Bath was where she belonged and, as they continued up the steep slope of Gay Street into the Circus, her gaze was automatically drawn to Lawrence’s beautiful honey-coloured townhouse, and she hoped he felt the same. For, surely, her heart would be broken should he ever move away with Rose and Nathanial.
As the carriage drew to a stop, she inhaled a strengthening breath and took the driver’s offered hand, before stepping onto the flagstone pavement.
Smoothing her dress, Esther adjusted her hat and patted her hair with slightly trembling fingers before starting along the short pathway to Lawrence’s door. Just as she reached for the knocker, the door was abruptly thrown open and Esther came face-to-face with one of the prettiest women she’d ever seen.
‘Miss Stanbury! You’re here. It’s so lovely to meet you.’ The woman beamed, her bright blue eyes warm and welcoming and almost identical to Lawrence’s. She pressed her hand to her breast. ‘I’m Cornelia, Lawrence’s sister. Come in, come in.’
Although uncertain what to expect from her first meeting with Lawrence’s sister, Esther certainly hadn’t anticipated such an unadulterated salutation. Mystified, she somehow found her voice past the frantic thump of her pulse. ‘Thank you. I’m glad to be here.’
‘Might I take your shawl?’
‘Cornelia, will you please give Esther a modicum of breathing space?’ Lawrence’s rich, deep voice came from behind his sister. ‘You’ll frighten her away.’
Esther glanced over Cornelia’s shoulder and her heart flipped when her gaze met Lawrence’s. Dressed in a dark suit and snow-white shirt and tie, he looked positively edible. He slowly came towards her as Cornelia lifted Esther’s shawl from her shoulders.
Without breaking his gaze from hers, Lawrence took Esther’s hand and tugged her gently forwards and pressed a kiss to her cheek. ‘You look wonderful,’ he whispered against her ear.
An illicit thrill shot through her body as she turned to face him. ‘As do you.’
‘So, Miss Stanbury…’ Cornelia came between them, causing Lawrence to step back. She threaded her hand through Esther’s elbow. ‘Lawrence tells me you work at Pennington’s?’
‘I do and, please, call me Esther.’
‘Well, Esther, I want to know everything. What it’s like to work there. How you came to your position as head dresser. Everything. Let’s go upstairs to the drawing room.’ She propelled Esther towards the stairs. ‘The children will join us shortly. Would you like some wine?’
Buoyed by Cornelia’s infectious warmth, Esther smiled at Lawrence. He grinned back, his eyes soft with transparent love for his sister. Esther relaxed her shoulders, happy that Lawrence held so much affection for his eldest sibling. As an only child, Esther couldn’t think of anything more delightful than to love a person she’d grown up with.
She stared around her at the wonderful opulence of the hallway. From the gorgeous silk wall coverings, to the gilded mirror above an ornate side table, to the beautiful Persian rug beneath her feet, Lawrence’s home was welcoming, warm and perfect for raising his young family. They mounted the stairs and her gaze was drawn again to the portrait of Abigail. Yet something felt different from the last time she’d been here when she stared into Abigail’s eyes. This time Abigail seemed to smile back at her, her gaze soft with welcome.
Esther smiled. Maybe it was entirely right she was here. In the home of a man she could come to love.
Their pre-dinner drinks passed in a flurry of excited questions from Cornelia about Pennington’s, and Esther did her best to keep up. She offered Lawrence’s sister titbits about the store’s plans and how much she loved her work, adding a few discreet details about her plans for the Coronation.
Cornelia positively beamed with delight when Esther confessed that London had acquired one or two pieces from Pennington’s for the less senior royals to wear during the King’s procession from Buckingham Palace to Westminster Abbey.
‘I must come by the store and see you before I leave for Mama’s.’ Cornelia’s smile wavered. ‘Our mother is gravely ill, you see. I must visit her and hope that Lawrence will join me.’ She glanced at Lawrence who stood at the fireplace, his sombre gaze as often on his sister as Esther. ‘Everything is changing in my life at the moment and not just our mother’s illness. My husband and I are separated, Miss Stanbury. Even though Lawrence thought me happily married, nothing could be further from the truth.’ She took a deep breath and smiled once more, her gaze happy. ‘But now I want to experience more of the world as you have. I simply must visit Pennington’s again while I’m in the city.’
