Bad Vampire: A Snarky Paranormal Detective Story (A Cat McKenzie Novel Book 1)

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Bad Vampire: A Snarky Paranormal Detective Story (A Cat McKenzie Novel Book 1) Page 2

by Lauren Dawes


  As I pulled out of child’s pose, I turned my head to find Sasha smiling at me.

  “Want to go get pizza?”

  I shook my head, shoving some of my loose aqua green hair from my eyes. “Not tonight. I had a shit day, and I was hoping an endorphin rush would help…”

  Sasha huffed. “Please, girl. Looking at Mike in his tight MMA shorts helps every damn time.”

  I looked over at our instructor and found him smiling at me. I glanced away. “He’ll be starring in my fantasies tonight.”

  “Girl, same.” Sasha held out her fist for me to bump. “See you tomorrow?”

  “Yup. I’m a glutton for punishment.”

  “Hashtag Masochist.”

  I laughed and stood up, stretching my arms above my head. “Hashtag You-Know-It.”

  Sasha sauntered away, and I went to retrieve my gloves and wraps from the edge of the mat.

  “You’re getting better.”

  I yelped, turning around with a hand resting against my lurching chest. “Fuck me, Mike. I’m going to have to put a fucking bell on you. You can’t creep up on people like that.”

  More so because I was a cop and I was supposed to be aware of my environment at all times.

  “Sorry.” He grinned at me, popping a dimple I was helpless against. Every time I saw it, I went weak at the knees. “I just wanted to tell you that I can see your improvement. How long have you been coming here for?”

  “Six months?” I wiped the sweat from my brow.

  He nodded. “Six months, and you’re already giving some of my full-time guys a run for their money.”

  I snorted. Yeah, like that was true. But I smiled graciously, because that was the kind of person I was. “Thank you.”

  “You got it.” He looked over to the reception area, where the next class was waiting to start. I looked too, then frowned at what I saw.

  “Supe class?”

  “Yeah. One of my new trainers is a werewolf. He thought it might be good to start having separate classes for them, rather than mixing with the humans. They’re all incredibly strong, and at least this way, they won’t have to hold back.”

  “Do you participate in these sessions?”

  Mike shook his head. “I’m strong, but these guys are in another league. I hear that they’ll be starting an MMA cage fighting division just for supes. They can’t compete with humans.”

  “More like we can’t compete with them,” I said bitterly. “How many do you have coming?”

  “Every day? Maybe twenty. Some come every day, some only once a week.”

  “What flavor are they? Do you know?”

  “From what I can tell, mostly shifters. Some vampires come, but there’s bad blood between the two groups.”

  “Any fae?”

  Mike shrugged. “Couldn’t tell if there were. They look too human.”

  I grunted. I couldn’t agree more with that. The fae were the ones that scared me the most. With shifters, there was a look in their eye, something predatory that gave them away. Vampires had fangs—duh—but the fae were difficult. The fact that they could use glamor too only made it worse. Were they all hideous? Is that why they covered themselves in ‘human’ skins? Whatever the reason, I had no way to detect who was who.

  Sometimes, I wished those bastards would just disappear into the hole they crawled out of. The human authorities called the fae realm ‘Wonderland,’ which was cute if you liked the idea of one place where fae shed their skins and were every inch as badass as we thought they were. Wonderland wasn’t something humans could access. We weren’t even supposed to be able to see it, let alone set foot in it. And if we did? Instant death.

  Yeah, the fae were a whole bunch of fun wrapped in barbed wire. They were the gift that kept on giving.

  I waved goodbye to Mike, then stalked past the supes waiting for their class. One of them gave me the stink eye as I passed, and I returned the favor. I felt dirty even brushing past them. When I got to the front door of the gym, I stepped to the side to watch the start of the class.

  Call me a glutton for punishment if you want, but there was something to be said about assessing the enemy.

  The group began working through their warm-ups, each of them stretching out their powerful bodies in a weirdly synchronized way. Every single one of them—male and female—had muscles that bunched and flexed under their skin. They were predators in the purest form of the word.

  They were dangerous.

