But for now the twins were happy playing about on the bank of the creek; and if that satisfied them, so be it. Flynn was more than happy to laze with Antonia, watching them.
‘Friends?’ he asked
‘Friends.’ But she sounded doubtful.
The silence stretched out, slowly changing from mildly tense to something comfortable and easy.
‘How come you don’t have a wife and kids?’ she asked suddenly.
‘Didn’t we have this conversation before?’
‘Did we?’
‘You asked me if I had a girlfriend.’
‘And you said no. Why not?’ If she hadn’t already stated how vehemently opposed she was to starting up a relationship he’d think she was flirting.
‘Haven’t met the right person,’ he said lightly.
‘It must be hard … to meet the right person. How do you know?’
He considered his reply very carefully. ‘I assume when it is the right one, you just know.’
She frowned. ‘I always thought Mum and Dad were right for each other but now they’ve split and they’re both with other people.’
‘I suppose circumstances can change how couples view things and each other.’ He shrugged helplessly. ‘I’m the wrong person to ask.’
‘But if you keep waiting, the right person might go off with someone else.’
‘Doesn’t that mean they weren’t the right person?’ He smiled.
‘There could be more than one, I suppose. Dad loved Mum and now he loves Jax.’
‘Maybe.’
More silence. Where had that little burst of questions come from? He felt like her father trying to answer them, as if she were a teenager wanting his wise advice. The advice of an older person. He wasn’t that much older!
‘You’re very good with children.’
‘I like them in general and yours are great.’
‘Thank you for not pushing them. It’s such a shame you don’t have any of your own. You’d be a great father.’
‘No, no. I’m happy to borrow other people’s for a while.’ He shook his head and stared away across the creek into the deep green of the forest where the shadows and sunlight shifted with the breeze in a constant interplay of light and dark. A family of his own. A dream he could never fulfil.
‘But don’t you want your own family?’ Why was she persisting with this?
He sucked in a deep breath and said what he’d never said out loud to anyone. ‘I don’t deserve to have one.’
Why he chose Antonia to confess to he had no idea, but the instant the words were out he regretted it. She had enough problems of her own without his to think about, and anyway he barely knew her.
Maybe that was why. She was a private person, didn’t gossip, didn’t know anyone in town well enough to pass on information. And in a weird way, maybe he wanted her to know he would be no good to her if she ever had thoughts in that direction, Stop her, cut off any hint that something might develop between them. Make it very clear. Friends.
‘Why?’
He couldn’t meet her eye, couldn’t continue.
‘Flynn, you’re kind, you’re decent and you like children. As far I can see, that qualifies you to deserve a family. I should know.’ The bitterness in her voice spoke volumes. ‘The man I was with …’
He turned then, stretched across to take her hand in his. She didn’t pull away. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said. ‘I must sound petty and self-pitying but you don’t know … I just …’
She smiled and her fingers curled over his for a moment. ‘It’s okay. I understand. Some things need to be put away and not spoken about until it’s time. If ever.’
He nodded. When it’s time. Would she tell him the things she wanted to keep locked away in her past? Would he ever tell her his?
‘If I ever do speak about it, it will be to you,’ he said. Deep in his heart he knew that was the truest thing he’d ever said.
‘Mummy, we need to do a wee.’
Antonia’s hand slipped from his. ‘Are there toilets here?’
‘No. Just go behind a tree.’ He smiled at the twins. ‘Find a wee tree.’
Sarah giggled. She was such a delight.
‘Come on.’ Antonia led the way into the trees.
***
Antonia’s routine settled over the following weeks. Jax had express-posted music and advice to get her ensemble started and she tried to wrangle seven small recorder players into shape on Mondays. Two sixth graders had begun flute lessons also on Mondays at school, which gave her a little bit of extra money to boost the wages from the cafe.
Her new counsellor, Anita, was serious and attentive, willing to see her when required but encouraging her to establish herself in the new life. ‘Do what you feel is right,’ she said. ‘Trust yourself and your instincts.’ Antonia hadn’t brought up the awkward question of Flynn yet.
Sarah and Jacob were happy with Miss Armstrong and were slowly making friends, although neither wanted to play separately from each other yet or visit someone else’s house. Simon came to visit three days per week, collecting the twins from school and they’d all been out to the cooperative several times.
Flynn dropped in to the cafe for coffee or sometimes lunch once or twice a week at most. He hadn’t invited the family out again, which wasn’t surprising but just a tiny bit disappointing. The picnic had been very successful and she thought he’d enjoyed himself. Maybe he had but it was a one-off thing and he meant what he’d said about getting in Simon’s way. Or he’d discovered she wasn’t a very interesting companion after all.
He certainly didn’t linger when he came to the cafe.
From the gossip she picked up from customers and at school, the resort proposal had gone off the radar. The council hadn’t announced anything beyond a vague statement saying they were looking into all the angles and no decisions had been made. It was early days.
