He caught sight of his birth mother as she knelt weeding a garden bed over near the fir tree. Not a day passed when he wasn’t filled with gratitude for finding Meredith or for the way she’d received him. Warm, generous and uplifting, she’d opened her life to him. Even after eighteen months a wave of emotion still caught him by surprise and made his throat ache. She was everything he’d hoped to find, and more.
Guilt twisted inside. She could never know that, even after being reunited, a part of him remained displaced. In the short space of two years he’d lost his adoptive mother to cancer, the support and approval of his adoptive father and the woman he’d been hoping to spend his future with. He couldn’t trust that life was done messing with him.
The radiance of Meredith’s smile triggered a fresh assault of guilt. ‘Hi, darling.’
‘Hi.’
In honour of the memory of the gentle and unselfish woman who’d adopted and raised him, he couldn’t call Meredith ‘mum’. To his relief she understood.
Meredith came to her feet and brushed the hair off her forehead with the back of her pink-gloved hand. Even dressed in her gardening clothes she appeared graceful and stylish. It was no surprise Cressy said she’d once been crowned Miss Woodlea Showgirl. ‘Any luck with Reggie?’
‘No.’
‘Not even with my homegrown carrots?’
‘I still got his does-my-butt-look-good-in-this pose.’
Meredith’s laughter chased away his tension. ‘Maybe next time?’
‘Maybe.’ Tanner walked over to the laden wheelbarrow. ‘The usual place?’
‘Yes, thanks. Patch’s still out with Phil. They’ll be back from checking the cattle soon. He may be young, but Phil says he’s got the makings of a great working dog.’
Tanner nodded, but didn’t take hold of the wheelbarrow handles. Concern shadowed Meredith’s blue eyes. He’d sensed she’d been wanting to say something over the past few days. Even though he shared the main homestead with Meredith and her husband, Phil, he lived in the granny flat in a side wing. Unless they had a meal together, there wasn’t always an opportunity for a serious talk.
‘Tanner … we’re really enjoying having you home.’
He fought the urge to fold his arms. ‘It’s good to be back.’
He didn’t need to add for a little while. Meredith’s gaze already searched his face.
‘Do you think you’ll be here until the wedding?’
Tanner had a flashback to the delight in Edna’s smile when she mentioned Bethany taking on a project horse. ‘No, but I won’t leave for long. Denham’s twitchy enough as it is.’
‘Yes, he’s been over more than usual for morning smoko.’
‘As much as he groans about wedding plans, he can’t wait until he says “I do”.’
Meredith’s smile grew tender. ‘Phil was the same.’
During Tanner’s first autumn at Claremont, Meredith and farm manager Phil had exchanged their vows in a small intimate garden wedding. A picture taken on the day of Meredith and him together was one of two photos Tanner carried in his wallet. The other picture was of his adoptive parents.
Shoulders tight, he took hold of the wheelbarrow handles. Photos could capture special memories, but they also provided a reminder of the realities of life. In the picture of his adoptive parents, his mother had looked healthy and his father had been laughing at something he’d said.
Meredith bent to collect a fallen weed and added it to the pile in the barrow. ‘So how are Neve’s pony and donkey going?’
Tanner stiffened. The lipstick target on his bachelor back was making him overly suspicious. Meredith didn’t mean anything by her casual question, even if she threw him a quick look. It wasn’t like her to play matchmaker. She often asked how his horse training was going.
‘Good. They’re no longer escapees.’
‘That will be a relief to Neve.’ Meredith moved away to pull a broadleaf dandelion out of the lawn. ‘She’s been just what those two girls have needed since they lost their mother. I suspect they’re what she’s needed too. I’ll give you some jam drops to take over.’
Tanner nodded. Empathy flooded him for Maya and Kait’s loss.
Meredith’s remark about Neve also validated his feeling that all wasn’t rosy in her world. Unease fuelled his restlessness and he pushed the wheelbarrow over to the compost heap. Neve’s life wasn’t any of his business. Independent and self-sufficient, she wouldn’t appreciate his concern.
