'THE INTERVAL'
When the Sicilian Char-woman had finished the narration of her trulywonderful experiences, and while the army were yet applauding her, theKing stepped down from his chair, and taking the good woman by the hand,explained to her the object of their great expedition. 'And now,' saidthe astute old monarch in conclusion, 'powerful as we undoubtedly are,and as you can see for yourself that we are, we have yet one weakness,and that weakness is, that we cannot boast of a single char-woman of anydescription within our ranks. It has occurred to us, in listening toyour story, that if you are able, as I have no doubt you will be, toobtain a good character from your last place, that we shall be delightedto engage you as an assistant to the amiable Boadicea in her attendanceupon my person.'
'Fiddlesticks,' snapped the abrupt woman, 'look after your personindeed! Look after it yourself,' and the strange creature walked off.Unwilling to lose such a treasure, the King called after her, andexplained that if he had offended her it was quite unintentionally, andoffered her any post she would like to fill, of course providing that ithad not already been filled, in his army.
'Now you are talking reasonably,' replied the quickly mollifiedcreature. 'Well, as you are so very kind, I don't mind being theflag-bearer.'
'But I am really afraid we have no flag,' objected the King.
'Oh, we'll soon settle that little difficulty,' replied the woman. Andshe at once removed her apron and snatching from the astonished Scoutthe staff he usually carried with him, she tied the apron thereto by itstwo strings and waved it proudly in the air three or four times, at eachtime jumping as high as she could.
Every one cheered in their delight at the readiness of the good woman,and congratulated each other cordially on this interesting addition totheir forces.
The King now stood up in his chair, and after quieting the generalexcitement by ringing his bell, he thus addressed his troops:--
'My dear old boys and girls, although, no doubt, I appear to you a veryfine man indeed, with a good appetite and fairly well covered for mytime of life, I am not quite the man I should be. You must know that inmy early babyhood I was a victim to the wicked carelessness of the royalcook. One morning this thoughtless creature left an unboiled parsnip onthe garden path (had it been boiled and soft, my fate had been differentperhaps) while chatting with a friend at the tradesmen's entrance. Asill luck would have it, I was at the time playing on the palace roof, towhich I had climbed through the nursery chimney, and, childlike, wasgazing curiously at a strange bird flying overhead, when I overbalancedand fell from the roof right on to the parsnip on the garden path,which, as you will guess, hurt me very severely indeed.'
The King here exhibited to his audience a dent on his head in the formof a parsnip.
'On hearing of this my father, of course, was highly indignant, andordered the cook to be beheaded instantly, or, at all events, as soon asshe had finished cooking the dinner.
'The dinner, however, was so excellent that my father, in his enjoymentof it, forgot all about my mishap, and the cook went unpunished.Nevertheless the shock to my system was so great that, feeling it evento this day, as I have said, I am not the man I should be. A trifleirritable now and again; or more sulky and disagreeable than I care toadmit; or at times even harsh, morose, surly, snappish, rattish, andshort-tempered, all little failings you have no doubt noticed, and whichnow, knowing my early misfortune, you will more readily excuse.
I FELL ON TO THE PARSNIP]
'Well,' continued the King, 'you will at least understand that a littlerest is good for me now and again, so that, as we have already travelledhalf the distance to my kingdom, I intend to give you all a wholeholiday to-morrow, and on the day following, which happens to be mybirthday, I will celebrate the great occasion with a grand review, afterwhich we shall once more resume our long journey.'
This welcome announcement was received with the greatest enthusiasm bythe brave fellows, and loud cheers echoed again and again through theforest, and a great feast was at once prepared.
THEY ALL ONCE MORE STARTED]
ON THEIR ADVENTUROUS JOURNEY]
Seated in a circle on the grass beneath the trees, the good soulsenjoyed to the full the simple fare before them, and then, after oncemore cheering the old monarch, retired to their tents to sleep, and todream of the morrow in store for them.
Next morning, with the exception of the old King, who intended to restand remain in bed all day, every one was up betimes. After a heartymeal, Bill explained to them all the dangers of the great forest, andthe necessity of returning to camp at dusk. Then, taking care not todisturb the King, they all left the camp, different parties takingdifferent directions, seeking amusement wherever they could find it.
Bill took care of his charges, who had the greatest sport in theworld,--tree-climbing, nutting, chasing butterflies, fishing in thepools, playing at Wild Indians, Hunt-the-Stag, Robbers and Thieves, PoorJenny is a-weeping, Red Rover, and every really sensible game that thereis to play, while Boadicea spent the time very happily in makingbeautiful bunches of wild flowers.
Chad, however, was a bit of a nuisance, crying all the morning becausehe was not allowed to eat toadstools; so to keep him out of mischief,Bill tied him to the highest branch of a very tall tree, and there lefthim to have his cry out.
