Staggering out of the bathroom, he leaned against the wall, covering his face with his hands in agony. Please don't let it be Jeff. Please, please not Jeff!
The furious crescendo was past, and the thoughts came now in rhythm, steady marchers, step by step, in logical cadence. Kari's eyes, the way she had changed. Jeff's hostility on the phone. His easy access to her. The defensive response to Kitt's concern. Kari's panic at his suggestion they go home. Her refusal to talk about the assailant. The strange telephone conversation with her father. Her terror when in the half-darkened hallway for an agonizing moment she had seen her father in him.
Jeff an abuser, a rapist? Jeff molesting his child?
Over and over in the gray hours before dawn he went over the events in his mind, analyzing, questioning, dreading. He considered each word spoken the night before, the panic, the despair. By the time some weak, watery sunshine seeped through the windows he knew. Without a shred of doubt he knew that Kari had been raped, maybe for months, and it was Jeff who had aborted her childhood.
His head throbbed. What now? Did he call the police? What about the other kids? Was Lita in danger? Should he let Kari decide when and how to report it? Wasn't that a terrible burden to put on a child? He didn't know how the police handled things like this, but they'd have to do some sort of investigation. Couldn't be easy on the victim. Having to talk about it, accuse her own father, maybe send him to jail. Remembering. Did Laura know? Could a mother not know?
Some immediate crises were coming up. Jeff and Laura were set to pick up their daughter, and in this train wreck one thing was certain. She wasn't going back there. Protection is what she had sought from him, and she was going to get it.
Better figure out what he was going to tell them. Sorry, I'm keeping your child? Assuming that Laura didn't know, would Kari talk to her? He was going to have to tell Kari he knew about Jeff. What if she denied it? Call Jeff and arrange to meet him alone first. Maybe at the restaurant down the street. No, not a restaurant. No need for an audience. Downstairs then, in the workout room? Anybody could walk in. The condo was out of the question. Kari was here.
He dozed for a half hour on the couch before he faced the bleak day when he had to confront Jeff, whose betrayals were piling up like debris from a mortar attack.
He wasn't much of an actor and Jeff oozed suspicion at his request that they meet alone in the conference room of his condo project. But Kitt was in no mood to take no for an answer, and Jeff reluctantly agreed.
After breakfast, he tackled Kari.
“Why don't you want to go home, Kari?”
Her lips were pinched shut, and she avoided his eyes.
“Kari.” He held her hand as she tried to leave, gently, afraid to frighten her. “I don't want to force you to talk about it, but we haven't got much choice. Your dad is on his way to pick you up. Before he gets here, the two of us have to decide what we're going to do, at least for today. Then we can worry about what's going to happen after that.”
Tears streamed down her face, and she sat down, limp and shaky.
“He's coming right now?”
“In a half hour.”
She went white, and backed away from him.
“I don't want to see him.”
“You don't have to, Kari. I will.”
“Here?”
“Downstairs, in the conference room. I called to reserve it.” He hesitated for a moment. She gave him a worried stare. “Hon, I'd like to give you time. But today we haven't got it.”
“Why not?”
“You're a minor. I have no legal right to keep you here. Your father can make you go home.”
“No! No! No!”
“Then tell me the truth. You've been raped, more than once. I have done a lot of thinking last night. It's got to be somebody you see just about every day.”
She said nothing.
“If it had been someone at school or so, you'd have told Mom and Dad. They'd have done something. But you didn't.”
The fear in her eyes was tangible.
“So who, Kari?”
“I can't! I can't tell you.”
“Because it's someone I know?”
Her knuckles were white as she balled her fists, digging her fingernails deep into her flesh. She shook her head furiously.
“Is that it, Kari?”
“You wouldn't believe me,” she whispered. “Nobody would believe me.”
“I think I already know.”
“You can't know!”
She was trembling violently now, and her eyes were large and almost black in her white, drawn face. She began to speak a few times, but no sound came out, and after a while she slumped back in her chair, drawing up her knees and clasping them. Like a porcupine, he thought, rolled into a defensive ball. He was aching to hug her as he used to do when she was hurt. But she winced as he reached for her hand, and he quickly pulled back.
“Kari?”
Shivering, she made a few futile attempts to talk, then rested her forehead on her knees, sobbing uncontrollably. He reached and covered her hand with his, and this time she let him. After a long time she tried again, and a hoarse whisper finally came out.
“Dad. It was Dad.”
“Kari, your dad raped you?”
“Yes.”
“And he's been doing this for a while? Even yesterday?”
“Yes,” she whispered. For a moment, nothing was said as he squeezed her hand, his eyes warm and sympathetic. There was a sob in his throat, too.
“What about Mom, Kari? Have you told her?”
“I tried.” Her voice was scratchy and he thought he'd never seen anything more pathetic.
“I told her Dad was touching me, and she said—she said—”
“What?”
“She didn't believe me. Said I watched too much TV, and Dad wouldn't do anything wrong, and not to talk about it ever again. With anybody.”