Sad for Cornelia’s unhappiness but pleased by her enthusiasm for the store, Esther nodded. ‘And I’d be more than happy to show you around. Be sure to send word of when you’d like to visit and I’ll do all I can to take a break from my work.’
Cornelia squeezed Esther’s hand. ‘Thank you. I’d love to learn more about your suffrage efforts, too. If there’s nothing else I’ve learned through my estrangement from my husband, it’s women must unite. Now, I can hear the children. Shall we go into the dining room?’
She swept from the room and Esther slowly rose from the settee. Lawrence drained his sherry, placed his empty glass on a small side table and offered her his elbow.
‘You know…’ he sighed, as they left the drawing room, ‘Cornelia isn’t usually this animated about anything. You’re having the most bizarre effect on her.’
‘I can’t imagine what you’ve said to her to make her think me such an exciting dinner guest.’
‘All I’ve said…’ he leaned closer, his warm breath tickling her ear, ‘is you are special, talented and incredibly beautiful.’
She shivered and leaned away from him, arching her eyebrow. ‘Is that all? Well, I really thought I would be worthy of so much more.’
He gently placed his hand at the base of her spine. ‘Into the dining room with you, Miss Stanbury. The evening is young. Who knows what else might be added to your list of attributes?’
Laughing, they walked downstairs and into the dining room.
The moment Rose and Nathanial turned from their chattering with Helen and saw Esther standing at the door, they clambered down from their seats at the table and ran forward, wrapping their arms about her waist. Esther squeezed them tight, tears of happiness burning behind her eyes as she sent up a silent prayer of gratitude to God for granting her such contented delight.
Thirty-Four
Lawrence settled more comfortably on his drawing room settee and swirled his brandy. The dinner had been an outstanding success. Not only had the dining room rang with constant conversation and laughter from both the adults and the children, but Esther had looked entirely relaxed throughout. The longer he knew her, the more he could read the telling nuances of her expression and body and, tonight, her smile, shining eyes, and shoulders, so often shaking with laughter, told him she was unequivocally happy.
Even now, as she sat on the carpet with the children and Cornelia, playing a rather raucous game of Snap! he wanted her for his own. Her pretty hazel eyes lifted to his and her cheeks flushed as though she could read his thoughts. She turned back to the game, but Lawrence couldn’t drag his gaze away from her. She’d come into his life and made everything feel entirely right.
She fitted.
She mattered.
Yet, time and again, he was afraid there might come a time when he’d have to let her go if she found his life could not easily blend with hers. He had to prove differently. Had to demonstrate his commitment to the Cause and her independence. Had to show he respected her work at Pennington’s and her love of design.
One way or another, he’d find a way to dissolve the uncertainty that flashed in her eyes whenever he inferred to them enjoying a long-term future together. He’d once thought finding a mother for Rose and Nathanial meant seeking someone full of love and willing to be at home with them day and night. Someone to be there each time they returned from school or a day out. Now he realised it wasn’t these t
hings that altogether made a good mother.
It was also a woman whose heart was full of love, passion and care for not just herself, but those around her. Someone who could inspire and empathise, love and cherish. Someone who had beliefs, principles and dreams… someone whose wisdom and history meant she had more to offer the world than he’d ever thought possible.
That woman, for him, Rose and Nathanial, was Esther. Of that, he was certain.
Cornelia clapped along with the children before collecting the cards she had won. She seemed equally as enchanted by Esther and Pennington’s. He was entirely convinced his sister had it in mind to approach Bath’s premier department store for work. Even though he was intent that David would provide Cornelia and the boys with a generous income, it would be good for Cornelia to find employment and live by her own means. His sister had fire and he would be damned if her cad of a husband would extinguish it.
Standing, Lawrence walked to the bureau to replenish his brandy, his mind whirling as he poured an inch of amber liquid into his glass before replacing the stopper into the decanter. He glanced at the clock. It neared nine o’clock. Already an hour past the children’s bedtime. Although desperate to be alone with Esther, he was reluctant to spoil the children’s play. He could not remember seeing Rose and Nathanial so content.
