by Nora Cobb
“I’m here, okay?” I reply. “Let’s just ignore each other if we can’t get along.”
Silas lets his towel slip an inch, and of course, my eyes go there. I can see every ridge of him and the small hairs peeking out over the hem. He leans in as I back away from him. This raunchy shit pisses me off. It’s a cheap trick and I’ve got a lot to learn.
“Just keep it inside,” I tell him as I storm off.
Chapter Two
When I first met Luna, I was the edgy one, but Luna has surpassed me. Thankfully, Silas has left her alone, and Luna has the good sense not to piss him off. She smiles and waves at the boys while I give out dirty looks. I never question why she’s nice to them. It’s self-preservation, but after a while Luna is getting more notice. And though we’re friends, there’s a slow wedge growing between us.
I walk into her bedroom, and Luna is modeling another new dress. It’s amazingly well constructed in a thick satin with a low sheen and cut on the bias that slims her hips even more. Luna poses in front of her mirror as if she’s flirting with her reflection.
“Where did you get that?” I ask.
She smiles at me in the mirror. “Johnnie Gilson. A fashion student. He wants me to model his stuff, and I told him I would for the price of a dress. He sent over three.”
She opens her closet, and it’s stuffed with clothes. My mouth drops open as my hands pull out tops and dresses. “This is some serious stuff.”
Luna holds a floral dress to her body. It’s cute, and she knows it.
“Wow, people just give you all this?” I ask.
“You can borrow anything you like,” she offers.
Being a hater isn’t me, so I decide to ask for Luna’s help instead. I’m still annoyed about my hair. Today, I have film history, and every time I see Silas, I want to slap him with my heavy book bag. I wish he didn’t arouse so much anger in me. Arouse isn’t the best word to use.
“If you were me,” I ask Luna, “how would you dress to intimidate a man?”
“Who are we talking about?” she asks.
“Silas.”
She places a polished nail on her chin and narrows her eyes. “I would dress like your daddy owns a tech empire, and by the way, he does.”
I look down at my worn jeans, and though my white T-shirt cost real money, it’s too plain to look like it did.
Luna sighs. “They think they can tear you down because you’ve already given them a helping hand by dressing like you’re depressed.” She grabs a jumpsuit out of her closet. The top is a bustier and the lower half is shorts. It’s lower cut than what I would normally wear.
I edge away from it. “I’m not sure about that.”
She sucks her teeth and scowls. “Don’t be like that. You can own this, but you better wear it with heels. Where’s your platinum wig?”
“It’s ninety degrees outside,” I reply. “Can’t we just comb my hair?”
Luna grabs me like she’s into discipline. “I’m not the one fighting with the popular boy on campus. We all know you don’t like him, and he’s using it against you. Disarm him with a little charm.”
“I know you’re right, but do I need to wear that?” I argue.
Luna hands me the school newspaper. The Redwood Times has the usual crap on the front page and canned articles inside. She grabs it out of my hands and turns to page twelve. It looks like an advice column, but it’s not. None of this is kind or meant to help.
Dear Misery, I like this girl, but she’s into her daddy. She gets worked up, but if you don’t include her in your fun times, she’s a prude. I watch her on JustFriends. But I want to touch her. What do I do? Signed, Forever a Slut
Dear Forever a Slut, Relax and smoke weed.
I get the reference, but I focus on the minutiae. “Smoke weed? And what the fuck is JustFriends?”
Luna cringes. “It’s a premium site. You don’t want to look at it.”
Obviously, the blind item is about me. Luna concentrates on my hair as I read the other items with morbid curiosity. I’m not the only one being dragged through it.
Dear Misery, He wants what he can’t have and weeps over it. I’ve moved on and it’s embarrassing my girlfriend. What do I say to him? Signed, Outback and Front.
Dear Outback and Front, Try a ménage.
I gawk. “Oh my God, is this about Theo?”
“Keep reading.” Luna pulls my hair back in a tight, tiny ponytail.
Dear Misery, I’m hot for teacher. And she’s hot for me. I just want some experience, not forever. How do I break up and score an A? Signed, Lonely on Top.
Dear Lonely on Top, You’re in too deep. Just stare at the ceiling and pray you graduate.
“Is this Chase?” I blurt out. I forget that I haven’t said a word to Luna.
Luna looks at the page but doesn’t ask for an explanation. “Nasty stuff,” she mutters, absorbed in what she’s doing.
“How do they get away with this stuff?” I ask.
“They pretend it’s an advice column,” she replies, “but it’s all made up by a group of people we see almost every day, walking in and out of this building.”
I shake my head as I continue to read. “This is wrong.”
