by B. P. Kasik
Muscles, muscles everywhere…
But the trainer looked back and made eye contact with Jerry. Was that a wink? That couldn’t be a wink.
After a few minutes of general confusion, sadness, and rubbernecking bloodlust, the bodies were finally taken away in ambulances and the crowds began to disburse.
The thickly muscled men walked in like an entourage around the personal trainer as they re-entered the Gym.
Ben and Jerry stood on the sidewalk as the crowd thinned.
Ben said, “Kinda makes you think, huh?”
“Think about what?”
“How life is precious.”
Jerry laughed.
Ben huffed. “Yeah, I know that’s cheesy, but c’mon! Something really horrible happened here. This should unite us. I mean, we’re still here.”
“I guess.”
“We should have you over for dinner.”
“Sure, that’d be great.”
“No—serious! I don’t just mean that in an ‘I feel obligated to offer an insincere invitation that neither of us will ever follow-up on.’ Let’s set a night. How about Friday?”
“Sure. Will your wife be okay with it?”
“She’s a great host.”
“Okay, sounds good. I got nothing else to do.”
Chapter 14
Jerry sat and waited at the crowded DMV, along with everyone else. He fiddled with his phone, read some news stories, checked Facebook for the latest Jerry Springer-esque verbal brawls between his relatives.
He kept his left leg elevated on the seat in front of him.
He waited patiently, draining about 30% of his phone’s battery. And then, finally, his name was called. He walked up to the counter and handed over the disability permit renewal form to an employee with a vaguely familiar face.
He didn’t notice until getting there that the employee was extremely bulky. His biceps bulged out of his short-sleeved collared shirt.
Never seen a buff DMV employee before. Thought desk workers would be more sedentary…
The desk worker processed his paperwork, typing the hand-written portions into his computer without saying a word.
Jerry wanted to fiddle with his phone again, even reached in his pocket for it, but then noticed a sign saying, “No Cell Phone Use at Counter.”
Cancel that.
So he stood in silence.
He finally asked, “Why are cell phones forbidden at the counter?”
The desk worker continued to type and didn’t look away from the computer as he responded, “DMV doesn’t want its employees ending up on YouTube.”
“I just want to mess around online, not use a camera.”
“Cell phone can be a camera without our awareness. You could also record audio with it. Both forbidden.”
Jerry laughed. “Well, I could have started recording audio on my phone before walking up here and it could be recording us as we speak!”
The desk worker finally stopped typing and stared at him. “Buddy, I don’t care if you use your phone. But I have to go by the rules here. Don’t blame me for the rules.”
“Okay, fair enough.”
The DMV worker kept typing.
Then Jerry asked, “So you work out a lot?”
“I do.”
“You ever go to the Gym?”
“Yes.” The worker finally showed something resembling warmth. “I started going there the day they opened. Are you a member?”
“I am! Isn’t that place the best?”
“It is.”
“Where did you work out before? How does it compare to other gyms?”
“Oh, I never worked out before the Gym.”
“What?” Jerry stared at the worker’s perfectly-sculpted muscles. “Never?”
“Nope. That place works wonders.”
“Yeah, it sure does…”
And the worker nodded, smiled, and continued typing.
That was when Jerry thought for a moment and finally remembered how he knew this guy’s face.
This was the scrawny guy Ben and he had seen the other day. The guy who struggled to bench-press 90 pounds with the personal trainer.
It couldn’t be.
But the more Jerry looked at him, the more sure he became. This was absolutely the same guy.
The worker finished typing. “I’ll print this up and get you your new permit. Will 90 days be sufficient?”
“Yes...sufficient.”
Jerry’s mind was frozen in confusion, as the employee walked away and came back after a minute.
“Here’s your permit and paperwork, sir. Please keep the paperwork in your car whenever you use the permit. Police have the legal right to ask for proof to insure you’re the proper owner of that permit.”
“Right, to make sure I’m not some friend or relative abusing the handicapped parking privilege.”
“Exactly. And to make sure it’s not stolen. It’s for your protection, even if it’s a bit of a nuisance.”
“Thanks,” Jerry said. “Say—do you work out with the Gym’s personal trainer?”
“I do! He’s a bit aggressive and it took some time for me to adjust to his methods, but I appreciate him now.”
“It’s all for your health, right?”
“Haha, exactly! Have a good day, sir. Hope to see you at the Gym!”
“Definitely! Also, can I ask what prompted you to start working out? Since you never worked out before?”
“Sure! The Gym offers a 30-day free trial to anyone, but they contacted us in advance and told us they offer a 90-day free trial for any government employees.”
Jerry processed that. “Pretty good deal!”
“It really is. I love that place.”
“Me, too. Me, too.”
Jerry took a brief look to the left and right and took in the female desk workers. Despite their conservative dress, he could tell they had perfect bodies. “Do the rest of the DMV workers here go to the Gym?”
“As a matter of fact, they do! Every last one of them!”
