by Jaci Burton
Dax leaned into her, his cock searching between her parted legs. She reached between them and guided him to the entrance. He plunged inside with a single, hard stroke and she cried out, wrapping her legs around him. This was completion, fulfillment, all those things people spoke about sex. Only it wasn't the physical pleasure she felt the most--it was the joining of their souls and it tore her apart.
Her pussy throbbed, tiny quakes squeezing his shaft until he was deeply embedded inside her.
Passion took over and no more words were necessary. Dax reached underneath her and grabbed her buttocks, pulling her snug against him. Her clit brushed against his shaft as he moved in and out of her with rapid strokes. The wave began to build inside her again and she clutched his back, her nails scraping his flesh until he growled and buried his face in her neck.
When he sank his teeth into her tender skin, she shivered and screamed, the pain and pleasure mingling to drive her to the brink of sanity. And still he drove inside her without pause until she couldn't think, couldn't breathe, couldn't do anything but feel the sensations soaring through every part of her body.
You're mine, Dax. You always will be. Maybe he heard her, maybe he didn't. At this point she didn't care. Tears rolled down her face as the depth of her love for him mixed with her desire.
He tensed against her and thrust deeply, so hard she felt it in her womb, so deliciously intense it toppled her into a climax that shattered her into pieces. He came along with her, their cries of ecstasy mingling until she didn't know where she ended and he began.
They'd no more recovered their breath when he made love to her again, this time more slowly. The entire time they were joined Dax watched her, his gaze focused on hers, their lips and tongues mingling in kisses so tender she couldn't hold back the tears. He kissed away every drop that fell, taking her over and over again to the pinnacle and beyond, until she fell into exhausted slumber, their bodies tangled together.
It was still dark in the room when she woke again, and yet Isabelle knew it was dawn. She turned over but Dax wasn't in bed with her. The pillow where he'd laid his head was cold, no warmth from his body left on the pillowcase. Quickly, she threw off the sheet and stepped into the living room, but he wasn't there, either.
She searched the bungalow and couldn't find him. Her heart beat frantically as she dressed and opened the front door to step onto the beach.
Gray clouds sailed overhead, signaling a coming storm. No wonder her bedroom had been so dark. Daylight fought to break through the gathering clouds. The wind whipped her hair against her cheeks, the stinging bite of salt spray blinding her progress to the water's edge.
He was gone, had left her sometime early this morning while she slept. She'd known it the minute she woke, had felt the emptiness inside her but didn't want to acknowledge it yet. She'd needed a few more minutes of denial.
And she remembered. Dax was gone, but he'd left her memories intact. He trusted her not to reveal his secrets. His faith in her was humbling and overwhelming.
A loss unlike anything she'd ever experienced crushed her heart. Her father's abandonment didn't compare. Rage and pain and frustration mixed inside her, a rumble as fierce as the thunder in the distance.
Rain began to fall in huge droplets, soaking her. The downpour mixed with her tears, falling quickly into the sand at her feet.
She knelt in the wet sand, covered her face and sobbed.
Chapter Fifteen
Isabelle sat numbly in the chair at the ocean's edge, staring at the cresting waves of the sea.
The storm had rushed through quickly, leaving a steamy, sunny day in its wake. Sweat poured off her body, traveling in rivulets to the sand below.
And still, she didn't move. Paralyzed by grief, she couldn't bring herself to do what needed to be done. The thought of packing, of gathering up her things and leaving the island, brought a fresh bout of tears that she couldn't seem to stem.
For someone who had rarely cried in her lifetime, she'd sure pulled forth the water works lately.
Maybe because this time her heart was involved. The last time she remembered this aching pain was when her father had abandoned them. Even then it was different. Even despair over her mother's pain had been nothing like what she felt now.
This was her first love, her first heartache, and she wasn't certain she'd survive it.
Now, staring out at the ocean that had always filled her with life, she felt empty. The ocean held nothing that appealed to her any longer. The thought of diving without Dax at her side stabbed her with nearly unbearable pain.
She turned her gaze sharply toward the path in the rain forest as the sound of a motorized golf cart caught her attention. For the briefest of seconds she envisioned Dax riding out of the jungle, his typically wicked grin plastered on his gorgeous face.
But it wasn't Dax. Pushing aside the disappointment that dropped her heart to her feet, Isabelle smiled at Morgan. Morgan waved and stopped the cart in front of her bungalow, then walked down to the water's edge. Isabelle motioned to the other chair next to hers and Morgan sat.
"Checking out today?" she asked.
Isabelle nodded, trying not to think about it. "Yes. Did you need me to get a move on?"
"No, not at all. I just stopped by to ask you how you enjoyed your stay."
She looked at the ocean. "It was heaven. I don't want to go."
Morgan laid a hand on her arm. "You can stay awhile longer, if you'd like. The bungalow isn't booked for the next week."
Isabelle turned her head and tried her best to smile. "No, thank you. I need to get back to work anyway."
"Dax checked out early this morning," Morgan said.
At the mention of his name, a rolling knot formed in the pit of her stomach. "I know."
