Because no matter how used to sitting on the big Drake’s lap and being close to him I got, I could never quite get used to the surge of pleasure and power drinking his blood gave me. It felt so good—so right—that after a while, I stopped fighting it. I just went straight to Ari, climbed in his lap, and took the vein he offered me which pulsed in the side of his neck.
It occurred to me after some time, that I was getting used to my strange new status as a Nocturne. And not only that, I was almost…happy.
This was such an unusual state of affairs for me, that it took me a little while to recognize it. When was the last time I was truly happy, I asked myself? Was it back before The Fire? Back when my mom and dad were still alive?
Life had been so uncomplicated then—so straightforward and easy. At least it seemed like that, looking back on it now. I was sure I’d had problems and worries and cares but they all seemed small and insignificant after The Fire.
My Coven-mates noticed my new state of mind almost the same time I did. One morning at breakfast, after my early morning “feeding session” with Ari, Avery looked at me and said,
“Well, Katydid, I think being a Vampire agrees with you—you’re positively glowing.”
Megan, who was sitting right across with me and beside Griffin, leaned across the table for a closer look.
“Avery’s right,” she declared. “Your aura has a happy pinkish glow about it—kind of like a sunrise all around you.”
She was learning to read auras and actually having success, she had confided to us, even without using any Blood Magic, which was her specialty.
“You do look happier,” Emma observed. “You’re not hunching your shoulders or trying to hide behind your hair quite as much as you used to.” She frowned. “You look taller too—is that possible?”
“Maybe,” Avery said speculatively. “Maybe it’s an effect of the Drake blood she’s been ingesting.”
“Or maybe it’s just because Kaitlyn is sitting and standing straighter and not, as Emma said, ‘hunching’ so much,” Griffin observed. “She is, what you humans call, ‘coming out of her shell,’ perhaps.”
“You guys, could you please not talk about me like I’m not sitting right here?” I said. “I don’t think I’m that much different. I’m just…happy. That’s all.”
“Now that is definitely an effect of the Drake blood,” Avery remarked, his eyes flicking over to the Drake table where Ari was sitting by himself and eating. “Or maybe just the Drake who gave it.”
“Come on, Avery—don’t tease,” I said, feeling my cheeks get hot with a blush.
“I’m not teasing, Katydid.” He grinned at me. “I’m just glad to see you looking so much better—so much happier. And I’m grateful to a certain Drake for making it happen.” He looked at Ari again.
“It’s not all about Ari Reyes,” Megan objected. “Kaitlyn has been taking better care of herself—being kinder to herself. Haven’t you?” she asked me.
I nodded and smiled at her.
“I’m trying.”
In fact, though it had been an effort at the start, I had been repeating the mantra Megan had given me on a regular basis—I’m a kind, sweet, wonderful person and I have people who love me—and I found that it really did help.
Megan was a big believer in what she called “positive self-talk” and I was beginning to think she was right. How can you ever feel good about your life if you’re constantly putting yourself down? After all, you have to love yourself in order to feel worthy and accepting of love from others, right?
So by being kind to myself and thinking and saying good things about myself to myself, I was actually beginning to feel more confident and less like a timid, scared mouse that just wanted to hide in a corner all day.
Maybe I was coming out of my shell—becoming more assertive and less frightened.
I had no idea how soon I would be called upon to prove that theory but it happened that very day, right before dinner…
49
Kaitlyn
I was on my way to the Drake’s Den when Nancy Rattcliff and her two cohorts stopped me. The halls were mostly deserted, since everyone was in their dorms getting ready for dinner. The Weird Sisters seemed to appear from nowhere—they surrounded me and backed me up against a wall.
“Well, well you little freak,” Nancy purred, giving me a nasty smile. “And where do you think you’re going?”
The old Kaitlyn would have hung her head and retreated into herself, hoping they would just go away. But I didn’t feel like the old Kaitlyn anymore—didn’t feel like I deserved to be mistreated or abused.
