by Krista Wolf
“Bring me some of that mud,” I instructed him. “Please.”
Boone looked at me curiously and I shrugged. “You said the mud had healing properties. Remember?”
A few minutes later I’d packed his wounds with large clumps thick grey clay. Whether they’d help the healing process or not remained to be seen, but they dried into a nice little bandage that stopped the bleeding.
He’s right you know, the little voice in my head chimed in. You really do love this.
I sighed and began the process of drying off and dressing. Ignoring the stares I got as I wiped my body.
Maybe you didn’t realize it, but this is your element.
Walking away, I tried deciding what to do next. I had no idea what time it was, or how long it would be until dawn. I was still ravenously hungry. I was thirsty again too. I should be scavenging for food, or fixing the radio, or checking to see if the storm let up.
But I was doing none of those things. Instead I was standing here, only—
“Morgan...”
I turned and there was Shane, sitting by the edge of the pool. He was still holding his wrist, looking down into his hand.
“Could you bring me some of that mud?”
Thirty-Two
MORGAN
Shane’s hand was bad. Not ‘bad’ bad, but bad enough that I felt absolutely terrible.
“Oh my God… why didn’t you tell me?”
“Just did.”
Gingerly I took his hand in mine, blowing on it to get it dry. As squeaky clean and refreshed as Shane now looked, water still dripping from his beard, putting his hand the hot springs must’ve been agony for him.
“I don’t think we should put mud on it,” I told him.
“No?”
“No way. This is a first degree burn,” I said, wincing. “I think it needs to be exposed to air. At least for now.”
I wasn’t a hundred-percent sure, but the thought of his wound getting infected seemed worse than leaving it exposed.
“Alright. No worries.”
I smiled at him. Fact was, I was worried. But I was also grateful. If he hadn’t grabbed that log out of the fire, who knows what would’ve happened? It was brave. Beyond brave.
“Thanks for saving us,” I said.
Shane smiled and draped one big arm around me. It felt reassuringly wonderful, like it did back in the snow shelter.
“Actually it was Jeremy who saved you,” he said. “If he hadn’t shoved you out of the way, you’d be bear-food.”
“And if you hadn’t set the bear on fire, we’d both be bear-food,” I countered.
Shane chuckled. “Oh yeah.”
Behind me, Boone and Jeremy were getting dressed. Shane looked over at his own clothes, but I took him gently by the chin and turned him back in my direction.
“Hey…” I said. “What happened out there?”
Shane reached down and cupped some water into his good hand before splashing it over his face. I could see the exhaustion in his eyes now. He was wasted, head to toe.
“We tried skirting around the base of the mountain,” he said. “Visibility was better than normal, at least at first. We could see well enough to realize it was more than a single day’s hike. I—”
He stopped for a moment, then lowered his head.
“I convinced Jeremy to do it anyway. That we could always dig in if it got too cold.”
“Jeremy wanted to go back?”
He nodded. “Yes. And I should’ve listened to him.”
You should’ve listened to Boone and never went in the first place, I wanted to say but didn’t.
“Anyway, we got pinned against some cliff face. It wasn’t high, but it was steep. Worse than that, it was covered in ice.” He let out a weak laugh. “You ever try climbing an icy cliff in ski boots?”
I shook my head. Blew into his hand some more.
“Well it sucks.”
His eyes drooped at the edges. He needed sleep. That much was obvious.
“We almost didn’t make it back. When we finally decided to turn around, visibility was limited. The weather had picked up again.” He sighed heavily. “Just like Boone said it would.”
“Yeah, but you did make it back,” I consoled him. “So don’t worry about it.”
Shane shook his head. “It was my fault, Morgan. I almost fucked us. Jeremy wanted to turn back earlier but I wouldn’t listen to him. He wanted to dig in when it got dark, and I forced him to continue on. We almost—”
“Hey, hey…” I told him. “Stop it. It’s alright. You’re here now.”
He smiled weakly. “When we found the opening again, it was like winning the lottery. We started screaming and hugging. But then we got inside, and the fire was almost out. The lobby was dim. You weren’t there.”
His eyes went dark and I felt pang of sorrow, somewhere near my heart.
“We thought you left. We thought we lost you.”
I slid my arm around him and hugged him tight. “No way.”
“Maybe we lost you to him at least,” said Shane. He nodded in Boone’s direction. “We thought we—”
“It’s not like that.”
“Oh no?” Shane’s tired eyes held the promise of a challenge, but at the same time, also a resignation. “Then what’s it like?”
Yeah Morgan. What’s it like?
I sank my chin to my chest. I honestly didn’t even know. There was no good way to respond. Nothing I could say that would appease or assuage him, or even explain what the hell was going through the whirlwind of my mind.
“This place is nice at least,” said Shane, slipping from my grasp. He stood up without me, his expression blank and emotionless. “You should be happy down here.”
Tears filled my eyes. I blinked them away. There were a thousand things I wanted to say, but none of them seemed to fit. Besides, he was already walking away.