“A lot of things are wrong, but the problem is they think they’re right.” Luna’s gaze meets mine in the mirror as she slips the wig over my head. “You may think being nice is my way of being fluff, but it’s my protection. If I really thought hard about this shit, my head would explode, so I look for things that keep me smiling and cling to them. Dressing pretty is my drug of choice.”
I shudder, and Luna must have felt it.
“Sorry,” she says, touching my shoulder. “I’m not making light of what you went through.”
“It’s not that.” I place my hand on hers. “Silas may have seen my arms, and I’m hoping it won’t end up in print.”
Luna bends forward and hugs me. “Come on. Let’s do your makeup before we ruin it with our tears.”
Class starts in fifteen minutes, and I’m going to have run in heels across campus. But I’m okay with that when I look in the mirror and see the magic Luna has performed.
“Bitch,” I smile, “I look rich.”
We laugh, and I grab my bag then hustle out of the apartment. I have to take off my shoes to run to class. And already, I’m getting looks. Class starts as I walk in. Mr. Carroll will chew you out for tardiness even if you’re a minute late, but he says nothing to me as people literally turn around in their chairs to look. Tough-girl Vicki has been replaced with rich-girl Vicki. I smirk, knowing that I would’ve fit in easily with the Montlake snobs. My mother would cry tears of joy to see me dressed this way.
I play it up and smile at Mr. Carroll as I take a seat in the front row. He clears his throat as I sit down. I don’t even bother putting on my Choo’s. I toss them onto the seat next to me and cross my legs. I glance over at a glaring Rosemonde. Silas’s hand is on her shoulder, massaging it as he stares at me. Damn, Luna is right; the bee is swarming to the honey. He doesn’t know what to make of it. I give him a half smile and turn my full attention to Mr. Carroll.
When class is over, I don’t jump out of my seat and run like I usually do. I’m into acting the part of the rich girl. The girl they accuse me of being, though I’ve fought against it all my life. I point my painted toes as my platinum bob carelessly falls into my face. In slow motion, I pull on my Choo’s, knowing I’m being watched.
Someone clears their throat, and I look up into Silas’s steady gaze. He stands in front of me, waiting for my attention. I glance past him at Rosemonde, who scowls then hurries away up the aisle.
“Your girlfriend is leaving without you,” I say to him.
He scoffs. “She’s not my girlfriend.”
“She’s not Rhys’s either. Is she?”
Silas narrows his gaze. “So, you have a plan?”
I frown. “Why do you ask?”
“Because you look like you’re planning something.”
“Do either of you need to speak to me?” Carroll asks in his quivering voice.
Silas waves his hand as if the man is a gnat. “You can leave.”
Carroll doesn’t look thrilled with being talked down to by a person who can’t buy liquor legally. “Shut the doors when you go.” He grabs his messenger bag and walks out.
“Well, now we’ve both pissed him off,” I say calmly.
“He’s not in the game,” replies Silas. “He’s strictly academic.”
“So, you leave him alone?” I ask.
Silas nods.
“But the rest are fair game?” I pull the newspaper out of my bag and throw it in his lap, folded to that hateful page.
Silas glances at it then tosses it onto the floor.
I look at the crumpled pages lying in a heap and see Theo lying on the living room floor again. “I ran for SC president on an anti-bullying platform,” I point. “As our school president, what are your plans?”
“I don’t believe in censorship,” Silas says coolly, “and these people are eager to be helped.”
My cool slips. “You’re full of it.”
“You don’t have to be an outsider, Victoria.”
“You mean I could use my privilege to bully weaker people. Not interested in that bullshit, Silas.”
“Neither am I,” he replies. “Why do you think I waste so much time on you? You have something that could be useful, but you refuse to use it. Mel Vaughn wants to make a deal with your father. Who’s the snob there?”
My face heats. “My dad is not a bad person.”
“But we are?” he asks.
“If you’re not, Silas, why do you act like one?”
He doesn’t answer me. Instead, he stands. “I guess you haven’t really changed.” Silas’s snotty look dismisses me. “Let me know when you’re ready to get serious.”
I don’t watch him. I listen to his footsteps go up the aisle and then the door slams shut.
Asshole.
***
After class, I find Theo alone in his dorm room with the curtains drawn. The bed is unmade, and a tangle of sheets rests on the foot of the bed. This is not the same person I met last month. Love has fucked him up.
“Theo, are you coming to lunch?”
I pause when I spot the paper open to the misery column on his desk. Theo’s expression closes me off from him. I had never been in love, not in the way I think he might be. Back then, I was so high I can barely remember my first time. It was nothing special. Nothing I want to remember, even if I could.
I place my hand on his shoulder, and he sighs deeply.
“Hey, honey,” I ask, “why don’t you come over for lunch?’