Bron, next door, was friendly and always ready for a chat if they saw each other but she was busy, as was Antonia. The old man on the other side was virtually a recluse. Bron said his name was Josef Popovic. He played classical music loudly in the afternoons, which she quite enjoyed when she and the children came home after work and school but she hadn’t spoken to him, and both times she went over to introduce herself he didn’t answer her knock. She’d left homemade shortbread on the step the first time and it had disappeared when she looked later, so presumably he’d eaten it and knew it was from her. She’d only seen him once through the side window, tottering out with his bin on garbage collection day, a white-haired figure in a blue cardigan with stick-like legs in baggy grey pants.
Despite running out to say hello, she missed him again. It occurred to her he might have heard the screen door bang and run himself—back into the house. The bushes on the fence screened her driveway from his so she couldn’t verify her suspicion.
She’d been to Cheryl’s with the twins and they’d had cups of tea while the children played. Cheryl had invited her to join the local book group but she’d had to decline because of the baby-sitting problem. The twins weren’t ready to stay at home at night with someone else, even Simon.
Six weeks after she’d first come to Flynn’s Crossing, on a slow Tuesday morning at the cafe, her phone rang. Her dad? Mum? Private caller.
‘Hello.’
‘Hello, Antonia, how are you getting on? Keith McBride here.’ The detective she didn’t know existed until last year but who had spent much of the previous five years trying to find her.
Hoping she’d covered the surprise, she glanced at Cath. ‘Hello. I’m fine, we’re doing well. Hang on a minute.’
Cath raised her eyebrows. She’d think there was a family disaster because no one ever called her at work. Antonia covered the phone with her free hand. ‘Sorry, I have to take this.’
‘Anything wrong?’
‘No, nothing like that. But …’
‘Go on.’ Cath grinned. She’d think it was Flynn. For some reason she harboured the bel
ief there was something going on between them. There wasn’t.
She went out the back to the small yard where the bins were kept. Detective McBride wasn’t ringing to have a friendly chat. Something had happened.
‘Sorry, I’m at work. What’s up?’
‘The prosecution is preparing to go to trial and want to interview you.’
The trial. Antonia’s chest tightened. Face him? Have his eyes on her while she spoke? She had to. She swallowed. ‘Okay. And Dad and Jax?’
‘Yes. The prosecution will call on all of you. I phoned to give you a heads-up. Someone from their office will be contacting you soon. Probably Michael Hodge.’
‘I’d rather go there than have him come here.’ Impossible to keep a visit like that private. Speculation would run riot about the big city man in a suit who came calling.
‘That’s fine. You can arrange that when he calls.’
‘Have they set a trial date yet?’
‘No, they’ve had a preliminary hearing to charge him but the trial won’t be till later this year, or even early next year. There’s a lot of evidence to gather. He’s charged with a variety of things, including the murder of the baby’s mother and two other women.’
‘Did you find out who she was, Esther’s mother?’
‘Yes, she was a runaway named Erin Bruce … we found several bodies buried in the bush. The poor girl was from Wagga.’ Sadness mixed with disgust and despair carried through the phone connection.
Her mouth twisted and a rush of salty tears jammed in the back of her throat. It could so easily have been her. And her babies. Hannah had saved all their lives.
She never wanted to think about him again but she knew she had to go to that trial when it came, give her evidence, make sure Murdoch never took a breath in freedom again.
‘It won’t be pleasant revisiting it all, Antonia, but we want to put this guy away for good.’
‘Do you need all of us to testify to do that?’
‘The more the better. We have to prove he kept you there by force.’
‘He did.’ How could anyone dispute that?
‘I know he did, but we have to prove it. He’ll say you went with him of your own free will and he cared for you and the children for all those years.’
‘And Hannah and Izzy?’
‘Hannah might be in trouble herself. The prosecution are pushing for her to be charged as an accessory.’
‘What? But she was as much a captive as I was. As Izzy was. Without her I could have died in childbirth.’ What sort of justice was that?
‘They’ll argue she assisted him in the abductions over a long period of time. Without her you wouldn’t have been there in the first place.’
‘She had no choice. None of us did. We had to protect our children.’
‘That’s what you need to say.’
‘Okay. Did you find Billy and his wife?’ His cousin and helper, the one who stole cars to facilitate abductions and who ran Jax off the road on her bike—although that was never proven.
‘No, they’ve disappeared without trace. You don’t need to worry about them. Without Murdoch, they’ll be running scared and are probably in another state by now.’
‘I hope so.’
‘Stay strong, Antonia. Connor said you have a nice house and that Simon is very happy to have you up there. How are the twins?’
‘They’re fine. They love it here and they’re making friends at school. They’re learning to play and be cheeky. Be normal.’
‘I’m glad, really glad that it’s working out.’
‘It is. Thank you.’
Antonia went back inside with emotions churning and her head full of images and memories she thought locked away. Settling in Flynn’s Crossing had done what she’d wanted—allowed her to forge a new life. Stupid, really, when she knew a trial would be coming at some stage, but it was in the future, unset in time. She hadn’t prepared for the reality of reliving those events in minute detail and being cross-questioned and doubted. Just the thought of going back made her sick to the stomach. And the thought of Billy still on the loose was very disquieting.
‘Everything all right?’ Len put down the knife and the tomato he’d been slicing.