  With one final glare, I turned and left, wondering whether I’d just made the biggest mistake of my life by agreeing to join PIG. I guessed I’d find out tomorrow.

  Three

  I woke up the next day feeling sore and irritable. Not only did I not sleep well, the idea that I was now an official member of PIG was making me want to scratch my own eyes out. As I got ready for work, I tried not to think about everything that could go wrong today. Talk about walking into a hostile workspace. The thing was, it was different from walking into a roomful of cops who were human. All they could do was talk.

  Walking into a roomful of supes who had claws and fangs at their disposal? I had a feeling I’d find out how fast I could really run.

  I stopped at the coffee shop to grab a shot of caffeinated courage before I made me way into the office. I scratched at my over-starched shirt and cursed that I had to wear the uniform again. Maybe the supes had a more relaxed dress code? That’d be amazing if it was true. I parked my truck and walked into the café, whistling softly as I did. The girl behind the counter gave me a warm smile.

  “The usual?”

  “Thanks, Jen.” I paid for my order, then tucked a couple of bucks into the tip jar. I’d been coming to this place for about a year now, way before I’d joined the force, and while I was still in training too. Moving off to one side, I waited for my order, my eyes not focused on anything in particular.

  My gaze rose when I heard someone with a dark, smoky voice place an order. I stared at the guy, unashamedly. He was tall—not hard when I’m rocking Oompa Loompa stature—with dark hair and crystal grey eyes. He was just the kind of guy I’d go for. All he had to have now was a twelve-inch dick.

  Hey, a girl can dream.

  My gaze drifted lower, to his strong hands that looked like he knew what to do with them. Like spank me when I needed it. Yeah, just thinking about it made me squirm. There was a breathy sigh, and I glanced over at the woman waiting two back in the line from him. Her eyes were on him too, the lust filling her gaze unmistakable, because I felt it as well. It was raw and strong and…

  The necklace around my neck began to glow and pulse beneath my shirt. I glanced down at it, wrapping my hand around the stone to stop anyone else from seeing it glowing. What in the actual fuck? What was it doing?

  The room seemed to pulse, like a breath held and not released, until finally there was a near audible pop. Somehow, I found the strength to tear my eyes away. I could still feel the pressure, the sexual desire dominating the space, but I didn’t feel the need to scratch out the other woman’s eyes with the stirring sticks at my elbow.

  I looked at her again. She was stroking the base of her throat and the top of her breasts hidden beneath a lavender blouse. She was still under the influence of whatever the fuck was going down in this coffee shop. The guys didn’t seem to be having the same reaction though.

  The guy at the front of the line finally paid, then turned and looked at me right in the eyes. The necklace flared hotter again, and I flinched at the sudden surge of accompanying heat. It didn’t burn, it was just uncomfortably warm against my palm, like a heat pack left against the skin for a little too long.

  “Can I help you?” he asked smoothly.

  He smelled of dark chocolate and whisky, and I found myself involuntarily licking my lips. Shaking my head, I focused on other facts, like everything about him was perfect, from the expensive haircut to his angular jaw and straight nose. Geez, even his teeth were perfect.

  “Nope,” I replied, smiling s
mugly when he looked a little put out that I wasn’t floundering all over him like the other woman was.

  Ha! Fooled him.

  “Cat?” Jen called breathlessly, and I collected my order with a smile.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow, Jen.”

  The other woman’s eyes fixed on the guy, and she nodded absently at me.

  Okay, weird.

  I left the coffee shop, feeling like I had a target painted on my back. It wasn’t a target though—it was a set of cool gray eyes. Once I set foot outside, the heaviness in my pelvis began to ease. Clearly, I hadn’t been affected as greatly as the other woman, but the relief was so great, I could’ve cried. I could only imagine how the other woman would feel once she stepped outside.

  The guy had clearly been a supe, but what flavor? He looked human, but I didn’t get that just stalked feel off of him, so not a shifter. Not a vamp either, because you know, it was eight in the morning. A fae, maybe? If he was, and he wasn’t even trying to influence me just then, I didn’t want to know what it felt like when he was actually concentrating on it.

