by Marlie May
But the way she’d acted with Cara—still acted with Cara when they met up around the visits with Arie—lifted my ire. I hated seeing my wife upset, especially when there wasn’t anything I could do about it.
At the plant, I was greeted by the sharp aroma of mango and green tomato salsa, which wasn’t unusual. We’d planned to process a batch today, and Kevin was overseeing its bottling via his newly-designed system.
Since it was almost lunchtime, visitors crowded the tasting room. Servers with bowls of chips and sauce samples, plus frosty glasses of beer, sailed past me, on their way to excited customers. The cash registers clicked as people purchased products on one end of the room, and a group of eager tourists stood near the entrance to the main room, awaiting a tour.
After badging through a door along the side of the room, I took the back hall to my office. Inside, I settled in my chair and dealt with supply issues. A freak snowstorm south of us had delayed our fancy bottle caps—the ones with 3D jalapeños—from arriving on time. Other than grumble, there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. I called the delivery company, and they assured me the caps would arrive next week. The delay was in Cleveland. They were terribly sorry.
After hanging up, I rubbed the back of my neck. I was the one who was sorry. Peeved, actually, because this would set back production for a week.
Turning on my computer, I went through the accounts, making sure everything was ready for payroll and that I hadn’t missed any payments. I had, unfortunately, but a quick phone call reassured the supplier that the money would be transferred by the end of the day.
A second phone call to the bank made sure it would happen.
I left my office and strode out to the main bottling room, where a horrific scene awaited me. Tension shot through the top of my head as I gaped at the room. “What the?” I shouted. “What’s going on here?”
“Whoa, baby.” Sam came in through the door behind me. “Looks like a tomato massacre in progress.” She snickered.
It was not funny. Sauce oozed from a gap in one of the newly retrofitted pipes, plopping onto the floor. What looked like a bloody pond surrounded the equipment. The new fitting must’ve ignited like tomato dynamite when it let go because red chunks speckled the ceiling, walls, and tiles surrounding the pond.
I ground my teeth. This was not the day for something like this to happen.
“Kevin?” I called out, unable to keep irritation from lifting my voice.
A few workers doing hasty clean-up with mops, rags, and buckets slunk behind the largest tank.
Kevin strode over, his shirt and jeans red-spattered. “Hell, I’m sorry. A pipe in the new system let loose.”
No kidding. “I thought you double checked everything.”
“Did.”
While ranting would do no good, it was all I could do to hold myself back. With deliberation, I kept my tone neutral, but it sure wasn’t easy. “How much did we lose?”
“Not much.” He pulled a hunk of tomato out of his dark hair and glanced toward the pond. “Looks worse than it really is. I’d say, maybe ten percent of the batch?”
Which equaled one-third of my profit. Down the drain. Great.
Kevin must’ve seen the thunder clouds gathering on my face because he gulped. “It won’t happen again. I’ll make sure the lines hold when we put through the next run.”
Grimacing, I slapped his back, projecting a solid front for the staff. “It’s okay. As long as controls are in place from now on.”
Inside, I felt like I’d swallowed a razor blade. This was what happened when I loosened the reins. And when I trusted others to do things I should do myself. When would I ever learn? Shaking my head, I grabbed a bundle of rags and started toward the clean-up crew. “Not you,” I said to Kevin. I probably said too loudly, since Pete, one of the guys manning a mop, paused and looked my way. I lowered my voice. “You need to fix that line before it dumps any more of my profits. Leave this to us.”
A frown gathering on her face, Sam glanced from me to Kevin. After wiping her hands on her jeans, she snatched at my arm and pulled me away from the others. “What’s up with you? Sure, you lost some sauce, but it’s not that big a deal. Not enough to lose your cool over.”
I explained about the missing caps. The payment mess-up. And what happened between Cara and her mother-in-law, which got me wound up all over again.