But that afternoon when he handed Neve the container of jam drops, all thoughts about keeping to himself evaporated. Today she wore her usual jeans, bright cotton shirt and Woodlea vet cap, but she’d pulled her hair into a ponytail. It didn’t matter if her smile was composed, dark smudges underlined her eyes. The pale curve of her nape and the delicate jut of her cheekbones further heightened an impression of fragility.
She took hold of the container with a brief smile. ‘The girls will be excited. We love Meredith’s baking.’
Now was the time to keep their conversation professional and talk about what he’d be doing with Dell and Bassie today. Instead, he placed a hand on his abs. ‘Don’t we all. I’m sure Arrow groans every time I get on him.’
Amusement kindled in Neve’s green eyes. ‘Arrow’s a great name.’
‘He’s a straight-and-true kind of horse.’
‘He sounds wonderful. What colour is he?’
‘Palomino.’
Neve nodded before her smile ebbed. She turned to look at Bassie and Dell. ‘So what’s the plan for today?’
‘Seeing as the girls aren’t here, and if you’d like, you could lunge the terrible twosome.’
As he’d hoped his light tone returned the smile to her eyes.
‘I’m warning you now, my horse experience is limited, but I’m game.’
‘Great. Let’s catch them.’
In the years since he’d graduated from his claustrophobic city law degree and gone in search of his dreams, he’d helped many horse owners lunge their animals. But never had a round yard felt so small and never had he been so aware of a woman. Neve stood at least an arm’s length away, but all he could smell was the fresh scent of flowers. Her long ponytail hung down her back, drawing his attention to the curve of her waist beneath her loose purple shirt.
‘Like this?’ she asked over her shoulder.
He forced himself to focus on anything but her. ‘Yes. Now lift your arm to signal to Bassie that he needs to walk away from you and out to the yard edge.’
When Bassie didn’t move, Tanner said quietly, ‘He’s such a rascal. When he doesn’t listen, make sure you have his attention and then add a little more pressure.’
Before he could suggest some techniques, Neve said, ‘Bassie. Out you go.’
Neve’s tilted chin and firm tone communicated she meant business. Bassie swished his golden tail before walking out and then around her.
Neve flicked Tanner a happy and relieved look. Her checking in with him communicated they were a team. He clenched his teeth. Other clients had felt the same way, so why then did his heart hammer in his chest when Neve looked at him with trust and not a trace of wariness?
Bassie ambled a full circle and then walked to where Neve stood in the centre of the yard.
Tanner spoke quietly. ‘He’s still testing you. You’re the one who decides when to stop. Give him a pat to reassure him and send him out again.’
Neve followed his instructions and this time Bassie didn’t stop after he’d walked a full circle. Once the pony had circled her again and Tanner could see Neve adjust her position to always be behind Bassie’s shoulder, he told Neve to ask Bassie to ‘trot on’. The pony’s mane and tail shimmered as his tiny hooves went up and down.
After Bassie had completed two laps, Neve sent Tanner a sideways glance. ‘He’s going well so this would be a good time to bring him in and to go around the other way.’
He nodded. ‘It would be.’
Neve was a quick learner and she�
�d soon be able to handle Bassie and Dell without his help. The realisation brought with it relief as well as a sense of disquiet. Neve, with her sea-green eyes, her unselfishness and her secrets, had got under his skin. He should be counting down the days until he resumed his solitary life. Instead, the loneliness that he had no time for pushed itself onto his to-be-dealt-with list.
Knowing she wasn’t focused on him, he passed a hand around the base of his neck. It wasn’t just children or small-town matchmaking that dried his mouth. Neve Fitzpatrick was now number three on his list of things that terrified him.
CHAPTER
4
‘When’s Tanner here?’ Maya looked up from the picture she’d been drawing for the past half-hour. The brightness of her brown eyes matched the excitement infusing her voice. Tanner’s visit was already the highlight of her day.
Neve liked to think that brushing Dell and Bassie and playing with Patch was what the five-year-old enjoyed. The truth was reflected in her picture. Maya had drawn a large cowboy in a hat alongside a smaller pony, donkey and black-and-white dog.