Jerry nodded and tried to smile. “Okay, thanks. Bye now.”
Jerry felt his body’s stress settle in his ankle and limped harder than usual out of the DMV.
He got in his car and tried to figure out why this all seemed very wrong. There was no way that scrawny guy could have bulked up so drastically in such a short time.
It was like there was a short-circuit in his brain. Every time he focused too close on the Gym, his brain re-routed and reminded him how awesome the place was.
And it was. It really was awesome.
Chapter 15
Uneasy dreams plagued Jerry but he got up, repressed them, and rushed through his morning stretches in anticipation of visiting the Gym. He barely noticed his breakfast or coffee, they were just interruptions.
He strolled across the street, barely limping, not giving a second thought to the two dead people he’d seen on this street the previous day.
It bothered him that it didn’t bother him but that passed fast.
He came inside and held up his Gym ID to scan. He looked up and saw that his ex-wife was working the counter again.
“Hey!” he said.
She forced a polite smile. “Hello. Welcome to the Gym.”
“Um. Thanks. Are you required to say that?”
She looked at him. “I’m at work right now. I can have personal conversations off the clock.”
“Oh.”
He started to walk away, then noticed a new sign in the middle of the lobby, “FREE LIPO SESSIONS!”
He turned back to his ex and said, “Can you talk about Gym business on the clock?”
“Of course! I’ll be glad to answer any questions.”
“Okay—what’s a ‘Lipo Session’?”
She kept her face tight. “The Gym wants to optimize the health of its patrons and this means going the extra step in helping to construct the optimum physical appearance.”
Jerry nodded. “What?”
“It’s liposuction.”
“Liposuction!?”
“Harmless. A barely-invasive operation.”
“You’re offering plastic surgery?”
“Only for select clients who exercise a certain number of times per week, proving their dedication to bettering themselves.”
“You’re sucking the fat out of their body with a machine?”
“Yes, that is one way to describe the process.”
“Beck, c’mon. It’s me. Why the stiff formality?”
“As I said, I’m happy to discuss work matters off the clock. But I am currently on the clock. If you have any other questions about achieving optimum weight in conjunction with a healthy workout routine, I’ll be happy to answer them.”
Jerry felt a tug-of-war taking place in his head. Something about this seemed even more wrong than usual, but he was struggling to articulate any objection. Everything seemed normal, no matter how many alarms he heard in his subconscious.
“This is just...You sound like a rehearsed recording.”
She shrugged. “We seek to provide a reliable uniformity of communication and presentation to make our customers happy. It’s all for—”
“My health. Yeah, I know. Okay, when are you off?”
“6.”
“I’ll be here at 5:59.”
“Very well. Enjoy your workout, sir.”
“I damn well will!”
Jerry felt better after a workout and a shower.
He sat in the lobby, waiting for his ex to get off work. A steady flow of people entered and exited the “Lipo Services” room.
Wouldn’t the Gym need a medical license or something to perform surgery? Weren’t there hygiene requirements or regulations or something like that?
But surely, the Gym wouldn’t perform surgery without clearing all the legal hurdles first.
He continued to alternate people-watching with phone-fiddling, occasionally reaching down to massage his sore ankle. Everything aggravated it, even sitting too long.
His ex finally came out of the employee area behind the front desk and nodded at him, then pointed at the front door. She walked out and he followed.
The sun was shining only slightly brighter than the Gym sign out front. People were arriving home from work, driving out for dinner, and parking on the street so they could work out.
Jerry caught up to his wife, briskly walking away down the street.
“Hey, wait up!”
She looked back and slowed, allowing his limping stride to match hers.
“What’s the rush?”
“No rush,” she said. “Just trying to walk-and-talk so I can get to the bus hub.”
“You’re taking the BUS home?”
“Yeah, the car has the kid seats in it and my parents need access to it.”
“Oh. Right. How are the kids?”
“They’re fine. They enjoyed their time with you the other day. They’d like to see you more.”
“I know, I know, it’s just—”
“I know. I tell them daddy was hurt and they’ll just have to wait for him to be able to play with them more often.”
“Right, thanks. How are your parents handling childcare duties?”
“Mom doesn’t work and dad’s only part-time so they have room in their lives.”
“Great, great.” They crossed the street and turned a corner and he waited until the Gym was out of sight before he continued. “Now, the elephant in the room—why are you being so weird?”
“Weird?”
“Yeah, you treated me like a stranger in there. Cold as ice. You talked like a robot.”
Becky started to talk, then stopped. Then tried again. She looked back, also confirming the Gym was out of sight. “It’s a very demanding job. They have strict requirements about on-the-job conduct.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be friendly at the front desk?”
“Yes, we are. We’re supposed to be friendly and businesslike and strictly adherent to the rules but flexible as needed and helpful but not too helpful.”
“Sounds fun.”
“It’s really not. We’re all pretty stressed out.”