Should she confide in him, and Cath? She might have to one day. If the trial hit the news as it surely would, her name and her face would appear on TV, online, in the newspapers. How would she explain her silence? She needed to talk to Simon and her father. And Anita.
‘I have to go to Sydney for a while, I think. I’m not sure when.’
‘Righto, love.’ Len resumed his salad preparations. ‘Just as long as you come back. We need you.’ He gave her a big toothy smile.
‘Thanks. I’ll definitely come back. This is my home now.’
But how would her new friends react to the news they had a person with her past in their midst? And the twins. They’d be tainted. They’d all be stared at and talked about, maybe pitied; certainly her actions and choices would be dissected by all and sundry. If there’s one thing small communities loved, it was gossip.
Antonia went through to the cafe where Cath was putting a slice of carrot cake on a plate.
‘Problems?’ she asked.
Antonia shook her head.
‘Table five,’ said Cath, indicating the cake and pot of tea on the counter. ‘Then take Flynn’s order, please. Corner booth.’
A booth? Unusual. His normal seat was one of the stools at the counter so he could drink his espresso quickly and move on. He had a folder open on the table, which he closed when she approached.
‘Good morning.’ Blue eyes met hers with a sizzle of awareness but her smile couldn’t match his. Not today.
‘Hello.’
‘Are you okay?’ Concern clouded his face. ‘Antonia? What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing … I … I have to go to Sydney.’
‘Is someone ill?’
‘No, it’s nothing like that. I’m not sure when.’ She forced a smile. ‘What can I get you?’
‘Coffee and a Mediterranean focaccia, please. You’d tell me, wouldn’t you, if you need help in some way?’
‘Sure.’ Tell Flynn she’d been held captive, raped and abused by that man for years? No way, not in a million years.
Chapter 10
Flynn watched Antonia walk away, her dark hair in a ponytail bouncing like a schoolgirl’s as she moved. She’d just lied to him and it was like a stab to the heart. What was going on? Whatever it was, it was something she didn’t want to share with him. He knew she didn’t feel the same way as he did about her, that she regarded him as a friend; but he’d thought their friendship was developing, based on a measure of trust. He was wrong.
He opened the folder and stared blindly at the sheet of words and figures Baldessin had sent in regard to the ideal type of property he was looking for. Antonia would confide in Simon and ask his advice about her problem but she knew him about as well as she knew Flynn, if you discounted that they’d known each other as teenagers. People changed a lot as they matured. They’d both be different now.
He sucked in air and exhaled fiercely. What was he thinking? Why get twisted up about what she thought and did when he knew nothing would come of it? He had a stupid crush that would go away eventually and wouldn’t lead to any sort of dalliance in the short term because she wasn’t interested. Enough said. Finito!
The papers Sean had sent detailed the first stage project. He had state government interest as well, which made it even more desirable for the town to succeed in attracting his investment. Tourism was a growth industry and the National Park had a lot to offer. If only the co-op could be persuaded to sell off part of their land. Impossible. Rufus and Georgia were deadset against it, Aidan was too but in a less aggressive way. Bernie was against it. Lauren was a recent arrival but she was strongly opposed with a loud voice. Simon? Simon wasn’t a fighter but he might be roused to it if the home he loved was threatened. Who wouldn’t be?
Antonia slid his coffee
onto the table and went away before he could say thank you.
Where did her allegiance lie? With Simon, no doubt. She said she didn’t know anything about business but she was happy in Flynn’s Crossing and was making this her home. What would she do if the cooperative was sold and Simon moved away? He shook his head and picked up the coffee. Not his concern. This was a business proposition pure and simple. It would benefit the town for many years to some and that outweighed any personal considerations. As head of the council, it was his job to do the right thing by the community as a whole.
The meeting a week after the lunch with Sean had been surprisingly harmonious. At the start. Sean had charmed Judy and impressed Bill and Walter. Aidan had admitted the bloke had some good ideas in regard to the environment, he liked him but there was no suitable land available for the development he had in mind. The government wasn’t going to allow a commercial resort on National Park land but had no plans of their own for the area.
‘It’s a good idea but he’ll have to go somewhere else.’
‘We don’t want Whiterock or anyone else to benefit from our idea and our legwork,’ Margie said in exasperation. ‘They’ve done nothing towards it.’
Aidan shrugged, which infuriated her even more.
‘Yours is a very selfish attitude, Aidan. You’re never going to use three-quarters of the land you own and you know it. Why not let the whole town benefit from it?’
‘It’s not just my attitude,’ said Aidan. ‘We’re a cooperative. We make decisions together. No one wants to sell the land.’
‘Not even for the right amount of money?’ asked Phil. ‘Baldessin has very deep pockets.’
‘I’m not going to dignify that with an answer.’ Aidan’s jaw tightened.
‘All right,’ said Flynn. ‘We’re not getting anywhere now. Why don’t we say that the block next to the co-op is the only viable area. You never know he might be able to get the government to agree to using a bit of the National Park on the other side.’
‘I’m sure he’ll give it a shot,’ said Judy. ‘And he’ll probably succeed. Governments are always amenable to a bit of flexibility where money for them is concerned. Retaining the environment is way down the list when it comes to a lucrative deal.’
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