“Ah, okay,” Sam said. “I get that you’re peeved. But everyone’s working to fix this as fast as possible. Give us a chance.” She dragged me toward the door. “Why don’t you go to your office? Get out of our hair. Do, I don’t know, some bookkeeping.” Her grimace bought one out in me, and she laughed. “You do love it, don’t you?”
My lips twisted. “I did it already.”
“Then go home. Find Cara.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “You’re still on your honeymoon.”
“Cara’s working on her building.” And while I was periodically tempted to lure her away, I understood the need to finish a project.
“Then go help her. I’ll stay here and supervise the clean-up. Everything will be sparkling when you come in tomorrow. Not only that, I’ll make sure the equipment is running smoother than a baby’s bottom.” She laughed.
“I could.” I wanted to be with Cara. Make sure she wasn’t still upset. Even though I’d seen her not long ago, we’d been married less than two weeks. I missed her.
Maybe, during the summer, we could take an escape weekend together. It seemed like one thing had piled onto another ever since we got home. We connected in the evenings, but most of that time was for Arie.
The looming court case sure didn’t help.
“Okay,” I said.
“Good man.” She nudged my shoulder. “Remember, big sisters are always right.”
I grimaced.
Driving back into town, I found Cara’s building locked up tight. Again.
I had a key, but the lights were off inside, so she must’ve left. Would I find her at home? I could surprise her, show her how much I loved her. Then we could go for a walk and out to dinner once Arie got home from school.
“Honey, I’m home!” I called out when I opened the front door. No reply, but her car was in the drive, so she had to be here somewhere. Leaving the entry, I strode through the dining room and into the kitchen. Still no Cara. “Honey?”
A piece of paper lay on the floor, and I picked it up. Cara must’ve gotten the mail already.
I glanced down as I laid it on the granite island, but when I caught a few words, my hands stilled. Shook, actually.
My initial surprise was followed by hurt. Then anger that grew bigger than a giant inside me.
Down the hall to my right, Cara opened the bathroom door and left the room. She walked slowly in my direction like she was ill.
Or like she felt guilty?
I was no microbiologist, but it was clear what I was reading on this paper. The paternity test results listed Cara and Arie in the first two columns, then Jason—alleged father, in the third. The key on the bottom made it a snap to interpret the DNA results.
Jason was not Arie’s father.
As Cara approached, I tucked the paper down by my side, out of sight. Not sure why I didn’t lift it up, dangle it close to her face.
“You’re home early.” Rubbing her eyes, she slumped against the counter. She cupped her chin in her palms and sighed. When she wiped her mouth, and a minty scent filled the air, it was clear she’d just brushed her teeth. Her mussed hair and pink cheeks suggested she was having a worse day than me. If that was possible.
Concern for her battled with the crushing sensation behind my ribs. “You okay? You don’t look good.”
“Just threw up.”
A virus? Or was this related to nerves? I wished I trusted this situation enough to ask her.
Heat flushed through my body, and a ball of rage barreled up from inside me, scorching my tongue. I was surprised by the flash, but I could not hold it back any longer.
&nbs
p; “What’s this?” I lowered the paper onto the counter. Stupid to ask. She well knew what it was. She’d had it in her possession for over five years but must’ve pulled it out today. For what purpose?
Her eyes darted sideways.
Guilty. As I’d assumed. The tightness in my chest was only rivaled by the clamping sensation in my throat. Had she known all this time and kept it from me? She couldn’t have. She wouldn’t have lied.
Like Lainie didn’t lie when she stole from you?
Cara watched me, watched this play out on my face.
“Did you…?” I shook my head, but I couldn’t back away from my hurt. It coursed through my veins like acid, feeding my fury. “If Jason isn’t Arie’s father…” How could this be true?
Straightening, she linked her arms around her waist, holding tight. “I think you’re Arie’s father, Roan.”
“You think.” I couldn’t contain the bitterness filling my mouth. “You’re not sure?”
Her voice cracked. “You know I didn’t sleep with anyone but you and Jason.”