“C’mon,” Shane said to Jeremy, without looking back. “Let’s go get that fire roaring.”
Thirty-Three
MORGAN
Never in my life had I been more attracted to anyone… much less three men at once. And never had I been this wanton about it. This shameless.
At the same time, I’d never felt such an immediate emotional attachment as I did when falling for Shane.
Or the bond I felt with Jeremy.
Or the primal, instinctual lust I felt for Boone.
Fuck, Morgan!
The truth was, I’d never been more conflicted about anything. Never been in a more miserable position, while simultaneously being drawn in three different happy directions.
It was incredible. It was amazing.
It absolutely sucked.
“So what’s it gonna be?”
Shane stood with his hands on his hips, being careful not to make a fist with his injured hand. Jeremy was looking back at me as well. Boone just stood there with his arms crossed.
“I… I don’t know.”
Shane yawned. “Well you’d better decide soon, because I’m about to fall asleep standing up.” He pointed downward, to the mess of sleeping bags scattered before the roaring fireplace. “We’re sleeping right here. He’s sleeping down there.”
He jerked a thumb over his shoulder, in the direction of the staircase. My shoulders slumped.
“Pick one.”
Boone uncrossed his big arms and locked eyes with me. He gave me a look that seemed to say: ‘It’s okay, just do whatever you want’. Then he walked away, ducking beneath the archway.
Shit.
I was heartbroken and torn. No matter what I did I was wrong. I’d put everyone in a position to resent me, regardless of my choice, and I was bound to disappoint somebody either way.
Then something else happened, and my path became a lot more clear.
I got angry.
“Know what? Screw this.”
Shane’s expression went from tired resignation to shock and surprise as I knelt down and scooped up one of the sleeping bags.
I turned and stomped off, in the opposite direction. Toward the staircase leading up, to the second and third floors, rather than down.
“M—Morgan, wait!” Jeremy called after me. “Where are you going?”
“To sleep.”
“But—”
“In a bed,” I reiterated. “Alone.”
I stomped up the stairs, dragging the sleeping bag behind me. The bed would be cold, and frozen, and rock hard… but it would be all mine. I wouldn’t be forced to choose, or feel guilty, or worry about hurting anyone’s ego or feelings.
“Morgan—”
Ignoring their pleas, I continued upward and followed the landing. One slam of a very frozen door later, I was alone in the near pitch-darkness of the icy hotel bedroom.
Well… damn.
The whole place was much darker and colder than I anticipated. Maybe because the last time I was here, I had the benefit of two warm bodies on either side of me.
It’s so lonely.
I told myself I didn’t care. I was still too angry, too warmed up by the fury of these three guys trying to make me feel guilty for being with them. After all, they’d seduced me. They’d been the ones who’d—
Oh stop it, Morgan. Everything you did, you did willingly.
Even the voice in my head was no longer on my side. I wanted to silence it like everything else. Drown it out by pulling the sleeping bag tight over my head and letting sleep finally take me.
The bed was harder than I remembered it. Whatever fun I’d had here last night was definitely over.
Just go to sleep.
It was good advice. I’d do my level best to take it.
Everything always looks better in the morning.
Usually that was true. But in this case, was it? I’d still have the same big dilemma. I’d still be caught between three guys I cared about equally — three beautiful, incredible guys who at some point had each saved my life!
And here I was repaying them by betraying them. Or at least, trying to do the right thing by them.
Maybe you belong with no one, the little voice in the back of my mind chanted. Maybe you don’t deserve any of thes—
“Shut the fuck up!”
My words rang hollowly in the empty room. Great. Now on top of everything else, I was yelling at myself too.
Goodnight Morgan, I told myself firmly.
Still wishing I had a pillow, or a heater, or a companion… I tried drifting off to sleep for the second time that night.
Thirty-Four
BOONE
“Hey man…”
I was almost asleep when I heard the call. So close to drifting off, I was pretty sure I’d dreamed it.
But then I looked up, and there they were: Frick and Frack. The Not-so-Dynamic Duo.
“What?” I asked tiredly, sitting up. If they’d come down here for trouble, I really wasn’t into it. We had enough trouble already.
“Well first off,” Shane said, approaching me with his hands out. “Truce.”
I squinted through the steam. Jeremy was behind him. Both of them came over slowly, as non-threateningly as possible, and knelt down beside me.
“Okay,” I sighed. “Truce.”
It was good news, really. The first rational thing that had happened since the avalanche.
“We want you to come upstairs,” said Shane. “Share the fire with us. No more fraternity rivalry.”
“Never was any,” I countered. “At least, not from me.”
“I get that,” he said. “Which is why we’re here to…” he paused a moment, then sighed before continuing. “Well, we’re here to apologize.”
I raised an involuntary eyebrow. Now things were getting interesting.
“The truth is you saved my life,” said Jeremy. “You probably even saved us all, driving off that bear.”
“We all drove off the bear,” I offered. “I think it took home a little of each of us.”
