“Yet you’re here now.”
A pressure built in Josh’s chest. He swallowed around the lump in his throat. “Yes.”
That was all he could say before talking to Hope.
“My sister is fragile.”
Josh stared at her brother in disbelief. “She’s the strongest woman I know.”
“You didn’t know her long.” Von sounded defensive.
Josh shook his head. “You’ve known her your whole life, and you have no idea what she’s like.”
“That’s not true.”
“Did you know your sister flew to Nashville to pick up a painting she’d done? The couple had bought five of her pieces. All but one was destroyed in a house fire. They asked her to restore it, and out of the kindness of her heart, she agreed even though she hadn’t painted in two years.”
“I knew she was going.”
“Did you know she comforted the couple, hiding her own pain that some of her cherished artwork was gone forever?”
Von wouldn’t meet his gaze.
“You make fun of how she earns a living without knowing how painstakingly she creates each favor. How she prepares for every event with the same energy and care she would for her own, simply because she finds her own happiness by making each couple’s wedding day dreams come true.”
“I was joking.”
“You sure about that?”
Von’s face reddened. “She knows I’m kidding.”
“Did you know she didn’t want to let me go, but she did because it was what I needed for my sobriety? Even when she didn’t understand my addiction, she accepted me and showed me compassion when I couldn’t find any for myself.”
Von didn’t say anything.
Good… because Josh wasn’t finished. “The same as she’s done for you, Von. Your sister is strong enough to step out of the way to let you find your own happiness. She never wants to hold you back. Hope feels genuine joy for you and your girlfriend, no matter how lost or heartbroken she might have been. That kind of selflessness takes strength. There’s nothing fragile about Hope. Nothing at all.”
Von’s mouth slanted, but he stepped aside. “If she ends up in tears, I’ll hurt you. Bad.”
Josh’s nerves ramped up. Sweat dripped down his back. But that didn’t stop him from crossing the threshold into the house. “If that happens, go ahead because I’ll deserve it.”
In the studio, Hope washed her hands after taking care of the brushes. She’d been working on restoring Cami and Dan’s painting, taking her time to get it right.
So far, so good.
Hope had missed the smell of oil, paint, and turpentine, but having the scents in the studio again was like inviting old friends for a visit. Only, these friends wouldn’t be leaving.
She scrubbed her hands, but not all the paint was coming off. Tired, she fought the urge to stretch. That would get water on the floor. She’d been up before the sun, spending time outside sketching various cottages down the road before working on the painting. No sense making more of a mess when it was time to quit for the day.
She was ready to close the door to her studio. Overdoing only led to a sore back, exhaustion, and a worried brother. Because of that, she’d agreed with Von to set a time to work and a time to stop each day. Sometimes she succeeded.
Like today.
That meant a reward.
A piece of berry pie at Sweet Caroline’s Cafe sounded good. She would text Paula. See if she could leave work early and meet her. Her friend loved her job but worked too hard.
“Hope.”
A shiver shot down her spine. It didn’t stop until reaching her toes. Hope didn’t have to turn around to know Josh was here. She would recognize his voice anywhere. With a deep breath to calm herself, she shut off the water, dried her hands, and faced him.
He stood in the doorway, wearing cargo shorts, a T-shirt, flip-flops, and a worried expression.
Her pulse kicked up a notch. Okay, three.
Hope raised her chin. She couldn’t tell if she was smiling or if her expression looked as stunned as seeing him made her feel. “You came back.”
Her voice was barely above a whisper. She hadn’t asked a question—or said anything eloquent—but it was the first thing she’d thought to say.
“I have to be in Atlanta this weekend for a game. I thought I’d stop by before flying there.”
His words sank in. That meant… “You’re back to broadcasting.”
“We’re doing exhibition games this month. It’s good to be in the booth again.”
This was what Josh needed to get his life back on track. “Wow. That’s great.”
He took a closer look at the painting she’d been trying to repair. “Thanks for the watercolor.”
“You’re welcome.” Jenny had told Hope how affected Josh had been by the gift, but she’d never expected him to return to Indigo Bay. “That watercolor got me painting again. It was if a switch was flipped back on. I’m grateful to you for helping me find that missing piece of my life.”
His face softened. “We both helped each other.”
She nodded.
An awkward silence fell over the studio. She couldn’t allow it to continue. “Things going well for you besides work?”
Josh’s shoulders pushed back. “Almost thirteen months sober.”
Pride for him rushed through her. “Congrats.”
“I never want to drink again, and I’m doing everything I can to make sure I don’t. But it’ll always be something I have to work at.”
A new strength shone in Josh. Not only strength but also understanding. He’d finally accepted himself and his situation. “We made the right decision in June.”
“I know.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “All I’ve thought about lately was seeing you again, but now that I’m here the words won’t come.”
Her gaze on his, she took a step forward but forced herself to stop even though all she wanted to do was comfort him. She still needed to look out for herself. “You don’t have to say anything.”
“Yes, I do.” The longing in his eyes made her want to turn back the calendar to mid-June. “I miss you, Hope.”