The Long Man took Ptolemy Jenkinson in hand, and taught him how tobird-nest, at the same time adding to his own valuable collection ofeggs. The Ancient Mariner made a swing for the Absent-minded Indian, andwondered, while he was swinging him to and fro, whether he enjoyed it ornot, for the thoughtful creature's face still gave no sign at all ofwhat was taking place in his mind, supposing he had one. The Doctorspent the day upside down, with his feet supported against the trunk ofa tree and his nose on the ground, while he studied the habits of thestag-beetle. The Boy Scout practised scouting by continually losing hispatron and then finding him again, while the Respectable Gentlemanhimself kept his respectability in hand by behaving most politely to allthe trees of the forest,--raising his hat to the silver-birches, leavinghis card on the ash-trees, introducing a hornbeam to a blackthorn,apologising to the thistles for treading on their lower leaves,and, in fact, behaving like the perfect gentleman he was, and having areally enjoyable day.
And left him to have his cry out]
The Triplets played hide-and-seek, and the Sicilian Char-woman set toand dusted and scrubbed down a good number of the forest trees, andspent the rest of the day in endeavouring to clear up the last year'sleaves that everywhere littered the grass.
It was quite late in the evening when all returned to camp, quite tiredout, and after supper each crept quietly to bed without awakening theKing, and soon the whole camp was fast asleep.
THE WHOLE CAMP WAS FAST ASLEEP]
In the morning every one awoke in the best of spirits, and brimful ofthe many things they had to tell of the happy time they had spent theday before. The old monarch seemed much refreshed for his long rest, andbefore sitting down to breakfast every one in turn went up to him andshook the happy old boy by the hand, wishing him many happy returns,after which they all sat down and enjoyed a substantial breakfast.Before the repast was quite finished, and while the King was looking theother way, Bill walked round the ring formed by the army as they satupon the grass, and collected birthday presents for the old monarch.Every one was delighted to give something to His Majesty to show howmuch they appreciated his greatness, and when the old chap received themany gifts, all done up in one brown paper parcel, he was so overcomethat he could hardly stammer forth his thanks. And this is what hefound in the parcel when, with trembling hands, he had succeeded inopening it:--
From Bill, A bone-handled, two-bladed pocket-knife, a little rusted, but with only one blade missing. From Noah, Some string. From Ratchett, 8 brace buttons (very bright). From the Twins {Quentin,
Wooden top of peg-top. {Hannibal, Iron peg of same. From Randall, Ferrule of umbrella. From Nero, More string. From Biddulph, Dial of old watch (not cracked very much). From Knut, Glass marble (beautifully coloured). From Chad, 2 pear drops (old, but in good condition). From the other children collectively, Twenty last year's horse chestnuts on string (very hard). From the Ancient Mariner, Piece of wood skilfully cut into the form of a pebble. From the Absent-Minded Indian, Nothing. From the Triplets, 3 bunches of violets. From the Respectable Gentleman, His visiting-card. From the Boy Scout, One of the Killgruel town-keys he had swallowed. From the Sicilian Char-woman, Small piece of soap. From the Long Man, Wren's egg. From Boadicea, A hat full of ripe blackberries. From the Doctor, Half of cough lozenge. From Ptolemy Jenkinson, A last year's ticket for a box.
Every one clamoured for a speech, but the old fellow was so affected byall this unexpected kindness, that he would not trust himself to openhis mouth, so with tears of gratitude pouring from his eyes, he retiredto his chair. These interesting proceedings thus coming to an end, hewas wheeled into the forest by Boadicea until they came to the openspace where the review was to take place.
Having dried his eyes and smartened himself up, with Boadicea standingsedately at his side holding the presents, the King now solemnly awaitedthe appearance of the troops. Soon there was a great noise in thedirection of the camp, and then they could be heard approaching.
First came the nine brave sons of Crispin and Chloe, proudly marchingthree by three, and as they passed the King each gallantly saluted him.Now followed the stately Char-woman with the flag held aloft, and whenshe came opposite His Majesty she jumped magnificently three times intothe air. She was followed by more of Bill's charges, and then, withgreat dignity, Bill, the King's general, marched past the Royal Old Boyand saluted him grandly.
Another detachment of Bill's charges followed the general, then theAncient Mariner approached, and, after placing the Absent-minded Indianon the ground, he, with much dignity, saluted the King by touching hisforelock, sailor fashion, and after a few steps of the hornpipe, oncemore resumed his burden and moved on. The Ancient Mariner was followedby the Long Man who winked knowingly at the King as he passed by.Ptolemy Jenkinson came next, then the Doctor, who, not knowing quitewhat was expected of him, proceeded to feel the King's pulse, but wasquickly hustled off by the Scout, who now approached.
The Respectable Gentleman followed the Boy Scout, and raised his hat ina very gentlemanly manner to the King as he passed him and politelyhanded him one of his cards, upon which he had scribbled a few goodwishes to the old monarch.
Now, one by one, the Triplets passed in front of the delighted King,before whom each of the sweet creatures performed the most gracefulcurtsy, and the procession then terminated with another detachment ofBill's charges.
The King was more than satisfied, and they all once more started ontheir adventurous journey.
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THE REAL SOLDIER]
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Bill the Minder Page 10