“No.” He pulls away from me. “I’m not going to your place. Sorry.”
“Want to drive down to the Bait Shop?”
He shakes his head. “People know this is me.”
I suck in air and lie poorly. “How can they? You’re not the only gay guy on campus.”
“But I’m the one Silas hates the most,” he replies. “All these letters are written about people he hates. And he has always hated me.”
“Why?”
Theo sits down on the quilted couch, and I sit beside him. “Because I teased him one day in freshman English. I didn’t know who he was, and I didn’t know he was a child star. I mean, that wasn’t a show I was going to watch. I made a comment, and the teacher asked Silas what he thought about my comparison of child stars and trained lapdogs. I fucked up. I’ve been trying to play it off. But that boy will carry that grudge to his grave.”
I don’t like being in Theo’s room. The heaviness makes me want to go out into the sunlight. It feels like his depression is taking form into something that is always there to keep him company. I have to get him away from his thoughts before they consume him.
“Come on, Theo. Let’s go to the Bait Shop. I’ll get Luna, and you can make fun of my hair.”
He smiles. “I got stuff to do.”
“Okay, but we’ll do something tonight.”
His eyes are so sad when he speaks to me. “Sure, we’ll do something later.”
I know that we won’t.
***
I walk back to the town house, turning what Silas said over and over, trying to see another angle to this thing. Do I want to be in the industry, or do I just want to win? If I win, then my friends also win. And I want to win for a change. Not be used. Butting heads may not do it. Maybe I need to play dirtier.
I shake the thought out of my head.
Scheming my dreams, I don’t notice Chase until I almost walk into him. He holds up his hands to catch me. And my body tenses, but that only makes him smile.
“Silas was right,” he smiles. “You do look hot today.” His gaze travels over my body and stops on my face. I wish I had my long-sleeved shirt on. But it would ruin the bitchy attitude. And that’s what I’m playing at…to look like them, so they know I’m just as important when I choose to be.
I pull myself out of his grip. “I saw your girlfriend the other day,” I purr, and tilt my head. “I don’t think she likes me anymore.”
“You don’t know anything about that.” Chase frowns. We haven’t spoken about his secret fuck since that night.
I bat my lashes. “Is she going to tank my grade because of you? Should I write to Dear Misery for advice?”
“Vicki.” His hard voice cautions me.
“I didn’t blow your secret,” I widen my eyes. “Oops, pun intended. Your president mentioned it in the paper.” A chill cracks my voice when Chase’s eyes narrow. “But I’m sure he wasn’t talking about you. You’re so tight with him.”
Chase leaves me staring after him as he takes the stairs two at a time to Silas’s suite. I can’t help myself. I smirk like the troublemaker I am today. Troy found out dirt on each of them, but how will it serve me if I’m the only one who knows it?
In the living room, Luna is in sweats and watching a reality show on her laptop. She glances over at me as I walk in and then twists her lips into a scowl.
“What? Is the wig crooked?”
“Not a chance,” she replies. “I pinned that to stay put. You could hold your head out the car window speeding over a hundred and it won’t blow off. I’m frowning because you have an evil grin on your face. Did you run into Silas?”
I nod. “But it’s Chase who put a grin on my face. And Theo’s not doing well.”
“He won’t come here.” Luna glances at her texts. “And I hate going there.” She hugs her shoulders. “His room doesn’t feel right.”
I join her on the couch. “I noticed that too.”
“It’s creepy. I feel like I’m being watched.”
I nod. “Yeah, it doesn’t feel right. But I don’t want to leave him on his own. Let’s grab him and drive over to my dad’s.”
Luna’s face lights up as soon as I mention my dad. “Let me change into something else.”
“Why do you and Dom have a crush on my dad?”
“Vicki,” she replies, “it’s unusual to meet a person your dad’s age that’s genuinely happy and not bitter with the world. Imagine Silas at forty. Do you want to hang in a house with him? And bonus, your house is amazing.”
“You’re right.” I smile. “I did luck out with the dad pick.”
Luna and I practically have to pry Theo out of his room. He wears a hoodie that covers his face and flip-flops on his feet. This isn’t the kid I met. Talia is heading toward us down the path from the student center, and I’m thinking we may need a backup.
“Hey, Talia. Where are you going?”
“Dining hall,” she grimaces.
I shake my head. “Nope,
you’re coming with us to hang at my dad’s house.”
She nods. “Thank you for the intervention.” Talia frowns at Theo. “Man, I need to talk to you.”
Luna frowns at Talia. “Do you know each other?”
Talia shakes her head as she loops her arm in Theo’s. “Nope, but we’ve both been hurtled down the same bumpy road.” She grins at Theo, who finally looks away from the ground. “Even an LGBT can use a gay best friend.”