Jason, who’d stolen Cara from me. Who’d denied us time together for six fuckin’ years.
She blinked and horror rapidly filled her face. Her breath eased out like a damaged balloon. As if releasing the air pained her. “Wait. Are you suggesting I slept with so many men, I don’t know who fathered my child?”
My no came out too slow. But a woman would know something like this, wouldn’t she? She and Jason broke up before we got together, and I’d used a condom. Yet, here I was, staring at the certainty that I was Arie’s father. She was my daughter. Never Jason’s.
“Ah, I see.” Her body shook, and for a moment, I thought she’d fall. Her shoulders curled forward, and tears slid from her eyes. “You think I kept your child from you all these years.”
I lifted the paper again, hating that I couldn’t stop myself from raging, from hurting her, but I was in pain, too. “This says Jason’s not Arie’s father. I have a daughter and she was stolen from me.”
“I didn’t do it. I didn’t know.” Her defense came out weaker than her voice.
Of course, she’d known. All these years, she’d had the results, and she’d kept them from me. Kept my daughter from me. Why had she done it? Had she hated me that much back then? Jesus, this was a mess.
“I thought Arie was Jason’s.” Her head jerked back, and a fury matching mine blazed in her eyes. “I married that asshole. Based on a lie.”
“Yeah, he lied to me, too.” I’d had enough of this. Rehashing Jason wasn’t going to negate the fact that she’d kept this from me. “But instead of just Jason’s original lie, I was fed a pack of them.”
“I can’t believe it.” The long, anguished look she sent sliced through me. “You don’t believe me. You think…How could you stand here in the house we made a home and suggest all of this”— her arm spread wide—“is all a big lie? We grew up together. Best friends. Now, it seems like you don’t know me at all?”
“I…” My retort slid back down my throat, and my face heated. Why should I feel defensive? I was not the one to blame here. She was because she’d lied. Everyone always lied to me. “Lainie…”
She flinched. “Don’t even think of comparing me to your ex. We’re nothing alike.”
“Aren’t you?” A low blow, but I couldn’t stop myself. I was heading over the cliff, with no parachute in sight.
“You have no right to be angry with me.” Her shrill voice made me jerk back. “I did nothing.” Cupping her face in her palms, she sagged against the wall. “I gave you everything. I trusted you.”
Trust?
Well, anguish gutted me. All I could think about was what I’d missed. Watching my daughter’s birth. Holding her when she cried. Being there for her when she was sick.
Hearing her call me Daddy.
The realization made my head spin. Unable to think, and unwilling to keep rehashing this, I dropped the test results on the counter and strode down the hall to our bedroom. After pulling my suitcase from the closet—I’d barely unpacked after returning from Costa Rica—I grabbed a few jeans and shirts and stuffed them inside. Underwear, socks. Closed and zipped up the case.
Cara braced her shoulder against the doorway. “Where are you going?” she asked quietly.
“Sam’s.”
“You’re leaving me.” Hurt leaked through in her words, but I couldn’t see past my own. My daughter. I’d lost years with my little girl. “Please, let me explain.”
My hand stilled on my suitcase handle. Then I tugged it off the bed, letting it smack onto the floor. “What’s to explain? You knew Arie was mine and you kept her from me.”
Her gaze turned to flint. “I’m not defending myself to you any longer. If this is your form of love, well…it might be best that you do leave.”
Knowing I’d been right about this didn’t make the stabbing in my chest go away, but it did make it easier for me to stride out of the room, down the hall, and out the front door. If I stayed here much longer, I’d start telling myself I could forgive her lies.
If nothing else, the distance I’d sensed in Cara since we returned from Costa Rica made sense now.
She’d been planning to tell me.
Cara
After Roan left me, I curled into a ball on our bed, clung to his pillow, and sobbed.
He hadn’t let me explain. He’d been too willing to believe I’d lie, that I’d act no better than his ex-wife. How could he believe I’d hide that he was Arie’s father for six years?
