ON THE MORNING of Christmas Eve, Holly was lying in bed thinking about how everything had changed.
She whispered a prayer of thanks, as she had every morning since the abduction, feeling grateful and blessed that they’d gotten Penny back unscathed. The pediatrician had checked her out, pronounced her fine and praised Holly and Cash for the work they’d been doing with her. She was advancing faster than she’d been expected to, and soon she would be caught up with her peers.
She and Cash had taken Penny to the doctor together, had shared a quick celebratory hug at the good news and then they’d gone their separate ways.
Holly, of course, still wanted more than anything to provide a home for Penny, and she knew now that she wanted a secure home for herself as well. But she’d been humbled. No way could she do any of that in isolation.
Safe Haven was the right community for her and for Penny, but she couldn’t hope to make it work if she stuck to herself. Didn’t even want to. The way everyone had pitched in to help find Penny and capture Orin had been support unlike anything she’d ever experienced before.
No one else had seemed to think it was any big deal. That was just how things were here, in this town.
She wanted to stay, to build a life here.
Having seen Cash go on the warpath for Penny, realizing how much he cared, she’d made a decision. She was deeply sorry for her own role in the deception. She should have been honest as soon as she found Tiff’s journal. She hadn’t been, though, and if she didn’t do something, Penny would pay the price. As far as she knew, Cash was still planning to move back to Atlanta and commute to Safe Haven one weekend a month.
It wasn’t enough.
She leaned over and looked into the crib, but Penny was still sleeping. She hadn’t been able to let the baby sleep in her own room, not after the scare she’d had. The police had gone over her apartment, had seen how Orin’s accomplice had gotten in and taken Penny, and they’d made sure that the locks were secure. Rita had offered to stay with them, as had Cash. But she knew she had to get over her fear.
And Cash had sounded so ambivalent that she turned him down. A forced relationship wasn’t what she wanted.
On her nightstand sat a picture of her and Tiff, and she picked it up and looked at it. It was a rare time when they’d both been happy and enjoying themselves, eating ice cream, when they were probably ten and eleven years old, their arms slung around each other, big messy smiles.
“I’m doing the best I can,” Holly said to the picture. “But I’m going to have to make some changes. I can’t live the way we’ve been living.”
A ray of sun struck the picture, illuminating Tiff’s smile, and to Holly, it felt like a benediction.
She sat up in bed. So be it. It was time for a grand gesture.
* * *
CASH WAS GETTING into the Tesla after the Christmas-Eve church service when Sean called out to him.
He welcomed the interruption to his thoughts. Ever since Penny’s disappearance and recovery, he had been in a very strange place mentally.
He was incredibly grateful that Penny hadn’t been hurt and that she was doing well. And he was getting along fine with Holly.
Now, though, he felt at loose ends. Yeah, he’d probably go to Sean and Anna’s for a bit of Christmas-Eve cheer, but after that, what? It felt wrong to just go back to his condo; he knew that, really, he should be back in Atlanta. And he would, as soon as the holiday season was over.
But to wake up alone tomorrow, to miss his baby’s first Christmas...that just didn’t seem right.
“Hey, nice service, huh?” Sean clapped him on the back. “We had a little change of plans. Going to stop by the park instead of gathering back at our place, since it’s such a nice night.” He looked sideways at Cash. “You’ll still come, won’t you?”
Cash stretched and faked a yawn. “Think I’m just going to head home.”
Sean’s eyes narrowed and he studied Cash more closely. “No way, dude, that’s ridiculous. Just come. The twins really want you to.”
“What are you going to do at the park on Christmas Eve?” Cash knew he was just being resistant, but truthfully, he wasn’t in the mood to socialize. Had even been thinking of backing out of the gathering at Sean’s house, and to go to the park...
“Have a bonfire and let the kids run around,” he said. “Come on. You don’t have a choice. Liam!” He yelled the words at their brother, walking by with Yasmin. “Gimme a hand here.”
“Oh, no, you don’t.” Cash started backing away.
“What’s going on?” Liam asked.
“Our brother thinks he’s too good for a bonfire at the park,” Sean said.
“That’s not what I—”
But it was too late. They came at him from both sides and grabbed him, each taking an arm and a leg. The world spun, and then he crashed down into the back of Sean’s pickup.
“Hey!” Cash yelled. “It’s dirty back here! Watch the suit!”
But his brothers just laughed. “See you at the park,” Liam said, and slapped the side of the truck. Seconds later, the truck pulled out of the lot.
The old Cash would have been furious, but now he’d had a major shift in perspective. He stretched out in the back of the pickup and looked up at the stars while Sean drove the short distance to the park, seeming to take the corners extra sharply—more than likely, just for the pleasure of making Cash roll around.
The stars were bright and the live oaks and palms filtered the moonlight, and the sea air blew in.
Cash could admit it to himself now: he loved it here. Loved the people and the land, loved the sense of haven that had given the place its name.