“Where I’m going is none of your business, Nancy,” I snapped, lifting my chin. “So let me go, now.”
“Oh, I don’t think so,” Nancy said, glaring at me with her big, black eyes. The top half of her face was pretty—really pretty—with high cheekbones and dark eyes and a cute little tip-tilted nose. But the bottom half was where everything went wrong—her jaw was almost masculine and her mouth was huge and filled with big white tombstone teeth that seemed to gnash like a hungry hippo’s when she talked.
“I know where she’s going,” one of the other Weird Sisters sing-songed. “She’s going to see Ari Reyes, the Drake prince.”
“Everyone in the whole Academy is talking about the two of them,” the other Weird Sister said.
“Well she won’t be seeing him anymore,” Nancy snarled. She glared at me. “Ari Reyes is mine—got it, you little freak? So you stay away from him from now on!”
The old me would have cowered and begged her to let me go and promised anything she wanted. But to my surprise, I did none of these things. Instead, I lifted my chin and stared her in the eyes.
“If Ari is yours, hadn’t you better let him know?” I asked. “He’s never said anything to me about it so I don’t think he has any idea.”
“I’m his princess—his fated-mate,” Nancy snapped. “He just doesn’t know it yet. And you’re going to get out of the way so I can make him see the truth—that I’m the one he wants.”
I shrugged coolly. “I can’t promise to stop seeing him, but I’ll be happy to pass the message on. I’m sure Ari will be surprised to hear it.”
“You little bitch!” Nancy’s eyes narrowed and her face grew white with anger. “He’s only with you because he can’t see you!” she snarled. “Because you’re always hiding behind that rat’s nest of hair all the time. Well, we can fix that.”
Up until now she’d been holding her hands down by her sides. Now she raised them and I saw a silver gleam as what she had in her right hand caught the light—a pair of scissors. No—not even scissors—these were huge, heavy, old-fashioned looking things and the blades were nearly nine inches long. Shears would probably be a better name for them.
“Let’s see how much Ari likes you when he can see the freak side of your face as well as the pretty side.” Nancy grinned nastily as she grabbed the front of my hair and raised the scissors.
Up until then, I’d been feeling surprisingly calm about the whole situation. I wasn’t even afraid, though they had surrounded me. But though I had been feeling better about myself, I still wasn’t ready to show the scarred side of my face to anyone and everyone who looked at me. Losing my long black hair would be like losing my armor—my last line of defense.
I wasn’t ready for that—not yet and maybe not ever.
“No!” I screamed as the sheers began to cut and the first few strands of my long black hair fell. Throwing myself back against the wall behind me, I kicked out with one foot, catching Nancy in the midsection and sending her backwards with a surprised grunt.
“Oof!” She landed on her back and the heavy pair of silver shears fell from her hand.
The two girls on either side of me let go of my arms and ran to her.
“Oh Nancy—that bitch! Are you okay?” one of them panted.
“I can’t believe that little freak kicked you!” the other exclaimed, as though I was the horrible per
son in this scenario for defending myself.
Nancy’s face was twisted into a sneer of pure rage as she sprawled on her back like a bug in the middle of the hallway.
“Why did you let go of her?” she demanded, glaring at the other two. “Don’t let her get away—I’m not done with her haircut yet!”
I didn’t wait to hear any more. From the moment I kicked her, I had been frozen to the spot. But now my paralysis seemed to break and I ran as fast as I could for the West Tower.
If I can just get there, I thought wildly to myself. If I can just get to the Drake’s Den, I’ll be safe—I know I will!
Because only Ari and I could enter it, I knew I was right. But I had to get there before Nancy and the Weird Sisters could catch me.
I ran flat out, my breath tearing in my lungs as my feet slapped the flat flagstones of the floor. I rounded the corner and saw the Curve of the West Tower up ahead. And just to one side of it was the secret corridor that only appeared when I was looking for it—the short, hidden hallway that led to the Drake’s Den.