‘Soon, sweetheart.’
Maya returned to colouring in.
Kait grinned from across the kitchen table where she played with a white toy horse. She’d given up on drawing after five minutes, but her anticipation at seeing Tanner hadn’t waned. Expression hopeful, she kept staring out the window.
Neve withheld a sigh as she placed a pile of photographs of her grandparents’ wedding day into a labelled envelope. She didn’t need any reminder of how Tanner had won over the girls as well as Dell and Bassie. The taffy pony now waited at the gate with Dell whenever Tanner’s ute appeared.
‘Tanner’s nice,’ Maya said as she chose a different pencil. ‘Dell and Bassie like him. He also knows Bassie has the red-and-black lead.’
Neve gave in to her restlessness and left her seat. The girls’ desperation to see Tanner sent her nerves into a freefall. It was hard enough as it was to not feel self-conscious around him without her also looking forward to his visits. ‘How about we catch Dell and Bassie before Tanner arrives?’
Maya and Kait were out of the kitchen door before Neve had finished speaking. She double-checked they had on boots and a hat before they raced outside. She also made sure she filled a small container with a chopped apple.
She followed the girls into the mid-morning sunshine. While the days were balmy and the skies blue, the cool, crisp nights flagged winter was on its way. Against the shed was a pile of wood Hewitt had cut for whenever Neve needed to light the fire in the living room. It wouldn’t be long until the scent of wood smoke filled the night air.
To her left the vegetable beds looked bare, but soon tiny green shoots would push themselves through the watered soil of the two far beds. She’d also get some seedling punnets on her next town visit to finish off the last two beds. She just hoped all the local talk about locust swarms migrating eastward wouldn’t prove true. This time she wanted to at least eat one vegetable from the garden.
Happy giggles sounded as Maya and Kait patted Dell and Bassie as they pushed their noses through the gaps in the fence panels. Despite their gentleness with the girls and Tanner having made taming the terrible twosome look easy, Neve wasn’t fooled. Bassie regularly sent her a sly and sassy look. He’d revert back to being a rascal before she could even blink.
The girls turned to face her and held out their hands. She placed a piece of apple on each small flattened palm. When Tanner had instructed them on the safe way to feed Dell and Bassie, strain had etched his face, but his words had been quiet and gentle. He still avoided the girls as much as possible, but their high opinion of him said they saw through his reserve to the kindness within.
Once Maya and Kait had fed the pony and donkey their apple, Neve took the leads and headcollars and went through the paddock gate. The girls waited outside, brushes in their hands. Dell stood still while Neve slipped on her headcollar and then followed her over to the fence. Bassie looked like he was going to walk away, but then stayed where he was while Neve buckled on his headcollar. When it came to moving, he then didn’t budge. His four tiny feet were planted in the red dirt as though they’d been anchored there for centuries.
Neve used the calm and patient voice that worked on her young occupational therapy clients who were reluctant to participate in their first therapy appointment. It usually only took a couple of swings in the colourful hammocks that had been suspended from the ceiling and she’d never have to use such a voice again.
‘Bassie … walk on.’ She touched his shoulder like Tanner had shown her and took a firm hold of the lead where it clipped onto his headcollar beneath his caramel jaw. Bassie sighed and moved.
She tied him to the fence using the baling twine and made a conscious effort to relax. Tanner wasn’t here; there was no reason to be so on edge. Bassie and Dell, and even the girls, would pick up on her tension if she wasn’t careful.
She hadn’t taken two steps away when Bassie suddenly lifted his head, leaned back on his haunches and pulled. The baling twine snapped. Lead rope trailing, and his hooves kicking up powdery dust, he galloped to the far end of the orchard.
Neve took hold of Dell’s headcollar in case she followed, but the donkey didn’t even look in the direction Bassie had bolted. The jenny would have seen Bassie behaving badly many times before.
The girls stared at Neve, their brown eyes large and round. She gave what she hoped passed as a relaxed grin. ‘It’s okay. Bassie didn’t hurt himself. I’ll go and bring him back.’