His mother’s memory had been restored, and in the past three days she’d spent hours with him, Sean and Liam, talking about their childhood, laughing and crying and remembering together. It hadn’t been all bad. They’d rediscovered plenty of good moments along with the scary ones. And Rita had apologized, with heartfelt tears, to all of them. She’d tried to explain what it had been like for her to be so young, with three little boys and few job skills. She’d expressed her deep regret about what had happened.
Most of the talk had been with Taffy in the room, cuddling with one of them. That only made sense, since the three boys hadn’t realized that Orin had killed the dog they’d had back in Alabama as kids, that in fact, it was that that had made Rita see just how dangerous and out of control Orin was. She’d realized then that he was a risk to them, not just to her, and had made the decision to take them and run.
A lot of missing pieces of Cash’s life had clicked into place.
It had been a cleansing and fresh start. He’d gotten his mother back.
The truck stopped and he realized he hadn’t even minded the unexpected, jolting ride.
* * *
HOLLY LIT THE last candle and checked the foil-wrapped dinner once more. Her heart was beating double-time. Was she making a huge mistake?
The big live oak tree was lit up overhead, shedding light on the picnic table where she’d arranged everything. A breeze stirred the air, but it was still plenty warm; in fact, Holly was sweating in her lightweight jacket. A few family groups and couples strolled nearby, chatting, and somewhere in the distance, church bells chimed.
Now she wished she hadn’t had Norma and Rita take Penny, wished for the comfort of her baby. But in a way, she was doing this for Penny. She needed to focus. She drew in deep, soothing breaths and rehearsed, yet again, what she was going to say.
There was a triple honk of a truck horn, and then Sean’s truck pulled up. A moment later, a very confused-looking Cash walked down the park path toward her, brushing dirt and straw off his classy, nicely fitted suit.
Game time.
She stood and tried on a smile. “Hi, Cash.”
He slowed and tilted his head. He didn’t smile back. “What’s going
on?”
Her heart sank, but she had to go through with it now. “I wanted to apologize for not letting you know the truth, earlier, about Penny.”
“Not necessary.” His words were clipped.
“It is to me. Cash, I’m sorry I did that to you. It was wrong. I should have told you everything I knew about Penny about Tiff, as soon as I found out. Maybe if I had...” Her throat tightened and she had to pause, but he didn’t help her out. “Maybe if I had, Orin wouldn’t have gotten to Penny.”
“Water under the bridge.” But his voice was still cool. “What’s all this?” he asked, waving a hand to indicate the table.
Her stomach churned. She’d made a ridiculous choice. “Um, well, I thought that just saying I was sorry didn’t mean much, so I made you a meal.”
He raised his eyebrows and didn’t say anything.
“I heard from Ma Dixie and your brothers that you like cornbread and fish chowder, so I made that. There’s wine, too,” she added hastily, because the fare sounded so humble. “And...I made you a present, too, back when I was doing that, making presents, remember?” She pulled out the hand-painted picture frame, with the photo she’d taken of him, Liam and Cash laughing together as they’d pulled the crab trap from the water.
He took it from her, looked at it for a long time, then met her eyes. “You made me a picture of me and my brothers. And cornbread and fish chowder.” His voice had no inflection to it.
“Yeah.” She felt like a complete idiot. But no way was she taking this food home with her. “Can I dish you up some? It’s best when it’s hot.”
He looked off to the side as if he was trying to figure out how to frame his rejection of her offering. But she wasn’t having that.
Quickly, she uncovered the fish chowder and ladled some up for him, then for herself. Not that she was hungry, but it wouldn’t do for him to eat alone. Besides, even with her churning stomach, the rich combination of garlic, tomato and seafood smelled fantastic.
She took the foil off the pan of cornbread and sliced it into pie-shaped pieces, then scooped him out a big one. “Here,” she said, “I’ll let you put butter on this yourself. I don’t know how much you like.”
Then she reached into the cooler. “Which would you prefer? Wine, or fresh-squeezed lemonade?” When he didn’t answer, she finally hazarded a glance up at him. He was looking at her, his forehead wrinkled.
“I’m just having lemonade, myself. It’s really good. Want me to pour you some?” She was babbling nervously and he still hadn’t said a word, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself. Her hands shook as she poured two wineglasses full of lemonade.
“Have a seat,” she said, and sat down herself.
Like a man in a daze, he slowly sank down onto the picnic-table bench. And Holly felt her shoulders relax, just a little. If he was going to completely reject her, he wouldn’t have sat down. And now that he had the food in front of him, she was pretty sure he wasn’t going to be able to resist eating it.
The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. That’s what the cliché said. She sure was hoping it was true.
They ate for a few minutes without speaking. Holly, who’d thought she wouldn’t be able to eat a bite, actually found that she had a decent appetite. She could be a pretty good cook, and she’d gone all out getting fresh vegetables and herbs and spices for the chowder, and used her own grandmother’s cornbread recipe.
He was already finished with his first bowl before he looked up at her. “This is really good,” he said. “Thank you. I don’t think anyone has ever cooked me my favorite meal before, on purpose.”
His comment said worlds about the way he’d grown up. Every kid should have their favorite meal cooked for them—pretty often when it came down to it.
