from him? “There was an open invitation,” I finally say, trying to hide my turmoil.
“Or you could have invited him.” Katrina waits for me to think about it. “I think—I think you have feelings for Lucas. You might even have feelings for Jasper. But right now, it’s a one-way street.”
“I’m busy,” I snap, frustrated with the conversation. “I didn’t even want to come to this party. I have far too much to do.”
Katrina recoils like I’ve slapped her. “Elena, you’re barely eighteen. What is going on that you don’t have time for us? For your friends?”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, regret clear in my voice and face. “I don’t – I don’t know what’s wrong. I feel like I’m on the edge of a precipice.” I groan. “Too many metaphors.”
Katrina’s concern is palpable. I find myself on uneven ground and I don’t know how to explain to her what’s happening. “We’re here for you, Elena,” she murmurs. “When you’re ready, we’re here. But don’t push us away.”
I bend my head. “I-I don’t know what’s wrong.” I bite my lip. I won’t – I can’t be weak. “I’m tired.” Even admitting that much feels like defeat. When I look at Katrina helplessly, she presses a hand on my arm. For some reason, it makes me want to weep.
By the time the evening party begins, I’m reeling from a headache. I down some ibuprofen before I slip on a sleeveless fuchsia velvet midi dress with a heart-shaped neckline. Katrina comes in while I apply a minimal layer of makeup.
“Oh, pretty!” she says, sophisticated in a white pencil-cut halter sleeve dress. The cut of her dress is elegant, and she’s gone with classic red lipstick to offset the white dress. “Come on, I know the boys will want to see you.”
I roll my eyes. “You know that Bruce only has eyes for you.” She giggles at my comment.
As expected, Bruce is floored at how beautiful Katrina looks, even pretending to be jealous when Charles spins her around. She then tells Bruce he is at least five percent more handsome than Charles.
Brock whistles at me appreciatively, coming over to put his hands on my hips. He leans over to whisper, “If I thought I had a chance with you still, I wouldn’t let you out of my sight in this dress.”
If he still could make my heart flutter, I’d admire him in his pale linen pants and button-down white shirt. But neither he nor Mason have that effect on me. Mason’s wearing a similar outfit, but his pants are a shade darker. Jasper is the only one not wearing a button-down shirt, but he pulls off his off-white coat with a deep blue shirt with such flair that he looks just as good. Jasper doesn’t make my heart flutter, but he does affect me more than I want to admit. When I finally look at Lucas, I’m not surprised that he looks the most polished. He’s wearing a light gray suit that would be rather formal if he had a tie on. His pale blue silk shirt is unbuttoned at the top so that a hint of his newly tanned skin peeks through.
“I do hope there’s dancing,” Jasper says with a grin. “You look delicious.”
“Ugh, that’s so cheesy,” Katrina complains. “Come on, Mason, we need to help Mom greet the guests. The rest of you mingle.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Bruce teases, faking a salute.
Charles snags two glasses of champagne from a tray and hands one to his twin. He quirks his brow in question to me, but I shake my head. “You okay?” he asks quietly.
“I have a little headache.” I fake a smile.
“You look exhausted.”
“I know.” I take a breath because the words came out sharply.
Charles murmurs, “Don’t let your desire for justice destroy who you truly are, Elena.”
I blink back tears. “I know,” I whisper. But I can’t let go, can I? Not when I’m so close.
“Oh, my God,” someone gasps, and I turn around to see a girl I don’t know. “You’re BSGirl.” She gives a little clap, hopping excitedly. “Can I get a selfie with you and Brock Caruso?”
My knees almost buckle for some reason, but Brock grabs me firmly around the waist and I manage to smile for the picture. The girl starts babbling about my songs and my head is ready to explode. My fingers dig into Brock’s arm.
Without thinking, I reach out. “I need fresh air,” I whisper, turning away from the senseless chatter.
A warm arm detangles me from Brock and I’m ushered outside. The sun still hasn’t set yet and the world is painted in hues of yellow and orange. I finally look up at Jasper, blinking at him in confusion.
His voice is low and rough when he asks me if I’m okay. I nod, striving for calm. “I feel like I’m lost.” I try to laugh, but he holds me tightly to him.