"I thought maybe you two would end up together."
Isabelle managed a weak laugh. "Not quite."
"Hmm."
"What?"
Morgan shrugged. "It's just that you and Dax seemed to be more than just an island fling."
Island fling? Morgan didn't know the half of it. But it was still interesting to hear her observation. "It was more than an island fling. Unfortunately, we live in two different worlds."
And that was the understatement of the year.
"So? How do you feel about him?"
"I love him," she said before she could stop the words from spilling out of her mouth.
Morgan raised a brow. "Then make it work."
"I can't."
Morgan inhaled deeply and offered a patient smile. "Honey, I've been where you are. In love with a man and thinking no way in hell was it going to work."
"What did you do?"
"I married him and am having his baby," she said with a contented grin.
"You and Tony."
She nodded.
"How did you make it work?"
"We both had to give. I wasn't willing to give up my life, and neither was he, but we both finally realized that neither of us was complete without the other. It's funny how we can decide our career and our current lives are so important. Until you're faced with losing the person you love. So we made it work."
"And has it?"
Morgan laughed. "I'm not saying it hasn't been difficult at times, but our love keeps us strong, keeps us bonded together. Whatever the obstacles, we've overcome them together."
Isabelle trembled at Morgan's words, tears welling anew. She fought them back, refusing to give in to the melancholy of loss threatening to overwhelm her.
Morgan seemed to sense her tenuous hold and patted her arm before standing. "Just think about it. I'll be at the hotel if you need to talk to someone."
"Thank you," she said, grateful that at least one person knew of her struggle.
After Morgan left, Isabelle went inside the bungalow and packed, her thoughts occupied with Dax and her inability to commit to him and his life under the sea.
Was she wrong? Would she be able to live with the regret of not going with
him?
No. He lived in the ocean, for God's sake. She wasn't like him, could never be like him, and damned if she'd follow a man like her mother had, giving up everything she knew for love.
Oh sure. It would be great to start, then as the years went by Dax would grow more and more disillusioned with her. Just like her father had with her mother.
Love didn't last. At least not in her limited experience.
So, she'd just go back to Texas and continue her work and her teaching. She'd have to be satisfied with her career as the number one love in her life.
Right?
She looked over at the pillow where Dax had laid his head last night. At first she hesitated, then finally reached out for it and pulled it toward her face.
His scent still lingered. Crisp and fresh like the sea. She closed her eyes and willed back the soaring pain of regret, then sat on the bed, clutching the pillow to her middle.
Dax loved her. No, he'd never said it outright to her, but she'd heard him tell Ronan that night before she passed out. And he was probably just as hesitant to utter the words as she had been.
Maybe he was as afraid as she was. Or maybe he'd given her the opportunity to make her own decision about living with him without his declaration of love to cloud her judgment.
Oh God, why wasn't this easy?
She already knew the answer. Because she was terrified. Never had she been faced with declaring her love for a man. A man she'd opened her heart to, a man she adored with all her being.
Cowardice wasn't a word she'd use to describe herself.
In her work, she was fearless, but have her heart involved and she'd cower in a corner like a frightened child. Is that really what she wanted for herself? To live her life so anxious about being hurt that she was reluctant to love?
With an angry toss the pillow went sailing across the bed.
No, this wasn't what she wanted. But it was the life she'd chosen. Dax was long gone and she wouldn't go after him again. She'd hurt him already, told him without words that she didn't care enough about him to stay. If she changed her mind now, he'd just think she was flighty, like she really didn't know what she wanted. And honestly, she didn't know.
There just weren't enough guarantees.
With a resigned sigh she finished her packing and placed her luggage in the golf cart. Knowing she shouldn't but unable to resist, she took one last walk to the ocean's edge, digging her toes into the surf.
The wind whipped around her legs. She glanced up at the gray clouds marching quickly along the sky.
Another storm was coming in.
She took one long, last look at the turquoise water, wishing for sunlight, wishing for that glint off the surface, wishing for...
For what? For Dax to magically appear, tell her he loved her and that he'd live in her world? That he'd make all her dreams come true by sacrificing his way of life for hers?
Yeah, right.
"I'm sorry, Dax," she whispered to the water. "Sorry I don't have enough faith in love to make the choice to live in your world. But I do love you. I have since the moment I met you, and I always will."
On a shaky sigh, she blew a kiss out onto the water, feeling silly and yet loath to turn away and leave.
For a brief moment the sun peeked through the thickening clouds, casting its rays across the ocean's surface. Something crossed her line of vision.
Isabelle blinked, then closed her eyes, refusing to believe she'd seen a spot on the water.
No. You did not see anything. Wishful thinking. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Turn away, don't look back.
She looked again, and saw an object bobbing out on the water, too far away to make out what it was. Her heart stopped beating and her fingers curled into tight balls of tension at her side.
It couldn't be.
The object moved toward the shore. Toward her. Blond hair glinted in the sunlight, strong arms sweeping in and out of the water.
She clutched her chest, her heart pounding so hard she could hear the roar of her blood in her ears.