Laura blew her off, like this was trivial? A child went to her mother with something like that and got hugged and comforted and protected—didn't she? Why hadn't Laura kicked Jeff out, held this kid in her arms as he wanted to and couldn't? Laura could have done it.
“She must not have understood. Maybe she didn't realize it had gone as far as it had. Do you want us to talk to her together?”
“No!”
He walked around the room a couple of times, sorting things out, a bleak array of evil and accusation. Finally, he stopped by her chair, looking thoughtfully ahead. He was going to touch her hair, but her frightened eyes held him back.
“We've got a lot of things to figure out, Kari. But for now I will have a talk with your dad.”
“You have to?”
“Yes. Most of all because I have to tell him you're staying here.”
She took several deep breaths.
“Can you do that? What if he says it isn't true and he's going to—”
“I will find out later what I can do legally. For now, believe me, I can do it. Don't worry. You're not going back. Now tell me one more thing, and then I am out of here. What about Lita? Is she okay?”
She thought it over for a moment and frowned, as though suddenly not sure.
“Grandma and Grandpa Wilford are coming this morning to pick Lita and Tony up for a few days.”
“Good. That gives us time.”
When he closed the front door, he heard her slide the deadbolt in place.
Jeff came bustling in fifteen minutes late. He looked around the room as he came in, tried the door at the opposite end, and found it locked. He turned to Kitt.
“All right, where's Kari? And don't think you can—“
“Jeff, shut up.”
Jeff started to say something, but the cold fury in his brother's eyes stopped him. He walked around the table, gaining time, and leaned on the window sill. Visibly unnerved by Kitt's unbroken stare, he squirmed and angrily caught himself, straightening his shoulders. Kit watched him. He wonders what I know. How can he think I'll hand that chil
d back to him? All the things he'd planned to say washed away in a wave of loathing.
“You slime,” he said slowly and Jeff winced. “I ought to break your neck.”
“What the—”
“How do you live with yourself? And act like everything's okay?”
“What are you on? I'm getting Kari and we're out of here.”
“For the record, Kari's not going with you. Fun and games for Daddy are over.”
“Stooping to a little drink, Kitt?”
“She's not covering up for you anymore. If you ever lay another hand on her, I'll be coming after you, and that's a promise.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I am talking about rape.”
“Rape! You've got to be kidding. You don't seriously believe—”
“Oh yes, I do. And spare me the clean-cut act. It stinks.”
Jeff's voice was patronizing.
“Kitt, you can figure this one out for yourself. If she's been telling you stuff like that—well, she's more messed up than I thought.”
“I bet it comes with incest.”
“Calm yourself, will you? You haven't even heard my side and you're throwing accusations around. I deserve a little more trust—”
“Trust—good one.”
Jeff waved the remark away.
“Be serious, Kitt. Surely you don't think I'd rape anyone, let alone my own child?”
“Yes, I do.”
Jeff ran his fingers through his hair, his mouth twitching nervously.
“How did we come to this, Kitt? We are brothers, for heaven's sake. If you'd told me a year ago we'd be having a conversation like this—I can't believe you think that I—Kitt, you can't believe that. This is insane.”
“Cut the crap, Jeff. I have noticed for a while that something was wrong, but I was just stupid enough to put it all down to stress and adolescence. But now I know. So drop the act.”
“Kitt, honestly—”
“Coming from you, that word lacks conviction.”
“What can I say? You're ready to hang me on the say-so of a disturbed child with a lively imagination and a way with the truth.”
“Well, a doctor will be able to set us straight on that,” Kitt said coolly. “I'm having her checked out, count on it. If she turns out to be okay, I'll be sure to apologize.”
“No way are you getting medical care for my daughter. You have no right. This is as far as this crap is going to go. Kari and I are leaving.”
“Correction. You are leaving. Kari isn't.”
“Are you going to make me bring my attorney? This is kidnapping. It is contributing to the delinquency of a minor.”
“So you're familiar with that concept.”
“I am warning you. In case it slipped your mind, I am her legal guardian, not you.”
“I am having the locks changed today, Jeff. I don't want any unannounced visits.”
“You fool! Are you really that naive or are you just looking to get back at me? You've never done anything right except hit a ball, and now you're not even doing that, so you start playing shrink. You want the truth? Okay, I'll tell you some truth. Kari's a mess because you, little brother, you threw everybody's life into a tailspin. You've caused enough trouble in this family so that kid doesn't know up from down and she makes up stories to get comfort and revenge at the same time! And who else to turn to with her sad tales but Uncle Santa Claus.”
“It's my fault, is that it?”
“Yes, that's it! You're the one she came to because you're the problem, and she wants you to fix it. She knows you've been telling us to drop dead when we ask you to play tennis, so she makes up a story that's sure to get your attention.”
“Talk about playing shrink.”
“Does it seem just a little odd to you that a child who is supposed to have been raped by her father should look for help from his brother? From any guy?”
“She may not have a lot of choices.”
“Of course. She has no mother, no teachers, nothing. I suggest you go get her, and get her now. You try to keep that child here and I will have you in court or in jail or both!”
