by Alexis Davie
“What?” she gasped, her green eyes widening in shock. “You’re firing me from band?”
Andy quickly shook his head.
“Think of it as a break,” he replied hurriedly. “I’m starting to believe that maybe you’re under too much stress, and maybe you’re taking it out on everyone else. Just take a breather for a week or two and come back when you’re feeling a little bit more relaxed, okay?”
Erin could not believe what she was hearing.
And in the meantime, she thought, everyone is going to know that I was let go? No one will take me seriously when I come back!
She glared her blazing eyes at Andy.
“If I leave, I’m not coming back,” she threatened. “You’ll have to find someone to replace me on flute.”
Andy seemed to swallow a sigh as he averted his dark eyes downward. “Erin,” he said, “I think it’s best for everyone if you take a—”
“I heard you the first time,” Erin snapped. “And I just told you that if you insist on doing this, I am not coming back.”
She tried to maintain his gaze, but he could not meet her eyes.
“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way. But…” Andy trailed off, his sentence hanging in the air between them.
Erin felt her face flush, and she bit on her lower lip, certain a stream of profanity was about to escape.
He’s not sorry. I bet they have all been looking for a way to get rid of me since day one. Jealousy is an ugly thing, she thought, enraged.
“Fine,” she replied quietly, determined to keep her composure. “If you’ve already made your decision, I can’t argue, can I?”
She whirled around and began to walk away from the room she had spent endless hours in, always doing her best. Maybe she had been harsh, but she wanted to be a part of something great, and she always felt like she pushed people to reach their full potential.
“Erin, don’t be angry!” Andy called after her. “You’re so talented, and—”
His last words were lost as she pushed her way out of the music hall and into the cool early autumn night.
Erin’s head was a mess as she rushed across campus, trying to reconcile what had just occurred in her mind.
I spoke the truth and I got cast out of the band. Is this happening?
A deep anger began to grow inside her, and Erin’s pace increased as she crossed through the brightly lit quad.
I just got fired for the first time in my life, she realized. She wondered if it was an omen of worse to come. She turned her gaze upward, as if to silently yell at the heavens, and she froze mid-step.
Something was soaring through the thin, barely visible clouds above her head.
What is that?
Her eyes tried desperately to adjust to the formation. It was larger than any bird she had ever seen, but what else could it be? Certainly not a plane—it seemed to have a wide wingspan, though the distance was far too great for Erin to define it.
Suddenly, it seemed to pause, its head turning toward her as though it could sense her staring.
Erin gasped aloud as eyes as green as hers bored through the void between them.
Was it… was it a dragon?
Without warning, the beast let out a silent cry and vanished as if it had never been there.
Her pulse thudding, Erin peered throughout the sky again, seeking out the strange creature, but it was nowhere to be seen.
Did I imagine that? She wondered, willing her heart to slow while she cautiously began walking again, her neck still craned toward the sky. Gulping back her awe, she picked up her pace, suddenly feeling vulnerable in the open space between the buildings.
I need a drink, Erin told herself. I’m seeing hawks and thinking they’re dragons.
* * *
Another text came in as Erin sat at the dimly lit piano bar, but she ignored it. She suddenly had no interest in talking to anyone. Besides, Grassy Green’s was one of Erin’s favorite and lesser-known haunts, especially during her bad times, and she didn’t want anyone to disturb her.
She just wanted some time to think about everything that happened. Erin was assertive and knew what she wanted out of life, and she wasn’t afraid to go after it. Even though Andy treated her like she was a royal pain in the ass and thought her behavior was too severe, that wasn’t her true nature.
Erin was kind, loving, and would do anything in the world for people she cared about—and that included members of the band. If she went back home, she would have to face her sorority sisters, and in that moment, she didn’t want to plaster a smile and her face and pretend like her spirit wasn’t crushed.
It was funny how, in half an hour, her entire outlook had changed, and not exactly for the better. At least, it didn’t feel like it had been better.
No, Erin concluded, turning off her phone and placing it face-down on the bar. I will stay here and wallow alone.
Seductive and slow jazz music piped through the speakers as the bartender approached her. Erin noted that he eyed her appreciatively.
“Are you old enough to be in here?” he asked teasingly. “I don’t want to get arrested.”
Despite her dark mood, Erin smiled coyly. “Oh, that’s too bad,” she replied. “I like a bad boy.”
The man laughed and leaned over the bar, his blue eyes twinkling. “What will it be, Erin?”
“Double vodka martini with an olive,” Erin answered. “Shaken.”
Colin, the bartender, released a low whistle. “Rough day?” he asked, turning back to fix her concoction. “I know you only save the doubles for the big guns.”
Erin suppressed a reply, knowing it would come out with all the venom she held in the pit of her stomach. But it was not in her nature to unleash, regardless of what the people from band thought. She was composed, elegant. She did not lose it in public, no matter how tempting it might be.
“I’ve had better days,” she said, shrugging. “But it’s nothing your martinis won’t fix, Colin.”
There was no need for her schoolmate to know about her humiliation. There would be enough time to deal with that later, when her termination became public knowledge.