“Elena, you can tell me anything. You know that, right?” Jasper lifts my chin with two fingers, forcing me to look at him.
“I know.” That brittle feeling gets worse and I briefly sag against him. “I don’t know what’s wrong. I’m restless. I feel like I haven’t done enough. I can’t stop moving or thinking.” Some of my panic seeps into my voice.
Jasper curses softly. “You need to stop for a minute and take a step back. Don’t you get it? You’ve won.”
I rest my head against his chest, feeling the reassuring heartbeat in my ears. Have I? What have I won? When my eyes focus, I see Lucas watching us, his eyes burning. He walks away without saying anything.
I step back, my body stiffening. “I don’t know anymore.”
Jasper runs his hands down my arms. “Think for a moment. Don’t forget who the real enemy is and who you are, Elena.”
Stunned, I look at him. “What do you mean?”
“I’ll always be there to catch you if you fall. I’ll do whatever you want because I’m sworn myself to you. But I’m not the only one who will do whatever you ask. If you’re not careful, you’ll hurt everyone who loves you along the way.” His hands squeeze gently. “All I’m asking is that you take a step back to look around you. I’m as selfish as the next person, but I also know that I value your happiness over mine.”
I can’t speak. I rest my head against him again, exhausted. He holds me gently until Katrina finds us to rejoin the party.
CHAPTER 3
Fourth-year uniforms are like second-year uniforms except the bottoms are navy blue. Girls skip the jacket and wear white shirts with blue skirts. Ties are mandatory for girls and boys. Boys wear navy blue jackets and pants with white shirts.
“We should think about where we want to go to college,” Katrina says, “maybe even stick together.”
Our arms are linked as we walk with Jasper, Bruce, and Charles. The other boys are meeting us in the dining hall for breakfast. When we enter the hall, I stumble and its only Katrina’s arm that keeps me up long enough for Charles and Jasper to steady me.
Lucas, Mason, and Brock are sitting at the table with Vanessa Valentino, Astrid Fleming, and Kiana Shimura standing close by. Ashley Witt, who was expelled last year, is sitting in Lucas’s lap. For a moment, I’m having déjà vu. And then I see the irritation on Lucas’s face as he barks something at Ashley. Mason and Brock are in the process of standing, telling Vanessa something angrily.
Lucas sees me as he stiffens and shoves Ashley off his lap. But I swear there’s a
hesitation. Is it real or is my mind playing tricks on me?
Ashley makes her way towards me, pale and anxious, wobbling on her pencil-thin legs. “Elena, I just want to apologize for my behavior. I got sent to a treatment center and I’m grateful I did.” She tentatively smiles at me. “I didn’t realize what a hold the drugs had on me.”
“You and your bitch friend nearly burned her to death!” Charles snaps from behind me, the memory of the incident fresh in his brain. I’m grateful for his loyalty.
I can’t even speak. She isn’t supposed to be here. Jasper dealt with Ashley and I removed Vanessa from the Club. How is it that all the girls are here together again? I’m still on uncertain ground.
Vanessa says with a saccharine smile, “That’s all in the past. Now that we know she’s Elena Spark, why she’s the Elite of the Elites.”
“There are no Elites,” I say in a low voice.
Ashley licks her lips nervously, her eyes going from me to Vanessa. “I just want to say I’m sorry. And of course, I will respect any rules you set down. I mean, you’re rich and famous. You’re BSGirl and Elena Spark.” Her laugh grates on my nerves. I clench my hands so I don’t hit her.
“You’re one of the girls who kicked her in second-year,” Jasper says softly, his voice laced with venom.
Ashley grows even paler. Even Vanessa backs up a step at the violence in Jasper’s voice. Vanessa’s voice is high and nervous when she says, “Well, Elena is now truly the Queen. We have no argument with her.”
The Elite girls are standing together. Here. In front of me. Why did Lucas have Ashley on his lap? On his lap. I mean, he pushed her off, but I’m mad. Pissed. I can’t seem to get my brain to focus.
Jasper, sliding a glance at me, smiles coldly at Vanessa. “I think you should leave before my queen decides to have the other students rip you apart. How kindly do you think they’d feel if they knew you nearly killed her twice and tried to have someone assault her?”