by Bonnar King
Even his soft words turned me on, and I found myself cursing in between the groans. I went at him even harder, using my fingers to search for his cock again and stroke it while fucking him. The reaction was immediate, and I felt his body tense right before he exploded all over again, and it was sweet and so beautiful.
Abandoning all control now, I went at it, pounding inside him without remorse and feeling my vision tunnel. Then I felt it—my balls tingling hard, right before the heat shot up and exploded inside of me. I emptied myself inside him, leaning down and biting his shoulder as I experienced my orgasm like never before—intense, threatening to make my knees buckle with the sheer force of it.
I turned him around when we were both relaxed enough, kissing his lax mouth again. Then I carried him to bed, where I proceeded to taste every inch of his skin until he was moaning again. There, I took him once more, feeling like I’d missed out on so much as I slid inside him and proceeded to make love with him. But then again, I couldn’t imagine sharing this moment with anyone else—not when Sam filled my mind, not when Sam was the only one I wanted.
It was slow, and it was sensual. I took him twice in bed, having a new appreciation for it as we both came intensely. Then, when we were both too tired, we collapsed on the sheets and just came together, finally closing our eyes and letting the well-earned blissful sleep take us.
18
Sam
Sex with Justin was as unpredictable as they came, particularly because he kept surprising me with new ways and positions that left me breathless and aching for more each and every time. What started in the bedroom—and stayed there for the first few days as we tried discovering each other and searching for what made us feel pleasure the most—strayed to other parts of the apartment, with the living room and the couch becoming our favorite spots. There was also the kitchen, where Justin took me bent over the kitchen island, a fantasy that he apparently had for so long. Then there was the hot tub, where I rode him beneath the spouting water jets and had him groaning out and gripping the edges.
Of course, there was also the pool, where it all started. There, Justin took me against the tiles until I was the one gripping the edges, my butt burning from the force and intensity. He then recreated the picnic we had on the rooftop, where he placed a blanket over us and began to make me scream as he slid his head down and ate me up between my legs.
I always had the feeling Justin would be a naughty lover, and he proved that time and again as he had sex with me in places that only added to that thrilling feeling—inside his car, on the apartment’s balcony, and the rooftop which Justin monopolized by renting for the next few months. But Justin surprised me when he showed another side to our times together—the sweet, patient side, as he stayed with me while I discovered my sexuality and what pleased me the most. He nurtured and he gave, an intense lover who used his raw power and skill to please. I experimented on my own, trying to find what he liked the most and reveling when I made him groan.
The first time I took Justin in my mouth, I discovered that there was a special thrill in being in control, too, and watching the man I desired losing his bit by bit. He writhed when I licked, then made incoherent sounds of pleasure when I sucked. Finally, he came in my mouth, where I swallowed every drop eagerly and had him desperate to fuck me right then and there.
I remembered thinking in the past that sex was overrated and how I never particularly enjoyed the act. Now, I realized that I’d been too dependent on my partners without actually trying to find out how I could pleasure myself, and said partners had never really taken their time to find out what I liked, either. I’d been with selfish lovers and had been pretty selfish myself, but all my perception changed with Justin as he gave and took, and I did the same. I wanted to make him feel good, and I wanted to feel good.
Who’d have imagined he’d be a selfless lover?
It was no wonder omegas flocked to him. I should be feeling jealous, but all I could feel was a certain contentment that I was the one with him now. Justin made me feel special with the intense way he treated me, and to my surprise, it didn’t change anything in our friendship. We only grew closer as the days went by, making love when we could but also spending time just to talk and do the most trivial things, like sleep or watch a movie together. I had never felt so carefree or laughed this hard, and I had never taken risks this eagerly.
Our little bubble had to be popped when we had to fly to Los Angeles for a press conference, where Justin sat on a panel with some board members in front of the media. They asked a series of difficult questions, with the media pushing the limits by asking Justin some personal ones. He handled them all with ease, never losing his temper and even cracking a joke or two. By the time he was done, it was obvious they were all charmed by him, and practically eating out of his hands. Being this charming should be illegal, I thought—but then again, I couldn’t imagine not seeing that grin. From the sidelines, I watched, feeling myself smile.
From the sidelines, the smile slid down when I realized that my heart was pounding more than was normal, and the pieces of the puzzle fell into place.
I thought falling in love would it you like a bullet or a train wreck—but for me, it was more of an easing into it, like water flowing through until I was filled with it. I looked at him with that love now, unable to stop it even if I tried. Justin was everything that was the complete opposite of ideal, and here I was—falling madly in love.
There was just one slight hiccup to this story. I had been feeling pretty sick most days for the past week, and it was beginning to affect my work performance. After getting checked out by the doctor, the worst of my predictions had come true—I was pregnant. I didn’t believe the doctor’s results so I even ran my own pregnancy test. Sure enough, it was also positive.
If I was honest about it, I always knew I wanted to have kids, but not like this. I couldn’t believe this. Just as my life was beginning to look awesome and things were going my way, something comes along to remind me that I am just life’s bitch and will never be in control of my destiny.