He tasted the cornbread, and his eyes crinkled. “Another win,” he said. He smiled, obviously enjoying the food, but she felt like his smile wasn’t quite reaching his eyes.
“There’s something I want to ask you.” May as well get this out in the open now, while he was feeling full and happy.
Instantly his smile disappeared. “What is it?” His shoulders slumped a little.
She sucked in a breath and shot up a prayer. “We need you.” She stopped. That didn’t come out right. “Me and Penny, we need you. Not your money, you. Would you consider staying nearby at least part of the time, for Penny’s sake?”
Now that she’d gotten that out she felt like she might faint, but almost instantly it felt good. She didn’t know if he would accept her apology, let alone her proposal that he stick around, but at least she was being honest and real.
He put down his spoon. Then the cornbread. Let out a sigh.
“I understand, if you need time to think about it. I just wanted to get the idea on your radar. I think it would be really great for Penny. I mean, it would be great for me, too, but she’s what matters the most.”
“I do,” he said. “Need time to think about it.” Abruptly, he stood. “Thank you for doing all this. I appreciate it.”
It hadn’t worked. He wasn’t going to forgive her, and he wasn’t going to stay in the area. Her stupid lying and deception had cost Penny a father.
Had cost her the man she loved. “Wait, Cash.” She stood and hurried around the table to him, held out her arms.
He looked at her, head tilted to one side. “What?” His tone was gentle but puzzled.
Don’t hold back. This isn’t the time for that. “I’ve missed you, Cash. I’ve missed your companionship and friendship and sense of humor and...everything. I’ve missed everything about you.”
He frowned, and she realized that it was words. Just words, and they weren’t enough.
She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him, lifting her face.
His eyes darkened and he looked at her—first her eyes, then her lips.
She raised herself up on tiptoe, wanting closeness, and then he crushed her into his arms and kissed her. Really kissed her.
His lips on hers were hungry, tasting, seeking and finding the comfort they both seemed to need. His hands pressed her to him until she didn’t know where her own body stopped and his began. It wasn’t disrespectful, though; he wasn’t trying to put his hands all over her like some men would. He just seemed to want her close, to move his mouth on hers with gentle promise.
She’d never soared so high. Into the stars, into the possibilities. Hope bubbled up inside her. Could he kiss her like that if he didn’t care?
And then it was over. He loosened his grip and created distance, a little and then some more, holding her by her shoulders. He studied her face, her eyes. Then he looked off into the darkness.
They were both breathing hard.
“I still need time to think about it,” he said finally. “About living close, I mean. Are you okay?”
She nodded, too quickly. “Sure. Fine.” Her voice sounded high and false.
“Okay.”
“See you later?” The question sounded pathetic.
“Sure.” He turned and walked away, and she sat looking after him until her vision blurred with tears.
* * *
CASH GOT BACK to the parking lot and realized he didn’t even have his car here. He was going to have to walk back to the church—either that, or call one of his asinine brothers, or hitch a ride with Holly.
And since he’d just walked away from her, that last didn’t seem like a smart idea.
He sat down on a park bench that was in the shadows, away from the illumination of the giant oak tree’s Christmas lights. His head was spinning and he needed a little space to settle down, anyway.
He’d had women in his life who were practically celebrities, models, stunning beauties. He’d been proud to have them on his arm. But not a one of them would have taken the time to find out his favorite meal and prepare it.
Ho
lly was a good woman. He knew that now. Despite the lies she told—which were really lies of omission, and all because of her less honorable sister—she was a good woman.
Not only that, but her slim figure also drew him closer, her long blond hair made him want to run his hands through it. Her lips were beautiful, and even as she’d been apologizing, he’d been watching them because he wanted to kiss them. Maybe that was why he had acted so awkward. It wasn’t like him.
But Holly wasn’t like other women.
A familiar truck pulled over to his side of the parking lot. Sean and Liam. They got out and started to walk down toward where Holly was, and he suddenly realized they must’ve been in on the whole plan. From his dark vantage point, he watched them go toward her and speak to her. He couldn’t see her, he was too far away, but he figured that was what they were doing.
He wanted to know what she was saying, how she was feeling. He wanted to always know where she was and what she was up to.
If he got her a really nice ring, would she accept it? Would she marry him? Or had she made that apology meal because she wanted to be friendly co-parents?
Who could want a man like him, a man who had his father’s rotten genes?
But the moment he had that thought, the thought that had tormented him for years, he knew it was wrong. Knew it, because a vision of Penny came to his mind’s eye. Would he blame her for the mistakes her mother had made?
Everything in him recoiled at the thought. Penny carried Tiff’s blood, but not her mistakes. Those rested solely at Tiff’s feet. Penny was innocent.
Cash didn’t think of himself as exactly innocent. He certainly had his share of faults and flaws. But he knew now that he didn’t bear responsibility for Orin’s sins.
“Where are you?”
“Dude, show yourself!”
Sean and Liam were walking around the parking lot, calling for him and none too quietly. They were going to give up. “Over here,” he said, resigning himself to some brotherly wisdom and advice he didn’t really want to hear.
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