Her heart lurched. She’d survived his leaving once, but she didn’t want to put herself through that again. “Josh…”
“Do you miss me?” The words sounded unsure, a little desperate, so unlike the confident man who had spoken a few seconds ago.
A lump burned in her throat. She swallowed around it. “Yes, but I don’t think—”
“I was wrong.” He cut the distance between them in half. “About you. Us.”
She wrapped her arms around her stomach. “No, you weren’t. I did some research. Learned about neurosciences and addiction. Dopamine pathways—”
“I wasn’t trading one addiction for another.” He continued toward her. “No matter how hard I tried to tell myself what I felt was due to brain chemistry or another addiction, the feelings were real. But it took me a while to get there. To trust myself about what I felt because I’d never felt this way about anyone before. I was confused. Scared. Needed to figure things out. Work on myself so I’d be good enough for you.”
“I don’t understand.” She stepped back until her backside hit the sink.
“I don’t deserve you. I’m not sure I’ll ever be in a place where I will. For all my good intentions, there’s the chance I may relapse. I’m not a good bet for the future.” His gaze remained locked on hers. “But I want you. I’ve never stopped wanting you.”
Her heart thudded. She thought it might explode out of her chest. “I-I…”
“It’s your turn not to say anything.” As his thumb rubbed along her jawline, a burst of heat rushed through her. “I’m not talking about wanting sex, Hope. I’m talking about wanting you. I haven’t seen you in over two months, but my feelings have only gotten stronger. Deeper. I want all of you. Heart, body, and soul. But I don’t need you to complete me. I need you to enhance my life. I love you.”
She wanted to believe him, but a part of her was scared. “You love me?”
“Yes, I love you.”
The words wrapped around her heart like an heirloom quilt, taking away her fear and making her want to risk it all. Especially if that meant him declaring his love over and over again.
“You’re intelligent, caring, and the kindest woman I know. I respect you so much. When you saw the good in me, I tried to see it, too. And somewhere along the way of falling in love with you, I learned to love myself.” Josh’s lips curved into a charming smile meant only for her. “I have a long way to go on this journey, but I want you by my side.
“Oh, Josh. I love you.” Laughter bubbled over. She wondered if her feet still touched the floor. “I told myself that was the last thing I wanted, but then I met you. I’m not sure how it happened so fast, but it did. And I wanted to forget all the bad stuff that had happened in the past. When you left, I couldn’t stop crying.”
Josh cupped her face. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”
“I know, but I also knew saying goodbye was the right thing for you and for me.” She leaned into his hand. “You aren’t like the others. When most people look at me, they see an artist barely hanging on, trying not to fall apart, but not you. You saw something more. A strong, capable woman.”
“That’s what you are.”
“It’s what I wanted to be, and you helped me realize I was.” A sigh welled inside her. “After you left, I spent a few days throwing myself pity parties, but that was all. It still hurt, and I missed you, but I didn’t give up. Not like I did with Adam. I couldn’t because I wanted to remain strong. For you and for me.”
“You’re incredible.”
He lowered his mouth toward Hope’s. His lips pressed against hers.
Soft, caring, home.
That was what kissing Josh felt like.
His taste was the same as she remembered, but the sense of urgency she remembered was gone. His lips lingered and caressed as if they had all the time in the world.
He backed away. “I needed that.”
Her lips tingled. “Me, too.”
Josh hadn’t let go of her, and she was thrilled he hadn’t. “So many things are keeping us apart—distance, our families, my job, your painting, my sobriety—but I don’t care. I want to make this work.”
“So do I.” A newfound certainty glowed inside her. He was everything she wanted. It wouldn’t be easy, but life wasn’t meant to be. “I’m not the same woman I was when I got divorced. I can’t fix you or save you, but I can love and support you through the good and bad times. The distance now doesn’t mean forever, but as long as we have each other, we can do this.”
“We’ll go slow. Given how we started off, though, that might be a good thing.” He brushed his lips over hers. “I won’t let anything come between us.”
“Neither will I.” A kiss was her promise to him.
“I want us to take our time, but I also want you to know I’m committed to you.” He removed a pretty blue box from his pocket. “This is for you.”
Hope opened the lid. Inside was a fabric pouch of the same color. She pulled out a silver chain.
A solitaire diamond ring hung on the necklace.
Her jaw dropped. “I…”
“I’m serious about wanting more, but we both need time. I’d like to put this around your neck today for you to wear as a sign of my commitment to you. And one day, when we’re both ready, I promise to go down on one knee, ask for your hand in marriage, and place the ring on your finger.”
“I-I…”
“Is that a yes?”
She nodded, turning her back to him and lifting her hair off her neck.
He undid the clasp, put the necklace on her, and then moved in front of her to arrange it. “There. It fits you perfectly.”
“Beautiful.”
He stared at her. “Yes, you are.”
Heat flooded her face.
“There’s the blush I missed.” Affection filled his eyes.
“Thank you.” Hope rested her head against his chest. She blinked back tears. “This is so much better than any dream.”
“It’s only the beginning, Hope.” He kissed her. “Our new beginning. Wait and see. There’s so much more ahead of us.”