“Get her!” Nancy was screeching behind me and I knew they were right on my heels, but I didn’t dare to look back. I felt a hand snag in my hair and pull a few strands loose but the sharp little pain only made me run faster. The hallway—if only I could reach the hallway!
I nearly skidded right past it in the slippery-soled Mary Jane shoes that were the standard uniform-issue for girls at Nocturne Academy. At the last minute though, I managed to grab the corner of the wall and slide myself into the narrow, secret corridor.
“Where did she go?” I heard someone say.
Looking to my left, as I stood there panting, I saw Nancy and her two cohorts looking around the main hallway in bewildered confusion. In fact, they looked right at me but didn’t seem to see me at all.
I frowned, trying to get my breath back. What was going on? Were Nancy and her crew unable to see me because of the magic of the castle which concealed the Drake’s Den from anyone unauthorized to enter it?
It seemed the likeliest explanation. I could still see the three of them, looking all around. They were probably seeing just the blank stone hallways, unaware that just feet from their faces was a secret corridor where I was hiding.
They searched for a while as I watched, fascinated, and then Nancy finally shrugged.
“Well, who knows what mouse hole the little freak ran into? It doesn’t matter anyway—we have what we need. Come on.”
She beckoned with the big silver shears and the other two girls followed her without question, leaving my line of sight as their footsteps echoed down the hallway.
I stared after her for a moment, confused and angry and filled with misgivings. What had she meant “we have what we need?” What had they needed from me?
I had no answers but it was almost time for my nightly feeding session with Ari. He might even be already waiting for me in the Den, as he often was. If so, I hoped he hadn’t heard what had just happened with Nancy. I didn’t know if I wanted to tell him the things that she’d said or not —I wasn’t sure how he would react.
Taking a deep breath, I spoke the Drake word to reveal the thick wooden door and then let myself into the Den.
50
Kaitlyn
Ari wasn’t there yet, much to my relief—I needed more time to calm my nerves before I saw the big Drake. But once again, the Den had anticipated my needs and I found something new—a small mirror hanging on one wall.
Anxiously, I used it to examine my hair. To my infinite relief, the long black strands were only a little ragged at the top. Nancy had only just begun to cut when I kicked her away so I had lost hardly any hair to her long silver shears.
I smoothed my hair carefully, making certain the left side of my face was covered. It’s all right—everything is going to be all right, I told myself, trying to calm my frazzled nerves. The attack had left me feeling breathless and violated and my hands shook as I groomed myself.
“Well hello, Kaitlyn—have you been here long waiting for me?”
The Deep voice behind me made me whip around. I saw Ari standing there, smiling at me. But when he saw my face, his own grew suddenly stern.
“Something happened,” he said to me. “What?”
“I…it was…was nothing,” I told him, looking down at my feet.
“Kaitlyn, don’t lie to me. I can smell your fear and uncertainty,” he told me. He ran a hand through his own hair. “Dios, I just want to help you.”
“I’m fine,” I insisted again, though it really wasn’t true. “I just…had a run-in with Nancy Rattcliff—that’s all.”
His face grew as dark as a thundercloud and, taking my hand, he led me over to the big leather chair. Seating himself in it, he drew me down to sit on his lap as I usually did.
“Tell me,” he said simply. “Leave nothing out.”
After a moment, I did.
“Nancy and the Weird Sisters caught me out in the hallway,” I told him in a shaking voice. “She said…” I cleared my throat. “She said that you were hers and that I’d better leave you alone from now on.”
“I see,” Ari murmured quietly, although his eyes were glowing gold with anger. I sensed the presence of his Drake in the room with us and wondered if he was angry too. “Go on,” Ari told me. “What did you say to her?”
I lifted my chin.
“I told her I couldn’t promise to stop seeing you but that I would pass her message on to you,” I said.
Ari laughed. “Dios! And I can just imagine the tone you used, too! How did she take the news that she could not ‘have’ me, then?”
I drew a ragged breath—this was where things got hard.