“But it’s such a great place!”
“So you say.”
Jerry paused. “You don’t like the place?”
Becky collected her thoughts for a while. “I did at first. It was dazzling. It offers amazing services and gets amazing results. But there’s so much wrong there. It just doesn’t seem like it needs to be so...intense.”
“Gyms are supposed to be intense, aren’t they? Like, to motivate?”
“Yes, of course. And for a while I was able to rationalize all the things I see there. And I’ve seen some weird things…”
“Like what?”
“Nothing, nothing. Don’t worry about it. If you’re happy there, that’s fine. Please be happy. I’m just...having trouble dealing with it. I can’t explain. It’s okay most of the time. But then the fog clears and I’m not even sure what’s real or what’s just in my head.”
Jerry nodded. He had no idea what to say. But he tried to relate. “Every now and then, I think the Gym is kind of strange. But then I think about how much good it’s doing for people. How much good it’s done for me. That seems to help.”
“You’re right. You’re right. It does a lot of good. We’re helping people. I just get scared sometimes.”
Jerry decided it was time for a subject change. “So, watching any cool shows?”
Becky laughed. “I watched the rest of Leverage. Did you?”
Jerry shook his head and also laughed. Leverage was their last “couple” show. They were halfway through the third season when they ended things. And then Becky got her own Netflix account and they never watched anything together again. Leverage was still in his queue. But Jerry could never quite bring himself to watch any more. It felt like it would just sadden him and remind him that there was no one sitting on the couch next to him.
“Seemed like it was getting kind of silly. The capers were getting more and more unbelievable.”
Becky smiled. “Yeah. It was getting pretty out there. It’s probably the reason we broke up.”
“Yeah. Stupid Leverage.”
“It ended well, though.”
“That’s good.”
“Yeah. It’s nice when there’s a good ending.”
Jerry nodded. “Yeah. Speaking of which, I’ve walked about as far as I can manage here. I’ll let you go.”
Becky stopped. “The way you work out at the Gym, seems like you’d be able to walk much further than this.”
“You watch me work out?”
“No, just saw you in passing.”
“Well. You’re right. But it’s a controlled environment. Out here it’s scarier because I worry my leg will give out on me and I’ll have to crawl home or hop on one leg.”
“Fair. Okay. Bye, Jerry.”
“Bye, Becky.”
And she walked away.
It had been good to talk with her, but Jerry was still concerned that she wasn’t happy with her work.
Especially at a place as great as the Gym.
Chapter 16
In her own world, Kwan biked and biked and biked.
The moment the Gym opened at 5 am, she ran in and up the glass stairs and got on the first bike in the front row. And she pedaled away.
People came and went on the other bikes and nearby equipment.
None of them realized Kwan was working out before and after them.
She dripped sweat through every pore as the hours passed. She soaked through her clothes and then moisture poured all over the seat and settled in a growing puddle all around the bike.
She focused on the last thing the personal trainer told her in their last session.
“Stay intense. Keep going. Never stop.”
Kwan woke up that morning with those words echoing through her mind.
NEVER STOP.
It felt like they were hammering away at the i
nside of her skull.
She got out of bed and began to dress and the pain stopped as she got ready for her workout.
She walked over to her son’s room to let him know she was going to the Gym but as she stopped at the door, the pain hit her harder than ever. She couldn’t lift her hand up to the doorknob. So she turned away and started walking downstairs and the pain stopped again.
When she got to the kitchen, she reached into the cabinet to get some oatmeal and then dropped the container, spilling it everywhere as the hammer sensation in her skull turned into a jackhammer.
She held in a scream as she collapsed. The pain kept hitting her and hitting her.
When she finally adjusted to the agonizing sensation and realized it wasn’t going to stop, she pulled herself to her feet and walked the door. And the pain stopped.
Kwan didn’t hesitate at that point. She knew anything she did that delayed her journey to the Gym would result in agony, so she just got in the car and went without a second’s delay.
And as long as she kept biking, the pain remained at bay.
Just as a test, Kwan slowed her pace after an hour. She took the bike’s resistance rating down from 8 to 4. A warning shot was fired in her mind as her skull felt like it was shrinking around her brain. Just a mild pain, but enough to get her to raise the power level back up to 8. And then she felt fine.
And biked and biked and biked.
She told herself that people did this all the time. Biked for hours. This was excellent exercise.
It was all for her health.
She was getting healthier by the moment.
But after five hours, she started to lose consciousness. She kept pumping her legs, but she was nodding off. Her pace slowed as her legs moved slower and slower…
And then she felt an electric jolt slam into her mind and heart.
She was completely alert, feeling like the one time she drank five Red Bulls on a dare back in college.
Her legs shot back into motion. And she stayed awake, the fear keeping her from drifting off.
After seven hours, she realized this force in her head might never let her quit.
And she entered a fugue state. She’d heard of a “runner’s high,” but never a “biker’s trance.”