EPILOGUE
A year and a half later…
People packed the art gallery in Berry Lake, Washington, including Josh’s family, Von, and Hope’s parents, who had surprised her earlier at dinner. She was thrilled to have everyone here on the opening night of her exhibit, but that didn’t stop her from hiding away in an alcove with a large sculpture standing on a pedestal.
She couldn’t decide if the figure was supposed to be a gorilla or Sasquatch. Given the town’s love and obsession with Bigfoot, she’d go with the latter.
“Hope you don’t mind the company, Squatchy,” she said to the statue. “I need a break.”
She wiped her sweaty palms on her navy floral-print maxi skirt. The urge to peek around the corner where her paintings hung was strong, but one painting had sold—success! woohoo!—so she forced herself not to look to see if a sold sticker had been added to any more of them.
Not that she’d expected to sell anything tonight. She was stunned to have paintings on display somewhere outside of the gallery in Indigo Bay.
You have to start somewhere.
That was what Josh had said when Sal, the Berry Lake gallery owner, had approached her about selling the pieces she worked on when she visited Berry Lake. Sal had known all about Hope, but her past hadn’t deterred him. With Josh’s support, she’d said yes.
And here she was. “Trying not to freak out.”
At least the statue didn’t talk back.
“Hey, I’m usually the one hiding at these things.” Jenny O’Rourke pulled Hope out of the alcove. The author wore an empire-waist dress that didn’t quite hide her baby bump. “Tonight is not the time to be shy. Go mingle so everyone can tell you how talented you are.”
Hope appreciated the words, but she wasn’t a hundred percent comfortable here. What happened with Adam was in the past, but a few lingering fears about being featured in a show remained. Josh knew and understood, but others didn’t. “I needed a minute.”
Jenny grinned. “It’s been ten.”
That brought a smile. “Spying?”
“Writers have mad observation skills,” Jenny joked. “But Josh asked if I’d seen you. He’s worried this is too much for you.”
Hope pushed back her shoulders. “I’m still here.”
“Hope,” Josh called, relief in his voice. “I’ve been looking for you.”
“Glad you found her.” Jenny winked. “I’m going to find Dare. See you later.”
Josh’s blue eyes studied Hope. “You okay?”
She nodded but took a step back toward her new BFF Bigfoot. “Hanging out with Squatchy.”
He raised an eyebrow, giving her his tell-the-truth look.
“I told you I would feel weird being here,” she admitted.
He pulled her into his arms. She rested her head against his chest.
“And?” he asked.
She sighed, knowing he wouldn’t judge her. If anything, he’d make her feel better. “I keep waiting for…”
“Something bad to happen,” he finished for her. He brushed his lips over her hair.
“Maybe I am crazy.”
“Not crazy. You’re an artist having a show. You’re allowed to be emotional.” As he held her against him, he rubbed her back. As usual, the tension seeped away with each touch of his hands. “But nothing bad will happen. Everyone you love and who loves you is here.”
She combed her fingers through his hair the way she knew he liked. “I want to believe that, but only one painting has sold tonight.”
“Then the other buyers haven’t arrived,” he said as if it wasn’t a big deal. “You saw Sal’s smile when he put that first sold tag on. He’s thrilled to feature you. He’s salivating to see what y
ou’re working on next. So am I.”
She put up her hands. “Not until it’s finished.”
“Something else is bothering you.”
Josh knew her so well. Hope might as well tell him. She couldn’t keep anything from him. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“Oh, baby.” He kissed her. “That isn’t going to happen. In case you forgot, I’m the screwed-up one in this relationship.”
Things weren’t perfect between them, but they were better than Hope imagined they’d be. Josh was sober. She was painting. Life was good.
She kissed him. “You’re my muse.”
“And you’re my Hope.” He glanced around. “I was going to do this later tonight, but now seems like the right time.”
“What?”
He dropped to his knee. “Hope Ryan, you’re everything I didn’t know I needed in my life. You’re my first thought in the morning. My last one at night. I want to spend every day with you. Will you marry me?”
Her hands covered her mouth. She struggled to breathe. “Oh, oh, yes. I’ll marry you.”
Josh stood. “I need to take off your necklace.”
She’d worn her hair up, so that made it easier. Her heart raced.
He removed the ring and then clasped the chain around her neck again. Good, she’d gotten used to wearing it.
Josh slipped the ring onto her finger. A perfect fit. “I have no idea where this journey will lead us, or where we’ll end up living—in Indigo Bay, Berry Lake, or somewhere else—but you’re the only one I want by my side as we find out.”
Her heart swelled with affection for this imperfect man who was trying his best. “I love you.”
“And I love you.” He kissed her. “I will always love you, Hope.”
* * * * *
I hope you enjoyed Sweet Beginnings. I’ve wanted to write Josh’s story ever since I mentioned him in my novella Jenny (Jenny and Dare’s story) available at melissamcclone.com/jenny. If you want to read about Mitch and Lizzy Hamilton (and get an update on Jenny and Dare), check out my short read Sweet Holiday Wishes available at melissamcclone.com/sweet-holiday-wishes.
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