“Yeah, I guess,” said Shane. “But what you did there, at the end? Man. That was pretty fucking legendary.”
I nodded, still feeling the tightness of the wounds in my back. But I could see they were being genuine. They meant what they said.
“All crazy bear attacks aside,” said Shane, “I couldn’t give less of a shit that you’re in Alpha Rho. Or that we’re in Delta Lambda Mu. Or that—”
“I get it,” I interjected, letting him off the hook. “Don’t sweat it. Trust me.”
“What he’s saying is no more bullshit,” Jeremy jumped in. “No more ‘us versus them’ nonsense. No more ego, no more pride… let’s just all work together while we’re stuck here, to get ourselves out of this.”
I nodded, secretly relieved. “Agreed.”
“Good. Glad we’re on the same page with all that.”
There was another pause — a much longer one this time — and I knew right away what was coming. It was the only thing that could be coming.
“Now about Morgan…”
I rubbed the beginnings of sleep from my eyes. “What about her?”
“We know you like her,” Jeremy stumbled awkwardly. “It’s… it’s understandable. We… well…” he glanced at Shane. “We—”
“Like her too?” I almost snickered.
“Yeah,” he sighed. “That.”
My first instinct was to deny it. To throw up a wall, and tell them I wasn’t interested in the girl whatsoever. But that would’ve been wrong. Actually, that would’ve been the polar opposite of the truth.
And besides, we were trying to break down walls here. For once, anyway.
“Yes, I like her,” I admitted. “In fact, I’ve liked her for a while now.”
Shane didn’t look at all pleased at that. “A while?”
“Yeah.”
“Forgive me if I’m skeptical.”
“Look, I’ve had my eye on her,” I said. “That’s all you need to know.”
He still didn’t believe me. Or rather, he chose not to.
“So it took an avalanche for you to make your move?” he teased. “Is that what you’re saying?”
I stretched my arms overhead, flexing my muscles. Maybe it was because I was tired. Maybe it was a show of force. Shit, even I didn’t know. Wisely though, I said nothing.
“Fine,” said Jeremy, letting out a long breath. “For argument’s sake let’s say we all like her. We’ve all been with her, obviously. The next thing we need to—”
“Wait, really?” I asked abruptly. “You’ve been with her? The both of you?”
They nodded.
“Together?”
They looked at each other and nodded again. This part didn’t make sense to me. Or at least, it was certainly something I hadn’t considered. I’d figured one of them had bedded her for sure. But not both.
It was definitely intriguing though.
“How exactly did that work?” I asked curiously.
“Pretty much just like you’d think,” said Shane.
“And she was into it?”
They looked at each other again, this time with a little smirk. Neither of them were lying, I could tell that.
“Yeah. She was.”
I blinked away my disbelief and scratched my stubbled chin. Maybe this girl was different than I’d originally thought. More bold. More daring and adventurous.
It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. I just couldn’t believe it.
“Damn,” I said. “That’s a new one.”
Shane nodded. “It was new for us too,” he said. “And obviously for her.”
“Probably made easier by the fact we’re thrust into this crazy situation together,” said Jeremy. “Danger. Freezing cold. Taking comfort in each other… all that good stuff.” He paused, then grinned at me. “Having a giant hot tub down here probably doesn’t hurt either, I’m sure.�
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“No,” I laughed. “It sure doesn’t.”
I looked at each of them, kneeling beside me. We weren’t exactly best friends now, but we were no longer enemies either. Barriers had been broken.
“So what next?”
“Well,” said Jeremy. “We’ve got an idea, if you’re up for it. And if she agrees to it, of course.”
“Which is?”
Shane reached out for me and we locked wrists. I let him pull me to my feet.
“Come upstairs with us and we’ll show you.”
Thirty-Five
MORGAN
I was shivering violently, even wrapped in the cocoon of my sleeping bag. Tossing and turning and silently cursing myself for making such a radical stand.
There was a fire going downstairs! And beneath that, what basically amounted to a comfortable steam room. Yet here I was stuck on a frozen bed, in a frozen room, on the third floor of an ice hotel.
At least the checkout times were reasonable.
I laughed at my own bad joke, and my laughter came out maniacal. As I sat up for the umpteenth time looking for an excuse to go back downstairs, I realized with a strangled gasp that I wasn’t alone.
“Shit!” I clutched my chest, which had gone from resting to heaving in half a heartbeat. “You scared me!”
Shane and Jeremy were standing near the doorway, looking me over. They were probably warm. No… they were definitely warm. My body screamed at me to wrap the two of them around me like a blanket.
“Come downstairs with us.”
I wanted to. God how I wanted to! And yet… I just couldn’t.
“I can’t.”
A stream of curses went off inside my head. I was being crazy. I’d survived an avalanche, and I was refusing heat and warmth to make some stupid, dramatic, romantic stand. In fact—
Suddenly they parted, and a third figured stepped up between them: Boone.
“Yes,” he said. “You can.”
My heart leapt into my throat. They were standing together, side by side. All three of them.