“Yep.” He stood, still holding the little girl to his chest.
“Can I have one too?” Chris said.
“Blue or red?”
“Red.”
Mark huffed out a breath, and Ollie saw him on his Grandpa Scott’s lap, blinking back tears. Scott leaned down and whispered something to him.
The house was bursting with people. Jena’s parents. Ollie’s grandparents. Jena’s kids and Allie’s friends. Ted’s mom had come over, along with Alex’s mother and grandmother. The busy hum surrounded him.
Ollie passed Alex and Sean coming out of the kitchen, and he suddenly realized why Allie had been so insistent that everyone come to the house.
Love surrounded him. Pressed into him. He could feel the weight of it like one of the heavy, pieced-together quilts his yaya made. Parents and grandparents. Children and friends. His cousin Paul had even brought Ollie’s dog over to the house, and Murtry planted himself at Allie’s feet.
“Ollie?” Loralie whispered into his shoulder, her thumb still in her mouth.
“What’s up, baby girl?”
“Will you stay here when I go to bed?”
“If you want me to.”
She draped her little arms around his neck. “Can you be your bear?”
“Yep.”
So apparently he was staying the night in Allie’s living room in his shifted form. He’d had stranger requests.
He grabbed two Popsicles, making sure one was red and one was green, Loralie’s favorite. Then he carried her past all the grandmas and back into the living room, settling next to Allie again.
“I’m staying the night,” he said, handing the red Popsicle to Chris. “Lala wants the bear.”
Allie nodded. “Okay then.”
“Mama,” Chris asked. “Was daddy a coyote when he died? Did someone hit him with their car?”
Allie’s eyes went wide. “No, buddy. Why would you think that?”
“I saw a coyote when I was driving to Indio with Grandpa. It was dead like Bandit, and I wondered if it was daddy.”
Allie sucked in a sharp breath, and Ollie grabbed her hand.
“That wasn’t Dad, stupid,” Mark said. “That was just a dumb regular coyote.”
“Marky,” Allie’s dad said, brushing the boy’s hair back from his eyes. “Remember what I told you.”
Mark crossed his arms and settled into sullen silence again while Chris and Loralie ate their Popsicles. Ollie heard Kevin sigh deeply and lean his head against the wall.
Low tugged on his sleeve and said, “Hey, let’s go outside.”
“Okay.”
The older boys left, and then the adults began to disperse, but nobody went home. Ollie smelled food drifting in from the kitchen and someone put some quiet gospel music on the radio. Pretty soon, Loralie was wiggling off his lap and asking Jena if she could play with the baby while Chris asked Caleb if he wanted to shoot Nerf guns. Mark went to the boys’ room with Bear. Ted came in the room and refilled everyone’s iced tea.
Ollie put his arm on the back of the sofa, and Allie leaned into his side.
“He wanted to play Nerf guns,” she said to Ted.
Ted crouched down next to her. “Children process grief differently.”
Caleb, who had probably dealt with more grieving families than any of them when he was working as a homicide detective, moved closer to Allie and Ted.
“It’s going to come up at odd times,” he said. “Kids don’t always recognize what they’re feeling.”
“Loralie hasn’t sucked her thumb in years,” Allie murmured.
“She wanted me to stay the night here,” Ollie said. “As a bear.”
Ted smiled. “Bears are so cuddly.”
“And scary,” Allie said, nudging his side. “Sometimes it’s good knowing there’s something scary guarding the door.”
“It’s good she felt comfortable asking Ollie to stay,” Caleb said. “She knows the adults around her are dependable. Allie, I am worried about safety though. The papers will get ahold of Joe’s name tomorrow. We don’t know why he was murdered, or if anyone is still—”
“Are they sure he was?” Ollie asked.
Ted nodded. “They found blunt-force trauma to his skull, but also a rib that was cracked. They missed it on the first pass, but Larry is fairly sure it was broken by a bullet.” She glanced at Allie. “Is this too much?”