“You talk big, Jeff. You always did. I used to fall for it.”
“Don't force me to take legal action against you, Kitt.”
“Then don't force me to call the police against you.”
For a moment they stood glaring at each other. Kitt stepped aside, gestured to the door.
“Go ahead and leave. I won't stand in your way. You try to take Kari, and I'll call the police and let them sort it out.”
How had he ever thought of this man as an imposing figure, as a magnetic personality? As he stood there, pale and nervous, feverishly fingering his keys, he looked pathetic. At ten in the morning it was obvious he'd had more than one drink. In a few short weeks his buoyant good looks had eroded into pallid flabbiness. His voice was an irritating whine.
“Kitt, listen to me, will you?”
“Not today. For now, she stays here. If you try to take her away, don't think for a minute I won't call the cops. I am serious. Got that?”
“And what do you suggest I tell Laura?”
“That's your problem. Try the truth.”
“Let me see if I get this straight. You want me to tell Laura that Kari is accusing me of molesting her and I am leaving her with you for protection. Why not? Perhaps you could give me some juicy details so I can jazz up the story a bit, make it sound more authentic, know what I mean? How about a dark cellar or a gag and blindfold? That would go over big.”
“I don't care how it goes over. If you don't tell her, I will. Kari needs her mother. Laura has to know.”
“No way am I going to lay this on Laura. She's got enough on her plate. And she's not as naive as you—she'd see through a story like that in a minute. She'd be livid at Kari.”
“At Kari?”
“Yes, at Kari! We've always been very strict with the children about honesty.”
“Too bad you didn't pick up some pointers yourself.”
“Kitt, cut this out. You've had your fun. You're mad at me and you're trying to screw me good. Enough's enough. Now let's get Kari and—”
“Go home, Jeff. Talk to your wife. I'll call you.”
“Kitt Buchanan, you knock this off or I will have the police take her out of here!”
“Should be interesting. You explaining to the cops why your brother won't let you near your daughter. You've got two days to talk to Laura, and you have that long only because Lita and Tony aren't going to be there. If you don't tell her by then, I do.”
“You can't do this, Kitt.”
“Watch me. You may scare a little girl into keeping your nasty little secret, but you don't scare me. And don't get any ideas about Lita. Or Tony.”
“I don't believe you're saying this to me. I'm your brother!”
“I don't have a brother. I just have a little niece who's crying her heart out because Daddy raped her.”
“You're talking about a vindictive child in crisis! She's trying to get even, can't you see that? With you, with me! I've had enough of this nonsense. I'm taking Kari home.”
“Go ahead, try.”
“Don't play the jock with me. I can have you sent to jail for this.”
“Maybe we can be cell mates.”
Jeff sank his teeth in his lower lip. Finally, he walked away, turning at the door.
“You will hear from my attorney.”
The door banged, shuddering on its hinges. He sat down, elbows on the table, burying his face in his hands. You will hear from my attorney. That was what they had come to. Just that. You will hear from my attorney.
Two days went by and he heard nothing. The situation screamed for action. But what? Report Jeff now? He couldn't ignore it, nor could he discount the danger to Lita and Tony when they got back. Kari was dead set against any action, and it was becoming an issue of trust between them. What if he reported it and she turned away from him, too? And what if she d
enied it? But if he didn't, how was this mess going to be resolved?
When he called at the end of two days, Laura told him Jeff had left town on business and wouldn't be back for a couple of weeks. What business Jeff had that would take him away that long was a mystery to Kitt, but the reason for the sudden trip was crystal clear. He should have known Jeff would duck out.
“I need to speak with you, Laura,” he said. “This is about Kari, and I don't want to do it on the phone. Can I come over this afternoon?”
“Suit yourself. I will be gone till four.”
He wasn't looking forward to breaking the news to her, but it had to be done. When he told Kari she went pale.
“She'll get mad. She won't believe it.”
“Maybe not. We have no choice here. If I'm going to keep you here, she has to know why or she'll call the police to bring you back.”
“She can do that?”
He was touched by her panic, and hastened to reassure her.
“Let me just go talk with your mom, and see how she can help. She'll understand that you can't be at home right now, and she can come and see you here.”
That seemed to satisfy her, and Kitt breathed a sigh of relief. Talking to Kari was treading on soap bubbles. Her emotions were raw, and her tears right near the surface. Navigating in this emotional whirlpool was bewildering.
But when he came to Laura's, emotions took a back seat. Clearly and concisely he stated his case. Kari had come to him in a state of panic. She'd told him of months of sexual abuse at the hands of her father, the last time on Christmas day. He'd decided to keep her out of harm's way till a solution was worked out. What was Laura going to do?
She raised her eyebrows.
“What am I going to do? Put a stop to this nonsense, that's what. And I'm bringing my daughter home where she belongs.”
He stared at her in disbelief.
“Jeff's been raping Kari! Will you think about that for a minute? You want to bring her back to that?”
“Don't even, Kitt Buchanan! You're getting back at Jeff by using his own daughter against him! What are you trying to do, sell a juicy scoop to the tabloids?”
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