No, tonight would be about licking her wounds and regrouping.
I don’t need the school’s music department, she decided. I’ll join a private group, with real musicians who take pride in their work. Brianne and Andy can have each other.
“Want to talk about it?” Colin pressed, but Erin shook her stylish dark hair and sat back to take in the bar.
It was a Tuesday night, so the quaint bistro bar only held a sprinkling of patrons, despite its proximity to the college. That was the reason Erin had chosen it that night. She knew there were less chances of running into someone she knew there.
As Colin poured her drink into a frosted martini glass, Erin turned her head back to him and spoke the first words that came into her mind.
“I saw a hawk outside,” she told him. “Biggest one I’ve ever seen.”
The statement sounded inane when she said it aloud, and Erin wondered why she had mentioned it at all. Did she really have nothing else to talk about?
Colin’s dark eyebrow rose in polite interest. “Well, this is Colorado,” he replied, smiling. “We do have big birds.”
Erin immediately felt foolish for having said anything. You need a distraction, she chided herself. You’re rambling about birds to take your mind off what Andy said.
Colin slid her order onto the bar.
“Start a tab?” he asked.
The front door opened, and Erin’s didn’t answer as her attention was on the man who had just entered the establishment.
She was certain she had never seen him before. She would have remembered his chiseled features and full mouth; yet there was something familiar about him, and she could not tear her eyes from his profile as he seated himself on the opposite end of the bar without so much as a glance anywhere but downward.
“Well,” Colin breathed, staring at the man. “A blond god among
us.”
Erin nodded in agreement, casting him a sidelong look. “Yours or mine?” she asked, and Colin shrugged.
“There’s only one way to find out,” he responded, winking as he swaggered off toward the stranger.
During one of the first times she had come there, Erin had found out that Colin was gay, and sometimes they both found themselves attracted to the same patron. More often than not, they simply watched from afar, but with this particular man, there was no way they wouldn’t approach him.
Erin found her eyes glued to them, as if trying to memorize every feature of the newcomer.
His attractiveness went beyond a head of thick, wavy hair and high cheekbones, but Erin was having difficulty pinpointing what elusive quality of his kept her own green eyes fixated upon him. There was a certain aloofness to him, a quiet dignity that Erin wanted to break into.
She watched as Colin leaned across the countertop to speak with the man, but she could not hear what they were saying.
Oh, please be straight, she pleaded, gritting her teeth. Let something go right for me this evening.
Erin waited with baited breath as Colin turned away, his face falling with disappointment, and a stab of elation coursed through her.
The distraction she had ordered had arrived.
Thank you, Universe, she called silently, fully turning her body toward the newcomer.
“He’s all yours,” Colin muttered sullenly as he walked by.
“Put his drink on my tab,” she told him without shifting her gaze. She was willing him to look at her, but he seemed consumed with whatever he was doing.
He’s probably some suit waiting on news of a deal, Erin surmised, gauging his age at about twenty-five. He certainly didn’t seem to be a college student.
Colin muttered something incoherent, and Erin grinned genuinely for the first time since before band practice. She didn’t need to hear the words to know that Colin was being a sore loser. She watched as he placed the man’s drink on the bar in front of him. From the bartender’s hand gestures, she could see he was explaining that she had bought the drink.
Erin held her smile, expecting him to raise the glass in thanks and invite her to join him.
To her absolute shock, he did neither. He simply lowered his head, taking a sip of his drink as he pulled his cell out of the breast pocket of his button-down shirt.
What the hell? Erin thought furiously, glaring at Colin as he walked by.
“Did you tell him I bought him the drink?” she demanded.
He nodded his head. “Yeah.”
“What did he say?” she barked.
“Nothing,” he replied. “He seems pretty quiet, Erin.”
“Is he wearing a wedding ring?” she questioned, trying to make one out on his left hand, but her angle was off.
“Nope,” Colin assured her. “Not that I could see, anyway.”
So, she thought, her ego shattering with each passing second, he’s just not interested in me.
She gaped at Colin and then turned back to see if the man was sneaking a look in her direction. However, he seemed oblivious to her altogether, and Erin unexpectedly found it was hard to breathe.
Is tonight a bad dream? she wondered, shaking her head as if trying to wake up. First it was band practice, and now I’m being blatantly ignored by this guy? No way this is real.
But it appeared to be so, and Erin simply sat there, fuming as the injustice of the night grew on her.
At some point, she couldn’t take it anymore. She slipped off her stool.
“What are you doing?” Colin hissed. “I don’t think he wants to be bothered, Erin.”
“I don’t care,” she replied haughtily, snatching her purse from the chair with one hand and grasping her drink with the other. “It’s rude not to thank someone for a drink.”
Colin groaned. Even though he was familiar with her go-getter personality, Erin could tell he didn’t approve of her current methods.
“Erin, I have a bad feeling about this,” he muttered after her, but she did not heed his warning.
She sashayed toward the man, ensuring that her heels made lots of noise against the pristine tiles to forewarn him of her arrival. Nonetheless, he barely glanced at her as she slipped onto the stool beside him.