Allie took a deep breath. “No, it’s fine. I’m kinda… I knew it was him, Ted. I knew.”
“I think the older boys did too,” Ollie said. “And Caleb, we’re watching the house.”
“By ‘we,’ you mean—”
“Bears.” He nudged Allie’s knee with his. “It’s good to have something scary guarding the door, remember? My clan is around. No one’s gonna touch the kids.”
EVEN when night fell, it seemed that Allie’s house was still surrounded. Tom and Cathy had driven their motor home over and parked it so Allie’s dad could stay the night. Ollie’s cousin took his grandparents to his house, leaving Ollie in the living room staring at a tiny girl in a princess nightgown who was holding a green stuffed dinosaur and staring at him with large blue eyes while her mother oversaw the boys getting ready for bed.
“What?” he said. “Now?”
She nodded, her thumb in her mouth.
“Okay, well…” None of the rooms in Allie’s house were big enough to shift in except the living room, and he didn’t want to strip down to his skin in front of a five-year-old.
He held up a hand. “I’ll be right back.”
Ollie went out to the front porch and off to the side yard, undressing quickly and stowing his clothes on a porch chair. He shifted, his body growing and flowing into his natural grizzly form, the hump rising on his back, his paws spreading to the size of dinner plates. He was the largest bear in his clan; he could hear the smaller creatures in the desert night skittering away when they scented him.
Senses keener, he did one wide circuit around the house, running in a burst of speed to work off some of the tension from the day. Then he shook off as much dust as he could and walked to Allie’s house, climbing the porch and scratching low on the door where Ollie could see other animals had scratched before him. Allie’s and Kevin’s foxes. Joe’s coyote. Even Ted’s cougar.
Allie opened the door. “This must be the bear she’s insisting on before she goes to bed.”
He grunted and squeezed through the door, only to see Loralie still standing with her dinosaur, her thumb in her mouth.
She grinned behind her thumb and held out her arms. “Up.”
Allie sighed. “Do you mind?”
Ollie lowered himself to the ground, and Allie lifted Loralie onto his back, settling her to sit just behind his hump. He felt her tiny hands tangle in his fur and knew she’d hold on. He lumbered down the hall and into the room decorated with mermaids and princesses, with a few random dinosaurs thrown in. Or were they dragons? He grunted and leaned against her little bed; Loralie scrambled onto the mattress and bounced a little, still grinning.
“Can you stay in my room, Ollie?”
Noooo. He had visions of waking up with pink ribbons in his fur and a tiara perched between his ears.
“No, baby.” Allie tucked her under the covers. “Your room is too small for a bear. Ollie’s going to stay out in the living room.”
He huffed out a breath and leaned his muzzle on the side of her bed.
Loralie bent over his snout and gave him a kiss on the nose. “Thank you,” she whispered.
One more contented rumble later, and he was shuffling back down the hall where he ran into Mark.
“Whoa.” Mark smiled, and it was the first true smile he’d seen from the boy all day. “Hey, Ollie.”
He grunted at Mark and nudged him with his massive head. The boy’s hand landed on Ollie’s neck, and he leaned into him. Mark had been reluctant to accept affection from anyone but his grandfather all day. Ollie was hoping he wouldn’t be as reluctant with the a
nimal.
He dug his fingers into Ollie’s fur and kneaded, testing out the weight and texture of the thick pelt.
“You’re, like, the biggest thing I’ve ever seen.”
A chuffed breath.
“I wish I could be a bear,” Mark whispered. “I don’t want to be a coyote.”
A growl from Ollie.
“I know,” Mark said sadly. “We are the animal we are.”
And Ollie knew that though Mark might have put on the best face, the boy felt deeply, and he would need to be watched. Mark might not be the one to act out, but he would carry his pain like silent armor if he didn’t allow the wound to heal. He leaned into Ollie, pressing his body weight against the grizzly, and Ollie felt a bit of the tension seep away.
“Thanks for staying,” he said. “I feel better knowing you’re here.”