While Neve headed to the far corner of the paddock, she searched the winding gravel road into Rosewood. It was important she dealt with Bassie without Tanner’s help. Her pace quickened as she saw a flash of blue and a wisp of dust.
Between using the tactics Tanner had taught her, and having the lead rope to grab hold of, she was surprised at how quickly she had Bassie retied to a new piece of baling twine. Before she moved away, she held his unblinking pony stare. Eventually, she’d be privy to all his naughty pony tricks.
Tanner drove through the front gate and parked in his usual place beneath the cedar tree. As soon as Patch was unclipped from the chain on the back of the ute, he leapt to the ground and bounded over to the girls. As wary as Tanner was of the two little redheads, Patch was besotted with them. The feeling was mutual. Neve’s heart warmed as the border collie wriggled so much the laughing girls could hardly pat him.
A grin tugged at Tanner’s mouth as he watched Patch with the girls. The curve of his masculine lips caused Neve’s stomach to swirl. He had the most gorgeous smile.
Tanner nodded at Maya and then Kait. Even though he didn’t say anything, Neve knew that when he greeted each child they’d felt like they were the sole focus of Tanner’s world. She too felt that way whenever he looked at her. His gaze had an intensity and an honesty that, as much as she didn’t want to admit it, connected to something deep within her.
His light-blue eyes briefly met hers as he held up the donkey rug he carried. ‘I was in town. Dell might need this.’
‘Thanks. Clare called to say it’d arrived.’
‘Bassie up to his old tricks?’
‘Let’s just say this is his second time being tied to the fence.’ She broke eye contact to stare at the pony. Holding Tanner’s gaze for too long never failed to leave her feeling breathless. ‘How did you know?’
‘The snapped baling twine.’ Tanner paused to scrape a hand over his chin. If she didn’t know better she could have sworn it wasn’t only the girls that made him uneasy; she did as well. But a man like Tanner would never be unsettled by someone like her. ‘Bassie won’t try that trick again now he knows he can’t get away with it.’
Tanner headed for the tack shed before she could work out from his expression if it had been respect deepening his words.
Smiles wide, Kait and Maya followed him. Last visit Tanner had attached some wire saddle racks to the shed wall and one of them now held Bassie’s small pony saddle.
Neve noted the way Tanner shortened his stride so the girls didn’t have to run to keep up with him.
Realising she was staring at the shed door long after Tanner and the girls had disappeared inside, she looked away. She had to stop being so preoccupied with Tanner. She’d never had any trouble relegating members of the opposite sex to the bottom of her priority list.
She picked up a brush and smoothed Dell’s shaggy coat. Perhaps that had been her problem. She’d never made time to socialise even if her opportunities to go out had been limited. It had been a no-brainer. Go out on a date or stay at home with the mother she loved and who needed her. Even those precious years together now weren’t enough.
Sadness pushed against her control. She still didn’t know how she would fill the void losing her mother had left behind. The girls had given her a temporary sense of purpose, but when Graham found a more permanent arrangement next spring she’d need another distraction.
She also had to consider her finances once she stopped looking after the girls. Her nest egg wasn’t supposed to be touched. She brushed the same spot on Dell’s neck twice. She wasn’t going to think about what would happen if she remained adrift and didn’t start to reconfigure her life.
She hadn’t registered Tanner and the girls returning until Tanner’s quiet voice spoke her name. ‘Neve?’
She took her time to turn. ‘Sorry …’
His gaze swept over her face before he replied. ‘It’s okay, I was asking if Bassie has had his saddle fitted?’
Neve shook her head. Tanner had Bassie’s black saddle over his arm while Kait held the red saddle cloth and Maya a dark-brown bridle.
While Tanner checked the fit of Bassie’s saddle, Neve helped the girls pamper Dell. Perched on the milk-crate mounting block, they then watched while Tanner lunged Bassie. Just like every other time Tanner entered the round yard, his tension and reserve ebbed and his grin grew easy and relaxed. All too soon he led Bassie back to the orchard paddock to be unsaddled.
The Round Yard Page 5