The parlour door opened, and Helen entered, her gaze instantly drawn to the game. She faced him and raised her eyebrows, her gaze teasing. He narrowed his eyes in response, but his smile traitorously broke.
‘Children…’ Helen raised her voice above the laughter. ‘It’s time to bid Miss Stanbury goodnight. You should be in bed by now. Come along. You have much to do in the morning.’
Amid the groans and protestations, Rose, Nathanial, Alfred and Francis reluctantly got to their feet, kissed each adult on the cheek and followed Helen from the room, leaving the adults alone.
Lawrence carried his glass to the settee and settled beside Esther as she collapsed back, grinning.
‘Well, there is absolutely no doubt I’ll sleep incredibly well tonight. The children have worn me out.’
‘In a good way, I hope.’ Cornelia laughed, as she collected the cards and returned them to the open games box on the floor beside her. ‘They’ve thoroughly enjoyed you being with us this evening.’
Lawrence tightened his fingers around his glass as he waited for Esther’s response, his focus on the brandy. So often he feared she wouldn’t be ready to take on an entire family just yet.
‘I enjoyed it very much, too.’ She sighed. ‘I hope they didn’t notice my initial nerves. It’s not very often I find myself in the wonderful position to enjoy the company of children.’
‘Oh?’ Cornelia sat back on her haunches, her gaze flitting to Lawrence and back to Esther. ‘Do you mind if I ask—’
‘Would you mind if Esther and I had some time alone, Cornelia?’ Lawrence interrupted. No matter how surprised he was by Esther’s easy admission, he would not allow Cornelia to further question Esther on her views about children. Whether the reason resided within his cowardice, or Cornelia’s inappropriate questioning, he couldn’t be certain. ‘We’ve barely had a moment to talk since Esther arrived.’
Cornelia’s cheeks reddened, and she quickly stood, the games box clutched to her hip. ‘Of course. I’m so sorry to have monopolised you, Esther, when you came to be with my brother.’
‘Not at all.’ She smiled. ‘I enjoyed everyone’s company tonight. Including yours.’
Cornelia lifted her chin and gave Lawrence a curt and triumphant nod. ‘See, brother? No need to get your trousers in a twist.’ She walked to the sideboard and placed the games box inside one of the cupboards. ‘I’ll bid you both goodnight, then.’ She walked to the door and opened it, pausing with her hand on the knob. ‘But I’ll be sure to let you know when I intend visiting the store, Esther.’
‘I’ll look forward to showing you around.’
The door closed behind Cornelia, and Lawrence released a long breath. ‘I thought we’d never be alone. Would you like me to call for some tea? Chocolate?’
‘No, thank you.’ Esther inched a little closer to him on the settee, leaned her head back and gently rested her hand on his thigh. ‘I’m no longer afraid, Lawrence.’ She rolled her head to the side and met his gaze. ‘Being here with you and your family feels… a little nerve-wracking but nice.’
He brushed a light kiss across her mouth. ‘I’m glad.’
‘It’s as though you’ve opened me up. Shown me how to not be fearful of what might or might not be. I still want to do so much, earn my own living and make my own decisions, but…’
Hesitation showed in her gaze and concern tightened his stomach. Please don’t say you’re not sure about the children. ‘But?’
‘But I think I can have more in my life than independence.’ Her eyes shone softly beneath the lamplight. ‘I think I can have you, too. You and the children. Would that make you happy?’
‘Happy?’ He huffed a relieved breath. Could she be considering they marry at some point in the future as he had repeatedly? ‘More than you could ever imagine.’
He kissed her again. This time pouring his growing love for her into the kiss, praying she sensed the passion she evoked in him.
She slid her fingers into the hair at the back of his neck and eased him closer, her tongue gently exploring his, igniting his arousal.
After a long, indulgent moment, Lawrence moved back and brushed a curl from her cheek. ‘I’ll never pressure you to do anything you don’t want to do. We can bide our time until you are certain this is what you want. The children…’ He drew in a breath. ‘I don’t want them hurt or disappointed in any way. We have to be patient for them as much as ourselves.’