Should I tell Justin?
Of course, I should tell him. It was the only way, but I have to wait for the right time, because Justin was so busy with everything right now. I wanted to ease him into the news, and I knew it wasn’t something we discussed, so if he didn’t want anything to do with the baby, I was keeping it regardless.
As for the consequence? Well, I was just going to have to endure. Love was all about taking risks, and maybe I was ready to take the biggest risk—of them all.
My plan was thwarted when I was pulled aside by one of my co-workers, who was excited to see me in Los Angeles. I was shocked to see him, but he quickly explained that he was accompanying his client to an event that was just a block away, and he decided to drop in and check on me. We chatted for a while, even though my mind was floating away at the nervousness and excitement warring in me at having to tell Justin how I truly, honestly felt.
“Anyway,” John, my co-worker, was saying, “I think you really should go to the office when you return to New York.”
“Why? Another client?”
An excited gleam entered his eyes. “They have some good news for you.”
My eyes narrowed. “What good news?” Good news was another way of buttering me up so I would take on yet another difficult client—probably someone more difficult than that athlete I handled a few weeks ago.
But John shook his head, leaning in a conspiratorial manner. “They’re talking about your promotion. You know, the one you wouldn’t stop talking about back then? Heck, you wouldn’t shut up about your determination to get it. I’m not supposed to know, but you know how things get in the office. You’re in for a pretty sweet deal when you come back, and I’m very happy for you.”
I blinked, absorbing the information. John kept talking.
“I always thought you were pretty crazy back then when you refused to take the Justin Ellis job unless there was a promotion involved—but
color me impressed. You actually tamed the alpha. All I see are good news about him now, and even his bad boy side is becoming too appealing. You’re a miracle worker.”
“Thanks,” I muttered. Suddenly I was too uncomfortable to discuss it with John. What was with him gushing on and on about how I did a good job with Justin? I forced a smile on my face and changed the subject, then bid him goodbye when he needed to get back to his client. When John was gone, I just stood there and delved in my thoughts, which were already too messy to begin with.
In my preoccupation with actually trying to clean Justin’s image, then becoming his friend, I had forgotten about the promotion. And now that he was my lover…did I still want it? Was it worth it?
I tried to imagine myself with that promotion now—a bigger bonus, a higher position, and never having to handle any nightmare clients ever again. It should have made me happy.
Instead, the thought of it in exchange for Justin had me feeling…hollow. It no longer made me happy. At the same time, it made me surer than ever of how I felt for him—the alpha who changed my perspective on life and took my heart at the same time.
High in that feeling, I turned around to face the panel again, where the first thing I noticed was Justin no longer in his seat. Then I noticed something else—a whiff of his scent just inches away from me, and blue eyes piercing me with a look that didn’t look happy at all.
In fact, he looked downright furious, and my stomach dropped as I realized what happened.
“So, I’m the key to your promotion, huh?”
He heard every single thing.
And he didn’t like it.
19
Justin
The news shouldn’t have shocked me anymore, considering I’d been standing in my spot overhearing their conversation for a good few minutes now—meaning I had time to adjust and react accordingly to the situation. As a business owner, I was always dealt with surprises and shocking revelations, with a hand in dealing them out myself. Having a poker face was always helpful, especially when you didn’t want someone taking advantage of your shock.
But the anger that boiled inside me prevented me from having that poker face at the beginning, and I watched as Sam turned around to face me, his eyes widening. He looked shocked to see me there—then my words registered, and a stricken expression replaced the shock.
“Justin, it’s not like that…” he began.
“So, your friend, John was lying?”
Sam bit his bottom lip. He didn’t respond right away. If anything told me it was the truth, it was that response alone.
Something flashed inside me, cutting me like a knife. I realized that keeping angry was just not a good thing, especially when it made me want to lash out at him. Lashing out was only for people who mattered.
And with what he’d done, he wasn’t supposed to matter. He had just done what everyone else always tried to do with me—use me to get a leg up and benefit in some way.
I should have known better than to expect more from an omega. They always wanted the same thing from me. I couldn’t let Sam see how pissed off I was from this revelation, So I kept it in. I adapted a poker expression, letting my eyes cool over until he was paying attention to them. Once he was, I let the words come out of my mouth, cool and clipped.
“I see. Well, you’ve succeeded. I’m clean now. You can go ahead and pack your bags and get that goddamn promotion you worked so hard for.”
“Justin—”
“We had a pretty good run, didn’t we?” I interrupted, keeping my voice casual. My hand fisted behind me, but I never let my face show it as I recalled all the times I had sex with him—no, made love to him, right in my bed. All those tender moments, ruined. “All fun sex, but now I believe it has run its course. You made me feel good, but I’m ready to have some actual fun again. So…go pack your bags.”
Hurt flashed on his face. “I love you, Justin,” he blurted out.