What did that say about us, about our marriage? About his love?
With so much going on in my life, I couldn’t wallow in my misery for long, so I made myself get up. I splashed cold water on my face in the bathroom, brushed my hair, and dragged myself out to the kitchen to fix Arie a snack. She’d be home from school soon, and I needed to show her a stable parent. The nightmares she’d had after Jason died had faded, but if she sensed something was wrong, she could fall back into them again.
Not that I could hide the fact that Roan had left me. That fact would be blatantly apparent.
I sniffed and struggled not to start crying all over again.
Arie got off the bus and ran up the drive, clutching a picture she’d colored for me in one hand and her backpack in the other. She started chattering the second she passed through the door. “I’m home,” she shouted, and I stooped down and hugged her until she struggled to get free. “I made this for you and Roan.” With a grin, she attached her picture to the fridge with an alphabet magnet.
I stared at it for a long while, not truly seeing it. Struggling to keep control and project normalcy, while everything inside me spun in circles.
“How about hanging out with Gramps for a little while?” I asked as she ate her last carrot stick dipped in ranch dressing. “I’m going to drop you off there for a while so I can go see Roan’s mom.” I needed legal advice, and she was my best option. Earlier, I’d called and begged for an urgent appointment. Dad said he’d be thrilled to help Arie with her homework. Wait until he got a look at the new math. It might change his mind.
I’d explain to Dad about the test results later.
After dropping Arie off, I drove to the law office and walked inside.
Camila rose and came out from behind her desk to hug me. “So great to see you. Roan tells me, well, that things have changed for you two, which is wonderful.” Her grin told me even more than her words how happy she was for me and Roan. Too bad her well-wishes were too late. “I imagine Sam’s pleased her matchmaking worked. To be honest, she filled me in on the location in Baldi. It sounds fabulous. I think I’ll try the resort myself next winter. I need a getaway.”
Keeping my face still, I said woodenly, “Baldi is lovely.”
She hugged me again. “I knew you and my son were perfect for each other from the time you were seventeen.”
Unable to hold it back, I started to bawl.
“Cara. Honey.” She pulled me over to a chair and p
atted the seat. “Sit, sit. It’s okay. Please, tell me what’s wrong.”
“It’s Roan and Jason and the results and…he hates me.” I sobbed some more while she rubbed my back. Handed me a tissue.
“I see.” She shook her head. “Actually, I don’t. Who hates you? And what does this have to do with Roan and Jason and results? Results of what?”
“I’m sorry.” Sniffing, I wiped my face. “I told myself I’d hold it together when I got here, but I just can’t. I’m a wreck lately.” Because I couldn’t stop worrying, I wasn’t sleeping. Acid churned through my belly twenty-four-seven, feeding my nausea.
“Just take the time you need and then we’ll talk.” Camila’s hand continued to swirl on my back.
I yanked nine yards of tissues from the box on her desk and mopped my face again. It was time to pull myself together. I needed her advice, and for that, I had to be able to talk, explain what happened coherently. Blubbering was not an option any longer.
Camila made soothing sounds while I dried my eyes and blew my nose. When I’d settled into shuddering hiccups, she went around and sat behind the desk.
Her hands trembled where she clasped them on her blotter, and her brow creased. “Start in the beginning and tell me everything.”
I took the test results from my purse and passed them across the desk, explaining how the test results had come later than expected, how Jason had gotten the mail that day. How I’d seen them with my own eyes and that the results I’d seen had made it clear Jason was Arie’s father.
“But this says he isn’t.” Camila glanced up at me over her reading glasses. “See, I’m not quite sure what to make of this.”
“Arie is Roan’s daughter.”
Her eyes widened then flashed with tears. “What? She’s…I’m a grandmother?”
I nodded, afraid I’d start in crying again. “While we were in Costa Rica, I saw Roan’s birthmark, and he told me everyone in the family has one. Arie also has the same birthmark.”
“You told Roan right away, of course.”