  I gunned my truck over to the station, bypassing my old department with a one-finger salute. Granted, where I was going now wasn’t much better, but at least I didn’t have to sit in a room full of people who hated me.

  Seriously, it was like being back in high school.

  Except now, all of these people were armed.

  Wandering down the hallway, I sipped my coffee and kept my head down as I passed random people in the hall. Eventually, I reached the door with PIG written in big block letters on the front.

  I took a moment to take a deep breath and let it out, then opened up the door.

  I fought the urge to walk right back out of there because… awkward. Everyone was staring at me. Everyone. And it wasn’t the stares of your regular, run of the mill humans. It was the stare of predators. Keeping my chin up, I met each of their eyes, glancing away just at the right time. I didn’t want to get into a fight with anyone…

  At least not on the first day.

  “Who are you?” a woman asked. She wasn’t dressed in uniform, but rather, she was wearing a leather outfit that took BDSM wear to a whole new level. I wondered if that was standard issue for PIG.

  “Officer Cat McKenzie,” I replied, leaning up against a nearby desk. But when there was a low, dangerous growl from the owner of said desk, I straightened and stepped away. “Don’t tell me that’s what I have to wear to work.”

  BDSM actually hissed at me like a snake, her slitted eyes gleaming with promise. I’d found that since the supernatural cat had been let out of the bag, a lot of them stopped playing human altogether. They didn’t even bother to hide what they were now.

  “Why are you here, Cat McKenzie?” someone else asked. I searched the room for who had spoken, finding a human looking woman with dark hair and green eyes sitting at one of the dozen desks scattered around the room.

  “Human liaison. Captain Wolfe sent me.”

  Someone snorted, then grumbled, “Like we’d need a fucking human to help us do our jobs.”

  “Be that as it may,” I announced in my strongest voice, “I’m here.” Although, who I was supposed to be working with, or in what capacity, I had no idea. “I was told to report to Detective Taylor,” I added when nobody seemed to be offering up any other information or indicating who was running this shit show.

  I tensed when I heard footsteps behind me, and I stepped to the side, watching the same guy from the coffee shop walk into the room. He had a cardboard tray filled with coffee cups in one hand, while in the other, he had a bag that smelled like it was full of pastries.

  The guy glanced around, then looked at me. “Who’s she?”

  “Human liaison,” someone answered. “Wolfe sent her.”

  “I’m Officer Cat McKenzie. Who are you?” I asked, finally finding my voice.

  “Detective Taylor. Sawyer Taylor… and your new partner.”

  I tried not to let my eyes bulge out of my head on that one. “Partner?”

  Sawyer offloaded his coffee tray and passed the paper bag to the guy who had growled when I leaned on his desk. “Partner. You know, those people who have your back and you have theirs? Oh! That’s right,” he said, slapping his palm against his thigh. I suddenly got a flash of him spanking my ass red, but shook the thought away just as quickly. “You’re the one who watched her partner get torn apart by a demon last week.”

  His statement seemed to be a signal to the rest of the room, because along with the plunge in temperature, there was a rise in hostility. Cops who lost partners because of their own negligence were never trusted.

  “Yes, the same one.” I was glad my voice stayed steady. “You have something to say about it?”

  Sawyer stepped closer, putting himself into my personal space. His face was so close that I felt the heat beading off his body, and his chocolate and whisky scent got tangled in my nose. I shouldn’t have been enjoying this, but I was. Against my chest, my necklace heated in warning.

  “Listen. I don’t need a partner. You’re only here as a fucking favor, and the minute you fuck it up, I’ll be shipping you back for Wolfe to deal with. In pieces.”

  “Well, aren’t you just rainbows and unicorn farts in the morning,” I drawled. “Look, Sawyer, is it? I don’t want to be here any more than you want me to be here, but I have no choice. I’m still a cop, and this is what I have to do to get back on the job. So you do what you’ve got to, but we have to work together.”

  He grunted, running his eyes over me. “Human liaison, huh?” he spat, then turned on his heel, stalking farther into the room. I kept my breathing steady, even though my heart was racing. Sawyer moved to one of the desks in the back, and I followed him.

  “Where do I sit?”