Another light growl.
“Hey, Mark, have you seen—” Kevin stepped into the hall. “Oh. Hey, Ollie.”
A low grunt.
“Mark, did you take my deodorant again?”
“I couldn’t find mine.”
“Dude, not cool.” Kevin hooked his younger brother around the neck and dragged him back down the hall. “You cannot go and steal a man’s deodorant like that.”
Letting the affectionate bickering of the boys fade back, he headed toward the living room and lay down next to Murtry, who was sprawled on his back, head lying on a Little Mermaid pillow Loralie had given him, clearly unworried about his dignity. The mastiff already had a purple bow clipped to one of his ears.
Sucker.
Ollie dozed, naturally lazy in bear form, and wondered in the back of his mind if there were any leftovers from the lasagnas that Cathy and his yaya had made earlier. It didn’t matter how recently he’d eaten as a human; when he shifted to his bear, he was always hungry.
He started a bit when he felt bare feet kneading his back, but relaxed again when he caught her scent.
“Hey, big guy,” she whispered.
A low rumble. He wished she’d shift and cuddle next to him. Her fox was a little bit of a thing, but sleek and quick in her natural form. And she’d probably sleep better. Sometimes human emotions were too complicated. Sinking into their animals was a way to relax.
As if reading his mind, she cocked her head and looked at Murtry. “Would he bother me?”
Ollie reached over and shoved a giant bear paw at Murtry, who merely flopped over and let out a loud snore.
Allie laughed. “Okay then. Probably not.”
She wandered back down the hall and, minutes later, he sensed her. The bright canine scent and the pad of delicate feet as the ashen silver fox trotted into the room. She sniffed around the house, inspecting the doors and even hopping up on the back of the couch to peer out the front window. After she’d inspected the perimeter of her territory, she circled around the bear warily before coming closer to investigate. Her nose tickled his nearest ear, and he flicked it at her and let out a deep rumbling sigh. Reassured, she snuggled down in the space between his head and his front paws, flicking his nose once with her fluffy grey tail.
A few minutes later, he heard her breathing slow and smooth into sleep.
It wasn’t the way he’d planned to spend his first night with Allison Smith, but Ollie couldn’t find it in him to complain.
Chapter Nine
ALLIE FELT THE WARMTH BEFORE she opened her eyes. Surrounding her. She snuggled back when it hugged her tighter. It breathed—
Her eyes flew open.
It breathed?
The last thing she remembered was her fox curling up with Ollie’s bear. They must have both shifted back to their human forms as they slept.
Oh no.
She looked down to see a light brown, tattooed arm wrapped around her waist.
Naked waist.
Naked Allie.
Ollie was behind her, a quiet snore rumbling from him as he held her. He was curled around her, one arm under her head and the other one circling her waist, his huge hand spread over her ribs, inches from her breast. They were plastered, his front to her back, and Allie felt every inch of him pressed against her.
As she’d always suspected, there was a lot of Ollie.
A lot.
Oh… my.
The house was silent. The dog and the man were both snoring.
Allie let herself have one moment of silent whining that she couldn’t throw caution to the wind and enjoy the moment more, but if the sun was up, then her children would be soon. And the last thing she wanted to explain was why Mom was naked in the living room with Ollie.
She took a deep breath.
One more second. Maybe ten seconds. She didn’t hear any little feet yet.
He felt so good.
Like, insanely good. Big and warm and… everywhere.
It had been so long since someone held her.
With a barely audible groan, she tried to ease his arm up. He gave a low growl and hugged her closer, nudging one thigh between her legs as his arm moved up and his hand closed possessively around a full breast.
Oh dear Lord.
Allie’s body heated in response.
So the bear liked cuddling. Clearly, there would be no escaping this without abject humiliation.
“Ollie?” she whispered.
He grumbled and nudged her hair to the side, burying his face at the nape of her neck.
“Ollie, you really need to wake up.”