‘I know.’ She cupped her hand to his jaw. ‘And I hope we have all the time in the world. I’ll be busy at the store this week, but please know it’s not because I’m avoiding you after tonight. I would hate for you to think that.’
‘Not at all. The Coronation?’
She nodded. ‘There’s still so much to do and only four days in which to get everything ready. I imagine I’ll be at Pennington’s late into the night until Coronation day on Thursday. It’s so very exciting…’ She smiled wryly. ‘And exhausting. What with keeping Aunt Mary happy, too, I’m not sure I’ll have any energy left for you, the children or anyone else.’
‘I understand.’ He frowned as his mind turned to his and Cornelia’s looming departure and visit to their mother. ‘After the Coronation, it might be I have to return to Oxfordshire to visit my mother. Despite no part of me wanting to go.’
She raised her eyebrows. ‘Are you not obligated? I had the impression Cornelia really wants you with her at what must be a very difficult time.’
‘She does, but you don’t know my mother. Her illness could be little more than a ruse to pull me back to the one place on earth I’d be happy to never set foot in again.’ Resentment pulsed through him and when he saw that his fist was clenched upon his knee, he relaxed his fingers and pushed some lightness into his voice. ‘Anyway, I don’t wish to bother you with my family problems. Everything will sort itself out soon enough, I’m sure.’
Her concerned gaze wandered over his face, lingered a moment at his lips, before she pushed to her feet. ‘And with that thought, I should go.’
‘Why don’t you go upstairs and say goodbye to Cornelia and the children while I ask Charles to bring the carriage around?’
Her smile dissolved. ‘Oh, no. It would be far too presumptuous for me to go into their bedrooms.’
‘Of course it wouldn’t.’ He squeezed her hand and stood, leading her to the door. ‘They’ll be disappointed if you don’t bid them farewell.’
When he pulled the door open, they were greeted by a torrent of childish giggling from Rose, Nathanial, Alfred and Francis… and a very guilty-looking Cornelia. She pressed her hand to her chest, her cheeks red. ‘Sorry. We… we were waiting to say goodbye to Esther.’
La
wrence feigned a glare. ‘By the keyhole?’
She looked sheepishly at Esther. ‘I’m sure Esther doesn’t mind, do you?’
He turned. Esther stood behind him, her hand to her mouth and her eyes brimming with tears of laughter. She lowered her hand. ‘I’m pleased you all waited up for me.’
Smiling, Lawrence left them to their goodbyes and rang for Charles. The butler appeared so quickly, Lawrence wouldn’t have been surprised if Charles, too, had been waiting for Esther. ‘Yes, sir?’
‘Could you arrange for the carriage to be brought around for Miss Stanbury, please, Charles?’
‘Yes, sir.’
As Charles retreated, Lawrence waited for Cornelia and the children to take the stairs to the upstairs rooms before he helped Esther with her shawl. Once the garment was in place, he pulled her gently into his arms and kissed her. ‘I’ll see you again soon.’
Her gaze settled softly on his. ‘You’ll come to Pennington’s to watch the Coronation, won’t you? A brass marching band and all other manner of street entertainment will pass right by the store. I’m sure I could arrange for a first-class view for you from one of the upper windows.’
‘That would be wonderful. The children…’ Lawrence stopped, uncertain whether she meant for him to bring Rose and Nathanial. ‘The children…’
‘Will be enthralled.’ She touched her fingers to his cheek. ‘Bring them. Cornelia, too. Although, I must warn you, my aunt will be there. I have no choice but to invite her. She’s a staunch royalist and will want to be a part of the day’s festivities.’
He smiled and brushed a lock of hair from her brow. ‘I’m sure I’ll be able to look after myself.’
She laughed. ‘I’m sure you will, too.’
With a wave, she hurried to the door and along the short walkway into the waiting carriage. Lawrence strolled outside and watched until it had disappeared out of sight. He breathed the cool night air deep into his lungs, his gaze on the thousands of stars above him.
How long could such happiness last? A moment? A lifetime?
A Rebel at Pennington’s Page 24