  He waved his hand, indicating an empty desk to the left. “There.”

  With a nod, I put my bag down, shoved it under the desk with my foot, then sat in the office chair. Swiveling it around, I asked, “What kind of supe are you anyway? Fae? Demon? Nymph?”

  He didn’t reply, but the muscle in his jaw jumped.

  When it became clear he wasn’t going to give me an answer, I did a full revolution of my chair and asked, “So, what are we doing?”

  He tapped angrily at his keyboard for a moment. Leaning over, I peered at his screen.

  “Buxton Elementary School. You have kids that go there? I thought it was a human-only school.”

  Sawyer ground his teeth but didn’t say anything more. Okay, he was the strong silent type. He continued to tap away, navigating his way to the ‘staff’ tab and scrolling through the faces of the teachers and aides. Eventually, he got to the end, then scrolled right back up again.

  “You know, it might be more productive to slow down so you can actually read their names.”

  “I don’t need to read their names,” he said bluntly. “I just need to see their faces. Names are irrelevant right now.”

  I leaned back in my chair. “You are just so pleasant, aren’t you?”

  He rounded on me. “You want to see pleasant?” he snarled, his gray eyes darkening ever so slightly. “Keep asking me asinine questions, and I’ll show you how pleasant I can be.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him, then shrugged. “Well sure, if you want me to keep going—”

  “I don’t!”

  I peered around the room to find everyone watching us. I scratched my chin absently. “You know, I’m getting a lot of mixed signals from you here.”

  Sawyer’s glare didn’t ease up. If anything, it got a whole lot frostier. Abruptly, he stood up and said, “Come on. We have a case to work on.”

  I jumped up from my chair. “Oh, a case? What is it? Diamond heist? Corporate espionage? Sex club?”

  That last one got me a raised eyebrow. What could I say? I had a healthy and curious sex life.

  “We’re going to the elementary school.”

  “I knew it.”

  Sawyer Taylor, meet sarcasm.<
br />
  He rolled his eyes. “There was a report overnight of a baby vampire terrorizing some students backstage at a Thanksgiving concert.”

  I blinked. “I don’t even know where to start with that one. There was a Thanksgiving concert last night, and I didn’t know about it?”

  Sawyer gave me another one of those sexy growls. “Let’s go.”

  I expected him to lead the way out of the station, but he exited the office and hung a left instead. Producing a key from the inside of his pants pocket, he opened up a door in the long hall and stepped inside. As soon as he flicked on the light, I gasped. I couldn’t look at just one thing, I wanted to look at everything.

  “This is amazing,” I breathed, reaching out to touch one of the sidearms nestled in its egg crate foam casing.

  “Don’t touch that!” Sawyer snarled.

  I retracted my hand quickly. “Why?”

  He snatched the weapon from where it was lying. “Because you have no idea what this weapon does.” He swept his arm wide. “What any of these weapons do.”

  I tried not to pout. Really, I did. “Let me guess, you aren’t going to tell me either, because I’m some poor rookie cop who messed up like a puppy peeing on the rug.”

  “As much as that analogy fits you, no. The reason you can’t touch any of these weapons is because they’ve been calibrated to specific species.”

  My brows rose. Wow. That was a new bit of information. I wondered whether Wolfe knew about all this tech. The room was literally stuffed with it.

  “Okaaaay, so what can I touch?” I ran my gaze down his body until it settled on his ass, which was looking fiiiiinnnne in those tight slacks of his.

  “No,” he said, but without any conviction.

  “No? No to what?”

  A small smile pulled at the side of his mouth. “No to whatever you’re thinking right now.”

  Around my neck, the necklace warmed. I popped my hip out and folded my arms across my chest. “How do you know what I was thinking about?”

  “I can smell it.”

  I straightened, then looked away. Okay, that was straight up weird. What kind of supe was this guy? Clearing my throat, I wandered farther into the room, bending down to get a closer look at the weapons I couldn’t touch. The technological evolution was maddeningly unfair. There were guns here that looked like they’d been props in the Men in Black movies. Hello, alien technology…or maybe just supe technology. Either way, it was badass.

 

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