Frozen to the sand, she couldn't move, unable to believe what she saw.
Move, damn you. Go to him. Tell him how you feel. You've been given a second chance, don't screw this up.
Fear held her in place and she fought against it. Her life turned before her eyes. What did she want?
Dax. Dammit to hell, she wanted Dax. And screw anything that would get in her way. She wasn't her mother. She was stronger, much stronger, and she loved. By God, she loved this man and she'd fight to be with him. Fight herself and her own doubts, if she had to.
The fear anchoring her in place dissolved in the water lapping at her feet. She jumped into the surf, heedless of the dress now soaked and clinging to her body.
Propelled as if by motor she soared through the water, closing the distance between them.
This wasn't happening fast enough. Her body ached for his touch and she couldn't wait to get her hands on him, her mouth on him. She had so much to tell him, so many things to declare, the first thing being her love for him.
The clouds hovered overhead, obliterating the sun. Rain fell in sheets, the sudden storm whipping at her, preventing her from making any progress in the churning water.
But Dax could. She finally stopped and treaded, gulping in mouthfuls of salty sea as she struggled to stay afloat.
Her eyes widened as she watched him sail through the water as if he had a motor attached to his feet. No one could swim that fast! In seconds he was by her side, his arms snaking around her waist and pulling her underneath.
She opened her mouth and took the ocean into her lungs. In seconds, she could breathe again.
Before she could utter a word Dax's lips closed over hers in a searing kiss that finally cracked the shell she'd constructed around her heart. She pulled away to tell him everything she'd been dying to tell him, but before she could utter the words, he spoke first.
"I love you, Isabelle. I need you. My life isn't complete without you."
Then came the tears again. "I love you too, Dax. I want to--"
"Wait. Let me," he interrupted.
She nodded, near to bursting with the words she'd longed to say to him.
"I'm leaving the ocean," he said.
His words at first not registering, she blurted, "I need to tell you ...what? What did you just say?"
He drew her hand in his, kissing her knuckles, then turned his gaze to hers. "I'm leaving the ocean. I don't want to be separated again."
"You can't leave the ocean, Dax."
"Sure I can," he replied with a grin. "I do it all the time."
"Not permanently. What about your work, what you do down here?"
"Doesn't matter. I love you too much to lose you."
Could it be possible? Could she have found a man willing to give up his life to be with her? She heard his words and believed them to be true, and yet couldn't fathom he could love her enough to leave his world for hers.
She thought this was what she wanted. To have Dax living in her world. But now that he'd made the offer, she realized it wasn't what she wanted at all.
Yes, she wanted to be with him, but not like this.
"No, Dax."
His brows knitted in confusion. "No? What do you mean no?"
"You can't live on land with me."
"Why not?"
She smiled at his wary expression. Her heart soared as she made the decision she knew in her heart was the right one. The one she wanted. "Because I want to live in the sea with you."
His jaw dropped. "You do?"
"Yes, I do. I love you, I want to be with you and the ocean has always been my home. I can't think of a better place to spend the rest of my life."
He caressed her shoulders and her body responded to his touch by warming, opening like a flower on a spring morning.
"What about your family? Your work?"
She shrugged. "My mother and I don't even connect on the same level. We rarely even speak to each other, let
alone visit."
"I'm sorry. I didn't know."
"It's okay. I can't live my life the way she did, anyway. She's been frozen in time, living in the past for over twenty years, wanting something she couldn't have. But maybe I can visit her now and then?"
Dax frowned. "I told you that's not possible. You can't go from living your life in the ocean to popping up on land. We don't allow it. Too much risk...too much opportunity for you to tell someone about your life down here. I know it's too much to ask of you, but maybe we can find a way to work it out so you can visit."
They'd work out the details on that later, she knew. If she wanted something badly enough, she'd fight for it no matter who this League was and how determined they were to tell her what to do. "And as far as my work, I'll quit my job. I've always wanted to be closer to the sea to do my research. How much closer can I get than right in the middle of it?" She finished with a hopeful smile.
He cupped her neck with his palm, his thumb grazing her jaw line. Isabelle shivered at his touch.
"I first saw you when you were a young girl."
Her heart skidded to a halt. "What?"
"You were on the beach in Puerto Rico, standing there with your mother. I'd guess you were maybe thirteen or fourteen, just beginning to grow into young womanhood."
Propelled back in time by the memories, she couldn't believe the destiny she'd caught a glimpse of back then. "That was you."
He nodded. "Yes."
"I remember. I saw you, and smiled at you. When I told my mother about it she said it was a figment of my imagination, but I never forgot about it. You were the reason I fell in love with the magic of the sea."
"I've loved you since that first moment, Isabelle."
She realized suddenly that she had, too. She'd waited her entire life for the mystery of the ocean to unfold before her, and now it had. Not only had the sea given her the career she loved, it had also given her the man she was destined to love.
"I really want you to think long and hard about this. It's a lot to ask of you to give your life up for me."
She shook her head, the realization making her giddy. "It's not too much to ask at all. It's what I want, Dax."
"But what about--"