I laughed and tossed it back in him face. “You’re pretty good at this act. Go pack your bags. I’m done with you now. I don’t want to see you when I return to my apartment.”
Disgusted, I turned around and didn’t look back. I smiled at the board members and chatted for a bit, maybe to prove to the world that I was fine. Then I went back in my hotel room, where remnants of Sam’s scent still lingered.
There, I opened a bottle of Scotch and got roaring drunk.
It hurt.
It goddamn hurt, and the pain was driving me crazy.
As expected, Sam was no longer in the apartment when I got there, and a quick check in the bedroom confirmed that all his belongings were gone, too. But again, his scent lingered, and so did the memories of all the things we did there—even the most trivial ones. I couldn’t stand it, and was already thinking of selling the place and finding a new one. Then I realized that was an overreaction, and there was one other way to get rid of all these aching feelings inside me without having to rid myself of my pad.
I got out. I traveled. I got roaring drunk and got terrible hangovers, flirted with omegas and drove as fast as I could, pushing my limit and the boundaries. One particular drive ended up with me almost crashing into a tree—a wake-up call that had me switching my activities to bungee jumping and distracting myself with more omegas. But while I flirted with them, I never slept with them, never feeling that connection that I always felt with Sam—or that connection and intense need. It was so inconvenient and unfortunate, but I did my best to make up for it by buying drinks for everyone in every bar I went to, then proceeding to spend my money on whatever I could find.
I had all the ice cream thrown out of the fridge. I partied. I went all out, discovering one thing in my endeavors.
There was no longer any thrill in them.
It was annoying. It made me panic, so I switched my activities again, throwing all my effort into work and doing overtime every single night. By the time I got home, I was so tired that I fell into bed right away, leaving my mind blessedly blank from any thoughts.
But there were those rare times that even tiredness couldn’t stop the dreams. In them, I saw red hair and those enchanting bottle green eyes, bringing the pain back twice fold. Sometimes, the dreams were pleasant, where I heard him laugh and saw those twinkling eyes, right before I made him moan in pleasure. When I woke up, it was to a raging morning wood and that hollow feeling in my chest, indicating that I was missing Sam.
Tom called me a couple of times, but I ignored his calls and led him straight to voicemail. He varied from pleading for me to pick up the phone to threatening to march over to my apartment if I continued being an ass. I ignored all of it.
Finally, a few days later, he made good on his threat and marched over to my place, pounding on the door until I staggered out of bed. I had a night of drinking and fell asleep watching a movie, and now a headache was forming.
“Jesus. You look terrible,” Tom declared when I opened the door. I let him in and crashed back on the couch, rubbing my head repeatedly. I heard clattering in the kitchen, but couldn’t be bothered to open my eyes.
A few minutes later, I felt a hand shaking my shoulder. I blearily opened an eye to find a glass of orange juice in front of me.
“Drink,” Tom ordered.
I eyed it suspiciously before reluctantly taking it and gulping. There was an egg mixture in there somewhere, almost choking me, as well as some orange pulp. It was also ice cold, giving me brain freeze for some seconds before I finally felt my senses clearing up a bit. There was some aspirin on the coffee table, and I swallowed them dry.
Tom was now sitting on one of the sofa chairs and eyeing me critically.
“You’ll be fine in the next few minutes,” he deduced. “Now tell me what’s been going on.”
I could have refused. I could have told him to go to hell and kicked him out of here, knowing he wouldn’t get offended. But knowing Tom, he also wouldn’t take the hint, badgering me for days on end until I finally talked.
So, I talked.
I told him all about Sam’s deception, told him about how I kicked him out before he could further use me. Tom listened quietly, and that was one of the things I liked about him—the fact that he never interrupted or made fun of me when we talked about serious matters. When I was done talking, I laughed out loud and told him the thrill had been on Sam’s side all along, especially now that he probably had that promotion and was sitting on some fancy desk somewhere.
Maybe he would feel bad about it in the beginning, especially when we’d become friends. But since he hadn’t made any move to communicate with me—or apologize, for that matter—maybe he already moved on. A promotion was a promotion, and it probably kept him preoccupied and happy. Maybe he was out celebrating, using those flirting techniques to snag himself a new alpha and have a little fun with him.
Maybe he already did that the moment he left my apartment.
A surge of jealousy hit me, and I mentally swiped it off. I turned to Tom.
“Well?” I demanded. “Now that you heard all the sordid details, I’m sure you’re going to have some long lecture about how I should have handled it better. Come at me. You can’t tell me that he didn’t deserve that treatment after what he’s done.”
To my surprise, Tom shook his head. “Actually, I’m shocked you were pretty mild on him. The old Justin I know would have taken revenge in a different way.”
I shrugged.
“And no, I’m not going to lecture you,” Tom said. “I actually came here to tell you something.”
“What?”
“I know all about what happened—at least, parts of it. I just pieced it all together.” He leaned forward, looking at me thoughtfully. Then he stood up, heading for the front door. “Well, I’m going now. I still have a meeting.”