“Hmm,” he mumbled and she felt teeth—teeth!—scrape her shoulder in a gentle bite. “Few more minutes, baby.”
He stretched and pressed against her, and Allie’s heart rate went into overdrive when she felt every inch of Ollie.
Kill me. Kill me now.
Or… in an hour or two. If that’s an option.
“Ollie!” She pinched the arm wrapped around her and his hand tightened around her breast.
“Ow.” He started awake behind her. “Wha—?”
“Naked. Living room. Four curious children.”
And he still wasn’t moving!
“Oliver Campbell, let me go.”
“Okay,” he said but didn’t lift his arm.
“Are you awake?”
“I don’t want to be.”
A slight easing of the arm holding her down and she managed to wiggle away just as she heard little footsteps hit the floor in the back bedrooms.
“Now I’m cold,” he said with a yawn, his eyes drifting lazily over her in the morning light. “Hey, you.”
Allie suddenly realized Ollie was looking at her naked. They were both naked. But she felt way more naked than him. The only man who’d ever seen her naked was Joe. And now Ollie.
Part of her wanted to be embarrassed about that, except that sleepy Ollie didn’t seem to mind the view. He wasn’t looking at the belly she carried or the stretch marks she was self-conscious about.
No, he was looking at her boobs.
She grabbed a throw from the back of the sofa and wrapped it around herself. “Where are your clothes?”
He smiled and his eyes slipped closed. “Where are yours?”
“You are really not a morning person, are you?”
He stretched his arms up and out and—wow, he was a big man—he rolled over, his body bared to the sun, acting like he was going back to bed.
Yeah, she looked.
“Ollie, unless you want a five-year-old asking why your naked butt isn’t a bear, you better go get your clothes.”
Murtry, who had been snoring, suddenly rolled over and let out a whoof loud enough to wake the dead.
Ollie rolled back over and reached an arm out, slapping the ground before he rose up on one arm and blinked at her.
“Allie?”
“Are you really awake this time?”
He looked around the room and Murtry walked over and gave the side of his face a sloppy lick. “Dog…”
A small voice called from the back of the house. “Maa-ma!”
Ollie’s eyes fl
ew open, and he looked down. “Oh shit.”
“Go get dressed,” she hissed.
“Were we—”
“Dressed! Now!” She started down the hall. “Coming, Lala. Let mama get dressed. I’ll be right there.”
She ran into her bedroom and leaned against the door, the throw still wrapped around her. She heard the front door slam and figured Ollie was finding his clothes wherever he’d stashed them.
Then the reason he had stayed the night hit her, and she slid down to the floor.
Covering her face, she let a few tears fall before she wiped them away and took a deep breath.
It was going to be another long day.
HE was watching her. Allie could feel his eyes, and she felt like she was still naked. Did he remember, or was he one of those men who had whole conversations in his sleep and then didn’t remember a thing later?
She poured the pancake batter onto the electric griddle and waited for the cakes to bubble up before she could turn them. Ollie had figured out how to work her coffeemaker, and he set a full mug beside her on the counter. Kevin and Mark were both sitting at the table. Chris and Loralie were watching cartoons on the TV in the living room.
“Are we going to school?” Kevin asked.
“No. I thought we’d go to Aunt Beth’s for a few days.”
She flipped the pancakes and watched the steam rise like she had a thousand mornings before. Everything felt the same, and nothing was.
Mark crossed his arms on the table and slid down to rest his chin on them. “Aunt Beth has a pool.”
Aunt Beth was also a social worker and her closest sister. She and her husband had a big house in Palm Desert where Allie often took the kids when it was time to do shopping or just to get away for a few days.
Beth and Brian, a contract attorney, just had their first baby a year before, but they loved having the older cousins come visit. Brian wasn’t a shifter, but he came from a big Scottish family, was oddly blasé about his wife turning into a Mexican grey wolf on full moons, and he loved spending time with the boys. Her dad had called Beth last night, explained what had happened, and Beth and Brian immediately extended the invitation.
Waking Hearts Page 10