“She…she tried to cut my hair,” I said, dropping my eyes to my hands, which were twisting in my lap. “She said if you could…could see the ugly side of my face as well as the, uh, pretty one, you wouldn’t want me anymore. I mean, not that you want me now,” I went on hastily. “I know you’re only giving me your blood out of a sense of obligation, because of what Sanchez did and—”
“Kaitlyn—look at me,” he interrupted. When I wouldn’t, he lifted my chin and looked into my eyes. Then he lifted the curtain of hair that covered the left side of my face.
“Don’t!” I tried to stop him but he shook his head.
“No,” he murmured. “No, let me see you—don’t hide your beauty from me, Kaitlyn.”
“It’s not beautiful,” I whispered. “It…it’s ugly. So ugly.”
Ari shook his head.
“Never call yourself that. You are beautiful—always beautiful to me.”
Then he pulled me towards him and kissed the scarred left side of my face—gentle kisses that fell like the flutter of butterfly wings across my twisted epidermis. Kisses so tender and careful and yet so sweet and sincere I felt my breath catch in my throat.
And then his mouth found mine.
It wasn’t my first kiss—I’d kissed a boy at summer camp, the year before The Fire—or rather, he had kissed me. I hadn’t liked it much—it had been a sloppy affair with too much tongue. Plus the boy in question had been wearing braces which cut my lip.
Kissing Ari was nothing like that. Our mouths fit together like two pieces of a puzzle and his arms came around me and held me close, making me feel warm and safe and protected like I hadn’t since before The Fire. It was such a good feeling it was almost scary—the same way it felt so intense when I took his vein.
But…what were we doing?
And more importantly, why were we doing it? Why was he kissing me? Did he really feel…that way for me?
With questions spinning through my head, I was the first to pull away. I looked at him uncertainly and then looked down at my hands again. I was panting a little and I didn’t know what to say.
Ari seemed to sense my confusion but he didn’t try to talk or explain himself. He just offered me the side of his neck and murmured, “Drink now, Kaitlyn.”
The thirst overcame me then and I did a
s he said, sinking my fangs into his neck and losing myself in him completely.
Ari groaned softly and stroked my back with his big, warm hands as I drank and the warm feelings built between us again, but in a different way. What were we doing? I asked myself again, as I drank from him. What was happening between us? Surely this was about more than the obligation he felt to make up for Pedro Sanchez’s wrong-doing. Could it be that Ari really cared for me? Could it be that—
But no. I pushed the thought away. Just because he kissed me, it didn’t mean anything. The feelings between us when I fed from him were just intense—that was all—I was sure of it.
“Mmm, L’lorna,” I love the feel of your little fangs in my throat,” he growled softly.
I pulled away, having had my fill, and looked up at him. He was sprawled in the big leather chair and I was curled in his lap like a little girl, which my head resting against his broad chest.
“I like it too,” I confessed softly. “Drinking from you, I mean. But what does L’lorna mean? Is it a word in Spanish? Or in the Drake language?”
He looked down at me, as though he wasn’t sure he wanted to answer or not. But at last he sighed.
“It’s from the ancient Drake tongue,” he said. “It means ‘little sweet one.’ It’s a, uh…” He cleared his throat. “A term of affection that mated Drakes give their brides.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. Did this mean he was planning to make me his bride? But that was impossible, wasn’t it? After all, I was a second-rate Nocturne and he was a big, handsome, powerful Drake. Not to mention his people still adhered strictly to The Edict. There was no way there could be anything between us.
Not anything permanent, anyway.
“I’m not a Drake,” I pointed out at last. “I’m a Nocturne—a Made Nocturne. Which means I’m not welcome anywhere.”
“You are welcome with me—always,” Ari rumbled. “I don’t care that you’re not a Drake—or that you’re a different species than me. The Edict is dead, as far as I am concerned. You are my L’lorna, Kaitlyn—now and forever.”
Fang and Claw: Nocturne Academy, Book 2 Page 20