“How’s your drink?” Erin asked, and he peeked at her with vivid green eyes.
She felt her heart pause as she recalled the creature she had seen, with its stunningly bright eyes flying above her head.
What is it with you and that damned bird? Focus! she chided herself.
“Fine,” the stranger mumbled, partially turning his shoulders away from her, as if to discourage further conversation. Erin was not having it. She had not gotten as far as she had in life by taking “no” for an answer.
“I’m Erin,” she offered, willing him to look at her.
The man nodded stiffly but did not look at her, nor did he provide his name.
Erin felt a spark of frustration course through her body.
“You know, when someone buys you a drink, it’s customary to say thank you,” she told him, trying to keep the annoyance from her voice.
Slowly, he raised his intense green eyes and stared at her.
“Thank you,” he almost whispered, and his face immediately returned to the screen in his hands.
Erin’s brow furrowed uncomprehendingly, and she could do nothing but peer at him. She had never been met with such a level of resistance, much less from a man.
He’s obviously not interested, a rational voice in her head said. Just cut your losses and go back to your seat.
But it was simply not in Erin’s nature, and she couldn’t bring herself to move. She took a sip of her martini, leaning her elbows on the bar, feeling defeated but unwilling to let it go.
Abruptly, the man rose from his stool, and Erin watched as he made his way back to the single bathrooms at the rear of the bar.
Erin saw her chance and instantly seized it.
“Woah!” Colin called, realizing what she was going to do. “You can’t follow that guy to the bathroom! It’s creepy, not to mention stalker-ish!”
She ignored him. Although she knew that what she was doing was wrong, she had to know for certain that the guy wasn’t interested.
I don’t even know this guy’s name, and yet I’m going after him to prove I can, she thought, shaking her head.
Erin also knew that if she hadn’t suffered such a massive blow to her pride that night, she would not have done such a lecherous thing, but she felt like she couldn’t stop herself.
I’m not doing anything, she reasoned. I’m just trying to talk to the guy.
It was more difficult to convince herself than she’d thought.
She leaned against the door to the men’s washroom, waiting for it to swing inward. When it did, she was ready, stepping inside and pushing the blond stranger back with her.
The man’s brow knitted in confusion.
“What are you doing?” he gasped, his jade eyes wide.
“Why are you ignoring me?” Erin demanded, all coquettishness long gone. “I bought you a drink and you didn’t even say thank you! What is wrong with you? Are you that full of yourself?”
He gaped at her, his face coloring beneath her steely gaze.
“I–I’m not…” he stuttered, and it was only until his eyes dropped in nervousness that Erin realized what the issue was: he wasn’t an egotistical jerk—he was shy.
She almost laughed, managing to hold herself back from doing so as she allowed her head to fall back in relief.
“What’s your name?” she asked, her tone softening.
“Spence,” he mumbled, and Erin’s grin widened.
“Nice to meet you, Spence,” she murmured, noting his cheeks flushing crimson as she neared him.
“You…” Spence swallowed, clearing his throat. “You said your name was Erin, right?”
“Yes,” Erin said.
“I’m—” He cleared his throa
t again.
Erin couldn’t help finding his nervousness slightly endearing. Of course she had caused such a reaction in quite a fair share of men, but this was the first time said reaction was displayed so openly. She felt flattered, even.
“I’m sorry about before,” he told her, his voice small. “I… I kind of thought I was dreaming. How come such a beautiful girl was talking to me?”
Erin’s eyes widened. “Have you looked at yourself in a mirror lately?”
Spence’s cheeks grew even redder, and he let out a soft, nervous chuckle. For a few moments, neither of them said anything, though Erin was glad that at least her attraction wasn’t one-sided. Finally, Spence spoke again.
“I really want to kiss you,” he said. “Would it be okay if I did?”
Erin didn’t respond. At least, not with words. She closed the distance between them and pressed her lips to his, her hands grasping his strong arms, savoring the gasp he let out at her actions.
His hands moved to grip her hips with nervous reluctance, but he used that grip to pull Erin closer, their bodies pressed together almost from head to toe. Erin moaned into their kiss, and she sighed when she felt Spence’s fingers move to the hem of her blouse and stay there, as though he were asking permission to remove it.
She pulled back from his sweet, delicious mouth long enough to nod her head.
“It’s okay,” Erin whispered. She slipped her own hand over his belt buckle, lowering her fingers against his crotch.
Spence looked up at her, shock and desire swirling through his green eyes, and Erin nodded in encouragement. His hands undid the buttons of her blouse to expose her lace bra before they came to rest—gently, almost shyly—upon her perky beasts.
“You can kiss them,” she whispered, wanting to urge him on. His hands trembled for a moment, but suddenly he seemed to find a new bravery, fueled by passion.
Spence’s grip hardened against her breasts and his head nuzzled into her chest, his lips falling onto the swelling curve of her bosom as he moved his hands to her rear, yanking her closer.
Erin let out a small yelp. “Oh, there you go,” she coaxed him, drawing his head against her.